Stone Eyes Chronicles, Book 1: The One-Armed Flame
by WhatchuKnowBoutMe
Summary: So... I died, and that's annoying. Being reborn into a world where people can breathe fire at will and Mondays still suck, no matter the dimension, is worse though. Much, much worse. Unfortunately, that's what happened to me. Good News: At least it's the Naruto World, so I'm not completely clueless. Bad News: I'm a CRIPPLE and it's the NARUTO WORLD. *sigh* Fuck, I'm doomed. SI/OC
1. The Carpenter's Daughter

**Okay guys, I have recently gotten inspired by several SI/OCs to try and write a Naruto one. The most notable, and possibly the most famous, is** _ **Dreaming of Sunshine**_ **by** _ **Silver Queen**_ **and** _ **Inoue Shiori**_ **by** _ **Hermionechan90.**_ **Both are pretty good, long, and entertaining. They aren't even very 'traditional' SI. Also,** _ **Clearing Mist**_ **by** _ **shadownumera,**_ **where the SI is born in the Bloody Mist and befriends Kisame. Also very good, and the only one actually finished at this point.**

 **The OC I use for this story is one I have the most experience with, I believe. Anyone at all familiar with my work will probably recognize her on sight because I use her in everthing. Sigh, yes I am using Kathy. She is, afterall, me. Also, this is practice for me because I don't EVER write in first person. Alot of the decisions I make for this story are also made with a best-out-of-three coin flip. Pardon me if it's shit.**

 **Disclaimer: I am not Kishimoto, therefore I own nothing. If you bothered to ask my father, I don't even own the computer I type my shit fanfiction on. So there.**

* * *

In my old life, my friends liked to tease me and say I had a 'situational photographic memory,' which I guess is true. When things interest me, I remember them. Remember everything. I remember almost every movie I have ever seen, every detail contained in the pages of my favorite books. It could have been years and then someone would say even the name and I would _remember._

Naruto was, is, one of those things. I had been fascinated by the manga and subsequent anime as a pre-teen. It was like nothing I had ever seen before and I soaked it in like a sponge, every detail, reference, character, everything. But by the time I had entered highschool, I began to grow out of it. Wasn't the first time really, and certainly wasn't the last. Yu Yu Hakusho, Sailor Moon, Dragon Ball Z, etc. I had loved and moved on from all the big shot anime as I had aged. They had finished, there was no more for me to love.

Naruto continued to grow though, just like I did. Oh, I would peek my head in once or twice a year, check on how the story was going and making sure my favorite characters were still alive. Fell in love with some of the minor ones and certainly the Akastuki, who were some of the most badass people in existence. I mourned when characters died, even if they had been antagonists. But Naruto had cared for them, made them whole again, and in the end, they had become better people in their final moments.

Even now, I think that's what really drew me in. The idea that someone could change lives in such ways, make a _difference_ like Uzumaki Naruto could, it gave me hope. It gave me inspiration. So when it was time for me to decide what to do with my life, I became a teacher. Iruka Umino was by far one of my all time favorites and he had been the catalyst, really. If it wasn't for him, Naruto would have never survived to become the hero he was destined to be. I couldn't make anyone a hero, as far as I knew anyway, but I would do my best.

And I did. I became a teacher and worked in some of the worst inner city schools out there, traveling the country. I was a motivational speaker, nowhere near on par with Naruto but who was?, I made home visits and got kids out of some bad situations. I started Rehabilitation Programs for detention centers, book exchanges with various prisons, and even became a minor 'face' for several Child Abuse Awareness/Anti-Bullying projects. I was happy. I was sure if he existed, Naruto would be happy with what I was doing. Was this a healthy way to go about, doing things I was sure would make a fictional character pleased? Probably not, but I wouldn't know. Psychology was never my forte. But it kept me motivated, so I didn't really care.

I did all this and more, up until the day I died. I was shot in the chest while speaking at a rally. I was thirty five, had been doing things like this for near on ten years and had pissed off a lot of people. I was, had been, changing things. Too much, too quickly. People don't like change. It hurt. A lot. I couldn't breathe and there was a weight on my chest and people were screaming, and I thought I could here someone calling my name. That's the last thing I remember before I died.

In most stories like mine, the main character is almost immediately shunted off to be reborn, or maybe they hang around for a few seconds. Not me, oh no. I just had to be difficult. I hung around for a few days. Oh, it's not like They didn't want me to go. They were constantly tugging, trying to get me to go with Them. But I had just died and I was grumpy and annoyed, so I just yelled "Fuck you!" and floated away. Floated, because I was a ghost. Like Yusuke was at the beginning of Yu Yu Hakusho. If I hadn't been so pissed, I would have been absolutely _delighted_.

I stayed around for my funeral. I don't think I've ever looked that good, especially when I was alive. Someone had maticulously brushed and styled my red hair and left it down, because that's how I looked best. I was even wearing my favorite suit, with it's green pencil skirt, white button up, and green blazer. I looked damn good. There... There was a lot of people there. Kids I had helped, parolees, whole buses full of convicts with guards. Tall, scary looking men and woman covered in tattoos, crying because I had _died._ I wanted to cry too. _"Did what she loved, no matter the cost."_ It was on my headstone. I stayed long enough to watch my best friend cry and laugh at the same time as one of the convicts retold the story of how I had made a mess of myself and the floor while volunteering. I smiled as everyone cracked up. They would be okay.

I stopped struggling against the pull and let Them take me. I just hoped wherever I was going had gummy bears.

* * *

I spent a long time floating in nothingness. At least, it felt like Nothing. I heard muffled voices sometimes, and a man humming quite a bit. It sounded, though I couldn't tell at the time, like Greensleeves. There was a higher voice too. Closer. They were shrill and loud. They screamed a lot. Deep Voice, the nickname I gave the one who liked to hum, screamed back sometimes. For awhile, I didn't hear Deep Voice. I couldn't tell for how long, but I missed them. I hated Shrill One. They sounded cruel, hard and shattered at the same time. Once, the Nothing shook and quaked and I was scared. I could feel my heart beating, terrified out of my mind. I thought I was going to die. But then Deep Voice came back and things got better.

Not long after that, I felt a disturbance in the Nothing. It had steadily began to shrink, over time. But now it wanted me out. Immediately. I didn't want to leave. Leaving hurt. There was pressure all around me, and Shrill One was screaming so _loud_. And then there was light and noises and smells. It was so cold and the Nothing was warm. I wanted to go back to the Nothing, where everything was okay and there wasn't some random woman screaming her lungs out. I flailed as large hands held me and carried me. I had always hated being carried, even as a small child according to my parents.

Wait. Someone was carrying me? I was much too tall to be carried. I was 5'8 for pete's sake! But these people were huge and speaking some kind of language I couldn't understand. Not that it mattered, my hearing was muffled like I had just gotten out of the pool and hadn't cleared my ears yet. I couldn't see very well. Frustrated, I resorted to hitting and yelling at whoever this strange creature thought he was, but I paused as I finally saw my hands. They were so little and chubby. And I couldn't talk. Only make weird baby noises. Oh no. No. Nonono. Noonononono. I was not a baby.

Or maybe I was. I mentally sighed as I went through the motions of getting cleaned up, measured, and wrapped up like some monstrous pink burrito. Should I really be all that surprised, I thought to myself. I bet They are having an outright laughing fit because of this, the cruel bastards. From what little I could see, this was a maternity ward, no matter how outdated it seemed to be. It was relatively clean, if you ignored the mess Shrill One and I had made in our shared debacle. Oh goody, Shrill One is my mother. Wonderful. Narrowing my eyes in her direction, I could see she wasn't even looking at me, just frowning irritatedly at the wall. Yes, I am sure she will be an amazing mother.

I shifted my head to the left as I heard Deep Voice speak. It had to be Deep Voice, who else could be that huge? He was the biggest sonova bitch in the whole damn room. I was handed to him like a sack of potatoes, for which I screeched at the doctor in revenge. He jumped back in surprise. He obviously didn't get many self-aware newborns in his practice. Deep Voice let out a hearty laugh at the doctor's face and I looked up at my father, because who else could it be? I couldn't see him very well, couldn't even see in color yet. Couldn't understand him. But he had such a smile and laughing eyes, even if I couldn't tell you the color. I liked him on sight. Or maybe I loved him how a daughter is supposed to love her father. I matched his smile with one of my own and he laughed his booming laugh again.

I'm glad someone other than me had a sense of humor.

* * *

I was about three months old when I A. finally found out where I was, and B. figured out what my name was. Misaki. Kishimoto Misaki. I had the creator of Naruto's last name. When I finally figured that out, I couldn't decided whether I wanted to laugh or cry. But it was decided for me when I met my first Shinobi. Which turned out to be my mother, Kana. She didn't have a last name because my parents weren't married. They hated eachother, with a passion. I had been an accident. My mother would be leaving as soon as I was old enough to no longer really need her milk anymore.

But the situation turned out to be even more complicated. My mother was a shinobi, yes, but she was also a deserter from Iwa. Not even my father knew that until some Jounin showed up at her front door when I was six months old. The Third Shinobi War had only began about a year before I was born. Obviously, this was about when my mother deserted the Rock Village and ran to hide in our tiny village on the border of River and Fire. Tou-san, as I had taken to calling him the last few months, and I didn't even object when they took her with them. I was old enough to be eating mashed, but solid foods now. It's not like she had been contributing much else for the last six months. She was a traitor anyway, Kana wasn't coming back.

I had never had a dominant mother figure in my life Before. She had been distant always, and my father had raised me after they had divorced. I wasn't terribly upset that I was without a mother once more. At least my Before Mother hadn't slapped me when I cried. Tou-san had been angry when he caught Kana hitting me for 'accidently' spitting up my breakfast into her lap. He reminded me of my Before Father quite abit and I found myself comforted by his presence. He had red hair and dark eyes like the Before had. He was towering and rough-handed from daily manual labor, like my father Before. They had the same laugh, the same high intelligence. And I loved him for it.

Kana's hair had been brown, which was odd because the only place more famous for it's blondes than Iwa was Konoha, and that was only because of the Yamanaka. She did have blue eyes though. When my hair really began to grow in, Tou-san and I realized I had his hair color and her pale complexion, but had lucked out with Kana's eyes. I was grateful, really. Throw millions of freckles on me, and I looked almost like I did Before.

I eventually got those freckles back, over the years working with Tou-san. He was a carpenter and a very good one at that. With the war, he was busy too. We were constantly moving from village to village, country to country, following the armies and avoiding the bloodshed. Once, I asked why we moved so much, never staying in one place for long. He looked at me, over his shoulder because I was being carried on his back, clinging like a limpet or something. "I'm a craftsman Misa-chan. We follow where the work goes!" He said it so cheerfully too, because he was trying to protect me from the war.

* * *

I was six before we were picked up by a shinobi team, thankfully from Konoha. Specifically, Team Minato, will all it's pieces. Who woulda thought huh? Seriously, what were the fucking chances of running into what was most likely the most important team in the entire War? Ridiculous.

"Sensei," said Kakashi as he glared at us with _both his eyes_ , "they could be spies. We should just kill them and be done with it." He was cold, eyes distant, unwavering, steel. I shook myself. Of course he still had both eyes, this was two years before that disastrous mission, if my math was right. Four before the Kyuubi was forced to attack the village. I had time still.

Minato sighed, running his hand through his hair, still keeping an eye on us. "Kakashi, that might no-" He didn't get a chance to finish his sentence.

Obito jumped up from the kneeling position he had taken to tie my hands behind my back. "Seriously Hatake?! They're civilians for kami's sake! Even you can tell that!" The Uchiha looked almost livid. I blinked at him in surprise and glanced at Tou-san, who was looking like he wanted to very much be away from the general vicinity of these crazy ninja.

Of course, the two boys, because that's what they were, _boys, children who shouldn't be here_ , began to get to argue and scuffle while Minato and Rin sighed resignedly. I wiggled myself awkwardly to face the only relatively sane ones here. I certainly didn't count. Tou-san? He was far too cheerful to be _completely_ there. "... Are they always like that?"

Sensei and student simply sighed and nodded. I glanced at the boys again before looking back to the two. "You do know Tou-san and I really are civilians right?" Tou-san eagerly nodded his head in agreement.

"What my daughter said, shinobi-san. I'm just a traveling carpenter from the Land of Rivers, moving around to profit from the war while I can. And Misaki-chan is only six. We have never strayed near a hidden village and steer clear of warzones when possible. Neither of us have training."

Minato narrowed his eyes at my father. I don't think he liked the idea of profit from war. I agreed with him, on a ethical scale, truly, but it kept food on the table and decent clothes on our back. When we had a little extra, we gave people discounts or donated to a local temple. We were trying to get by, just like everyone else. How dare Minato judge us in such a way? Everyone suffered during war time, not just the military.

I clenched my jaw angrily and looked the future Hokage in the eyes, a bold move for shinobi, let alone a civilian. I looked him in his eyes and dared him to judge us. Minato's eyes widened in surprise but he didn't look away. He seemed almost amused by the end of our impromptu staring contest. "Aa, Misaki-chan, you shouldn't look so fierce. Your eyes cut into me like stone." I rolled said eyes and snorted as he grinned cheekily at me.

It was another ten minutes before Kakashi and Obito had stopped their childish squabble, for that was what it was no matter what they said, and returned to camp. In the meantime, Rin had started a fire and we were sat around it, still bound by our hands. Bored out of my skull not even seconds later as the four quietly decided what to do with these random civilians, I had slipped off my shoes, simple but sturdy geta, and had begun picking up rocks with my toes. Occasionally, I would toss one in the group's general direction and giggle childishly when they looked up.

Eventually, they decided to just take us back to Konoha with them. Tou-san was terrified of what would happen when we arrived. He worried for me. Over the years, I had expected him to have kept me out of obligation instead of love. But there were times he made it obvious how wrong I was. Maybe in the beginning, and I couldn't blame him, but not anymore. It showed in the way his smile softened around the edges when he looked at me, how he laughed louder at my terrible, six year old jokes. When he picked me up after a long day of travel, set me in his lap, and hummed the Greensleeves song. Somethings don't change, no matter the world. And I loved that.

We were ambushed half-way to the village. Iwa nin, no familiar faces. And why would there be anyway? Deidara was less than five at this point in the timeline, I was certain. Tou-san and I were told to stay back, away from the fight. But enemy-nin were clever bastards sometimes and knew weak points. Especially in groups. My father and I? Weak points. They targeted me especially.

No one had time to react when one of the Iwa nin, a man with black hair plaited in a waterfall style, literally popped up in front of me, in my tiny six year old body, and stabbed me in the shoulder, straight through to the other side. My scream is what brought Team Minato to me, but not before my father, my Tou-san, my everything, punched that enemy right in the gut and bashed his poor, pretty face in with the hammer from his tool belt.

A scream of rage and sorrow was all the warning I had before it happened.

Before I watched a Master Carpenter beheaded by an explosive tag simply because he had been trying to protect his only child.

 **Sorrynotsorry. At all. Super long chapter, I know. I hope I keep it up, honestly. This was a lot of fun to write. Please remember to review and tell me what you think!**


	2. A New Home

**Inspiration fills me! It transcends through time and space, compelling me to write this next chapter!... Yeah, I have no idea what I just typed either. Ignore me, I didn't get much sleep last night.**

 **I know, a second chapter already? Seriously Whatchu? I am bored and it is a three day weekend.**

 **Disclaimer: I am not Kishimoto, even if my SI shares his last name.**

* * *

I screamed. And screamed. And screamed. It was all I was capable of doing. "TOU-SAN! TOU-SAN!" I shouted, screeched, howled like a demon, as my father's lifeless, _headless_ , body fell to the ground in a heap of blood, bones, and nonononono. No. He had been struck down for daring, having the balls, being just fast enough to bash in the head of a man who had just stabbed his only daughter.

I sobbed as the man who killed my father was subsequently slaughtered by Minato Namikaze, who looked as if he had just stepped in something particularly disgusting. I sobbed over my father's lifeless body, not noticing, not caring, not seeing the blood gushing out of my shoulder. I felt weak and strong and broken all at once as the skirmish, the _slaughter_ , ended and Rin, oh Rin your fate, rushed to me and began trying to heal my bleeding, ravaged shoulder.

I did not hear her pleads for me to still, nor did I see Obito green and pale at the same time as he realized what had happened. I did not see him turn around and purge what little dinner we had managed to scrounge up no less then two hours ago. Had it really only been two hours? It felt like years. I did not hear Kakashi conversing with Minato about what was to be done with me, now that I was an orphan. I did not see the future hokage frown deeply at his student's attitude.

I saw nothing but my father's corpse. I heard nothing but his deep, warm, loving voice humming the Greensleeves song. I felt nothing but the cooling metal of my father's tool belt as I slowly unclapsed it from around his middle and tied it around my own.

Rin knocked me out after that. I don't blame her. I didn't want to be awake anymore.

* * *

I woke up in a hospital, hoping it had all been a dream. That I was still me, in the Before, had just been in a coma. The instant I opened my eyes, those hopes were dashed. There was a woman, average in appearance and coloring, wearing a forehead protector with the leaf symbol, standing beside my bed. Waiting patiently for me to sit up. It was hard to do with one hand. The other arm was in a sling and wasn't much help.

She smiled slightly, trying to comfort me. I looked like, _was_ a six year old girl who had just been orphaned to her. She did not know I was mentally in my forties. I had done my grieving long ago, in those months where I could not move and wasn't allowed to. When I was a baby as well. I would grieve for this too. I had loved my Tou-san, truly. Maybe even more than anything I have ever loved in either life. But he wouldn't want me to mourn him for long. I may not have known much about my father, for all my love for him, but I knew that much.

"-'ll never be a shinobi Misaki-chan. The damage to your shoulder is simply too won't even be able to do much manual labor or heavy lifting." Wait. WHAT!?

I snapped my head to face her so quickly I might have given myself whiplash. My long hair, which I'd have to remember to cut in remembrance and mourning, flared around me like a halo of fire and my eyes turned so cold, the poor nurse flinched. "What do you mean, I will not be a shinobi?" My voice couldn't have been more like steel if you laced barbwire through it.

"T-The Iwa nin who stabbed you pushed the kunai straight through to the other side and out of your back. The kunai was serrated. It tore through all the muscles in your shoulder." She went quiet and looked down at floor, breathing deeply. "Even after extensive physical therapy, you'll be lucky to even be able to raise your arm above eye level. I'm sorry, we did everything we could."

I looked down at my arm in it's sling. I hadn't yet decided if I would enter the academy, given the chance. But it didn't matter anymore anyway. I'd never get that opportunity now. I was an orphan, broke and homeless. I had nowhere to go and this nurse, medic, whatever, knew that. I looked up at her to respond, just as the door to my hospital room slid open. In walked Minato Namikaze, followed by Kushina Uzumaki. They were holding hands.

Minato smiled a little in my direction but ordered the medic out of the room. He sat backwards in one of two chairs in the room, leaning on the back. "Hello Misaki-chan. How are you feeling?"

"I'm okay. For the moment. Who's the pretty lady?" I answered shrugging, ignoring the ache in my shoulder as I did so. Kushina really was beautiful. Minato blushed and grinned like a twelve year old on his first date. They both did. It was sweet, how in love they were.

Kushina bowed lightly from where she was sitting in the other chair. "My name is Uzumaki Kushina. It's nice to meet you!"

I blinked at her before grinning. She really was as cheerful as they said. "My name is Kishimoto Misaki." I bowed back before turning to look at Minato with what could only be a shit-eating grin on my face. He narrowed his eyes at me. "So~ Is she your girlfrieeend?~" I turned up the six year old to fullest. Embarrasing, but worth it. Their faces were hilarious.

Minato sputtered for a few seconds before glaring at me. So easy to fluster. Kushina and shared identical grins and started poking him, trying to get him to talk. "Yeah, Minato-kun, am I?" said Kushina, poking him in the cheek with a laugh. "Answer her question."

"Is he embarrased by a six year old asking questions or is that just me?" I smiled bright as the fucking sun when he looked up at me with fire in his eyes. I didn't have any time to react as he began tickling me with earnest.

"See how you like it now, you little gaki!" I squealed and tried to wiggle away in vain. Alas, I could not escape the future Kage's wrath. After a minute or two, he stopped and grinned triumphantly. I glared at him. "I'll have you know this beautiful konoichi next to me is in fact my wife, thank you very much!"

I blinked as I processed this information. I knew they had been married for years before Team Minato had formed, but it was so strange of a concept to really comprehend. How in the world did they hide their relationship? Or did they even have to? Even Minato's abilities alone could keep the two of them safe from most dangers. And Kushina was no slouch either. "So what are you doing here anyway Minato-san? Kushina-san?"

They shared a look before Kushina leaned forward and whispered conspiratorily. "How'd you like to stay with us for awhile Misaki-chan?" I gaped at her.

"W-What!?"

Minato scratched his head and wouldn't look me in the face. "Well, I feel responsible for what happened. I should have been paying more attention to you and your father. It's my fault you got hurt and he di-" I shook my head to stop him. He startled and looked at me.

"Tou-san knew what he was doing. He told me he wouldn't live much longer if we kept traveling." I clenched my sheets tight. They were stiff and scratchy. "We followed the war, rebuilding houses and temples and government buildings. People... People don't like change..." Out of reflex, I lifted my hand to my chest, where the bullet had gone in Before. There was a birthmark there instead. "We were changing things, rebuilding things. The Master Carpenter and his daughter with hair like fire. That's what people in the border towns called us."

We were silent for a few moments, in remembrance. "I... I wouldn't mind staying with you two for awhile. If it's really okay? I'll do as many chores as I'm able and help around the house!" Kushina and Minato blinked at me, before bursting into laughter.

"Sure gaki, why not? But you have to focus on getting that arm better okay?" chuckled Minato before he ruffled my hair. I nodded wordlessly.

Maybe... maybe things weren't as bad as I thought, at least for a little while.

* * *

Minato and Kushina lived in a decent sized house near the Hokage Tower. It had three small bedrooms, a decent sized bathroom, and a spacious kitchen. One of the rooms had been converted into a study and work area for Minato's jutsu and seal work.

Minato kissed Kushina before Body-Flickering back out the house to report to the Hokage. I was shown to the spare room, which looked as if it been painted to be a nursery. I looked quizically at Kushina, who smiled sadly.

"We've... been trying to have a baby for a long time now, but there have been... problems." Kurama, for sure. It would be a long time until Naruto would be able to Therapy Justu his fluffy ass.

I smiled reassuredly up at her, grasping her hand. "Don't worry Kushina-san, I'm sure you'll have a baby soon enough! You just have to be patient. I overheard a medwife say that these things take time!" She smiled widely back down at me.

"After all you've been through Misaki-chan, you still find reasons to smile and cheer people up don't you?"

I rolled my eyes before running and flopping down on the bed, careful not to jostle my arm. I sighed as I sunk into it. So comfy. "Well duh, Kushina-san! If I'm not cheerful, who will? Besides, Tou-san used to say that if you pretend you're something, you are!" I flipped over to look at my fellow redhead through my curtain of hair. "So, if I pretend I'm cheerful, I will be!"

"That's not very healthy sweety..."

I blew some hair out of my face. It was really starting to get on my nerves. "Why not? I'm still sad, I'll always be sad and miss Tou-san. But you don't get stuff done if you're sad." I said this in such a childishly simple way, I gave myself a mental pat on the back. I had never been a good actor, I was too blunt and honest for that. Tou-san had never cared how mature I acted, hadn't been bothered by it at all. But Minato and Kushina were shrewder then he had been, so I had to convince them early that I was just a traumatized, more mature six year old. Shouldn't be too hard, seeing as I am actually traumatized.

Kushina was quiet for several moments, mulling over my words. I continued to mess with my hair. In my life before, I had kept it long but always up in a ponytail or a lopsided bun. I despised the feeling of it being down, even if I always had a severe headache after a long day.

"... How about we go out into the village Misaki-chan? It looks like you need a hair cut anyway! And some new clothes." said Kushina laughingly. I pouted at her.

I grumbled but took her hand anyway as she led me out of the house. "Says the woman with hair down to her knees..."

But I did get my haircut afterall, a semi-bob at chin-level, with my bangs held back by a lavender clip. I say semi-bob because my hair is too curly for it to actually be a bob. I also got some new clothes. The ones I had been wearing were donated by the hospital. My old outfit had been so saturated with blood, it had to be burned. The only things to survive were my geta and Tou-san's tool belt. Not even my backpack full of the rest of my clothes had made it.

My usual outfit was different then most of the kids my age, from what I saw. Simple and efficient, I picked out a simple boy's hakama, with a white top and lavender bottoms. Unlike the girl's hakama, the boy's had pants and pockets to put things in. I liked pockets. Before, I had hated how women's pants had increasingly smaller pockets, so even now I loved spacious bottoms. Purses were a no-no in this world, civilian or not. They were not done.

Kushina informed me that as soon as my arm was better, she would be training me in the basics every child learned at the academy. I might not ever be a shinobi, but there was nothing wrong with learning some self-defense. So I got myself a few training gi, some chakra weights that Kushina or Minato would fill for me, and some sturdy ninja shoes. While I loved my geta, Tou-san had made them, they weren't built for training.

I steadfastly ignored the little voice in my head saying I should save them for Naruto.

* * *

 **Not as long as the last chapter, but seeing as I am updating this no less then two days after the last one, I think that can be excused. Also, it feels like the right place for it to stop. Hope you enjoyed and have a wonderful day! Please remember to review!**


	3. It Begins

**I am on a fucking roll with this story, you guys know that right? The last couple days have just been super empty. I have literally done nothing but eat and try to read through a headache or twelve. I can't tell if it's because I'm sitting right in front of a window or what, but I don't care. Let's get this started eh?**

 **Disclaimer: I own nothing, not even this computer. It belongs to my Uni's Library and most likely the Government.**

* * *

Training, especially for someone as young as I was, is hard at even the most 'basic' levels. And Kushina's idea of basic? Doing fifteen laps around a five mile training ground at a jogging pace, starting at six am and ending at eight. Kami forbid you not be finished by then, because that was her being lenient. Even if I was used to going much longer than that on a bad day while traveling with Tou-san, that was at a civilian walking pace. She wanted me at Genin pace. Uh, HELLL NOO. Kishimoto Misaki does not do running. Not even after a year and a half of this shit.

"I'M NOT A GENIN, YOU CRAZY WOMAN WITH SNAKES FOR HAIR!" I shouted as said fellow red head threw pointed rocks at me as I try (and failed) to dodge. Kushina just grinned maniacally and launched the stones harder.

"Dear…. What are you doing to poor Misa-chan now?" I nearly squealed in excitement and relief as Minato's voice rang through the clearing. I took my salvation as it came and ran to hide behind the tall blonde, and thus the rest of Team Minato as Kushina was momentarily distracted.

I clung to Obito's shoulders like a fungus and pulled Kakashi by the mop he called hair and used them both as a shield. The cheerful Uchiha just laughed and stuck his arms behind his back, piggybacking me. Kakashi growled at me and tugged his head out of my grasp. I stuck out my filthy barefoot and tried to rub his sparkly new Jounin jacket with it. I had lost my shoes somewhere around two hours ago, wasn't the first time. I had always hated shoes anyway, confining little bastards. People wondered why I loved geta so much. He dodged, glaring. Rin sighed and shook her head at out antics.

I'd been staying with Minato and Kushina for almost two years at this point. That fateful Kannabi Bridge Mission would be happening within the next few months. Then soon after that, Rin would kill herself via an unwilling Kakashi because some bastards had sealed a ticking time bomb known as the Sanbi into her. He'd be shattered. Team Minato would officially dissolve. Minato would become Hokage, Kakashi will try to drown his sorrows in missions, the moron, and Kushina will get pregnant with the child meant to save the world. Then she and Minato will die and Naruto will be an orphan… I wasn't looking forward to process. I had grown close to the group over the last two years, especially Obito and Kushina.

It hadn't taken me very long to become rather close to Obito, not gonna lie. We took to each other like fish to water, or if you quoted Kakashi, 'poison to the bloodstream.' Such a cheerful fellow, Kakashi. But I did have to agree with him. While I had never been particularly interested in pranking, I had always found amusement as the audience (and sometimes the distraction), as long it was harmless. Itching powder mixed in with some talcum? Count me in. Drawing on someone's face with a marker while they sleep? I'll be there giving you some inspiration. I like good, old-fashioned, harmless fun. You have to be able to have a sense of humor when dealing with kids. Yes, I know I'm physically younger then Obito and he's seen a lot more shit then I have. But I can see it in his eyes, the pressure he's under by everyone to awake his sharingan. So if I can distract him for at least a little while and keep everyone on their toes, I'll do it.

Kushina had filled a role in my life I hadn't known I'd needed filled in the first place, in either of my lives. I had been without a real mother, not even a mother-figure, for so long it was almost surreal to have one like Kushina. Oh, my Father Before had a few girlfriends, but they weren't really mothers. I was a naturally independent person, I'd always thought so, having been raised an only child and pulling myself out of my own damn troubles. Kushina didn't push or pull me in anyway, except in training, which I appreciated. I had never even considered Kana as my mother, unless you count the technicality of it. People Before had always told me that I was a very motherly woman, with my almost obsessive way of protecting and cherishing them. 'Natural Instinct,' the social workers I had worked with regularly with had often said. And I had never once denied it. Why would I? I was proud of it, and still am.

What, you think I don't want to change their fate? I'm a physically disabled eight year old civilian with nothing more than a little, according to everyone and their mother, self-defense training. I'm lucky that my arm survived the stabbing at all, according to the medics at the hospital, let alone being able to lift it as high as I can. Yes, I am surrounded by some of the strongest people in the Five Nations, if not now, then certainly about twenty years from now. But I am not one of those people, will never be one of them. I can't be there for Obito's death. Nor for Rin's. I won't be there Kushina and Minato's either. Not because I don't want to, but I couldn't. If I was there, Obito would kill me, like he would Kushina's guards and midwives. If I was dead, who would take care of Naruto?

Because that's what my plan is. When Minato and Kushina begin to plan who their unborn son's potential guardians would be, I would weasel my way onto that list. Jiraiya wouldn't know the first thing about caring for a child, let alone a newborn, Kakashi would be far too unstable at that point, and the Sandaime would refuse Mikoto and Fugaku custody because of the 'suspected Uchiha Involvement' with the Kyuubi attack, even if they weren't actually there. I wasn't fair, but it made a little sense. Mikoto was Kushina's best friend, of course she'd be on the list. She was a great mother.

I know, it's not the most solid plan in the world. I know that a ten year old, which is what I'll be by the time the Kyuubi attacks, supposedly shouldn't be able to take care of a newborn either. Good thing we've already established I'm not exactly average huh?

Speaking of motherliness, Itachi is about three now and already getting stress lines. I had never been a huge fan of Itachi Before, but I hadn't hated him. I never could see what so many of his fans thought of him, he wasn't that attractive. Then again, I had my eyes locked on Iruka and Orochimaru, believe or not. But I don't think I've ever outright despised any of the characters, people in this world. Okay, I take that back. I do hate Danzo, but who doesn't? Anyway, I don't dislike Itachi, I sympathize with him. He did what he thought was necessary, fucked up or not. I have absolutely no hope of stopping the massacre, I accepted that a while ago. And while I know he's one day going to be one of the most powerful shinobi in the world, that doesn't mean I can't smother him in affection.

Oh, he hates it and it's the best thing ever. Mikoto has to bribe the poor tot with dango for him to come anywhere near the house, and even then she has to drag him. He was a year old when we met and already speaking (mostly) full sentences, the little shit. I held him like some kind of twisted teddy bear for the first two hours, but alas, I was too strong for him to escape. Despite his near constant struggling and cries for assistance. Nowadays, I just give him noogies and kiss his cheeks with loud, popping 'SMACK's. Buhaha. Behold the evil eight year old.

* * *

So Team Minato just returned from the Kannabi Bridge mission. One member short.

I knew it would happen, knew Obito was still alive, but I still cried. He'd never be the same again, because Madara would get to him, brainwash him. Obito was like my older brother, and he was out there hurting. And I hated it. Hated how I couldn't do anything. How I couldn't just up and leave the village to go and bring him, hug him and say everything was okay, that he wouldn't hurt anymore. But I couldn't do that. I wouldn't survive more than a few miles. I was needed here. Not now, but soon.

It rained on the day of his Memorial Service. I wore a simple black yukata and wore my hair down. It had grown longer in the two years since I came to Konoha. I'd have to cut it again.

In Konoha, you're not supposed to cry at funerals. For the first time in my second life, I embraced the fact I looked like a mourning eight year old girl. And cried. As I watched Minato, as his sensei, and the Sandaime carve Obito's name into the memorial stone. As we all placed flowers and lit incense to ward off evil spirits and appease good ones. Even as Rin wordlessly handed me the late birthday present Obito had planned to give me once they returned from their mission. Always late, even for birthdays….. It was a necklace with simple pendant, emblazoned with the kanji for 'Luck'. It was simple, but pretty.

' _Just like you Misa-chan!'_ said the note. I tried to ignore how a supposedly dead boy had just called an eight year old simple. I even rolled my eyes through my tears and clutched the damned thing to my heart.

Kakashi didn't come. And I never took the necklace off I could help it. It became a sort of worry stone, getting me through stressful situations, while also making it an obvious tell for when I was lying or even nervous.

Rin died not too long after that. This time, there was enough left for a funeral. I cried at this funeral too, but not as much as at Obito's. Rin and I hadn't been very close. We had gotten along just fine, and she was a sweet girl, but we'd never clicked. I had talked to Kakashi more than I had Rin, and all I did was tease him. Kakashi didn't attend her funeral either. I wanted to run and give him a hug, tell him how it wasn't his fault. Because it wasn't. No one's but Madara's, the bastard. I wanted to ease his pain just a little bit, make him realize that he still had precious people. People who loved him. But I didn't. Because I knew. He would lose them too. Not me, if I had any say in the matter, but we weren't close. I still teased Kakashi, if he ever came around the house and sometimes, he'd give a smirk or even a small smile. But that happened less and less. He was taking more dangerous missions, trying to distract himself from his grief.

"Trying to get himself killed, more like." I muttered loudly when Kushina and Minato had finally pinned him down and dragged him back to the house for an intervention. Minato had already been inducted as Hokage for a month at this point. I had turned nine last week and hadn't bothered with growing my hair out again. Not when I'd just have to cut it so soon. It was now in a sensible half-do, with an almost non-existent ponytail. I had moved on from my hakama and almost always wore some kind of training gi. I still walked around the village barefoot as much as possible, my clothes dusty from the loose dirt I kicked up as I ran around the village, my father's tool belt still around my waist, wearing a permanent mallet sized bruise into my thigh. I only ever took it off for training or when I went to sleep. Fugaku-san said I looked like some kind of homeless ruffian looking for work, terrorizing the village looking how I did. But he always said it like he was more amused then anything, especially when I clocked assorted bullies with a random tool across the head.

I had started 'volunteering' at local businesses I knew would be either neutral or even respectful of Naruto after the Kyuubi attack, because I was almost positive Naruto and I wouldn't be allowed access to either the house or his trust account after his parents died. I volunteered to water the plants at the Yamanaka shop, began to act as an administrator and handler at the Inuzuka veterinary clinic, and even a 'taster' at Ichiraku's. But, I found myself most welcome at one of the Akimichi bakeries near the Hokage Tower. I had been fond of baking and cooking in general Before, despite my notoriously short attention span. So for now, I would act as a busgirl, going around cleaning up tables and filling water glasses, and recommending certain items. I was securing my reputation as a hard worker before I even needed too.

Kushina looked at me in reproach. "Misaki! Why would you say such a thing?" Minato didn't even look surprised, like he'd just been waiting for the other shoe to fall.

I scowled and stuck my finger in Kakashi's face. Not an attractive look, let me tell you. "Because it's true Kushina-san! He's going to work himself to death and you know it!"

"How about you mind your own business gaki!?" exploded Kakashi, swatting my hand out of his face, hard. I clutched my wrist in pain as he began to yell at me. "What I do on my missions is none of your concern! You're nothing more than a civilian brat who's far outstayed her welcome! You're a drain on Minato-sensei and Kushina-san's household, you stress her out so much she can't even get pregnant, she's so busy caring for you! Even as a civilian, you're useless! You couldn't be more crippled if the medics had just chopped off your arm to begin with!"

I was quiet for a moment as what he said began to sink in. Was I really mooching off their kindness? I hadn't thought so, I helped around the house, doing chores and assisting Kushina with cooking meals. But maybe… that wasn't enough? I knew I ate a lot, couldn't control my appetite, too large for someone my size and age. I didn't mean to. Couldn't help it. I hung my head in shame as Kakashi's tirade washed over me. I flinched as he mentioned my arm. It had begun to worsen as I aged, even with physical therapy to help it along. It was a good day if I could even bend my elbow with minimal pain. The medics didn't know what wrong and soon enough I would have to have the nerves cut or numbed so it wouldn't hurt.

I was quiet for several moments as he stopped yelling. Suddenly, it felt as if my skin was on fire, anger burning through my blood, roaring in my ears. I was shaking, like a volcano about to erupt. I couldn't, wouldn't take anymore. "YOU THINK YOU'RE THE ONLY ONE WHO'S STILL MOURNING KAKASHI!? THAT BURSTS INTO TEARS FOR NO REASON!? DO YOU REALLY THINK YOU'RE THE ONLY ONE WHO MISSES THEM, OR BLAMES THEMSELVES!? I lost someone a member of my family, my brother to a fucking rockslide," I ignored Kushina's automatic order to watch my language, "and what? You think I don't care? I've done my mourning Hatake! I'VE LET GO! Unlike you! If you keep on like this, all you'll do is get yourself killed! And then what would their sacrifices be for, huh? Nothing! You would have done nothing!" He stared at me in shock, as if he hadn't expected me to react the way I had. It didn't last long, because he was back to glaring, opening his mouth for another shouting match.

Minato stood up and shouted, "THAT IS ENOUGH! Kakashi, Misaki-chan, stop this arguing right now!" He looked every bit the Hokage he was. "Kakashi, you stop this now, and think for several minutes over the words that you just said to Misaki. She is only worried about you. We all are. Misaki, you are not helping the situation!"

I didn't hear the rest of his scolding because I was already out the door. I stubbornly ignored the sound of ominous thunder in the background.

* * *

I didn't go home for a couple hours, too stubborn and prideful. I knew it too, realized it as I sat motionless on a bench in the rain. It wasn't cold, just a little uncomfortable. But, I needed it. It was almost like taking a cold shower after a hot day. It cooled me down, reduced my anger to a low simmer, instead of the rolling boil it had been. I steeled myself, and headed back home.

But Kakashi wasn't there. He had left already, several hours ago, for a mission, big surprise. I felt my anger bubble up again as Kushina began to fuss over my soaked clothes. I wanted to break something, preferably a certain masked nin's _face_. We didn't see each other much, after our fight. He always made sure to show up while I was out, either at the civilian Academy, or running around the village. And I was as much responsible for our growing distance. While I never outright avoided him, I also didn't actively search him out either. I guess we were both stupid.

Time passed. Mikoto became pregnant, Kushina following soon after. It was hard to tell who was glowing more, Minato and Fugaku, or their wives. I found great joy in teasing the both of them. If you asked me though, Itachi was glowing more than anyone combined. Fugaku had grown to be some sort of distant uncle to me, in that strange, Uchiha way of his. Mikoto was certainly the doting Aunt though.

My arm got worse afterall, like the medics thought. They couldn't stop the process , so they killed the nerves and I got an awesome sling out of the whole thing. I didn't mind too much, really. Near the end, I couldn't move my fingers without excruciating pain. It would make working harder after Naruto was born, but I would figure it out. I had to, I didn't have a choice. The Akimichi Bakery let me keep working as a busgirl, and it's not like watering plants and answering the phone was all that hard with one hand. At least it hadn't been my dominant hand. I did miss not being able to work with the dogs at the Inuzuka Clinic anymore though.

It wasn't long before it was July once more and I turned ten. Sasuke was born about three weeks later. Itachi was absolutely smitten with him. He carried him whenever he could, the silly thing. Sasuke was cute as a babe, and as a child, then as an adult as well. And I told the proud parents as such, how he'd be so handsome when he was grown. Either Mikoto ignored us or was just too blissful off of her epidural, it didn't matter to her if Fugaku and I bet how much Sasu-chan would look like Mikoto when was older. Fugaku wasn't the prettiest bastard, what can I say?

I did end up making my way onto the list, by the way. Apparently, Minato and Kushina had decided that _years_ ago, sneaky sneaky. Kakashi was actually below me. I told him his risky behavior was gonna bite him in the ass. I didn't mention it to the expectant parents though. They already knew my thoughts on the matter.

The day Minato sent me to spend the day with the Uchiha family, with Kushina looking about ready to pop, I knew it was time. I knew it, even before the first wave of Kurama's malevolent chakra washed over Itachi and I. I knew before the alarm bells began to ring, calling all available shinobi. I even knew it before Sasuke had begun to cry wildly, like he was possesed. I helped Itachi secure baby Sasuke's, _little Sasuke's_ limbs as he convulsed, his system being overloaded by the demonic chakra saturating the very air around us.

Itachi and I sat silently as the world crumbled around us.

* * *

 **So what'd you guys think?! Was Kakashi in character or do I suck at writing him? Remember this is before he really mellows out, so be kind to me!**


	4. Meeting With a Kage

**Hey guys! I recently figured out that yes, my family's main PC does indeed have wordpad on it, and seeing as I'm sick and don't feel like hiding in my room for once, I am writing this newest chappie here. I am home alone with nothing more than a box of tissues and the dog for company, and I am bored. Who the hell gets a cold in September anyway? This girl, that's who!**

 **The reaction to the last chapter was wonderful, and I'd like to thank all those who reviewed! So far, I (maybe) have a pairing planned out for Misaki, but it is not with Kakashi. It shouldn't be too hard to figure out who it is. Really, it's probably super obvious. So unless I decide to do a vote or change my mind, Misa-chan will not be getting Kakashi. Their relationship will most likely be platonic... Though now that I think about it, Gai might be interesting to write, even if it would be very similar to** _ **Cleaning no Jutsu**_ **by** **Erisah Mae** **, what with both main characters having disabilities and all. A good read, if you find Gai as wonderful and amusing as I do and like smart and sassy main characters who don't give a shit what others think. I woulnd't be surprised if that's where I got the idea for Kathy's arm from. I recommend it though, it's funny. I don't know, tell me who'd you like to see Misaki-chan end up with in a review, and depending on how may people request different characters, I might have a poll or something!**

 **It has recently come to my attention, via the Nauto Wiki, that the Third Shinobi War didn't begin until Itachi was four years old, which means Misaki would have been about nine. I have decided to claim artistic somethingsomething (can't remember the name, help!?) and say it started before she was born because Drama. So there.**

 **Disclaimer: I own nothing, except for Misa-chan. And even then, there are sometimes I think she owns me instead.**

* * *

A few days after the Kyuubi attack, the Sandaime summoned me to his office. I had begged and begged Fugaku to let go me to the hospital to see Naruto, but he wouldn't let me. The news of Minato's and Kushina's deaths had hit the entire village hard, like a punch to the gut. In our biggest time of need, our Hokage had died. We were leaderless. There wasn't a day since where Mikoto wouldn't randomly burst into tears. Sasuke was suffering from nightmares and not eating. He was losing weight and fast. Where once upon a time, he'd have sucked down a bottle like Naruto would eventually Ramen, now it took more than an hour for him to even finish half of one. We were all very concerned.

The summons came while I was assisting Fugaku with the rebuilding of a portion of the outer wall, carrying blueprints and order slips as he barked commands. It was a member of Anbu, clad in full gear, probably to look as imposing as possible. Better to prevent citizens from acting out. "Kishimoto Misaki has been summoned to meet with Sandaime Hokage-sama immediately. No one is to accompany her but myself." Their voice was indistinct, not revealing the operative's gender whatsover. Idly, I wondered whether there was a jutsu for that or if you had to practice as Fugaku made to object. The main family had taken to being rather protective of me the last few days. "Uchiha-sama, you are needed here to assist with the rebuilding. I assure you, Kishimoto will come to no harm under my protection."

I gave Fugaku's large hand a reassuring squeeze before handing off my documents to a waiting Genin. They had been rather peeved about how a civilian like me, aka an obvious cripple, was entrusted with more than them. Fugaku sighed resignedly but patted me on my head and punted me in the direction of the Anbu with his foot. I stuck my tounge out at his retreating form, already shouting out more orders, and clutched the operative's hand. It wasn't more than a second or two before I felt the unmistakeable rush of body-flicker.

We appeared in a flurry of leaves in the Hokage's office, with the man himself awaiting us with steepled finger's at the large desk. I didn't think it was possible for Sarutobi to look anymore old than he usually did, but alas. Like I said earlier, the last few days had been difficult.

Slightly unsteady, because body-flicker was quite disorienting, I wandered towards the lone seat posistioned in front of the desk. It was wooden and very uncomfortable, probably 'borrowed' from T&I. Or maybe it was just a shitty chair. Saurtobi and I watched eachother for several moments before he shifted and I felt as if someone had just smothered the room. Hey, even if I hadn't recieved any training with chakra, I could still _feel_ it when focused in large amounts, just like any other civilian. The old man had put up what _thought_ was a privacy seal meaning no one, not even his ever-constant guard would be able to hear us. So we were speaking about Naruto then? Not surprising, but it's nice to have your theories confirmed sometimes.

I waited a beat longer, not acknowledging the seal outwardly, before speaking. For a short period Before, I had considered going into politics and attempting change there. This idea had not lasted long, simply because I couldn't stand the idea of constantly going around and around an issue without outright stating it. A political faux pas, if you will. I simply never had the patience for so much pussy-footing around. And I still didn't. "You wished to see me, Hokage-sama? Is this about Naruto?"

The old man let out a low, humorless chuckle. "Ah Misaki-chan, I'd forgotten how refreshing it could be to someone to cut right to the chase..." I looked at him, obviously unimpressed and impatient. "But yes, this is about Naruto. You were a favorite of my successor and his wife, not to mention several major clans in the Village. They even have you listed as one of the possible candidates for custody over Naruto. Where you aware of this?"

I nodded in agreement. "Yes, and I have been for the last several months Hokage-sama. I was informed almost as soon as they put my name down."

"Then do you have any idea as to why you have been summoned to my office?" was Sarutobi's response, who was smiling slightly now. Sometimes, when he had been invited to dinner by Minato, he had admitted to what a waste my injury had made me, with what my shrewd intellect could have provided the village. I had often been tempted to inform him that it was just because I was mentally over thirty years older than my peers, but I don't think that would have gone over well.

I shifted in the hard chair. It was making my butt numb. "You are trying to decide who, if anyone, should be given custody of their son." He nodded, though I couldn't tell if it was in agreement or acceptance of my words, but gestured for me to continue. "Jiraiya, as godfather, has first dibs. But he's almost completely unsuitable for nothing more than the distant, crazy uncle. He has to focus on his spy network now more than ever and is probably unable to care for a child on a long term basis, let alone a newborn. Uchiha Mikoto, and thus her husband Fugaku, would be next on the list, but if the rumors of Uchiha involvement in the attack are at all true, they will not be even considered, despite the fact she is an accomplished mother of two." I paused to take a breath and consider his reaction. Damn, he has a good pokerface, I wonder if he'd teach me. "Next is Hatake Kakashi, who at first glance, seems like the perfect choice. Accomplished shinobi, student and friend of the Fourth Hokage, last of a clan, etcetera, etcetera. Perfect, even if a little young, until you realize he is most likely on the verge of a mental breakdown and a burnout from overworking himself due to untreated and undiagnosed Survivor's Guilt, stemming from the deaths of two of his teammates, which he both witnessed."

I couldn't tell what the old man was thinking. He really did have a wonderful pokerface, probaly from being a shinobi for so long. I heard the Nidaime, who had been the Third's sensei, had also had an amazing pokerface. Of course, I had also heard (and seen via the anime) that he was smoking hot. He was, but I had more important things to worry about than a hot dead man at the moment. "And what about you Misaki-chan? Would _you_ be willing to raise the creature who killed surrogate parents in _cold blood_?"

I had the vague awareness of a little voice in the back of my head whispering that this was a test, but I ignored it. I was too angry at his words to listen to reason. "DOES A SCROLL CONTAINING A KUNAI MAKE THE SCROLL A WEAPON TOO OLD MAN!? I thought you were smarter than this! Professor my left ass cheek!" I had shot out of my chair in my anger. I didn't even hear his startled snort. " _OF COURSE_ , I want to raise Naruto! I promised them I would! I don't care about the Kyuubi and it doesn't care about me! The only reason I haven't been coming daily to beg you for him is because the Uchiha Main Family won't let me!" Kushina had often said my anger was like lighting a match. It would flare, bright and hot, before going 'poof' a few seconds later. I had always responded that she just hadn't seen me truly rage yet. Fugaku and Itachi both had, when I had been running errands with them and we caught some punk genin tormenting some civilian girls. I still see them around the village sometimes. They flinch whenever they hear a hammer clang. Good.

"Oh? Why is that?" He sounded amused at the my tantrum, but also rather pleased, like I had confirmed something for him.

My anger had begun to dissipate but I still clinched my one working fist tightly. "Because they think you won't give him to me. I'm probably the most ill-suited to raise a baby. I'm ten years old, still a child myself. I'm crippled and an orphan with no known living relatives. I have no money, no house now that Minato and Kushina are dead, and I hardly doubt anyone is gonna hire a ten year old, especially so soon after a disaster."

"But?" was his response. I looked up at him in confusion. I hadn't realized I had been staring at the floor. "I feel as if there should be a 'but' at the end of that sentence Misaki-chan. How about you tell me what that is?"

I was quiet for several moments, mulling over possible answers to give him. Automatically, I grasped Obito's pendant and began to run my thumb over it. It helped steady me. I breathed deap, calming breaths before finally resonding. "But... I can do it. I know I can. I know how to take care of a baby, I've been helping with Sasuke-chan for months to give his family some sort of break. Kushina and Mikoto practically sent me through Baby Boot Camp. I'm good with children and several Clan Heads like me. Ino-Shika-Cho, even if the Nara only tolerate me because of the Akimichi and Yamanaka. The Uchiha, the Inuzuka, they like me too. The Hyuuga couldn't care less and I've never had the chance to ineract with the Aburame in nothing more than passing, but I think they like me anyway. I'll get as many jobs as I need to care for the both of us, I don't care."

He looked at me expectantly, because it was obvious I wasn't finished. I clutched my left elbow through the fabric of my sling, as if I was crossing my arms or hugging myself. "Naruto... I knew before he was even born that he would be special. He's going to be great. But his life will be very hard, difficult beyond my imagination. The villagers, they whisper, whisper about the 'Demon brat' and how it's all 'the Uzumaki boy's fault.' They say his name as if it's a curse or the name of something particularly disgusting they found on the bottom of their shoes. He's only a week old Sandaime-sama, what will they say when he's older!? They hate him and they will teach their children to despise him and I REFUSE TO LET HIM GO THROUGH THAT ALONE!" My emotions overwhelmed me, and I slammed my hand down onto Sarutobi's desk with an echoing slam. The office was silent as the grave, tense. Because even if his guards had no clue as to what we were saying, they could watch us.

Sarutobi was quiet for several minutes while I calmed my erratic breathing. I had gotten upset, too emotional. I probably had no chance now. I blew it. And suddenly, I wanted to go back to my bed and not the one I slept in at the Uchiha compound. I wanted to storm back to Minato and Kushina's house, back _home_ , and drop onto my futon and not move for a year. I wanted to go home to my bedroom that I would have shared with Naruto. The one where I was only supposed to stay in for a few weeks but never actually managed to leave because everyone was always making excuses for me to stay. I wanted my book collection and my notebooks full of translations I had made of english books, because I had planned on maybe investing in a typewriter and getting them published. I wanted my plush down comforter with it's non-offensive floral print that had surprised everyone when I had picked it out because they were sure I would go with the dark green one. I wanted to go back to Before, when everything had seemed a lot less complicated.

I wanted to give up. I admit it. I didn't want to do it anymore. For those few minutes while the Third Hokage thought over my words, I was really tempted to yell 'Screw it!' and just walk out the door. Out of the village. I wanted to wash my hands of this life so bad, for those few minutes. It was a moment of weakness, I know. But I'm only human, despite what my two lives say about me. And let me tell you something.

I am so glad I didn't.

* * *

I ran out of that office like a bat out of hell not two hours later, crying my eyes out. I had done it! I had actually convince Sarutobi to give me custody of Naruto! I laughed, bright and happy, as I dodged a pair of Chunin on their way to see the Hokage. I ignored his secretary's exclaims to slow down and the various shinobi's cries of alarm as I weaved throught the crowds on their way to the mission office. When I ran past the construction site where I had been helping Fugaku and saw him just leaving, even though most of the workers had left hours ago, I barreled into him at full speed. If he hadn't of been a shinobi, I'm sure my tackle would have knocked him into the ground.

Fugaku, despite what the fandom seems to think, is not a right bastard. Not at all, in fact. Sure, he acted like one, but that was how he was supposed to act, as head of the Uchiha clan. He loved his family very much, with all his heart. At this point, he only wanted what was best for both his family and village. He was just _very, very_ bad at showing it. But he did have the grace to actually be outwardly concerned when his psuedo-niece came slamming into his legs, crying. "Misaki, Misaki, what's wrong? Are you hurt?"

I shook my head, nuzzling into his pants. He picked me up, carefully, and settled me into his arms. "Then what's wrong Misaki?" he asked as we began to walk back to the compound. "If I don't know why you're crying by the time we get home, Mikoto will skin me alive."

I laughed and finally lifted my head to look in the face. I whispered to him, in a low voice. "Fugaku... I got it. I got _custody_." He looked confused for a few seconds before he began to chuckle.

"Well, Misaki-chan, I am telling you now. You have the full support of the Uchiha clan at you're disposal, should you ever need it. Mikoto wouldn't have it any other way, now would she?" I shook my head with a grin. No, no she wouldn't.

Fugaku set me down as we reached the main house. I grasped his hand and drug him inside. Simultaneously, we yelled out "TADAIMA!" and recieved an "Okaeri!" in return. Toeing off my geta, because what would I be wearing otherwise, and sticking my feet into the first pair of slippers I saw, I ran to Mikoto, who was puttering around the kitchen. I ignored the frustrated grumbling from the foyer. Apparently I had stolen Fugaku's favorite slippers in my haste to tell Mikoto. Oops. Sasuke was in his high chair, eagerly gulping down milk from his bottle. This was turning out to be an amazing day.

Mikoto laughed as I slammed face first into the fridge. She had waxed the floors today. "What's the rush Misa-chan?" I didn't answer her, having gotten distracted making silly faces at Sasuke through my pain.

Fugaku answered her question for me though. "Hokage-sama has decided to grant custody of Uzumaki Naruto to her. She just found out a little while ago."

If you had asked me whether Mikoto was upset about not getting custody of Naruto herself, I wouldn't have been able to answer. But she did burst into happy tears, grateful that _someone_ would be taking care of him. Of course, she also grabbed me by the shoulders and made me swear I would do everything I could to give her best friend's son a wonderful life. Of course, I swore on my own. Then she made _Fugaku_ swear he'd make sure I was at least partially taken care of. He informed that he'd already been planning on sending me a check monthly. Mikoto nodded as if she expected as much and returned to making dinner. Once it was finished, I was sent to fetch Itachi. I missed the look the husband and wife shared as I left.

Over dinner, I explained to the Uchiha Main Family exactly what would be happening in the next week or so. Starting tomorrow, a member of Anbu would escort me back to the Namikaze house, where I would proceed to pack my things, grab any furniture I'd need for my new apartment, including the supplies that had been pre-purchased before Naruto's arrival. Things like the crib, bottles, clothes, and assorted toys. I would be provided an apartment that was to be provided by the Hokage and sent a monthly check, required by the Konoha Orphan's Act. It would be a small, one room apartment with just enough room for my futon and Naruto's crib or futon when he was old enough to use one, a traditional table and two cushions, and a small dresser. It would cramped, yes, but it would work. I wasn't complaining though. I purposefully didn't mention that it the only apartment building that didn't immediately reject the Hokage when they saw who'd be living there.

I'll spare you the details of moving in, because it was, well... moving in? Well, there was also a lot of glares, sneers, harsh words, and _spit_ sent our way. Well, more like towards the sleeping, blonde babe on my back. Naruto was cute as a baby, with cheeks pink with life and a smile on his face always, even asleep. Too precious. But I got my books put away, placed Minato's old typewriter on the top shelf of the closet, and everything else was also tucked away.

It was interesting, trying to find a job with a baby tied to my back the next day. Okay, screw interesting. It was fucking pissing me off! I stormed from resturant to grocery store to market stall and was turned away before I can even open my mouth. Finally, I got pissed enough to get into a shouting match with one stall owner. The argument lasted about five minutes before someone had _the balls_ to try and take Naruto, who had been asleep through all of this, off my back. I didn't even hesitate to punch the woman in the face. Glass jaw, went down in one hit. I sneered at her and clutched Naruto's carrier closer to my chest. I only had one useable arm and they knew it. The mob of civilians began to corner me. Luckily, a certain infamous trio had spotted the commotion.

"What's going on?" rang off the walls of the alley I had been trapped in. I knew that voice, had heard it almost every day for a year. "Misaki-san? Is that you?"

I don't think I've ever been happier to see, well, _anyone_ my entire life. "Akimichi-sama! Help! They're trying to hurt me and my little brother!" The mob had been cowed almost as soon as Chouza's bulking frame, followed by Shikaku and Inoichi of course, had blocked the sun coming in from the end of the alley. It parted like the Red Sea for him, and he firmly, but gently, grasped my outreached arm and led me through the crowd. A few blocks away, he let go and turned to face me, eyes barely even glancing at Naruto, who was just now starting to wake up.

"Misaki, what was that about?" asked Chouza, frowning.

I looked at my feet. "I've been going around the village for the last couple hours, trying to see if anyone'd hire me. But they take one look at Naruto and kick me out! Most of the time, I don't even get a chance to open my mouth Akimichi-sama!" I explained the situation. He looked thoughtful for a moment.

"I thought you worked at the bakery run by my wife Misaki? As a bus girl, if I remember right. She told me she was even thinking about hiring you full time."

"I-I... I didn't want to effect your business Akimichi-sama. Your number of clients would decrease signifigantly if I kept working there."

Ino-Shika-Cho shared a look before bursting into laughter. "Troublesome," sighed Shikaku, "Girl, that bakery caters almost exclusively to shinobi."

Chouza nodded, a determined look on his kind face. "And if any of _them_ dislike you working there, I don't wish for them to return. You're a good worker Misaki-san. It's not too late to come back."

I stared at him in shock for several moments, before nodding eagerly. I tried not to cry. We talked a few more minutes, going over my schedule, before we bade eachother goodbye. I returned home with a smile on my face, even if Naruto began to cry as soon as I walked through the door.

That night, as I laid awake listening to Naruto breathe his little baby breaths, I smiled at the small, worn geta leaning against the threshold, waiting for when their new owner was big enough to wear them.

* * *

 **So what did you guys think? I think this is my longest chapter yet! And I'm actually really proud of this one, especially the first half, where's talking with Sarutobi.**

 **Have a good day and don't forget to review!**


	5. Birthdays and Revelations

**Siiiiigh. Hey guys, how's it going? Not too good for me, seeing as I had typed up about half of this chapter and then had to restart my computer. WITHOUT SAVING. So now I have to wait until my Adderall kicks in (good thing I don't have any morning classes tomorrow because I will NOT be sleeping tonight) to start rewriting this. And I even had up until Sasuke's first birthday too... Uggghhh. Hopefully, placebo effect will kick in soon. Oh, there it is. Ahhh, drugs, sweet drugs.**

 **To get a better idea of what Misaki and Naruto's apartment looks like, go google either 'Naruto's apartment' or 'Devil is a Part-timer apartment.' It looks just like that.**

 **Also, for the potential pairings, please remember that I am ONLY taking guys from before the Konoha 12 generation. I will not have Misaki be a pedophile, or even close to the word. NO UCHIHA FAMILY MEMBERS, PERIOD. She will have a purely platonic and familial relationship with any and all Uchiha she meets. I will, however, be willing to write an omake pairing her with, say, Tobirama or any other Kage, for shits and giggles.**

 **OKAY, SO POTENTIAL BOY TOYS LIST HAS GROWN: Iruka Umino, Kakashi Hatake (unlikely), Raido, Genma, Gai, and Tenzou/Yamato. One vote against Gai, so far. Don't blame you, I will admit it was more of an impulsive recommendation. Personality wise, I am leaning towards Genma at the moment, not gonna lie. It's just that the age gap between him and Misaki is even larger than the one between her and Kakashi. Seven years compared to four, but I think it might be worth it. From what I can tell of her personality, because not even I know it completely at this point, Misaki could use someone in her life that's not as gloomdoom or serious as some of the other potential guys. That's one of the reasons Gai popped up, he's cheerful and funny, which I've always liked in a guy myself. Genma is a wise-cracking, jovial, and according to the fandom, womanizing kinda dude. At the very least, I will make sure she is friends with him.**

 **BECAUSE THERE WILL BE MALE-FEMALE PLATONIC RELATIONSHIPS DAMMIT. THEY CAN HAPPEN. As you will see in this chapter and several future ones. There is actually one I specifically have in mind, except it's more like two guys because they sorta come as a package deal. I will write an Omake of choice for the first person to guess who the pair is, to be posted with their Introduction chapter. Unfortunately, they must have an account so that I can contact them outside of author's notes! No spoilers! However, there will be an Honorable Mentions!**

 **Also, I have decided to use Military Time for this story, simply because I think it fits with the setting more than a 12 hour clock. Don't stress over it guys, it probably won't come up enough for anyone to have a conniption. I know, the American using a 24 hour time system? How bizarre! Army JROTC, and over 200 years of military history on my dad's side alone. My father works on big rigs for a living. Where the hell do you think I learned to be so polite? ~... Pfft.**

 **Disclaimer: Still don't own my laptop or this library PC. So I certainly don't own Naruto.**

* * *

As Naruto grew, so did the hours I took at my various jobs. Five hours straight at the Akimichi bakery in the mornings, another four at the Yamanaka flower shop. Then, at night, I'd work several hours at the Inuzuka Veterinary Clinic. Luckily, my ototou was always either asleep or almost by the time that shift started. If he wasn't, playing with Kiba, who was adorable by the way, for a while sent both of them to dream land.

Over the next few years, I began to grow closer to clans I worked for, especially the Inuzuka. Much like their canine companions, they were blunt and honest, having never understood the concept of social niceties or its other trivialities. A member didn't like you? They let you fucking know. I have always appreciated such attitudes, so we got along swimmingly. It didn't hurt that they didn't mind Naruto, who I had to take with me everywhere, one little bit. Oh sure, the ninken were apprehensive of us in the beginning, especially the Haimaru brothers, triplets who accompanied Tsume's daughter Hana. One day, she had to leave them at the clinic while she attended the academy because they were due for vaccinations. I never really got the chance to interact with the animals anymore, due to my arm, but Tsume-san would sometimes let me carry things for her, like the tray of vaccines.

The second I walked in the room, alone because Tsume-san had forgotten something and Kuromaru had went with her, the three pups had started growling, raising their hackles. I had always been fond of dogs, and knew their reactions to different situations. And ninken were still dogs, no matter how 'civilized.' So I had slowly placed the tray of syringes on the counter, put my hand up in the universal gesture of surrender, and with a soft, but carrying voice, I called for the closest Inuzuka working that day. Which of course was Tsume-san, coming back down the hall. Kuromaru had almost immediately barreled into room and in front of me. Which was a good thing, because the lead Haimaru brother had been preparing to lunge.

Tsume poured me a cup of tea, green by the smell of it. Man, I missed Earl Grey. Maybe I could buy some black tea to experiment with when I had the money. Did they even have Bergamot oranges in the Naruto world? She leant back on the sofa after uncorking a bottle of Sake for herself. "So pup, according to Hana's pack, you smell like fox and bad chakra. They thought you were an enemy." We both glanced over at Kuromaru, who seemed to be too busy scolding the triplets to notice. Even if I couldn't understand him like Tsume seemed to, that much was obvious. "They don't seem to like you very much."

I raised an eyebrow over my cup. I couldn't help but be sarcastic. "Woooow, really? I have absolutely no idea why. Tell me Tsume-san, do you have any ideas?~" A feral grin broke across her face, both of us purposefully ignoring the sound of toddler babble coming from the playpen next to the couch, where Kiba and Naruto seemed to be fighting over some sort of toy. They were nine and six months old respectively, but that didn't seem to hinder their ability to argue.

"Sorry Misa-chan, can't help you there," was her response. We shared a conspiratory grin. I had grown fond of Tsume over the last few months. She was a gorgeous, independent woman who, dare I say it, didn't need no man. In fact, she had actually chased and maimed her now ex-husband the week before Kiba was born because she had caught him cheating. Kushina and Fugaku had looked mildly concerned after I had read the article in the newspaper and instantly declared her my idol. Minato had just looked amused.

"Hmmph. Well, they can just get over it, can't they? I'm not leaving one of the few steady jobs I have because a set of pups don't know how to tell friend from foe." Tsume didn't get a chance to respond as Naruto began to fuss, which lead Kiba to fussing right along with him. Naruto was teething, while also beginning to crawl. Of course, most days, he tended to scoot around on his bottom or even roll across the floor instead. But he was getting there. Because he was teething though, he was constantly uncomfortable, which meant I hadn't gotten a good night's sleep in several weeks. A tired Misaki is not a happy Misaki.

Over the months since Naruto's birth, I had developed what seemed to be super hearing. Tsume had explained that it was actually an instinctive chakra exercise that even most untrained civilian parents could do. It couldn't be performed consciously if you had never received training in chakra manipulation, which was only taught among clans or in the Academy. I admit, I was a little disappointed I would never be able to do it, but none-the-less, the boost was appreciated. Naruto could be a sneaky little shit, especially after he began to crawl.

One April morning, after an especially harrowing and exhausting night, a le Naruto, I woke up to a screaming alarm clock accompanied by a baby section. Baby sections in an orchestra are never appreciated, especially at five in the morning. I was running late for work, Naruto was being especially difficult, and there are only so many things you can do one handed, none of which are quickly tying knots or buttoning pants. I snapped. Not at Naruto, oh no. I'd never hit a baby. I wasn't Kana. Growing frustrated with the light sweater I had spent the last five minutes trying to pull over Naruto's head, I stormed across the apartment and onto the miniscule balcony to yell at the Anbu I _knew_ were there.

"Would one of you Kunai-brains come and help me before I have an aneurysm!? If I'm late one more time, Chouza-sama will skin me alive!" I shook the slip of fabric at the trees before going back inside, completely ignoring the startled silence outside. Not even the birds were chirping. I continued to dress and kept my back to the sliding glass leading to the balcony, not even twitching as the sound of footsteps on cheap, shitty hardwood reached my chakra-enhanced ears. I went about packing the baby bag and reheating Naruto's breakfast, all while trying not grin because of the baby giggles and muffled, frustrated cursing behind me. After finally managing to get dressed and having put on my sling, I turned around to find the door gliding shut and latching with a low ' _click_ ,' no Anbu in sight. Naruto was dressed in his insulated frog onesie, ready for the cool morning air, and scooting towards me, grabby hands activated. I couldn't help but smile back, before depositing him in his carrier and heading out the door. Surprisingly, I made it on time.

Owl sighed, but let out a snort, muffled by their mask, as their partner complained for the third time in just as many minutes. Snake had lost the sudden game of Janken*, and thus had to go help dress the brat. Really, it wasn't that big of a deal. Sure, they could have just ignored her demands, but after a half year of protecting Kishimot Misaki and Uzumaki Naruto, most of Anbu had built a grudging respect for the ten year old. There were some adults who couldn't manage what she did. Case in point, Snake.

"She has to deal with that every morning? I couldn't do it Owl, I swear. I think I'd go insane." repeated Snake, a whine in their voice. "I've seen steel beams more malleable than that kid's arms. And she actually manages to be on time almost every day?" Snake was new to the protection detail, it being their first day on the job, so didn't really understand what the big deal was until about five minutes ago.

Owl shook their head. "And every night, and all through the day as well. All while only using one hand too. While working three jobs." Snake shuddered, causing Owl to chuckle once more. "And unlike a certain captain, she actually knows how to manage her time."

"Oh, you mean Dog-taicho? Where've they been anyway? Haven't seen 'em around HQ lately."

Owl cocked their head, looking much like their animal namesake, in a thinking pose. "I believe they were assigned a long term mission, right after the Kyuubi attack, along with Woodpecker*. Not supposed to be back for a few more months, at least."

"Ah... oh look she's arrived at the bakery. Time to settle in for a day jam-packed with boredo-, I mean, guarding two very important figures."

"..."

"... Owl?"

"Yes Snake?"

"... Remind me to NEVER have kids."

"Of course Snake."

* * *

Eventually, July arrived, which meant that I had a fuck ton, okay more like two but whatever, of birthday parties to attend. None of which were my own, because I absolutely despise parties. Oh, I didn't mind a nice dinner or outing with some close friends or family members, but a large party was always so exhausting. I wanted to have fun on my birthday, not put on an act. Unfortunately, there are no amusement parks in the Naruto world, which had always been my go-to celebration for 'important' birthdays…. I really miss rollercoasters.

For Kiba's birthday, Tsume asked if I could make some of the desserts that had actually gotten me promoted to kitchen assistant at the bakery. They were only half-remembered Western-style cakes and sweets, but had been gaining popularity anyway. Especially the three-layered lemon cake with lemon curd filling. It didn't seem to matter all that much to Kiba what flavor his cake was, so for the assorted babies and toddlers, I just made carrot cupcakes. For the adults, mostly Inuzuka of course, I made a dog bone shaped chocolate cake with white icing. They found it amusing. But it was even funnier when Kiba fell asleep and landed face first on his cupcake. Naruto, being around ten months old, followed shortly. We all had a good laugh.

Then it was my turn to be officially one year older. Eleven is not an exciting age. All three of my employers had informed me the day before that I should not, would not bother showing up for work on my birthday because they would immediately send me right back out the door. From Akimichi Chomei-senpai, lord of the sweets at the bakery and the person I had begun to follow around as his assistant, had baked me a cake. Chocolate, with lemon curd filling, and dark chocolate icing sprinkled with sea salt. Yuuuum. Chomei was a large man, being an Akimichi, and Chouza-sama's cousin. He took his sweets seriously and was a hard task-master, but I was fond of him anyway. Chomei was very much that crotchety old man that everyone liked, despite his best intentions. Chouza-sama and his wife gave me a bonus, and even a raise!

From the Yamanaka, I also received a bonus, plus a bouquet of flowers. Baby's breath for festivity, delphinium for my birth month and boldness, daffodil for chivalry, daisies for innocence, freesia for spirit, gladiolus for strength of character, and hydrangea for perseverance. A strange, but beautiful bouquet, bright and colorful. They had placed it in a simple, white ceramic vase, as to not distract from its beauty. Naruto tried to eat a daisy. He didn't like it, much to a baby Ino's delight.

The Inuzuka didn't really give me anything except for a bonus, but I didn't mind. Yes, I was liked and one of the few outsiders to work in the Clinic, but like dogs, the family as a whole took a while to be trusting. However, Tsume personally gave me a gorgeous scarf, a deep forest green with gold edging, already cut and knotted to act as a sling for my left arm. My old, standard sling had been wearing thin after a whole two years of daily use, so it was greatly appreciated. The scarves were also infinitely more comfortable. I strongly suspected it wasn't her doing, but she wasn't the best at domestic things anyway. The Inuzuka clan head had actually gotten me several of them. The one for daily use was a plain, natural burlap, which was durable and not that hard to clean. The other was white silk to wear only when I dressed up or wore kimono. Which wouldn't be very soon, if I had anything to say about it.

Fugaku was on a mission the day I turned eleven, but would return by the time Sasuke's first birthday came around, so my birthday dinner with the Uchiha family was postponed until then. That didn't stop Mikoto and Itachi, plus Sasu-chan, from popping up at my apartment with a homemade meal and presents. There was of course the monthly check, which certainly helped pay the bills, plus a bonus for me to use for whatever I wanted. The bonuses from work, I used to finally buy a washing machine so I wouldn't have to go across the village to do laundry. Any extra money was put into a savings account or used to invest in my places of employment. I planned on eventually buying a house and paying with cash, so I wouldn't have a mortgage. Luckily, Naruto's years at the academy would be covered by the Third. Otherwise, I wouldn't be able to afford it.

I blinked in confusion at the package on the low table in the center of the room, Mikoto and Itachi looking over my shoulder or around me to see what had made me pause. "There… is a package on my table."

The look on six year old Itachi's face clearly said 'Duh, stupid.' "Yes, there does appear to be."

"I have no idea who it's from…. Mikoto-obasan, can you please check it out?"

Mikoto frowned, marring her pretty face and stepped inside, with us behind her. She spent several minutes examining it, with both her sharingan, since when did she have that, and several other mystery ninja things. I really should have known she had the sharingan. She had been a jounin before retiring. "There doesn't seem to be anything amiss. Is it okay if I open it for you though, Misaki-chan?"

"Go for it." She opened it quickly, jumping back in case of an explosion or something similar. When nothing happened for several moments, the house-wife relaxed minutely before dumping out the contents. It was several packages of thick paper, along with rolls of typewriter ink ribbons, and a cleaning/repair kit. Hesitantly, I crossed the room, leaving both Naruto and Sasuke at the door with Itachi, and caught the note fluttering to the floor.

' _Kishimoto Misaki,_

 _There are quite a few of us who would like to wish you a happy birthday. Use the supplies well and we look forward to reading your published works instead of just your manuscripts. It would be most unfortunate for such creative skills to go unnoticed. And remember, you have quite a few fans already, so don't get too discouraged either._

 _Love,_

 _The Kunai-brains'_

I couldn't stop my snort of amusement or my small smile as I read the note. Damn sneaky Anbu, reading my translations. I appreciated the gift though, because I had run out of ink and paper several weeks ago, not to mention the roller was jammed. The kit would especially come in handy in fixing that little problem.

"It's all good Mikoto-obasan. Just a gift from some spectacularly sneaky ninja." She raised an eyebrow, silently questioning, but I answered only with a secretive smile. I clapped my hands. "All right! Who's hungry?!" Naruto gave quite the adorable responding squeal, but Sasuke's very obvious 'what the fuck' look in response was the thing that got us all laughing, or chuckling in Itachi's case. We all sat down to eat the delicious bento Mikoto had made.

A few hours later, after the three Uchiha had left, I began to sort through the gifts I had received. The flowers had been placed on the table, the scarves in the dresser, and the cake, what few leftover slices were left, in the fridge. I put the writing supplies up in the closet, with the typewriter and notebooks. I began folding the three samue, traditional working clothes, mizuya-gi, a smock/apron worn while cleaning, and the new everyday outfit I had received from the Uchiha family. My new geta and ninja shoes were already by the door. The outfit consisted of a pair of green cargo pants, to be wrapped with bandages around the ankles, and two black crop tops, one sleeveless, the other long-sleeved. I liked it a lot, actually.

About two weeks later, I found myself standing outside the Uchiha home, trying to somehow balance my arm full of baby long enough to either kick or ring the doorbell with my foot. This took several minutes, but I had just managed it when I heard the door open, and an amused Itachi walked out.

"Having trouble Misaki-nee?" He quirked an eyebrow.

I growled at him, not seriously though. "Oh shut up Itachi." I went inside the house and immediately plopped Naruto, already trying to escape, on the step. It didn't take him long to crawl away, towards the sound of other children playing. I wasn't upset about coming on Sasuke's birthday. Dinner tonight was for me, so Sasuke got his celebration during the day, simple as that. As soon as I had toed off my geta and put on some slippers, I followed after Itachi, who was vainly trying to catch Naruto. I pulled him into a hug after he had managed to herd the baby, almost toddler now, into the living room with the rest of the babies. Naruto had seen Sasuke and made a bee line towards him. "How've you been Ita-chan? Anything new going on?" I murmured into his hair.

He hugged me back. He had apparently decided to ignore the 'Ita-chan' for now. "I will be starting the academy this year."

"Are you excited?" I released the six year old to look him in the eyes, something I wouldn't be able to do without hesitation in two years.

He cocked his head, contemplating my question. "I suppose so. I do enjoy learning new things." I laughed, before ruffling his hair and poking him in the forehead, like he would eventually do to Sasuke.

"Well, just try your best okay? But don't let anyone push you around or make you do anything you don't want to, okay? You're gonna be great, I know it." He nodded and I kissed him on the cheek, causing a look of disgust to cross his face. Prodigy or not, Itachi was still six.

"Is that the wonderful voice of my favorite niece/daughter I never had I hear?~" came Mikoto's voice from somewhere in the house. Probably the kitchen, if the sound of frying meat was any indication.

I grinned at Itachi before I replied. He rolled his eyes and covered his ears, before walking off. "TADAIMAAAA!~"

There was the unmistakable sound of someone quickly standing from the seiza position, not a pretty noise by the way, and a shoji door gliding open on well-oiled rollers. Some quick, urgent footsteps down the hall.

"Okaeri Misa-chan," said Fugaku from behind me. I turned and took in his appearance. You couldn't even tell he had rushed from across the house to come greet me, if you ignored the stiffness of walking and slight wrinkles in his yukata. He wasn't even breathing hard. Otherwise, he hadn't changed much at all in the long months it had been since I had seen him last. But I didn't care about that. He was _there._ Fugaku let out a low ' _oof_ ' as I slammed into him, eyes watering and the biggest grin on my face. I nuzzled my face into the soft fabric of his yukata and felt his arms wrap around me. Out of all the adult Uchiha I had met, it was probably Fugaku I loved the most. I'd be destroyed when the Massacre happened. I still hadn't figured out a way to stop it. I know I shouldn't get so close to the Uchiha, but I couldn't help it.

We stood like that for what could have been only minutes or even hours before I finally had the energy to say something. "Fugaku-oji, Mikoto-oba must have not seen your clothes yet, because there is no other way you've been getting away with wearing a plaid yukata at a party." He snorted.

"Shhh, maybe if you don't mention it, she won't notice." I finally let go of him enough to let him see the disbelieving expression on my face. The Clan Head allowed a small smirk onto his face. "No go huh?"

I shook my head as we began to head down the hall, me clutching his left hand with my right. "No go." He let loose a very amusing, put upon sigh.

"Well, I'm not changing until she gives me _The Look_. Until then, don't say a-" Fugaku didn't get to finish as an enraged scream rang through the house, in the direction of the living room. "WHAT THE HELL IS THAT DEMON BRAT DOING IN HERE!? GET IT OUT!" An echoing slap. Shocked silence. A child began to wail. And not just any child either. _Naruto_. There was suddenly a loud roaring in my ears, and fire in my skin. I was no longer a match. I was a wild fire.

Fugaku reached the living room first, of course, promising Death on whoever had just slapped Naruto. He might have gotten there first, but I was the one who spotted her. Standing over Naruto's wailing, shaking form, with a smug grin on her face. And she wasn't the only one either. Half of the adults, of which there were no Uchiha, had the same hateful expression plastered on their faces. Itachi was frozen in shock, eyes wide. But that's when I stopped really paying attention.

With a scream of fury loud enough to rival a banshee, I lunged at the woman, no, the _monster_ who had dared to hurt Naruto. I was sick of seeing people with faces like hers, uncaring monsters who willingly and happily hurt children. Their faces flashed before my eyes as I hit her and kicked her, not hearing, not caring about the screams for me to stop. My _mother_ Kana, that Iwa nin who stabbed me and left me a cripple, the blank, mysterious faces of all those who had hit and run an innocent child just trying to cross the street. _Wrong, wrong, why is this world so fucking wrong!?_ Then the faces of the victims. The Boy in the Box, found in Philadelphia, 1957. His identity was still unknown when I died the first time. Casey Brewer, his face remembered in mid-flinch, still not used to positive human contact. Lila Collins, her bloated body and sightless eyes found floating face down in the Mississippi River, raped then drowned by her insane uncle. A nameless teenage mother and her little girl, found frozen to death under a bridge in New York City on a cold January morning.

Finally, Fugaku managed to pull me off of the woman, who was nearly unconscious, and across the room from her. But not without one last final scream of " _YOU'RE JUST LUCKY I'M NOT WEARING MY TOOLBELT YOU FUCKING BITCH! MAYBE A MALLET TO THE FACE IS WHAT YOU REALLY DESERVE!"_ I didn't, couldn't hear what Fugaku was saying, but he was using his cold, emotionless Uchiha voice, so it wasn't good. I was a match once more, but that roaring was still there, like the ever constant rumbling of magma underneath a volcano. People screamed as two Anbu operatives body-flickered into the room, obviously with Fugaku's permission, and picked up the woman. One paused and cocked their head at me, looking quite a bit like an owl, before nodding to Fugaku and disappearing along with their partner.

"-aki! -isaki! Misaki!" I blinked owlishly and turned toward Itachi, who was holding out what looked to be a damp rag. He had a first aid kit in his other hand. I looked at him in obvious confusion. He rolled his eyes. "Your knuckles are bleeding. They need to be cleaned or the cuts will get infected." I still didn't feel like talking, so I just wordlessly held out my fist. It's not like I could clean it anyway. Next to me, Fugaku sighed deeply and ran his hand over his face. I looked at him. I wouldn't apologize for the mess I made or what this incident would probably do to the Uchiha Clan's reputation. What was most likely an important lady getting attacked for 'no reason' by the Fox Brat's guardian while attending the Second Son's First Birthday Party? Sounded like headlines right there. I didn't feel guilty though, and I've never seen the point in apologizing unless you were legitimately sorry. It was a waste of time.

Fugaku's eyes turned to steel and he slowly stood to face the crowd, who had been conversing amongst themselves. They quieted. The clan head did not raise his voice, and it was as soft as a feather, like he wasn't even upset. But the guests looked afraid anyway. It might have been the Killer Intent he was leaking. "If there are anymore of you who feel the same for Uzumaki Naruto as that woman, or have even the slightest of negative emotions involving him, I ask that you leave now and take your children with you. I will not have such people attending my son's birthday party. Uzumaki Naruto is a guest and so is his guardian." At this, he gestured to me. Eyes flickered toward me in fear. Apparently, I had made an impression. "If you think you can weasel your way into staying by using your status, know that Naruto and Misaki have been on the guest list far longer than _any_ of you have, and are far more important to me than having disrespectful scum like you support the Uchiha clan any longer. If you brought gifts, those will be returned to you as well. If there are a few of you who can actually keep themselves neutral towards my guests, or are actually grateful for the _sacrifices made to keep you alive_ , you may stay." And with that, he stalked out of the room.

Itachi having finished bandaging my hand during his father's speech, I stood and wordlessly went to Naruto. The crowd of guests parted like the Red Sea. He was still whimpering on the floor, though he was also being contained a bear hug by Sasuke. When he saw me coming, the blonde smiled through his pain _like he would have to do when he was older dammit_ and reached for me. I smiled back and picked him up, allowing Itachi to handle his little brother. When we had turned around to follow Fugaku, a good fourth of the guests had left with their children, while even more were on their way out the door. Itachi led me by my left hand, the scarf must have come undone during the tussle, into and down the hallway, than out the backdoor. And there was Fugaku, rubbing his temples to try and prevent a headache. It didn't look as if he was being particularly successful.

A flash of guilt rushed through me, but I squashed it. I was not sorry for beating up that horrible woman, I refused to. She deserved everything I gave to her. Fugaku seemed to be able to read my mind, because he suddenly chuckled before gesturing for us both to sit next to him. I sat with Naruto, who didn't seem eager to squirrel off for once, on my lap and leaned into him. Itachi copied me on his other side. We were all very quiet for a while, before I finally spoke up.

"I'm not gonna apologize Fugaku-oji. I don't say sorry 'less I mean it."

He huffed. "I wasn't expecting you to. In fact, I don't even want you to, Misaki-chan."

I looked up at him, trying to gauge his emotions, but his face might as well have been painted on. "I am sorry about causing you what's probably a whole lotta trouble though. Those looked like some very important people Oji-san."

He nodded. "They were, supposedly. But I am beginning to realize something, the longer this night goes on…." I furrowed my brow in confusion, but the clan head just continued to stare at the sunset. I listened for movement in the house. There was Mikoto, who seemed as if she was at the door, seeing people off, but not even hinting she was sorry to see them go. So, had all the guests left then? The whole village would know by morning.

It wasn't long before Mikoto herself joined us, not looking the least bit upset about the whole situation. She actually looked rather maniacally pleased, especially with me, seeing as she patted my on the head on her way past, to sit next to Itachi. She'd probably wanted to do that to quite a few people since Naruto's birth and the subsequent Kyuubi attack but couldn't because it would cause the clan to lose face. Sometimes being so influential was a pain in the ass.

"Otou-sama, what is on your mind? You have been very quiet." It looks like Itachi broke first.

"… I am beginning to realize that the only people who should be important enough to affect how I treat my family should be my family. Not people who are so set in their ways, they cannot see what some innocent person has to go through just to allow them to keep living their comfortable lives." His voice seemed to take on a determined tone as he turned to me. "Over the last few months, the other major clans have begun to seclude us, sometimes not even bothering to send an invitation, at what should be peaceful and joyful events. But we as a clan are only met with scorn, or hostility. I had not realized until now why they had been doing so. Many of the Clan Elders are calling it distrust or bitterness because of how strong the Uchiha are, but that never sat right with me."

Now I was even more confused. "So why do you think the other clans don't like you anymore Oji-san?"

Fugaku sighed. "The other major clans have announced either their neutrality or their support of you and Naruto. The Hyuuga and Aburame could care less for instance, but the Inuzuka and Ino-Shika-Cho have all voiced their undying support. At least one of the reasons for their continued hostility is because the Uchiha have not declared their intentions yet. The only other clans who haven't, their opinons are obvious and extremely negative."

"So they assume you feel the same way?"

"Yes, I believe so. I do not blame them. They do not know of the checks we send you monthly, because they are private and not actually from the Clan accounts. We ask for donations." He paused, before continuing. "The Uchiha must make an official statement of our support, or I fear the distance between us and the rest of the village will only grow wider."

I stared at Fugaku in wonder. Was this really one of the reasons behind the Clan's continued seclusion? Fugaku being stubborn? And if I had decided not to come today, he would have continued being stubborn?! I spoke my next words straight from the heart and looked him dead in the eye. "Fugaku-oji, you're a _moron_."

Mikoto burst out laughing, and it seemed as if the tension just melted out of the area. It took her several minutes to stop laughing. When she finally did, she exclaimed, "Raise your hand if you want take out!"

Even the baby's hands went up.

* * *

 **Okay, so I hope you enjoyed! This is my longest chapter yet!**

 **Janken= Pretty much Japanese Rock-Paper-Scissors.**

 **Woodpecker= Dog shouldn't be too hard to guess, but if someone guesses who Woodpecker is and they're right, they get internet cupcakes!**


	6. Time Flies

**Hey guys! Yay, another update! I can't help it, I just love writing for this story. However, as you can see, I have temporarily, for now at least, changed the genre from Humor to Family. Because while Misaki is sassy and has a mouth on her, I have realized that this story has, as one wonderful reviewer mentioned, been pulling more heart strings than it's been busting guts. Humor has never been one of my strong points, and most of my casual acquaintances from college have never heard my scathing, but sarcastic remarks, simply because I have at least enough social awareness to know that those should be attempted among good friends only, less I contract foot-in-mouth disease. Unfortunately, it is genetic in my family.**

 **I will be skipping a large amount of time in this chapter.**

 **I just realized that I never gave y'all a hint when it came to guessing who Woodpecker is, and I'm sorry about that. I had about five seconds left to finish the chapter before having to go meet my dad to be picked up. WOODPECKER IS NOT YAMATO. YAMATO'S ANBU NAME IS BEAVER. I chose beaver because the Narutowiki says he has a love for architecture, so I figured it was fitting. Dog is obviously Kakashi though. I will say that Woodpecker's real name has been mentioned several times in both my author's notes AND in the reviews. Also, Woodpecker is a reference to something said mysterious person always has on hand while off duty or not performing Anbu stuff. It's not a physical attribute, more like an accessory, but is always associated with him anyway. There, you now have your hint.**

 **The Boy Toys List has yet to grow. Gai has been voted against once more. I'll just take him off the list. *scratches off his name* So now we have: Umino Iruka, Shiranui Genma, Raido, Hatake Kakashi, and Yamato. I'd like to point out that while I may decide the final couple, I won't stop you from shipping Misaki with ANYONE else. So those who want her with Kakashi, ship it to your heart's content. Hell, ship her with Yagura for all I care.**

 **Romance will NOT play a big part in this story guys. I just like getting shit like this out of the way. At most, there will be only one or two chapters centered completely around the romance aspect. The only 'romance' I have ever written is the one between Kathy and Ultra Magnus in Rules of Nest, and that's mostly off screen. So don't worry 'bout it.**

 **No one has yet to even mention who the potential pair Misaki will have regular, friendly interactions with. Regular, as in daily because they will be living with her and Naruto, interactions. The hint for them is that they're very close, almost like Father and son. There, that should do it. REMEMBER THAT THERE IS A PRIZE FOR THE FIRST REGISTERED REVIEWER TO GUESS WHO THEY ARE.**

 **Disclaimer: I do not own my family's main PC nor do I own Naruto. However, I do own the coffee cup I am drinking from. It was a Christmas present.**

* * *

Naruto and I ended up staying the night at the Uchiha house after a nutritious dinner of take-out stir-fry and microwaved eggrolls. I even saw Itachi 'sneaking' small bits of his vegetables and crushed steak to the babies, much to their delight. Mikoto, Fugaku, and I all shared an eye roll, but let him get away with it. Itachi hated steak, and had in fact ordered shrimp for his meal, but they had gotten it wrong. We made him eat it anyway, too tired to fight with the restaurant. He pouted of course, in that stoic, Itachi way of his.

The Uchiha main house was not as big as you'd think it would be. In fact, it wasn't much bigger than the house I used to live in with Naruto's parents. Yes, it was a strange mix between 'traditional' and this world's version of 'modern' but that didn't make it very large. It only had like five bedrooms, one of which was Fugaku's office and the other was used for storage. So there was the master bedroom, than Itachi's room, than Sasuke's. Naruto ended up bunking with Sasuke in his crib for the night, while I shared a bed with Itachi. Mikoto had offered to get out a futon for me, but I was sick of sleeping on the damn things. Yes, they were ridiculously comfortable, especially the one I have back at the apartment and no I am not biased, but Itachi's bed was huge, big enough to fit two grown men laying side by side. I know this because I had seen Fugaku and Minato do it when we had been visiting. Their friendship was a lot like Sasuke and Naruto's would be, best friends even if they acted like they hated each other.

We left late the next morning, all five of us having slept in and had a lazy Sunday morning. It was…. nice, to spend time like that with the Uchiha family. I often didn't get to have downtime, not in the last nine, almost ten months. Pausing to readjust Naruto's carrier, I allowed myself a small smirk, not un-Uchiha like. I could see myself in a few years, regaling Team 7 with the story of Sasuke's first birthday, with Sasuke trying not to be embarrassed in the corner of course, already. I'm sure Kakashi would enjoy it, at least. He should have the pole out of his ass enough by then to at least chuckle. Why yes, I am quite petty enough to still be angry with him after two years, why do you ask? Much less so by now, yes, but still angry. I finished fiddling with Naruto's carrier and continued my way down the street, now consciously enhancing my hearing to hear the gossip of the various civilians going down Market Street. I hadn't told anyone I had figured it out, and I wasn't planning to either. I'd like to claim that I'd figured it out all by myself, really I would. But in all honesty, an Inuzuka brat just graduated from the academy a few months ago and he decided to give out his old books to people who needed them. Inuzuka do not throw away anything EVER, so he still had his old Beginner's Chakra Control text book. Of course I grabbed it, and I'm pretty sure Tsume saw me. I told her it was for Naruto when he entered the academy, but I don't think she believed me. She did give me some tips though, 'for Naru-chan of course.' That woman is too smart for her own good. Hana was smart too. So why the hell did said intelligence skip Kiba?

"-she is! The _Akuma no gādian_ *! Did you hear what she did at that party the Uchiha held for their second son's birthday yesterday?"

"No, I didn't! What did she do?"

"I heard she broke into the house and set the demon onto the other children there, before attacking one of the guests for no reason!"

"Wha-?"

"That's not right. I heard that she was invited by the Uchiha only so they could stay in her, and thus the fox brat's, good graces. But she's been so poisoned by his evil chakra, she's gone insane! So she took out a butcher knife out of her… you know where… and tried to stab poor Uchiha Itachi. He must be so traumatized!"

"Poor Itachi-kun!"

"I know! Hey, hasn't she done something like that before?"

"Yeah, she beat in the heads of some innocent genin just a few years ago, for no reason! They said they had just been standing there, talking to a few girls, when she came out of nowhere and beat them up!"

"Wow, she really is insane….. I-Isn't that her, coming up the road now?"

"Oh shit. Be quiet, she might not notice us."

I heard all that and more on my walk home that day. I didn't mind though. Some of the gossip was actually rather hilarious. And from the looks on the faces of several shinobi I passed and waved to on the street, they obviously agreed. Oh, it was obvious they wanted to know what actually went down and I answered the questions of the various ninja that actually bothered to ask. But otherwise, I didn't mention it. I was sure that the true story would be out among the people who actually mattered by the evening. I was just passing a teashop, where Anko's unmistakeable laughter could be heard half a block away, and cursing how my apartment was on the other side of the village when an Anbu operative dropped to a crouch in front of me. It was one of the pair who had taken the woman away, presumably to the hospital. He cocked his head at me. Oh yeah, definitely.

I raised an eyebrow but kept walking. I was too used to seeing even Fugaku, when he felt like showing off of course, do that, I didn't even flinch. He fell into step with me shortly, and it was quiet for several minutes. "So whatcha want Kunai-brain?" There was the distinct sound of a startled snort being strangled in its crib. He thought my nickname for Anbu was amusing, did he?

He didn't answer my question though, only kept walking along with me. Occasionally, a civilian would glance at us and either smirk triumphantly or run away. Whether they ran screaming depended on how straight-backed my masked companion decided to walk. We were passing Ichiraku's before I realized that yes, his shoulders were shaking, as if he was trying to keep from laughing. Glad to know even Anbu have a sense of humor.

"Seriously though, are you supposed to be following me out in the open like this? Aren't you supposed to stalk me from the trees or some shit?"

I almost opened my mouth to question him again, but he finally deemed my questions suitable enough to answer. Took him long enough, the bastard. "Hokage-sama has been informed of the Incident and expressed a concern over the possible backlash that might stem from the rumors. He is of the opinion that if you are seen with an obvious protection detail, such as a member of the Anbu, possible attackers might hesitate to do so." He was silent for a moment before continuing. "I have been assigned as a member of the first shift, and the only one to actually be out in the open."

I nodded and mulled over his explanation. It made sense, I suppose. I had caused an Incident, with a capital I, and was already disliked by most of the village, so this would not endear anyone of the civilian population to me. The shinobi could care less for the most part, but there were some exceptions ( _coughcoughMizukicough_ ), but most were neutral. Shinobi didn't care for holding grudges, at least not without good reason. They did have a good reason to be resentful of Naruto, most definitely, but even the most mediocre Genin knew the basics of sealing. The container was not the weapon, end of story. And if someone brought up the demon, and they should know better, it was beaten into their heads. I had seen it happen many a time walking down the street. Jōnin sensei whacking their student, sometimes all three, for being stupid upside the head was a common sight, even before the Kyuubi attack.

"So~…. What's your name?" I asked, very curious. He stiffened, almost unnoticeably, and his voice was hard and clipped, almost disapproving, when he replied.

"Classified," was his short response before he sped up slightly, leaving me in the dust with my short legs and heavy, sleeping toddler as deadweight. I blinked up at him, brow furrowed in confusion. Huh? All I wanted was to know his na-…. _Ohhhh._ Yeah, sometimes I really can be just that dumb. It's a personal failing I try to ignore. Truth be told, I had almost forgotten that the people under the animal masks were just that. People, who had names and personalities, just like everyone else. I just wanted to know what his animal designation was. Hello, foot-in-mouth disease, we meet again. Long time no see. I didn't miss you one fucking bit.

Flailing my arm in mild panic, but mostly embarrassment because now he probably _hated_ me, Anbu despised getting asked what their real names were, I caught up to him. "I didn't mean it like that! I swear I didn't! I just wanted to know what animal you are! I swear, I would never ask for your real name, not even if my life depended on it! ... Okay, _maybe_ I would, but any other time I would never even consider it." What? I'm not prone to lying to myself or other people when it comes to events where an important choice had to be made. I would do what I had to if either my life or the lives of my precious people were on the line. Oh, I'd feel incredibly guilty later, no doubt, but still.

He slowed down after I had explained myself, and the mild tension in his back dissipated somewhat. But it wasn't until we had reached the apartment and I had unlocked the door did he speak again. His voice still sounded like he was irritated, but not nearly as angry as before.

"Owl. My designation is Owl." He headed inside. I'm pretty sure the smile I made in response was so bright, Mist could have used my skull as a lighthouse….. Wow, that sounded really weird. But it was totally something they would do if they thought they could get away with it. I giggled excitedly and followed him inside.

* * *

Things stayed mostly the same over the following months. Owl followed me around the village during the day, whistling while I worked. And he actually did whistle, too low for anyone not a tracker or me, to hear, the bastard. He's lucky I didn't tear off his mask and beat him with it. We became good friends over time, even if he couldn't tell me any specific details about himself, like his real name or appearance. I didn't mind though, because I still knew a lot about him. I learned that his habit of cocking his head when thinking or when he found something particularly amusing wasn't a habit he developed after he received his mask, but was why he was called Owl in the first place. I learned that he had once been dared to turn his head as much as he possibly could and almost broke his neck in the process. But it was worth it, according to him, because hey, he got 2,000 ryō* out the deal. I promptly told him he was an idiot, especially since the event occurred less than a month before he was assigned to guard me. It's sad when an eleven year old is more intelligent than a grown man, no matter her mental maturity. Of course, in typical Owl fashion, he just cocked his head at me.

I'll just… skip over Naruto's first birthday for now. It… It wasn't pleasant. At all. We had to have a full team of Anbu following us in the open, with another hiding in the shadows. Not even the Uchiha compound was safe on Naruto's birthday. I think Owl was afraid I'd absorbed his hand into my arm by the time we reached the Hokage Tower, with how tightly I'd been holding it. Naruto was still too young to safely use the body flicker. Next year, he wouldn't be and I fully planned on using that to my advantage. I don't think I've seen anyone, certainly not a whole crowd of anyones, volunteer so quickly.

Otherwise, the rest of the year, and the first half of the next, was rather uneventful, almost ridiculously so. Naruto began learning how to talk and often instigated elaborate and supposedly meaningful conversations with Sasuke-chan, Ino, Kiba, and Choji, or any of the other babes whose parents allowed their children near him. But it was still mostly gibberish. He also developed the habit of impromptu games of tag with Sasuke-chan when the both of them could actually walk enough to not fall over every thirty seconds. Itachi graduated from the Academy in under a year and we had a private celebratory dinner for him. Mikoto and Fugaku didn't even blink when I eventually got fed up, moved him to the couch and proceeded to sit on the poor seven year old until he promised not to push himself too hard, or I'd pop his head like a grape. Fugaku stopped laughing when he was informed I'd do the very same if he pushed either of his sons too hard, and realized I was completely serious. Especially after I told him not to let the Clan Elders get their shriveled old paws into them. The next day was the Graduation Ceremony. As the only (living) loud member of the Uchiha clan, despite not actually being an Uchiha at all, I, along with Naru-chan, was his designated cheering squad. Mikoto and Fugaku, plus various other Uchiha, just clapped politely.

I turned twelve, Fugaku was actually here, and we ate at Ichiraku's as a quiet, but somehow still rambunctious family. The stares from very confused passerby were a riot that reduced almost all of us to giggles. The end, because not much else had changed from the year before. I got virtually the same gifts from my various employers. I added my bonus money into my (happily) growing savings account. If things stayed the same pace, I could probably, just barely, buy a house by Naruto's second year in the Academy. I would be able to get all of his parent's things out of storage so he could see and use the same things they had. That is what excited me the most.

There weren't nearly as many people at Sasuke's second birthday party that year. In fact, all the non-Uchiha guests were the main families from the other major clans. I didn't get to speak much with them other than a quick greeting before I had to continue my pursuit of various ankle-biters of the toddling age. But pretty much all of the future Konoha 12 was there, except for Sakura, Tenten, and Lee. I should know, I had to chase after all of them. Even Neji, who wasn't a little asshole yet because Hizashi wasn't due to die for another year at least, and Hinata were allowed to play, even if it wasn't especially loud. Obviously, Hiashi wasn't so anal about clan traditions as much as the fandom thought, if he let his _technically_ Branch-family brother and nephew attend such a 'high-profile' event, as I heard some women at the market call it. It was a two year old's birthday party for fuck's sake, not a ball held by the Daimyo.

It was at this party, I was offered a job. A full time, high paying, but difficult job. One that paid more than all of my part time jobs combined. Yoshino, Shikamaru's mother, had originally said it as a joke after she had witnessed my miraculous motivation of her son, enough that he actually got off his lazy butt and went to play 'Ninja' with the other kids. I barely even head her because I was in my Zone. Children had always been my life, my sole purpose before I was shot was to make the world a better place for them. Weeds will strangle a garden and not allow it to grow, but if you remove that suffocating presence, the garden will flourish. Children were much the same. Taking care of Naruto was often exhilarating, and not without reward. He certainly had energy enough to make it _seem_ as if I was a kindergarten teacher again, stuffed into a classroom full of some of the rowdiest kids known to man. But it wasn't the same, no matter what I told myself. You'd think after twelve years of not having to deal with so much stress, because three jobs were nowhere _near_ as stressful, I wouldn't miss it as much, if at all. But it had been where I belonged, where I had always felt the most welcomed. The most 'in my element' so to speak.

"Kami above girl, do you babysit?" I could barely hear Yoshino over the din of the room, it was far too loud to use my enhanced hearing, but her voice still carried enough that almost every parent did instead. These parents didn't need chakra enhanced hearing to be aware of where their children were. They just _knew._ The Hyuuga Twins didn't count because of the Byakugan, of course. Almost as one, the various clan heads in attendance turned to face me, trapped as I was by a crowd of _their_ children. Tsume grinned ferociously as Kiba began to use my ponytail as a climbing rope. I tried to ignore the sinking feeling in the pit of my stomach induced by Inoichi's pupiless stare directed at the back of my head, and began to soothe Ino's tears. Sasuke had stepped on her bare feet in his haste to eat his birthday cake, apparently.

I sighed as the horde of children finally scattered, screeching some nonsense about cake or something, and their parents crowded around me, looking quite pleased with themselves. I'm not stupid, I knew what they wanted and _hated_ them for it. Even Hiashi looked like he was gonna bust a gut, even though his brats, which included Neji and I refused to disbelieve this no matter what the Hyuga Clan Elders said, were some of the most well behaved children here. Except for Shino, but that was only because he wouldn't stop clinging to his father's coat like a limpet. I sighed a very heavily put upon sigh and turned to face them. "….. I better be getting paid for this. And I want my birthday bonus from every single one of you before I even start." Hey, if they wanted me to babysit their little hellions, I want a fucking advancement. It was only fair. Their only response was to nod and grin rather sadistically.

In all honesty, it wasn't all that bad watching the brats. They behaved, mostly, and enjoyed exploring the Clan compound of the week, which was often selected at random via pulling a name out of a hat. It's not a good idea to have clan children, especially heirs, on a schedule. It would be far too tempting to potential kidnappers and none of us wanted to risk that. Good things came out of these daily gatherings though. Because the Uchiha had finally declared their intentions, and secretly informed the other clans about the checks, they weren't being ostracized by the rest of the village. Some people still treated them like shit because of the rumors of possible Uchiha involvement in the Kyuubi attack, but the clan was growing to accept that as a whole. Unfortunately for Konoha's administrations and their attempts to move the clan into a far corner of the village, the other major clans began to show support for the Uchiha and disdain for the unfair treatment by helping them fight back. The Nara and Aburame, who shared a corner of property on both family compounds, refused to sell the land needed to build the infamous Uchiha district from Canon. This was taken to be what was most likely the biggest, and most important, show of support the Aburame clan could possible give. It was a known-secret that the Aburame, despite being a Noble clan, weren't doing well financially because most villagers, including shinobi, were simply too afraid to buy from their family produce stall in the Market because of their kikaichū. The sale would have saved them from potential bankruptcy.

In response, Fugaku began to urge all members of the Uchiha clan to become active patrons of the family, his way of saying 'thank you,' I suppose. The Akimichi, and thus the Yamanaka and Nara, followed suit. I didn't take much convincing, let me tell you. Aburame produce is _delicious._ I don't think I have ever tasted something as good as the very first Aburame apple I ever ate. I don't even like apples! And they make the most delicious honey, even better than the kind most people import from the Land of Honey. And that shit is goooood.

* * *

Relations between clans were never better, those next few years. The Uchiha weren't planning their coup de tat, as far as I was aware anyway, and it seemed as if everything was wonderful. It wouldn't last though, and I knew that. It wasn't a whole year before both Neji and Hinata stopped attending my babysitting group. She had turned three and Neji received the Caged Bird Seal, and soon after that, the Hyuga Affair happened. Sometimes I would see Hiashi and Hinata while shopping with Naruto or touring the village with the kids, but I never saw Neji again. I probably wouldn't for a long time, unless I ran into him training with his genin team or even at the Chunin exams. He wouldn't be the same though, and probably wouldn't remember me. A lot of the clan kids I cared for daily wouldn't, not by the time they graduated from the academy. There would be no reason for me to watch any of the future rookie nine once they entered school, or even when they all turned five, except if their parents wanted to have a date night or something.

As Naruto continued to grow, so did our relationship. I was his ever present 'Nee-chan,' always there with a quick word of encouragement after an especially harrowing day on the town. When he was five, he reached the minimum age children were allowed to run around the village without supervision. I was scared to let him go, terrified really, but it had to be done. He had watched restlessly as his daily playmates all grew too old to require a babysitter and became 'big kids.' In the end, the only one who stayed and waited for him was Sasuke, the sweetheart. They were best friends, had known each other almost all their lives. They were still rivals and competed over everything, but it was all in good fun for them. The week after Naruto turned five and they met for the first time with neither their siblings or parents with them, discounting the Anbu but they didn't know that, the pair proceeded to share a _Look_ and began to try and take over the town. Whooping and hollering included. I wasn't there for this of course, having already restarted my position at the bakery, but Owl was. He thought it was absolutely hilarious, especially the faces of people who couldn't comprehend an obvious Uchiha brat acting like he was, well, _five years old._ Apparently, there were quite a few people like that.

Five was also the age Naruto began his bi-weekly meetings with the Hokage and the age where I determined I had finally managed to save enough money to afford Naruto's first trip, in his memory anyway, to Ichiraku's. I was mildly concerned for my wallet so sue me. But those meetings with Sarutobi are what concerned me the most at the moment. Naruto had a bad habit of saying things one way, but meaning it another. Ex: "So Naruto, how does Misaki-chan discipline you?" "Oh, she hits me when I'm bad! I don't like it because it hurts a lot, but she always says it's for my own good." The week before, I had given him a spanking for purposefully spilling black tea all over one of my manuscripts because I hadn't let him go outside and play in the rain. Accidents are one thing and won't get you more than a light scolding in my house, but ruining something I had spent _years_ working on and was finally getting published on purpose? _That_ will get you an ass-whooping, end of discussion. It was how I was raised and getting grounded would only make Naruto worse. So I gave him five hard smacks on the butt, then sat him down to explain what he had done wrong exactly.

 **A Week Before...**

I raised my hand to wipe one of Naruto's tears off his cheek, but paused when he flinched away. I hadn't wanted to spank him so hard, he'd never done anything bad enough to deserve more than a light swat on the butt as a reminder, but he really had gone too far. I wasn't a very strict guardian, only giving him a few ground rules. Don't go outside at night, ask me when he wanted to go play so I wouldn't freak out, check in with me around noon when I was working, don't talk to strangers unless there is an adult he knows present or he could sense one of his 'guardian spirits' (aka Anbu) nearby, and lastly, don't touch my writing supplies. Those were the major ones I actively enforced, but he knew to come find me if he wasn't sure about one of the minor rules. I sighed and sat down at the kotatsu* table. It was nearly New Years, and while it hadn't snowed at all this year, the rain had been nothing less than chilling.

It was silent in our little apartment, with nothing but Naruto's sniffles and the pounding of the rain on the window the only noise. "Naruto... Naru-chan, come here." My voice was soft and low. But he stiffened anyway and looked at me fearfully. I felt my heart shatter with guilt at making my little brother cry. "Please come here sweety, I promise I won't hurt you again." Slowly, he made his way over to my side of table, still sniffling. I pulled him into a hug, careful not to move too quickly. He clutched onto the fabric of my kimono shirt and sunk into my lap. "Naru-chan... Do you know why I had to spank you?"

"B-Because I did s-s-something bad, right Nee-chan?" He sniffled and looked up at me with watery, sky blue eyes. "You always say that if I did that, you would."

I made a sound of agreement and rubbed his back in soothing, circular motions. "And do you know what you did wrong?"

Naruto was quiet for a moment. "You said I couldn't go outside and I was mad. S-So I spilled tea on your papers... And that made you mad too?"

"Uh huh. It's true, that did make me very, very mad, and I'm sorry that I yelled at you. That was mean of me. But what you did was very mean too. I've been working on that for a long time Naru-chan. How would you like it if someone came and cut down your plants after you've worked so hard to care for them?" He gasped in childish disgust and realization. A few months ago, he had found the shattered remains of several innocent houseplants next to a dumpster in one of the many side alleys, and decided his new mission in life was to nurse them back to health. I figured it was a good way to teach him some responsibility, so I let him do as he pleased.

"I would be really mad Nee-chan! Like, really, really, REALLY mad! Believe it!"

It is very hard not to smile or laugh when holding something so adorable. But somehow, I managed to succeed. I should get an award. "Well, how do you think I feel, now that you ruined all of my hard work?"

He looked back and forth between me and the drying papers on the counter, an extremely guilty expression on his face. Finally, he turned back to face me completely. "…... I'm so sorry nee-chan. So, so, super-duper-uper sorry I did that! You work so hard all the time on your stories and I just messed one of them up! I promise that I will never, ever do that again! Believe it!"

"Ya give me your word sweety? Is that gonna be your Nindō?" Might as well get this out of the way.

"Nindō? Wha's that nee-chan?"

I allowed myself a small smile. "Your ninja way Naru-chan. You do want to be a ninja, don't you? Every ninja has a rule they follow, one that they live by. Most here in the village follow the Will of Fire, but you can have more than one."

Naruto thought for a moment before sticking out his hand, pinky exposed."Than yeah nee-chan! I'll never back down or go back on my word! That'll be my ninja way, my Nindō! I'll pinky promise you right now!"

I burst into laughter, but latched pinkies with him. "I'll hold you to that sweety!"

 **Later that same day...**

It was silent in our apartment as I lay awake that night, under the kotatsu table. Naruto wasn't asleep, I could tell because the thin walls weren't shaking from the strength of his snoring. He was up a little late for my liking, but I let it go for now. The blonde usually only stayed up this late when he had thinking to do. I actively encouraged thinking in my home.

"Nee-chan?" Ah, there it is.

"Yes Naru-chan?"

Quiet. "...Do you have a Nindō?"

That was an interesting question I never thought someone would be bothered to ask me. I'd have to inform him in the morning that it was actually considered very rude by most people. "I'm not a shinobi Naruto."

"So? Do you have to be?"

Huh. "I guess not. Different people do different fighting, so I'd assume that everyone has some sort of code the follow."

"What's your's nee-chan?"

"I follow the Will of Fire Naruto."

"Oh."

It went quiet again for a while.

"Hey nee-chan?"

"Hm?" I was finally starting to fall asleep.

"Do you have more than one?"

"Uh huh." Damn, kotatsu were so fucking comfortable.

"What's your other one then?"

"…... To do whatever possible to protect the ones I love."

"That sounds like a good one..."

"It is... Now go to sleep Naru-chan, I have work in the morning."

"Okay, okay nee-chan." Ah, sweet, blissful quiet.

"Nee-chan?"

Never-fucking-mind. " _What?"_

"What's the Will of Fire?"

*thump* "Go the hell to sleep Naruto." I finally fell asleep, ignoring the sound of my little brother complaining about how I threw one of our spare zabuton* at him.

* * *

 **So there it is guys! This is probably my longest chapter yet! Over six thousand words! WHOO~ *throws confetti***

 _ **Akuma no gādian= romanji for "Demon's Guardian." Misaki thinks it's very original... NOT.**_

 _ **Kotatsu Table=**_ **A** _ **kotatsu**_ **is a low, wooden table frame covered by a futon or heavy blanket, upon which a table top sits. Underneath is a heat source, often built into the table itself. The type Misaki and Naruto use is electric. Kotatsu are used in the cold months because most Japanese housing is not as well insulated as in the West, so they rely on space heating.**

 **Zabuton= those cushions Japanese people sit on.**

 **OWL IS AN OC that I have yet to decide a name for. He is not a canon character. But did you guys like him? Seriously, did you? I have no idea what happened. He was only supposed to make the occasional cameo, but he decided to be a diva today and drop kick me from left field. But I think he's growing on me. Like a fungus.**

 **Do you think Misaki handled Naruto's misbehavior well? I know some of you probably don't agree with spanking, but it was how I was raised, and I came out fine. All things in moderation is the motto if you use corporal punishment, you have to know both your limits and your child's. And always, ALWAYS talk it over and hug afterwards. NO EXCEPTIONS.**

 **Bye guys! Please remember to leave a review and have a wonderful day!**


	7. The Massacre

**Ah, I just adore my short days. No classes until three, all the time in the world to goof off on in the library. Here I am, at my usual computer in the very back corner, nomming on pomegranate and peanut butter crackers. Which, seeing as I eat them EVERYDAY BECAUSE I'M TOO FUCKING CHEAP AND/OR POOR TO GET A FUCKING MEAL PLAN, I am beginning to hate. With a passion. I like peanut butter as much as the next girl, seriously, but you eat too much of one thing and you eventually hate it. My best friend once had money troubles and her family had to eat almost nothing but ramen for two years. She used to love it, but now** _ **despises**_ **it. Says it reminds her of rough times.**

 **So someone finally got Woodpecker's name right! MuiLOVR, congratulations! Now if only you'd respond to my PM so I can make you the appropriate flavor of inter-cakes! If you don't respond soon, I'll just switch to MY favorite flavor and go with chocolate. WOODPECKER IS INDEED GENMA!~ I decided on Woodpecker because it fits with the whole 'forest animal' thing I seem to have when it comes to Anbu and his thrice-damned senbon reminds me of a woodpecker's beak for some reason.**

 **You guys really seem to like Owl for some reason. Now that it's been a few days and I've done some (very sparse) planning, I have a few ideas for him. My friend Sacha thinks he'd be a good pick for the romance portion of this story, says they have good chemistry, and I'm on the fence about it. Thoughts, my dear reviewers?~**

 ***** _ **STEADILY IGNORES HER SISTER'S SHOUTS OF 'ITAMISA ITAMISA ITAMISA***_

 **Nevermind about the father-son pair. I've changed my mind. THERE IS NO LONGER A CONTEST.**

 **I forget to say last chapter that 2,000 ryo roughly equals 200 american dollars. 10 ryo to every 1 dollar is the supposed conversion rate.**

 **Doing a time-skip/change in POV this chapter, at least for a little bit.**

 **Disclaimer: My laptop is much too large for me to cart it to school on a daily basis. I own nothing.**

* * *

Konohagakure no Sato. The Village Hidden in the Leaves, or to its many residents, simply Konoha. Surrounded by bountiful forests and lush terrain, it was a beautiful village that simply glowed golden in the first rays of the morning sun, peaceful and quiet…. Supposedly.

"NARUTO! GET BACK HERE YOU BRAAAAT!"

Okay, not really.

"Catch me if you can, Kunai-brains! BUHAHAHA!" A blonde and orange blur sped down the street, weaving expertly through what sparse crowds there were so early in the morning. They didn't bother to try and help the poor, put-upon team of chunin in their attempts at capturing the Kyuubi container. They had given up long ago.

Naruto grinned in despicable pleasure as he managed to clear a market alley by jumping on the awnings and rolled as he hit the dirt to keep momentum, before knocking over a cart selling various vegetables, mostly cabbages, to create a short diversion. The blonde didn't bother sticking around to hear the merchant's dismayed scream of "MY CABBAGES!"* He was used to it after all. It was an almost weekly occurrence that wasn't always caused by him in the first place. Naruto would have felt sorry for the Cabbage Man, as his friend Kiba had dubbed him when they were five, if he didn't always refuse to sell to either him or his sister. He was a jerk, so Naruto refrained from feeling _too_ guilty.

Uzumaki Naruto lost his pursuers not long after that and slowed to a leisurely walking pace, hands tucked behind his head in pseudo-relaxation, ready to bolt at the drop of a pin once more. The eight year old knew they'd find him eventually, either the Anbu or chunin, but probably the Anbu at this point. Like they'd do anything. It didn't matter anyway, he'd hear them coming, if he didn't smell them first. Naruto had never exactly _told_ anyone he had superior senses, simply because he thought it was normal. Some of his first memories were trying to sneak up on Misaki-nee, with Sasuke as his reluctant back-up, but failing almost to the point it was funny. The redhead's skill level was simply too advanced for him, even now. While his hearing wasn't anywhere as good as hers, he couldn't hear people from two blocks away like she could, it was still pretty awesome, if he said so himself. His range was about four classrooms over on a good day, and his sense of smell was three. Naruto _hated_ the sensory games his sister made him do, even if they did have good results. They were torture of the inth degree. Like the time she handed him a little container of barbecue sauce, a restaurant specific recipe, and told him to find out which one it came from, no time limit. It had taken him two whole days to locate the place! Misaki could be so mean. She should stop hanging out at the Inuzuka compound so much, they gave her _ideas_.

He sighed as the distinct sound of hunger came from his belly and ran his hands through his short-cropped blonde hair, but headed towards the Akimichi bakery his sister worked at. It was starting to be time to meet up with Sasuke-teme and Itachi-nii, who liked to escort the pair when he was in the village, and thus time to head to the Academy. Naruto hadn't even eaten breakfast yet. Maybe, mused Naruto as he waltzed through the door and waved a cheerful greeting to the workers, he'd be nice enough to buy something for the Uchiha brothers for once.

"Ohayou Nee-chan!" He walked up to the counter. Seems his sister was working the counter today.

Misaki smiled at her younger brother in response. "Ohayou ototou. Long time no see." She checked her watch. "It's only been a whole two hours." The redhead stepped out from behind the counter to give him a quick hug before giving him a mildly reproachful stare-down. "What was with all the yelling a little while ago? Know anything about that?"

Naruto smiled, his whiskered cheeks stretching. "I may or may not have covered the Chunin breakroom with peanut butter. It goes really well with the orange walls and pink furniture!" One of the waitresses burst into giggles, but squeaked in fright when Akimichi Chomei pulled his head out of his oven long enough to glare and tell her to get back to work. He was nice like that.

Misaki simply raised an eyebrow, amused, but not surprised. "Uh huh, I'm sure." The eighteen year old returned to her post. "Usual Naru-chan?" Her eyes were soft as she watched her brother think. She almost couldn't believe it had been eight years since she had held him for the first time.

"Yup! And I think I'll be super-duper nice and get something for Sasuke-teme and Itachi-nii too!" She 'hmm'd in acknowledgement and took out the usual pastries. A blueberry-peach crostata with whipped crème for Itachi, a raspberry-swirl sweet roll for Naruto, and four slices of yogurt-zucchini bread with butter for Sasuke. Even as a child, he hadn't liked sweets, amusing Misaki to know end. Were they the healthiest of breakfast choices, except for Sasuke's? No, but it was only once or twice a month that they bought the stuff, so she let it go. She often bribed Sasuke to stuff his extra bread, the boy could only eat about two slices, down the other two's throats. Misaki was pretty sure Itachi was catching onto her game, with the tortured glares he kept giving her.

Naruto handed over the money to pay distractedly. Choji, followed by Shikamaru of course, had just come out of the backroom and they had begun talking about which classes they'd skip for the day. The blonde followed them out the door after accepting his purchase and half-assedly telling his sister that he'd late getting home that night because he promised to help Sasuke with his training after school.

* * *

I shook my head as my space-case for a little brother left with his schoolmates. I loved the boy, I really do, but he was such a handful sometimes. Naruto was the sun, bringing warmth and contentment to whoever crossed his path. Well, those who'd let him anyway. Despite the near full support of several major clans, there were many who still treated him harshly, like his teachers at the Academy. It wasn't so much physical abuse, they had tried that only once at the beginning of his first year, but more emotional and educational neglect. They taught him the very same things they taught the other children, it wasn't _their_ fault that he was always last to get corrected or they never saw his raised hand. That kind of shit. There were very few exceptions amongst the civilians who didn't treat my ototou like shit. The one currently speaking to me is not one of those exceptions.

"Good riddance, the demon-brat is finally gone. I just hope he didn't contaminate the food with his stink." He laughed uproariously, as if he expected the other patrons to agree. All that did was cause them to glare, either for being too loud or because most of them actually liked Naruto. The Akimichi clan was very clear that people who weren't neutral or couldn't control themselves were not welcome.

I grimaced, though I had long mastered making it look like a smile, and took a deep breath. "That 'demon-brat' is my little brother. Sir."

He blinked at me, not comprehending. His breath was so rancid, I almost gagged. "Huh?"

"I said that 'demon-brat', as you called him, is my little brother, sir. And I'd appreciate it if you didn't call him such." I continued smiling my 'You have no idea how much I despise you only because I get paid for this bullshit' smile. It was mastered by all who worked in retail. "His name is Naruto."

It took him a few moments to actually absorb this new information before his entire demeanor, which had been rather cheerful, changed to something the exact opposite. I almost missed it. "You're related to that monster? How can you stand to be in the same room with it?!"

I glanced down at the wedding band on his hand. It was rough and unpolished. Scratched. He didn't care enough to clean it regularly. I looked him in the face, doing my very best impression of Sai. "I'd say the same thing to your wife about you sir."

I have never seen a face redden like that so fast. This guy's blood pressure must be way too high. "WHAT THE HELL'D YOU JUST SAY TO ME GIRL!?" He growled, sounding very much like an animal puffing up to try and scare away a predator. I restrained myself from laughing…. for the moment.

"My apologies sir. I hadn't realized you were deaf _and_ slow. I'll do my best to keep my speech clear and precise for your benefit." I leaned across the counter, the biggest shit-eating grin on my face, speaking nice and slow, just as I claimed I would. "I said you're a moron who I hope to the Kami above is sterile because the world will end from the sheer stupidity that your spawn will contain." I wasn't insulting a patron. I was discussing the weather with a casual acquaintance I ran into while shopping.

"YOU BETTER WATCH YOUR FUCKING MOUTH _FUGU ON'NA*!"_ He slammed his ham-fist-thing, were those his hands what the fuck, onto the countertop, shaking the display case. I rolled my eyes. I thought only shinobi could get away with being drama-queens like this?

"Wow, I'm impressed. I've never heard that one before." I was about as disinterested in this conversation as Shikamaru with _anything_ at this point. I put my hand on my hip and raised my eyebrow. "Cripple Woman? Are you actually that unimaginative you can't manage a somewhat decent insult for someone who's half your size?" I wasn't really, not even close. I had inherited my father's height, towering over most women my age, or in general, at a whopping five feet, ten inches or 178 cm. But everything else about my appearance was rather balanced. I wasn't too fat or too thin, nor was my voice dog-whistle high nor foghorn low. My best features were definitely my eyes and hair, which was only kept from reaching my knees and/or suffocating innocent passerby with its curls by regular hair trims. I often stuffed things, like notes or lists, into my mane so I wouldn't forget. I never suffered a lapse of memory, but I also couldn't retrieve said item from the abyss of hell that was my hair.

Briefly, I wondered if my ponytail was long enough to render this man unconscious as he opened his mouth once more. "You think you're tough shit, don't ya brat!?" Maybe I could have Itachi help me weave some ninja wire into my hair for situations just like this? "You think you're so special, putting all of the clans under your damn demon curse! I know what you are, witch!" Speaking of Itachi, he was going to do it soon. He had told me so, in not nearly so many detailed words, the other night. The Uchiha Massacre would happen anyway, despite my attempts to stop it by strengthening the bonds between clans. I suppose some things are meant to happen, even the horrible ones.

 **The Night Before Last, Witching Hour**

I sighed and rubbed at my eyes, suppressing a yawn. I should have been asleep forever ago, but for some reason, I had remained restless long after Naruto had been tucked in. So I decided to work on one of my translations until I was simply too tired to do anymore. This kept me occupied for several hours, long into the night, I glanced at the clock, and early morning. I didn't often burn the midnight oil, or lamp in this case, and only when there was something bothering me, something I didn't want to acknowledge. If I went to sleep, or tried to at any rate, I'd be alone with nothing but my thoughts for company. Dark rooms and thinking had never ended well for me.

I was snapped out of my reverie by the sound of the balcony door being slid open. Soundlessly, even though it hadn't been oiled or cleaned at all in the last eight years, if ever. Shinobi than. "W-Who's there?" I whispered, not wanting to wake Naruto unless I had to. He was a bitch to get back asleep.

Silence, except for my steadily quickening breath as a shadow crossed paths with the moon and the skittering of fallen leaves across my floor. Finally, the figure deigned to speak. "Misaki-nee, we need to talk." I think I almost fell over right then and there.

Throwing off the quilt I had been snuggled in for the past four hours, I stormed across the apartment and pulled Itachi by the wrist, back onto the balcony. "What the HELL is wrong with you!? Are you trying to give me a heart attack!?" I whispered fiercely into his face.

"My apologies Misaki. I hadn't considered you'd actually be awake at this hour and was at a loss on what to do." He looked petulantly away from me, having been properly scolded.

I sighed, deciding to let it go for now, and leant against the railing. "Alright Weasel-chan, spill. Whatcha want this late at night?" I straightened, however, when I finally read the Uchiha prodigy's body language. "…. Itachi? Seriously, what's wrong?"

Itachi looked decidedly… nervous. Like he was at a loss at what to do. Out of anyone he knew, I was the one he never bothered to hide himself around. I didn't care if he acted all prim and proper or if he went around the village in his birthday suit, screaming and throwing glitter at people. I'd be more likely to laugh or join in than take offence. It's what made the clans like me, or in the case of the Hyuga, 'tolerate me.' It was, according to Tsume, a nice change of pace to not have to put on airs. Yes, because that's what the Inuzuka are famous for. Airing out their dirty laundry is more like it.

He took a deep breath, like he was centering himself. Absentmindedly, I noticed the lack of Anbu in the area. He had either sent them packing or knocked them out. If it was the latter, they might not even mind. Itachi was a captain after all. "In a few days' time, I shall be carrying out an order and then leaving for a long term mission. Both are S-Class, so I cannot tell you what they entail. I…" He paused to take another breath and pulled several scrolls out of his messenger bag. "I shouldn't even be telling you this, it's against protocol, but the Hokage has granted me a boon. I am allowed to inform only one person of my mission. No one but I shall know who they are."

"And you c-chose me!?" I asked, eyes wide. I had a pretty good feeling of what this was about.

He nodded. "Yes. You are not to attempt opening this scroll, only hand it over to the Hokage should a new one be signed in or if news of my death should reach your ears. If you try, the seals placed upon it will kill you. It is for a Kage's eyes only." Wordlessly, I took the scroll, hand shaking.

I swallowed to try and soothe my dry throat, but it did no good. "And the others?" I gestured to the other two he held.

"An official copy of the documents filed by my parents granting you custody of Sasuke in the event either they or myself are unable to care for him." The one with Uchiha crest. "The other is to be given to Sasuke when he is promoted to chunin or turns fifteen. It explains everything." Red, with 'Ototou' scrawled across it in Itachi's neat writing.

"Custody of Sasuke? And what, exactly, is everything? Itachi, what's going on?"

He sighed, almost unnoticeably. "Misaki, I cannot tell you. Just know that I am only following orders, for the good of the village. After I have carried out my mission, I will no longer be able to return to Konoha. Someone will need to watch over my brother, and I trust only you in that matter." His breath shuttered. "Please Misaki, will you please do this for me?"

It's almost humbling, in a way. Being trusted to care for someone else's precious person. With Naruto, it had been almost expected of me because I would have been one of many willing caretakers. Minato and Kushina had thought I would be a wonderful sister for their son, but they never once considered the idea I'd have to do it alone. Was I an experienced guardian? Yes. Did I have the knowledge to help Sasuke with his grief and trauma? Out of practice, but yes. Would I be able to provide a good support system and possibly prevent Sasuke from turning bad? Kami, I hoped so. Wordlessly, I nodded and took the other scrolls. Itachi seemed to almost deflate as tension left him.

"Thank you Misaki. I promise that one day, I will tell you what has happened."

I rolled my eyes and socked him the arm. "Sure 'Tachi. Just… just be careful okay? Don't talk to strangers. Lay off the dango. In fact, lay off the sweets, period. You're getting a little chubby again. Try not to eat Fish-face, no matter how much he looks like a shark." Insert raised eyebrow here. "And for kami's sake, don't forget your towel. You never know if you'll need one.*"

"Hai nee-chan." A small smirk formed on his face before he disappeared in a whirl of leaves from the balcony. I wandered back inside as a wave of exhaustion hit me. I placed the scrolls in the secret compartment of Minato's typewriter case and crawled under the warm covers of my futon. Sleep claimed me almost immediately.

 **PRESENT**

"Bitch, are you even listening to me?!"

I blinked at him before turning to face Chomei, who had deemed all the commotion enough cause to actually poke his head out of the kitchen. Wow, this guy must have been yelling really loud while I was out in lala-land. The gigantic Akimichi was actually half-way out the door. "Chomei-senpai, the mosquitos are really horrible this year, aren't they?"

"I think it's a little late in the year for mosquitoes Misaki. It's nearly December after all. But there might be some other kind of _annoying_ _insects_ still flying around." Chomei chuckled.

I sighed deeply, as if disappointed. "Ah. Too bad, I'd really like to know what this incessant buzzing in my ear is."

He dusted flour off his apron and shrugged. "Hmm. Tinnitus maybe?"

I didn't get the chance to respond as the man finally seemed to have enough of our conversation. "ARE YOU TWO CALLING ME A FUCKING INSECT!?"

Chomei sniffed at him derisively. "Of course not. Do you realize how much Aburame business we would lose if it got out that we called someone like _you_ an insect? It's insulting to bugs everywhere." A waitress snorted as she went past.

"Yes, yes it is," sounded a deep voice from the door. My grin widened as I took in who stood there.

"Shibi-sama! Good morning! How was your mission to the Land of Vegetables?" The Aburame clan head pulled out a scroll, probably containing our next shipment. He must have only gotten home last night.

He handed the scroll to Chomei, who nodded and went to get his pay. "Satisfactory. Several noble clans have begun to consider importing my family's goods. A drought, apparently. I also found an interesting specimen while traveling. A beetle that has evolved to specifically target ill or weak trees. It also… produces… a very nice fertilizer that I look forward to analyzing more."

"Ah. Usual?" He nodded, apparently done talking for the moment. "Well, when you're done doing that, I'm sure Naruto and his plants would love to volunteer as test subjects." I got out a take-away cup and poured in the coffee, black with three sugars, and two slices of blueberry-coffee cake that found its home in a Styrofoam box. It amused me that every Aburame I had ever met seemed to have a sweet-tooth almost as big my own. It seemed almost genetic. Shibi had explained that it was partly the fault of their insects, most of whom had a sweet-tooth themselves. The Kikaichu, according to him, would like me.

Again, all he did was nod in response. Chomei returned from the backroom and handed Shibi the money, part of which he then gave to me as payment for his breakfast.

"DAMN IT, STOP IGNORING ME!" He was faster than I thought he'd be. At one point, he must have had shinobi training, if the form of his incoming punch was any indication. I could probably take him, except I didn't know what rank he held. Better safe than sorry, right?

"Yeah, no. Owl!" Barely a flutter of movement from across the room and there was my favorite Anbu, blocking the punch. I could have dodged, true, but I was tired and not feeling like getting into a tussle.

Owl cocked his head and subtlety gripped the man's first tighter as he tried to squirm away. "It is illegal to hit civilians without due cause, Mid-Chunin Furukawa Nobuo." Nobuo, apparently, stiffened and his eyes widened in fear. I didn't blame him. Owl-kun could be one creepy sonuvabitch when he was in a good mood. But his morning had been rather shit so far, so he was quite pissed off. Something about being forced to 'retire' soon, which I didn't mind one bit. I almost felt sorry for Nobuo. Almost. He had called my little brother a demon after all. I relished in the killing-intent rolling off Owl and grinned.

The chunin looked like he was about to shit himself. "She's been pissing me off!" Oh, so he did have a spine?

"And? She did not raise her hand against you, nor has she threatened you. You have no excuse." Nobuo sputtered angrily but was not allowed to speak anymore. Owl turned to face me. "I will take him to the Hokage. Try not to get into any more trouble."

"Cause as much disaster as possible? You got it!" I gave him a cheerful salute and he sighed and shook his head. They left, Nobuo struggling against Owl's tight grip.

Chomei rolled his eyes. "Alright everybody! Back to work! Ari, your turn on register. Misaki, you're with me! I don't want any more shinobi drama going on in my bakery today!" I waved goodbye to Shibi, who nodded and went on his way, and followed Chomei into the kitchen.

* * *

"See ya later Chomei-senpai!" I finished folding my apron and waved goodbye to my favorite codger. He grunted his farewell, sending the flour on his face everywhere. I had worked from open to close today and I was exhausted. Kneading dough is tiring enough, try doing it one handed. Not fun, let me tell you.

I blinked wearily at the moon, high up in its perch. It had to be close to midnight at this point, which meant time to find Naruto, who should be still training with Sasuke at their favorite training grounds. Ignoring the sudden, familiar presence of Owl behind me, I began to walk. I had seen ghost towns with more people on the streets than there seemed to be in Konoha at the moment. They were usually bustling this time of night and normally didn't empty until about two or three in the morning. I frowned and glanced at Owl from the corner of my eye.

"Owl, where is everybody?" My voice was level and held no trace of my confusion. Probably couldn't say the same for my face though. It didn't matter. He cocked his head at me, the poster-child of innocence, but did not respond. He was tense, palming his weapons pouch. Owl has always been quite open with his emotions, around me at least.

The pair of us reached the training ground, which was silent except for the ' _clang_ ' of kunai meeting and harsh breathing of eight year olds hard at work. And they were.

Naruto was very obviously out of breath, but managed to dodge several of Sasuke's shuriken with a move almost like a pirouette, without the full spin, before bending backwards to avoid a slashing kunai. Pulling out one of his own, the blonde gave a shout and rushed his training partner, his sandaled feet making almost no noise, as if he wasn't touching the ground at all. Naruto had grown steadily light on his feet as he had aged, to the point he was more ghost than child sometimes. It was how he managed to sneak past the upper level shinobi and prank them. It was partly my fault that he did such things, not gonna lie. Over the years, he had to be so light footed just to 'sneak' past me. I also encouraged him to point where I even bought his supplies. Trap-laying skills such as his were almost prodigal, to the point of ridiculousness. The only reason he wasn't considered a prodigy was because I didn't push him in anything other than traps, taijutsu, and chakra control. I didn't care if he couldn't pass all of his tests or if he never bothered to do the homework. If he could prove to me, and Owl, that he understood the material and could find practical uses for it, I could care less. No one actually calculates the trajectory and speed of a kunai mid-battle, nor do they get quizzed on the extended family of both the First Hokage and his wife. He paid attention to that lesson on his own, though only to Mito-sama's family tree. She had been an Uzumaki after all.

Sasuke was much the same as he had been in Canon, before the massacre. Incredibly talented for his age, sweet as can be, and adoring of his older brother. I had carefully cultivated his idolization of Itachi, and the subsequent bitterness that came from being the younger sibling of a prodigy, by enforcing the idea of individualism, both with him and the clan. Fugaku had been warned of what the consequences could be if he compared his youngest to his heir, so instead of 'When Itachi was your age, he had already…,' it was 'Good job Sasuke, you're doing well,' 'Remember to focus on your strengths,' etc. It didn't work so well on the clan as a whole, so there was still a little bit of that brother-complex, but not as severe. Sasuke still mastered the Fireball jutsu at eight, rite of passage achieved, but he also began training in kenjutsu, archery, and building his speed. Skills like that would serve him well when he achieved the sharingan. I had no idea what he'd be like after the massacre, the possibility of it happening tonight growing exponentially, but I would care for him just the same. Hopefully, I'd be able to convince Itachi to at least lessen the illusion he put on him, or even keep him from doing it at all. Optimism, don't fail me now.

"Naruto! Sasuke! That's enough, it's time to go!" My sudden shout distracted the pair, causing Sasuke to slam face first into a tree and my little brother to trip over a rock. I burst out laughing at the dazed looks on their faces. Sasuke even had a single leaf stuck to his forehead, and it was obvious that it wasn't due to the leaf exercise.

Naruto blinked at me in confusion before finally realizing who exactly had dared to interrupt their spar. "NEE-CHAAAN!" The blonde launched himself off the ground and was soon clinging to me, arms around my middle. Sasuke tried (and failed) to make himself appear nonchalant, like he hadn't just slammed into a tree. Alas, the distinct imprint of its bark on his face did not allow such actions.

"Hello Misaki-nee!" greeted the black haired boy as he also wandered over to us, both his and Naruto's bags slung over his shoulder. "Why are you here? Surely it's not that late."

I grinned at him and ruffled his hair. "It's almost midnight Sasu-chan. Your parents'll be worried. So I'm gonna walk you home. Okay?" He nodded, a small smile on his face, before tossing Naruto's bag at its owner, who had begun a simply _exhilarating_ conversation about different brands of itching powder and their levels of effectiveness with Owl. We both ignored the resultant indignant squawk and began walking towards the Uchiha neighborhood. One of the few large clans to not actually have a compound to speak of, the Uchiha instead had several _neighborhoods_ were they tended to congregate around the village. Non-clan members were allowed to live there, the house I had been looking to buy was on the outskirts of one such place, but most tended to just leave them alone. The neighborhood I was looking at was small and almost abandoned actually. The houses were old, supposedly from when Konoha was first built, and the people with enough money to actually renovate were simply too lazy. The houses were up to code though, with new plumbing and electrical wiring, and were in good shape nonetheless. The relative abandonment might have also had something to do with just how close the neighborhood was to the Forest of Death. Less than five miles, the closest settlement to the training ground. But I didn't mind, I'd have someone put protection shields around the house and I would definitely be putting some fencing in. The house was simply too perfect to pass up and I was eager to finally get out of the cramped apartment.

Beside me, Owl tensed as we reached the neighborhood were the main family lived. I glanced back at Naruto, who had stopped mid-sentence to sniff the air, a frown forming on his face. Sasuke raised an eyebrow at his friend's behavior and waited for him to continue. But the blonde did not, simply paled as he finally registered exactly what he was smelling. My sense of smell was nowhere near as good as his was, all of my control on my meager chakra going straight into my hearing. Despite that, I had a pretty good inkling on what my little brother was smelling. I could almost taste the metallic tang of it in the light breeze.

"N-Nee-chan… I smell blood. A lot of blood." Naruto's sunkissed skin had paled considerably and he was looking just a touch green.

I shared a look with Owl, who cocked his head and nodded before reaching towards his weapons pouch. "Naruto… Go home. Go back to the apartment. Now."

He blinked at me in surprise, a similarly puzzled expression crossing Sasuke's face as well. But he looked more concerned than anything else, ready to bolt and check on his family. He trusted in Naruto's senses more than his own, most days. "But nee-ch-!"

I let some of my anger, my frustration, my _grief_ into my voice. "No buts Naruto. I'll be home in a little while. But trust me, go home and wait." The blonde looked ready to argue some more, but stilled at a look from the Anbu next to me. Moments passed before he nodded and turned around. "Owl, make sure he doesn't follow us please." I grasped Sasuke's hand and tried to soothe him. The poor boy looked about ready to hyperventilate.

"My mission is to protect you Misaki. I will not leave your side."

"Your mission is to protect Naruto, at least for now. Please Owl, let me do this. I won't leave Sasuke's side, but we need to know what's happened." I looked into the slits of Owl's mask. I hadn't realized we were so close. His eyes… they were a beautiful deep golden color, like the sun or the center of a daisy. I hadn't known that.

"Exactly Misa. Something's happened and you, a _civilian_ , want to go check it out on your own, with nothing more than an _academy student_ as backup." His voice gained a clipped edge to it.

" _There is blood splattered across the gates_ to an Uchiha neighborhood, it's so thick in the air, _I can taste it,_ and you're standing here arguing with me. Go protect my little brother. Please Owl!"

He cocked his head at me, in anger and frustration, but nodded anyway. Using body-flicker, he went off to find Naruto. I turned back to Sasuke, who stood trembling at the sight of blood on the gates to his home. He clutched my hand tighter, and together, we entered the compound. The Last Uchiha was sobbing within the first few steps.

"TOU-SAN! KAA-CHAN!"

I choked in a cry of my own as the pair of us stared in horror at the lifeless forms of Mikoto and Fugaku Uchiha. I knew they were going to die, I knew it would happen. I shouldn't have continued to spend time with them, shouldn't have grown to love them. There were a lot of shouldn't haves. _But that didn't make it hurt any less._ I fell to my knees, my legs being too weak to hold me any longer. My breath shuttered as I finally noticed Itachi, standing in the shadows as he was.

"Aniki… Tou-san, Kaa-chan…. Aniki, what's happened?!"

Itachi barely blinked at Sasuke's outburst. The moonlight shining through the open window revealed the tearstains on the thirteen year old's face. The last time I had seen him cry, he had been witness to an alley cat's death at the wheels of a cart while we were on our way to get dango. He was only two and a half and had been inconsolable for weeks, almost months. It had been over ten years since then.

"Aniki! Why is everyone d-dead!? We need to find out who did this!"

Why was I thinking of Itachi as a child? Why… Why couldn't I hate him? He had just murdered two of my precious people, so why couldn't I do it? Was it because I knew his reasons? Because I knew he was hurting even more than I was? Or was it because I loved him, loved him as if he was a brother? I had known him since he was a babe, too young to know the horrors of the world. I loved Itachi Uchiha, the gibbering toddler who could somehow speak at a year old even though it should have been physically possible. That embarrassed six year old who had just became a shinobi. This barely-teenager with stress lines and horror in his eyes, I loved him the most, despite what he'd done. My little brother, shattering right before my eyes.

"A-Aniki? P-Please…. answer me!"

Itachi's eyes flickered to black and he glanced at me. There was minute desperation there, as if he wasn't sure I'd remember our conversation the other night. Tears streaming down my cheeks, I nodded to him. Instantly, his sharingan returned and he looked to Sasuke. "Foolish ototou. There is no need to search."

Sasuke dared to look hopeful through his sorrow, and I sobbed only harder. "Really aniki? You found them already? Who was it? Who would do something like this?!"

"Me."

"W-What?"

Itachi walked forwards, stepping over his parents' corpses. "I killed them ototou. I killed them all. We are the only surviving members of the Uchiha clan left in this village."

"But why?! WHY WOULD YOU DO THIS!?" I flinched as Sasuke's betrayed voice rang throughout the room.

"It is simple, little brother. To test my ability. My strength."

We were in the street now. When had that happened? "THEN WHY NOT KILL ME TOO!? WHY LEAVE ME?" I could hear the alarm sirens blaring, ordering everyone to stay inside their homes or be thought an enemy.

"There is no value in killing the likes of you… My foolish brother… If you want to kill me… curse me! Hate me! And live a long and unsightly life… Run away… run away… and cling to your pitiful life. And then some day, when you have the same eyes as I do, come before me.*" Itachi's eyes took on the form of the Mangekyo sharigan.

My voice returned. "I-Itachi… don't do it. Please. It will do more harm to him than you think. _Nothing good will come of it._ Please… trust me on this." He had turned to face me and I looked him the eyes. They widened almost imperceptibly and I prepared myself for Hell.

But it didn't come. His eyes were as black as coal not a second too late. I stared into the abyss for what seemed like hours before a heavy ' _thump'_ sounded to my left. Sasuke had fainted, now far too overcome with emotions to function any longer. I looked back at Itachi one last time. He was adjusting his pack, readying to leave.

"Itachi." He looked up. "Fish are friends, not food and don't forget your towel." And with those final words, the world faded to black.

* * *

 _I,_ _ **Uchiha Fugaku**_ _, of Konohagakue no Sato, being of sound and disposing mind, hereby make, publish, and declare the following to be my Last Will and Testament, revoking all previous will and codicils made by me._

 _To my Wife,_ _ **Uchiha Mikoto**_ _, I leave the family home to do with as she wishes, and my shinobi headband. I hereby appoint her Acting Clan Head until such time she deems my heir ready. If my wife does not survive me after thirty days, is otherwise unavailable, or this Will is not read before her demise, her inheritance shall go to the following:_ _ **Uchiha Itachi, Uchiha Sasuke, and their acting guardian, should there be one.**_

 _To my eldest son,_ _ **Uchiha Itachi**_ _, I leave all contained in my Home Office except for the typewriter, a full inventory to be provided, half of my weapons cache, and that ceremonial Kimono I know he is fond of. I declare him my Heir Apparent. If he does not survive me after thirty days, is otherwise unavailable, or this Will is not read before his demise, his inheritance shall go to the following:_ _ **Uchiha Mikoto, Uchiha Sasuke, and Kishimoto Misaki**_ _, to be distributed evenly._

 _To my second son,_ _ **Uchiha Sasuke**_ _, I leave my jounin vest, the second half of my weapons cache, and all the books in my private Library. I declare him official clan diplomat and courier to Sora-ku. He is my secondary heir. If he does not survive me after thirty days, is otherwise unavailable, or this Will is not read before his demise, his inheritance shall go to the following:_ _ **Uchiha Mikoto, Uchiha Itachi, and Kishimoto Misaki**_ _, to be distributed evenly._

 _To_ _ **Kishimoto Misaki**_ _, I leave the house she had been considering buying, bought with cash and all bills paid for the next six months, the typewriter in my office, all items I have in storage, and a contract I had made with a publisher. I grant her full custody of my son_ _ **Sasuke**_ _, in the case that either my wife or_ **Itachi** _are no longer able. Her monthly stipend from the Uchiha Clan shall continue. If she does not survive me after thirty days, is otherwise unable, or this Will is not read before her demise, her inheritance shall go to the following:_ _ **Uzumaki Naruto.**_

 _Thus ends my Last Will and Testament. Inventory Lists are attached._

 _うちはフガク_ _, Uchiha Fugaku_

Witnesses: **Uchiha Mikoto, Inuzuka Tsume, Sandaime Hokage Sarutobi Hiruzen**

Sarutobi had the balls to look greatly amused, despite all the drama lately. He rolled the scroll back and looked at those gathered. "That sorts out that. Congratulations Misaki, I look forward to purchasing your first book."

The office was silent as the collected witnesses sat in shock, causing me to burst into mildly hysteric giggles. I had only been out of the hospital for a few hours before being dragged into the Hokage's office for an official reading of Fugaku and Mikoto's wills. According to the medics, I had passed out due to exhaustion, high-emotional stress, and a sudden drop of adrenalin. Short Version: My body finally said "Fuck this shit" and shut down on me. I apparently hit my head pretty hard on the way down, which is why I had to stay under surveillance for a few days. Sasuke had been through the same and was thus sitting stiffly in the seat next to me. He didn't know anyone here besides me and it was making him angry. As far as he knew, the only one left who stood to inherit anything of his parents' was him, and possibly me. I couldn't blame him. I knew for a fact that Fugaku hadn't trusted Danzo, so why the hell was he here?

Finally, someone had gathered themselves enough to speak. "This civilian cripple has been granted custody of the last Uchiha Hokage-sama? This is an outrage, a scandal!" shouted Koharu.

Homura spoke next. "And what is this about a monthly stipend? She is mostly likely nothing more than an inheritance digger!"

I scowled and put an arm around Sasuke. He looked about ready to pounce. "Oh shut up you old bags! You don't know anything about me!"

Danzo sniffed. "I agree with Homura and Koharu. You should not lay so much trust in the girl simply because she was favored by your successor Sarutobi. It would be better to allow him to live on his own."

The Sandaime puffed on his pipe. "I am not putting my trust in Kishimoto-san because the Yondaime liked her, Danzo. She is an experienced guardian, well versed in handling multiple children at a time. Sasuke-kun is most certainly in need of stability at the moment and she can provide that."

I zoned out of their ongoing conversation, trying not to get pissed off. They were acting like Sasuke wasn't there, talking about him as if he wasn't even in the room. I hated it when adults treated children like this. It was insulting their intelligence and could hurt a traumatized child's recovery. They need control, not meddling old biddies who couldn't remember how to be a child. The comforting presence of Owl steadied me. I hadn't actually turned around and greeted him yet, but Sasuke had given him a double take. I was very curious as to why, but I had more important things to focus on. Like figuring out how to deal with Sasuke's PTSD in a world where such things didn't exist.

I kept my voice cheerful, but stern, and interrupted them. "Why don't we let Sasuke decide where he wants to live?" His eyes flicked to me, surprise written on his face.

Sarutobi 'hmmm'ed. "And why do you think that Kishimoto-san? Do you not want him to live with you?"

"Of course I do Hokage-sama. His parents put their trust in me to raise their son, I don't want to let them down. But I also don't want to force Sasuke into a situation he doesn't like or want unless absolutely necessary."

"I see." The old man gestured for Sasuke to walk forward, up to his desk. "Well Sasuke-kun, what do you think? Would you rather decide for yourself?"

The uchiha was silent for a moment before nodding. "Hai Hokage-sama."

Sarutobi smiled in a grandfatherly way. "Very well then. I suppose you have already decided?"

"Hn." He walked back over towards me. I smiled at him and ran my fingers through his hair, purposely ignoring his instinctive flinch. I had dealt with children with Post-traumatic stress Before. I knew I could do this. It would be frustrating, unbelievably so. My little family would be stretched to its very limits but we would persevere. I would except nothing else damn it.

I bowed to the Hokage and his advisors, most of whom simply scowled in response, and we made our leave.

* * *

 **Okay guys! Here it is, finally! It's only been ten days exactly! Here's a question though. Do you guys prefer the slightly shorter chapters every few days or the longer ones about every two weeks or so? Tell me in a review please!**

 **MY CABBAGES: Yes, that is the Cabbage Guy Avatar: The Last Airbender, and no, I couldn't help myself.**

 **Don't forget your towel: This is from Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy, a glorious Sci-fi book. Check it out, it's hilarious.**


	8. A Fresh Start

**The muse has returned and keeps beating me over the head with plot bunnies! HELP ME.**

 **I took my first midterm last Wednesday. I failed it. Yay~**

 **I figured I might as well tell you that the pair was actually Zabuza and Haku, but I realized that the both of them won't work. So only one, not telling, shall be moving in with Misaki after the Wave Arc. You guys notice that Misaki likes picking up strays?**

 **You ever using a name generator for a character and you're sitting there, clicking away and skimming the names? And then you just spot it? The perfect name. It literally jumps out at you, doesn't it? Or maybe it's so** _ **close**_ **but not quite what you want? I'm the only one this happens to? Never mind then. Ignore me.**

 **We get to meet Owl without his mask today! ~ Yay! We also find out a little bit about him… You guys really really like him for some reason. It kind of freaks me out actually. Especially seeing as his character is developing right before my eyes as well as yours.**

 **In other news, I found the perfect layout for Misa's new house. Go look up "Totoro House Layout." Speaking of, I have shamelessly copied the opening scene from the beginning of "My Neighbor Totoro", which I do not own, not even on DVD. I couldn't help myself though, it was too perfect.**

 **Disclaimer: If I owned Naruto, Sakura wouldn't have been a fangirl at the start and Sasuke would've been dragged to therapy. And they might not have gotten married. You know, it used to be so easy to say "NO, THEY WON'T GET TOGETHER," when they weren't, ya know, canon. I like them both… just not together (serial Sakura multi-shipper alert). So now I have to decide because I actually really like Sarada….**

* * *

"WAAH! NEE-CHAN! IT'S HUUUGE!" shouted Naruto as he came bounding up the hill. I had just reached the top and was taking a breather when he and Sasuke, poor dear was being pulled around by his collar, came running by me. I smiled sadly at his back. For Naruto, I suppose any house with more than one room period would be considered large, seeing as this one was about the same size as our old apartment building. It was a semi-traditional, rural house, the only modern part being a potential-office area with glass doors to let in the sunlight. I had already called it.

Sasuke ground to a stop and tugged at Naruto's clenched hand. "Let me go loser!"

The blonde grinned, letting the insult go, but did not release his black-eyed friend. "Nope! You're gonna explore with me!" He had taken to heart my explanation and tips on how to treat Sasuke for now, and was thoroughly trying to socialize him again. Much to Sasuke's chagrin, of course.

The last Uchiha looked cutely indignant. "What? No, I'm not! Let me go, you're going to stretch my shirt!" Naruto pretended not to hear him and they went on their way to explore the outside of the house, Sasuke struggling feebly against him. I was glad they were having fun.

It had been a little bit over a month since the reading of Fugaku's will, and Sasuke was finally beginning to settle in. It was almost a fresh start for the three of us, four if you count Owl like I do. The bastard's lease on his apartment had just _happened_ to run out recently, so he was living with us for now. Of course… he wasn't Owl anymore was he?

A breathless laugh sounded from my left. "After eight years of following you and that kid around, you'd think I'd have gotten used to the amount of energy he has." Seitaro plopped the box of manuscripts he was carrying on the ground by his feet and put his hands on his hips.

"You'd think after eight years, you would have just accepted the fact that you were doomed to forever be surprised by my little brother." I turned to face the person who was most likely my best friend in the world. Either world, really.

Yokoyama Seitaro simply smiled and cocked his head at me, a soft look in his golden eyes. He had olive skin, tanned from training in the hot sun, and shoulder-length dark brown, almost black, hair, kept out of the way in a half-do. Seitaro wasn't overly tall, only a few inches more than me, but he was muscular, which more than made up for it. I am not ashamed to admit I was glad he had chosen a sleeveless shirt today. What? I'm a grown ass woman, not a fucking nun. Distractedly, he blew some loose strands of hair out of his eyes and leant back down to pick up the box once more. I eyed his back muscles and his ass, both of which were Kami's gift to mankind. I did not miss his old Anbu uniform. He groaned dramatically.

I rolled my eyes. "Oh stop being such a drama queen." I picked up my own load, a rucksack full of Naruto's clothing. All the bigger furniture was stored in scrolls, scattered amongst our little family. "Seriously, you shinobi and your over-acting." My smile acted as a buffer.

"You never let me have any fun Misa~" He stopped pretending the box was heavy and jogged to catch up with me.

"You have enough of it at _my_ expense Sei."

He chuckled, "That's not true. I laugh at the brats all the time!" I burst into giggles.

"Nee-chan nee-chan nee-chan! Look! The wood's rotten!" There was Naruto, hanging onto one of the columns supporting the pergola, while Sasuke tried to keep it from falling down on top of them. Flakes of white paint and chunks of wood fell down around the pair. Hmm, have to repaint that….

I rolled my eyes. "Naruto, leave it alone!"

He pouted at me. "Okay…." He stopped and dragged Sasuke back over to me. "Nee-chan, I'm bored. Can we do anything?" Sasuke had apparently stopped resisting. You'd think after so many years of being best friends with my little brother, he would be used to it by now. But Uchiha were nothing if not stubborn, even as children. _"No! I don't want to!" "But Ita-chan, you have to dress up for guests!" "No! It's itchy." "Mikoto, if Itachi doesn't want to wear the sweater, don't make him. And he's right, that thing is itchy." "Fugaku! Whose side are you on anyway?" "The one where the shouting stops, of course."_ A small, sad smile made its way onto my face as a memory came to the forefront of my mind without hesitation. Itachi's third birthday party... "Nee-chan? Are you there?" Naruto's voice shook me out of my reverie, allowing me to mull over his earlier question. I smiled down at the pair apologetically.

I 'hmmm'ed and thought for a second. "Ah, I know what you two can do. Go find the back door okay? We need to start airing out the house. It's been shut up for a long time." Sasuke took the keys from around my neck and they headed off on their mission. I turned back to Seitaro. "Well come on, this shit's not gonna unpack itself!" Rolling his eyes, the former anbu followed me into the house.

* * *

I swung the keys in my hand as Naruto and I walked around to the back of the house. He was, as usual, chattering away about nothing important, jumping up and down. It was grating on my nerves. "Loser, would you shut up for just one second?!" Naruto paused for a second, a hurt look in his eyes. I… I hadn't met to say that, not really. He wasn't being that annoying. Just… being Naruto. What was wrong with me lately? It seemed as if all I ever said was one mean thing after the other, if I even spoke at all. Misaki said it was normal, healthy even, but she wouldn't explain what was going on. Just that it had something to do with… That Night. When He murdered Them. My hand clenched around the keys as anger rushed through my blood, their sharp edges almost cutting into my palm. I would _kill_ Him, if it was the last thing I ever did.

The blonde put his arms behind his head and I wanted to just punch him in the face. But then, Naruto smiled and the urge, the anger, was gone. Still simmering deep down, yes, but not at the forefront anymore. "Whatever Teme. Do we need to go on a walk again?" Ah yes, _that._ Whenever I start acting mean, scared, or even a little jumpy, Misaki or Naruto, sometimes even Seitaro, would ask if I'd like to go on a walk. Or tree climbing, or hiking up the stairs to the Hokage Monument. If we didn't have enough time, Misaki would make me do jumping jacks or something in the corner. It… it made me feel better. Like I was in control again.

"Pfft, no. We just walked halfway across the village. I've done enough walking for the day."

"Sometimes Sasuke, you're even lazier than Shikamaru. Hey, there's the backdoor!" I gaped at the blonde menace as he ran off. Lazier… than Shikamaru? Me? "Come on teme, I'm getting gray hairs here!" I chucked the keys at his head, I would swear before the Shinigami himself there was a hollow ' _thunk_ ,' and stomped over to him.

"You… are a menace to society Uzumaki Naruto." I hissed. Naruto grinned and rubbed the spot where the keychain had connected with his head.

"Why thank you Sasuke, I try." He opened the door to house, snickering. "Ya know, it takes a lot of practice to be as goo-" Sapphire eyes widened and I turned to see what he was looking at. It was almost pitch black inside and you could hear some sort of rustling noise, like thousands of little feet all moving at once. And then…. It was gone. Light returned and we saw only the out of date kitchen, with its rusty, dripping faucet and smoke stained ceiling. Naruto and I shared a look, before nodding.

Together, we shouted and stomped our feet, trying to scare off whatever the hell had just been loitering in our kitchen. "AAAHHHHHHH!" It echoed off the walls but nothing came out. It was safe… for now.

I stepped inside first, checking the corners and Naruto followed me, looking inside of cabinets and under things, even the furnace. Nothing. Whatever it was, it was gone now.

"Hey look Teme, it's the bath!" came Naruto's excited shout.

I walked over to him. "Hn. So it is." We peeked our heads through the doorway and made identical disgusted noises at the cobwebs and grime around it.

"Ugh… Why did nee-chan choose this house anyway? It's so old, it's probably…," the blonde shivered, " _haunted_." Right, Naruto was afraid of ghosts, wasn't he?

I shrugged. "I have no idea. I think she said it made her feel nostalgic." I didn't feel like teasing him about it. For now.

"Wuuuh? But she's never lived in a house like this! Not even when she lived with my parents! They lived in a regular house, not in a super-duper old one!"

That reminded me of something as we sat down to wait for Misaki or Seitaro to show up. We had found the backdoor, as requested. "Has she told you anymore about them?"

"Hmm. Nee-chan still can't tell me their names, or even show me a picture, which sucks, but she promised she'd tell me as soon as I made chunin!"

"Hn. She's had to tell you something." Both of us had been curious for a long time about the true identities of Naruto's parents. Supposedly, they'd been famous shinobi, especially his father, and the reason he couldn't know too much about them was because the Hokage didn't want him getting hurt by their enemies. It made sense, if it was the truth. Naruto didn't like it, but he understood.

Naruto grinned. "She says I look just like my tou-san, but I've got kaa-chan's personality." So nothing new then. "Tou-san was also really good with seals!"

"Hn." The shoji door slid open behind us and Misaki poked her head out.

She smiled, "Oh good, you found the bath."

Naruto and I hopped up. "Nee-chan, nee-chan! Something is really weird about this house!" I nodded in agreement. This house was weird. It felt _off_ , it wasn't normal. It seemed as if the very walls were saturated with chakra, powerful and old.

The redhead raised an eyebrow at the pair of us, amused. "Oh?"

The blonde gestured wildly and I turned my head as to not get hit in the face. "Yeah! When we came in, the whole kitchen was full of these weird little black things that were poofy and _I think they had eyes._ " This last part was whispered fearfully.

I don't think Misaki's eyebrows have ever been raised that high, and she's seen a good majority of the clan heads drunk. "What?"

Naruto slipped off his geta, which were smooth as silk on the foot and worn almost completely through at the ribbon, and clutched his sister's shirt. " _There's something really freaky about this house nee-chan..._ " Once again, he muttered into the cloth of her pants. He was genuinely terrified, and I felt a little guilty about wanting to tease him earlier.

Misaki ran her hand through the blonde's hair to soothe him before looking the both of us in the eyes. "Well, let's see what we can find, hmm?" She led us into the bath and began to pry off the lids and checking the corners. Momentarily, she tapped her chin in thought and inspected the window as well. The red head grunted in effort as she pulled it open to allow some air to come inside. The cobwebs in the rafters swayed in the sudden breeze. Misaki looked at her hands, which were suddenly covered in some sort of black grime, and burst into giggles.

"Misaki? Are you okay?" I asked, a little concerned. It was just dirt, what in the world was so amusing about dirt? Even if, now that I looked closely, it was _everywhere._

Finally, she stopped laughing and wiped her hands on her mizuya-gi. "It's fine boys. Just soot sprites."

"Soot sprites nee-chan? What are those?" We followed her back out of the bath.

She smiled down at us. "They're spirits that like to live in really old, abandoned houses. Usually you can only see them when you're going from a bright area to a dark one. They scuttle around the place, leaving nothing but dirt in their wake. I mean, just look at your feet." Our eyes widened as we did as told. I'd gone wading in knee-deep mud, courtesy of Naruto of course, and come out cleaner than my feet at the moment. Even our toes and arches had been stained black. I scowled at the layer of grime.

Naruto wasn't even phased, as usual. In fact, he even looked skeptical. "Nee-chan, is this a joke?" I would have been more likely to believe her if it wasn't for the smile on her face. But otherwise, she looked sincere. Besides, Misaki wasn't the type to joke like that anyway. But I had been wrong about someone I thought I knew before, someone like Him. Misaki was…. she was trustworthy enough right? She didn't like to treat people like chess pieces. And she could care less about politics. But… what if that was all an act? What if she had just been pretending to care about me, everyone, all this time? She's always claimed to have known Him since he was a baby, so why hadn't she seen it? His insanity? Or had she and just not cared? What if she had _wanted_ Itac- That Man to do it? But why? Misaki was nice, she wouldn't do something like that. Never. But what if she had? No, she wouldn't. She's not using me, she has no reason to. Did Itachi have a reason? No, he didn't! But that didn't mean Misaki would betray me like that too! Why not? What has she got to lose? What the hell am I thinking about? Misaki would _never do something like that. Never._

Those thoughts and more raced through my head at an increasing speed and I began to feel faint. My lungs were on fire, smoldering like someone's just dropped cigarette. My heart felt like a jackhammer trying to beat its way through my ribs.

"-eathe Sasuke! Sasuke, stop struggling and breathe damn it! Sasuke!"

My vision snapped back into focus at the sound of Seitaro's voice, but it was Misaki's face that I noticed first. She was above me… Since when was I on the floor? She smiled and petted my hair. My head was in her lap. "Okay, good boy Sasuke. You're back with us. Now, you've had a panic attack. You're probably scared, and that's understandable. It's normal. You have done nothing wrong." She was still petting my hair. "Are you following me Sasuke? You don't have to speak if you don't want to, just nod or shake your head okay?" I nodded. "Okay. Now do I need to repeat anything?" Shake. "Good Sasuke. You're doing fine. You are in a safe place and nothing here will hurt you, okay?" Nod. Her hand felt nice. It wasn't so hard to breathe anymore. "Now Sasuke, I need you to raise your arms above your head, can you do that?" I nodded and did so. "Put them back down. Now up. Down. Up. Down. You're doing wonderful Sasuke-chan. I'm proud of you. Keep going, okay? Just a little longer and I'll let you sit up. Remember, you're in a safe place and I will do anything in my power to keep it that way. Now, every time you lift your arms, you're going to inhale, and exhale when they go down. Is that okay?" Nod. "Good boy. Now up, inhale. Down, exhale. Up, inhale. Down. Up. Down."

This continued for several minutes until my arms grew tired, and her hand never once stopped running through my hair. My erratic breaths slowed and I took the time to notice that Naruto and Seitaro weren't in the room with us. We weren't in the kitchen anymore, but in a room right off of it. She also never stopped speaking in that calm, serene voice that she sometimes used when Naruto or I had a nightmare. It wasn't condescending like the nurse who had been witness to my first panic attack after the massacre, when I was still in the hospital under observation. And it wasn't mildly, well, panicked like the Hokage's voice had been when I had gone to one of my required visits with him and a chunin came in through the window and induced a flashback. Misaki wasn't a quiet person, quite the opposite in fact. But she had her moments, like this one, where you wondered how she knew some of the things she did, or you realized that yes, even she could have secrets of her own, like everyone else. I'm not entirely sure how long I lay there, but it seemed like quite a while before I was informed I was allowed to sit up and that my attack has passed.

After I had moved to a sitting position, the pair of us sat in silence. This wasn't the first time that she had helped me with an episode. The first, in the hospital, when she heard a nurse mention to the doctor about my panic attack, she had about razed the building to the ground to get to me. It helped a lot, having a familiar presence like Misaki there. She always seemed to know exactly what to do. "Arigatou, Misaki."

She smiled at me. "Its fine Sasuke-chan. Would you like to talk about what caused it?" We did this sometimes, when we were in private. It was…. nice… to have someone to talk to, if I needed it.

I was quiet for several moments. Should I tell her? "….. You might get mad." I rested my chin on my knees. I would be, if someone told me I was the cause of a panic attack.

"No I won't Sasuke. Not when it's something that scared you like that." Misaki looked concerned now, but there was honesty in her eyes.

I kept my eyes glued to the floor. "You've known him for a long time… Did you ever think Itachi would do what he did?"

She sighed and flopped to lay on the tatami floor. "…. No. No, I didn't." Closing her eyes, she continued to speak, "But I always thought it was a matter of time before he snapped. I just didn't realize just how much he was truly capable of, I guess."

My head shot up and my black eyes widened. "Why would he-? Itachi always seemed so calm. Put together."

"Itachi… Your brother," I flinched, "has always been a… gentle soul. Especially after the war and the Kyuubi attack. He is a pacifist at heart, Sasuke." Misaki smiled sadly, and ignored my scowl. Itachi? A pacifist? "But he was a prodigy and a very good shinobi because of it. He was sent on missions that, had it been peace time, he would never have even glanced at, even if he worked in the Missions Office. He was far too young to be going on missions like that, but they needed his skills." Her fist clenched and Misaki's blue eyes seemed to turn to steel. I refrained from shivering. Even if she couldn't make killing intent, she really didn't need it most of the time.

"So? What has that to do with him going crazy?" I scowled to try and hide my sudden confusion.

The redhead laughed bitterly. I had never seen this side of her, this almost _tired_ side. Like she was sick of all the games, games I didn't even know existed. Slowly, she raised her hand and placed it over her heart, and steel eyes became distant, reliving a memory I would probably never have knowledge of. Naruto had told me a long time ago that Misaki had a birthmark there, above her heart, like a rounded dimple. "Sasuke, your brother's first kill was when he was seven years old. He had been a shinobi for only a year. Tell me, could _you_ kill someone right now? And if you could, would you?"

I glared at her. Did she doubt me or my skill? "Of course I could! I can do anything Itachi can, I'll have to if I want to avenge the clan!" Surely, she'd want vengeance for them too? She had loved Tou-san and Kaa-chan! But instead of pride in me and my ambition, all I saw in Misaki's eyes was an intense sadness. What had I said, to make her look so upset? She sat up, moving as if a heavy weight was pressing down on her.

Slowly, Misaki raised her hand and pressed her palm, coarse and callused from years of labor, against my cheek. She shook her head and smiled her small, sad smile again. I was beginning to hate it, that smile. "When Itachi returned from that mission, he didn't leave his room for days. He lit incense and made offerings to Kami. He ate only ration bars and drank only water. He mourned someone whose name he probably didn't even know."

"Why?" Why would Itachi do something like that? It sounded as if he had regretted killing them, this nameless person. And if so, if he truly hated killing so much, why hadn't he hesitated to kill our parents?

"It's just how he is, Sasuke. Killing for the first time shook him to the core. Like I said before, Itachi is a pacifist at heart. I always knew when he had killed someone on a mission. Whether it was a teammate who had been killed-in-action or an enemy shinobi, he always mourned for them. Just in case they had no one back home who would."

I scowled again. "Okay, but what does that have to with me?" Suddenly, she pulled me into a hug. I felt a moist spot growing on my scalp.

"W-When you kill someone, they're gone. Forever. You lose a little bit of yourself each time, and if you don't take the time to accept it, you will lose your soul entirely Sasuke. And you will no longer be You."

"Is that why he did it then?" Because he lost himself?

She pulled away and I tried not to pay attention to the tear tracks on her cheeks. "With all the pressure surrounding Itachi from his very birth, being not only a prodigy but also the firstborn son of a clan head, it must have started to get to him. Then Shisui died. Shisui, who was your brother's best friend. That was the last straw for him, I guess. Even the strongest of people can be broken with the right amount of pressure."

I scrambled to stand up and glared at Misaki, still sitting in the floor. There was a rushing in my ears and my chest was heaving with every breath. But it wasn't a panic attack this time. I was _angry_. At Itachi for killing our family. Misaki for making sense. Everyone else, because I hated their damned pitying looks. "So he went and killed the clan!? Because he was stressed?! THAT'S NOT GOOD ENOUGH! THAT'S NOT A GOOD ENOUGH REASON!"

Misaki stood up calmly. "I never said it was a reason. You asked why and I gave you a possible answer." She seemed content enough to let me yell. She didn't usually like it, because of her hearing.

"B-But, that's ridiculous! It makes no sense! If it were true, he should have gone and gotten help, not killed everyone!" It made no sense. It didn't _,_ it _couldn't._ I tried to ignore the little voice in the back of my head and its whispering. _But wouldn't you hate someone if all they ever did was pressure you? Telling you that you weren't good enough? And you never would be? How would you feel if what happened to Shisui happens to Naruto? Wouldn't you go a little insane too, if your best friend died? Killed himself? And you had no idea anything was wrong?_

Misaki looked so much older at that moment, like she really was the tired old woman the other kids in our class sometimes said she was. Her eyes held a slowly deepening sadness that seemed to encompass her entire being. Her skin had sallowed and her hair seemed limp. And it came to me, right then. Misaki… she missed Itachi. She still loved him like family, _despite what he had done to the rest of hers_. He was her little brother first, long before Naruto and I were born. She had _watched_ him slowly become the monster who had killed his entire family and it hurt her so very much. "And where would he have gone for help Sasuke? All the trauma he had endured as a child was on classified war missions. Most of it when he entered Anbu. There are no shinobi therapists, Sasuke. He couldn't tell me, nor you, either." Not without being dubbed a traitor. Of course, it was too late for that. "The only choice he had, as far as anyone knows, was to hold it all in until he broke."

I shook my head, whether to clear it or deny her claims, I didn't know. This was all so confusing, too sudden. I should never have asked. "B-But…" My voice croaked. "He told me he was trying to test his strength…" Had… Had Itachi been lying? He had lied that night? Could it be true?

"Itachi doesn't need to test his strength Sasuke. He is well aware of it. You and I both know that." I nodded my head. That was one of the few things I was still sure of when it came to... when it came to my brother. "Which makes more sense Sasuke? What does your gut tell you?"

A shinobi must trust his gut above all else. It was a common enough saying that it was almost an unofficial Shinobi Rule. I clenched my eyes shut and _focused_. What was my brain telling me? What did it know that I didn't? There was an answer in there somewhere. My breathing slowed and I felt my heart do the same. The tenseness in my body melted away. Tou-san had shown me how to do this, meditation while you were standing. With practice, you could have total awareness of your surroundings, but also be completely relaxed. He could even do it with his eyes open. Kaa-chan said it was just his way of sleeping through the Council and meetings with the elders, but all Tou-san had done was turn a little pink and cough, instead of denying it. Itachi smirked at him over his coffee, which was the same as Itachi bursting into giggles. Tou-san had tossed a piece of nori* into his mug in retaliation. Luckily, Kaa-chan had stepped in before another food fight broke out.

I focused on that memory and honed in on his entire being. It was the most recent and positive one I had of my brother. Itachi had seemed to be acting like himself at the time, but looking back, it was obvious he wasn't well. He hadn't bothered to brush his hair that morning before putting it in a ponytail, his eyes were sunken and dark circles surrounded them even more than usual. He wasn't even dressed yet, still in the tank top and sweatpants he always slept in. Itachi usually never even left his room if he wasn't dressed yet, unless he wasn't feeling well. Quick to anger, for him anyway, too. Our father often liked to tease us at breakfast, before his coffee kicked in and he had to head off to the police station. Normally, Itachi seemed to enjoy it and teased him back, but that morning he had been snippy and defensive. He didn't talk much, even less than he usually did, but he didn't need to. It was all in his body language. The way he ate his breakfast, with choppy, agitated movements. The furrow in his brow and the quick, furtive glances around the room. As if he was checking for enemies hiding in the breadbox. The way he instantly reached for the kunai pouch on his leg that wasn't there when I dropped my bowl and it clattered to the floor. Why hadn't I noticed all this the first time? It was almost ridiculously obvious now. Something was wrong, something was seriously wrong with my brother.

My eyes snapped open and I gasped for breath. I felt more than saw Misaki's reflexive flinch. I let her recover before speaking. "He wasn't acting right, I remember now. Not sleeping well and always jumpy. Not to the point that I noticed at the time, but enough that I remembered it."

"And what do you think that means?" The sadness was slowly leaving her body language and I'm not ashamed to admit I was relieved. Misaki was normally such a cheerful person that it sometimes actually physically ached to see her upset.

"Something was bothering him enough to make him act out of character, and there's not a lot that could do that. So it was big…" The red head waited, expectant. "I want to know what happened that night, the truth. Not whatever lies he spewed at me."

"And so, you ask him and hope he tells you the truth. What will you do afterwards? If he does?" That light of pride was back in her eyes and her smile had returned.

I breathed in deeply, trying to find a way to say it. "It… I think it depends on what his answer. Is it wrong? That I don't know?" If anything, Misaki's smile grew wider and she shook her head. Tentatively, I gave a small smile in return.

* * *

I sighed for what seemed like the inth time as I walked down one of Konoha's side streets on my way to the market, tugging along my small, handy-dandy gardening trolley. I was on my way to gather supplies for dinner tonight, seeing as moving was certainly a special occasion. I did love my cart, it was so useful. There are only so many things a human being could carry one-handed, especially when it came to groceries. I remembered many a failed attempt at one tripping it from the car Before. Failure usually meant dropping the milk and watching it burst all over the ground.

I had absolutely _hated_ lying to Sasuke like that. But his hatred for Itachi had to be nipped in the bud, before revenge took over his life. Besides, what else was I supposed to tell him? ' _Oh yeah Sasuke, the village that has been slowly gaining your loyalty through brainwashing ordered your beloved older brother to murder your ENTIRE family because they were traitors! Isn't that wonderful?~_ ' Yeah, that would go well. And I wasn't supposed to know anyway. What was the harm in simply planting the idea in his head? This way, he suspects that something was up, the truth, he won't try and kill Itachi all willy nilly and without a plan, hopefully, and he remains loyal to Konoha for the foreseeable future. The true test would be the second part of the chunin exams, but that wasn't for a few more years yet. Still, I need to start planning soon. First, get some targets for the boys….

My thoughts were interrupted as I walked face first into something. Somehow managing not to fall, I blinked and glanced at the object blocking my way. It was a…. a knee? I blinked again. Yup, a knee, encased in a bright green… spandex. And the world just got a whole lot better. I backed up until I could look one of my favorite characters in the face, close to the ground as it was. "Gomen, I was thinking and not watching where I was going." I probably would have looked more sincere if it wasn't for the super wide smile that had made its way onto my face.

Might Gai smiled back, the twinkle in his teeth making my eyes water. "It's quite alright Stranger-san! It is certainly not the first time, nor will it be the last, that someone has bumped into me!" He adjusted his handstand to put all his weight on one arm and waved the other hand nonchalantly, obviously unbothered.

I smiled again. Gai was so awesome. I couldn't have done that, even if both arms still worked. "Are you on your way to the market then, Gai-san?" We had been going the same way, except he had just meandered out of another side alley while I had been in lala-land. I would bet you 100 ryo it was the long way from his apartment. But unlike Tsunade, y'all aren't suckers are you?

"Ah, Stranger-san! You know my name, but I don't know yours! How unyouthful of me, if we have met before this chance meeting and I've forgotten! I've been told that's a bad habit of mine!" He looked so apologetic too. It kinda made me feel bad.

"Ma, don't worry!" It was my turn to wave off his apology, apparently. "If we have met before, it was so long ago, even I've forgotten." This was true. I couldn't remember if I had ever been introduced to anyone outside Team Minato when it came to their generation. It was possible, sure, but the team had been rather distant from the others in their age group. "It's just that my best friend is a jounin, you might know him, Yokoyama Seitaro? He's spoken quite highly of you! He says you're very strong." This was actually true. We had talked about Gai only a few days ago.

Gai righted himself, via badass backflip, and we continued walking towards the market. "Ah yes, Seitaro-san! I can't say I know him well, but he has always seemed friendly enough! He gives most of the chunin a good laugh every now and then."

"He can be pretty funny when he wants to be, can't he? He's a dork, but what can I say? You don't really get to pick your best friend, now do you?" I looked at the man beside me. He was usually described as being a fairly large guy and to most people, he probably was. But I am nothing, if not a rather large woman. He was only two inches taller than I was, and we looked to be about the same weight, though I'm sure all his of was simply pure muscle.

"Quite right Stranger-san! But I find myself confused." His bushy eyebrows furrowed together and it took all my might to not giggle at the sight. "What you said earlier, about if we have met before, it would have been a long time ago. It seems to me that you think we might have had a chance to have so youthful a meeting."

I smiled back at him as we crossed the threshold marking the Market District. "It's Misaki. Kishimoto Misaki. And yes, many years ago, there was a slim chance we could have met. While I've never been a shinobi," I paused to pat my aching left shoulder, the only part still able to feel but only when the weather was changing, and his eyes shifted to look, "I've known quite a few. When I was younger, I was taken in by the Yondaime, though this was years before he earned that title, so I spent quite a lot a time around his team." I couldn't quite keep my smile from becoming a little nostalgic. I still missed them quite a lot, even if two of them were still alive.

His eyes brightened in realization. "So you know Hatake Kakashi then? He is my eternal rival! We constantly participate in challenges against each other." I really couldn't help my reaction. I growled angrily, much to Gai's confusion. I had long since gotten over my anger about the argument from when I was nine. Oh no, now I was mad at Kakashi for a completely different reason. If there is one thing I hate the most, it was what he had done. Or more like, what he _hadn't_ done, despite the promises that had been made. I could understand the first few months or even a year, but the masked jonin had been absent for eight years. I had tried to find Kakashi off and on for the last few years, but hadn't had any luck. Either he just wasn't in the village or was purposely making himself hard to find, I don't know. But I long sense passed limits of 'irritated' and 'angry.' I was _pissed_.

Taking a deep, centering breath, it wouldn't be a good idea angering Konoha's taijutsu expert, I finally managed to respond. "Yes, I do actually. I haven't seen in him quite a while though." I grinned as an Idea popped into my head. "Tell me Gai-san, do you know whether or not he's in the village? I've been trying to find him for a long time, but it's as if he's never here!" Throwing in just a dash of self-pity and frustration like that, I would have felt guilty if I was actually lying.

"Do not worry Kishimoto-san! I know exactly where he is this time of day! I will escort you to him once we're both done shopping!" He struck his 'Good Guy' pose, which made me burst into giggles. Gai blinked at me in surprise, probably because he was used to people being freaked out instead. Aw, now I'm sad.

I tugged my wagon out of the small hole it had rolled itself into when we stopped and began walking. "As long as you don't mind waiting around for me Gai-san. I have three hungry mouths waiting for a celebration dinner back home, and I don't exactly eat like a bird either." Sometimes, I really wished such a thing as Costco or Sam's Club existed here in the Naruto world. It would be so much more convenient.

It didn't take long for Gai to catch up and we quickly began a conversation about what foods to best make for academy students and active shinobi. He even recommended some exercises for the boys to do. It made me smile, seeing Gai's potential for teaching in action. It was obvious that the (sometimes) gentle giant next to me was very curious as to why I wanted to see Kakashi so bad. I just hoped his opinion of me wouldn't change after witnessing me stuff my geta up his best friend's ass.

* * *

The first thing I noticed about Kakashi's apartment was probably just how…. apartment-y it looked. He kept no outside decorations except for a small scroll on the door that simply said ' _Beware of Dog(s)_ ' and ' _Go_ _AWAY_ _Gai!_ ' Otherwise, it looked completely normal and blended in with the rest of the surrounding apartments well. I don't know what I expected really. It was _Kakashi_. He probably wasn't even the village long enough most of the time to really do any sort of housework. In fact, now that I thought about it, I'm pretty sure this was the exact same building he lived in before Team Minato dissolved. I couldn't be sure though, I'd only been here once. The bastard was probably just too lazy to move out.

I snorted as I read Kakashi's sign and spared a glance at Gai. "Come here often do you?"

He laughed and pulled a key out of… somewhere, I couldn't tell… and unlocked the door. "Every day I can." I smiled as a familiar noise reached my sensitive ears from the now open doorway. Sharp claws on hardwood. That's right…. Kakashi kept ninken. I had slowly began to stress over seeing Kakashi again after so long and even if it had been several years since I last heard the sound, it still managed to relax me. "Kakashi! Come my cool, hip rival! I know you're home!" He stepped inside and gestured for me to follow him.

"Hey Gai, long time no see. Who's the pretty girl?" A surprisingly deep voice came from our left. I almost hadn't heard him coming.

"Pakkun, you're looking well! Kishimoto-san, this is Pakkun, one of Kakashi's ninken. Pakkun, this is Kishimoto Misaki, an old friend of Kakashi's."

I squatted and looked Pakkun on his level, trying to appease that wary look in his eye. I stuck out my hand. "It's nice to meet you, cute doggy."

The pug stuck his paw out and we shook. "I like you. You have some manners. Scratch behind my ears." I laughed and did as requested. "Oh yeah, I really like you lady."

"I try. I love dogs, it's one of the few things Kakashi and I could ever a have polite conversation about." Pakkun flipped over onto his stomach and I began scratching his belly.

He huffed and wiggled a bit, but didn't get up. "Oh yeah… yeah, that's the spot. I knew I recognized that name… Kakashi's told us about you and that argument you guys had. Personally, I think you were in the right. Oh hey Bull."

I reached to my right and scratched behind the ears of the rather large bulldog that had appeared there. I wasn't scared of big dogs, in fact they were my favorite kind. Bull mumbled something incoherent as he flopped onto his side. "Yeah, well, I thought so too. But it obviously went in one ear and out the other. I'm here for something else though. Hope you guys don't mind if I kick his ass."

"Go for it girlie. Boss needs a good ass-kicking every now and again. Come now, don't stop petting me just 'cus you heard him coming. Maaan." Yep, those were certainly Kakashi's footsteps I heard. While Gai's were heavy and thumping, for a shinobi, the silver-haired jonin was light on his feet, as if he thought he was walking on air. Almost ten years apart hadn't changed this, no one's footsteps ever _really_ changed, no matter the training you went through.

"Gai, you've already been here today. What could have possibly brought you back if it wasn't an emergen-? Oh not _you_." Kakashi's mildly exasperated voice sounded from behind us, through what seemed the door to the kitchen.

I stood up and turned to face him. He looked much the same as he had at the beginning of the series, except his hair was a little shorter now. Kakashi was home, so he wasn't wearing his headband and the bottom of his mask was untucked from his shirt. It _was_ getting late, so he had probably been about to 'settle' in for the night. My voice was deadpan as I greeted him, "Well geez, I've missed you too." Gai's eyebrows shot up in surprise. Poor dear, he thought Kashi and I were _friendly_.

Kakashi sighed and turned back to Gai. "Why'd have to let her in here?"

"She said she had been searching for you, and she's a civilian. What harm could she do? Why? Is Kishimoto-san an enemy of yours?" The taijutsu master's voice had taken on a stern tone, obviously prepared to defend Kakashi, just in case. I found my already intense fondness for the man grow exponentially.

"No Gai, she's not an enemy. Just an annoyance."

I quirked an eyebrow at him. "Seriously, where the hell is the love? 'Oh wow Misaki, long time no see! You're looking great, seriously Misaki! Oh me? No, I just look like shit because I never listen to you, but that's no surprise. Seriously, we should catch up sometime. _It's only been nine years_ since we last saw each other after all!'" The longer I talked, the more I began to shout.

He rolled his eyes and Gai became even more confused. I'm pretty sure Kakashi's dogs were treating our incoming argument like a tennis match though. "I had a mission, a long-term one." His voice remained chill and seemingly unconcerned.

"Yes, and then another, and another, and another! Don't tell me you're still doing that shit?" I paused to look both jonin in the face, what little I could see of Kakashi's is a moot point, and had to practice deep breathing. "Oh my god you are! Dammit Kakashi!" I know I've always said that Kakashi and I had never really gotten along, because we did fight and argue a lot, but that was our relationship. I still cared about him. We had enjoyed teasing each other, once I had dug my way through the first couple layers of his asshole-ness. Even now, with his 'laid-back' attitude and the mask, I could still read him. He was starting to get irritated with me. Good.

"Would you stop with that? It's useless. Nothing you say will change my mind about taking missions." I continued to glare at him, trying to stop the burning in my eyes. I had done my crying for the day. Sighing, he turned back to the very confused taijutsu master beside him. "Gai, could you just… leave? Please?" With little more than a nod and heavy clap on his best friend's shoulder, the other jonin left without a fuss.

"Thanks Gai. Sorry about this, it's just… personal." I muttered to him as he passed. A reassuring grin and his token nice guy pose was the only response Gai gave me.

It was quiet in that hallway for several minutes, as we both waited for the other to speak. Kakashi looked very tired all of a sudden and I'm sure I didn't look any better. It really had been a long day. "You didn't come here to rehash an old argument Misaki. What do you want?" Sure, let's just ignore the heartfelt confessions for now. I like that plan, let's go with that.

I let a bitter laugh escape. "Originally, I came here to finally kick your ass for ignoring Naruto and I. Now I'm just too tired."

He frowned at me through his mask. "I haven't been ignoring either of you. In fact, I check on you every time I'm in the village." Did he now? Sneaky bastard.

"Naruto doesn't even know your name." I glared at him. "You promised Them you'd be in his life Kakashi. I know, I was there."

The copy-nin sighed and finally took off his mask*, rubbing his face in the process. The fandom was right, he was _very_ pretty. A little too pretty for my tastes, but the few times I'd seen him smile helped me understand why he had so many fans. I'm a sucker for a nice smile after all. This wasn't the first time I had seen him without his mask, he had often showered at Minato and Kushina's after a mission, but he had grown into the final stages of his adult face in the last few years. The last time I had seen Kakashi mask-less, he had still been a little baby-cheeked. That was gone now, completely replaced by his narrow jaw and high cheekbones. However, no matter how many times I saw it, I always wanted to poke that little beauty mark on his chin. If nothing else, it'd probably annoy him and that always counted as a win in my book. "Misaki…."

"No Kakashi, shut up. You don't get to talk, you've had _years_ to get your say. It's not my fault that you blew it."

He rubbed his face again and I could hear the scraping as his fingers made their way across his chin. He hadn't shaved today. "Fine… But let's sit down…" I followed as he led to the living room, minuscule, plain, and dusty as it was. In any other situation, I might have been amused by the Kakashi-butt imprint on his couch cushions, probably the only place in the whole room he actually used regularly. Sitting down in said butt print, Kakashi watched as I settled myself against the wall across from him. I hated speaking to someone unless I was looking them in the face. Slowly, I allowed myself to slide down the wall and to the floor.

It took a few moments for me to get talking. "I worked three jobs Kakashi. I went from one shift to another, with barely a break in-between. Every day, for two years." His head snapped up from where he had been leant forward and staring at the floor. "I would be at work before six and not get home until 22:00 most days, 21:00 if there weren't any emergencies at the Inuzuka clinic. I took Naruto with me everywhere I went. I couldn't trust him with _anyone_. I was spit on by customers as I'd hand them their change. People would constantly try to take him out of his carrier or attempt to unclip it from my back as we were walking down the street. They set fire to our old apartment a total of eight times, for every year Naruto's been alive. And now that we've finally moved into an actual house, I'm still terrified that one day, they'll succeed. That my family will be asleep or just not paying attention and some drunk villagers will find out where we live and set the house on fire." I laughed through my tears. I had given up on not crying again. "I have an ex-Anbu living with me and two academy students who are probably stronger than I am, even though they're eight. And all I can think is 'Please kami, don't let them die. I don't want to lose them too. I _can't_ lose them.'" Kakashi remained silent, staring at me intently with his grey and red eyes. So, I pressed on. "I-It's just…" I brought my knees up to my chest. "I just…. I wish you had been there Kakashi. Even little glimpses of you now and again, just enough for me to know you were okay, physically if nothing else."

"Why?"

I looked up at him. His gray eye seemed to harden, as if he was angry, but Obito's had taken up a rather soft look. Vaguely, I wondered if there was some way that dumbass was able to see us. Impossible, obviously, but a nice thought nonetheless. "Huh?"

Kakashi's voice had become clipped and short, "Why? Why would want to know I was okay?" He didn't need to speak that last unheard question for me to understand it. ' _What's in it for you?_ ' Almost as one, we stood up.

The thing is… I knew I was shouting. I knew arguing wouldn't help to mend any bridges. But I wasn't angry. Upset? Yes. It'd been a very emotional day for me. It wasn't right to start using Kakashi as a (debatably) innocent sounding board but he was _there_ and Seitaro _wasn't_. Gone were the days where I could spend hours just talking away, smoothing out the wrinkles forming in my psyche, with someone I trusted. We hadn't been able to do that for months and I needed to let it go and he was tense too. With the boys starting school again soon, it'd go back to whatever kind of normal we had going before, but it was building up bad. It wasn't right of me, it wasn't. I should have been in better control, been the better person. But I couldn't help it. And at the moment, I hadn't wanted to. I felt like I was slowly being sucked down a drain with not even a pool noodle to help me stay afloat and the only way to stay alive was to just… let go.

"WHY?! WHY?! YOU'RE SERIOUSLY ASKING THAT?! I got into the copy-nin's face and looked down at him. We were almost the same height, but I was oh-so _delightfully_ taller than him. "DAMN IT HATAKE, I CARE ABOUT YOU! I'VE BEEN WORRIED SICK FOR THE LAST NINE FUCKING YEARS BECAUSE YOU COULDN'T EVEN TAKE THE TIME TO STICK YOUR HEAD IN MY DOOR AND WAVE!"

Kakashi's eyes were the widest they was ever going to get this point. "W-What?"

"You could have _died_ and I would have never even known because I don't qualify enough to be on your Next-of-Kin list! I would have found out through an obituary or even just walking by your funeral! Yes, I know that missions can be dangerous and horrible! You know I do!" My breath shuttered in my chest as I paused. "You cared, loved, Minato and Kushina as much as I do, maybe even more! You're hurting and trying not to focus on it, distracting yourself with constant life and death situations. I'm hurting too! I've just lost three more of my loved ones and I'm supposed to be strong for the ones I have left. I have to help them heal when I can't even help myself!"

"The Uchiha Massacre. Fugaku and Mikoto…" He tensed. "You… you still consider Itachi a little brother? After what he did?" Kakashi knew my feelings concerning the Uchiha main family and I hadn't changed all that much over the years. If anything, my feelings had only grown stronger.

I couldn't be bothered to look at him, not when he had that almost disapproving look in his eyes. I felt Obito's eye glaring into my skull, whispering ' _Shut up. You're going to ruin whatever crappy plan you have going for you Misa. People aren't supposed to know you still care for him. SHUT UP!_ ' Obito wasn't even here and he was being an asshole. Fuck you Obito.* "How…. H-How could I not Kakashi? He was my little brother, I can't just _stop_ loving him. He's gone, and I'll never see him again." Except maybe in the bingo book or even just his memorial picture. For my sanity, and Sasuke's, I truly hoped it was never the latter.

He remained silent, processing my confession. Slowly, he relaxed again. "….. But why worry about me as well?"

"Kakashi….. I have watched five of my precious people have their names be scratched onto that damn stone. I really _really_ don't want to have see yours there too." My beloved tou-san. Obito, Rin. Minato, and Kushina too. I had carved my father's name myself, with Minato's help. Even though he wasn't even native to the Land of Fire, Kishimoto Jinzaburo would forever be honored for his sacrifice by the Memorial Stone itself. "We are the last remaining members of Team Minato, Kashi." I spared a quick glance around the room and swiped a finger across the coffee table, sneering at the collected dust and wiping it on his sleeve. "Someone has to make sure you do your chores, might as well be me."

He let out a dry chuckle as the tension in the air finally dissipated, and rubbed Obito's eye. I wonder if it itches. I bet it does. "That's right, you did used to help us out the few times we ever did D-ranks, didn't you?"

"Ya know, I vaguely remember Mina-tou* only making you guys do those as punishment." I grinned at him.

He plopped boneless back onto his couch, sending a cloud of dust everywhere. "And _I_ vaguely remember you stealing my food and trying to make off with it."

"Oi! I was a growing young girl! And the way you say it makes it sound like it was always my fault y'all got into trouble!"

Kakashi gasped dramatically, obviously holding back a laugh, "What? Of course not!"

We shared a look and together said, "It was Obito's!"

We were still giggling, or 'chuckling' in his case, what the fuckever Kakashi you were giggling, ten minutes later when there was a knock on the door. I glanced at Kakashi, maskless at the moment but scrambling to find said article of clothing, it was under a couch cushion, and went to answer the door.

"Who is it?~" I asked cheerfully as another knock sounded off the thin gateway to Hell *cough*, I mean Kakashi's apartment.

A humorously deepened voice answered with an enigmatic " _ **Pizza Man!**_ " Squealing in delight, I threw open the door and threw my arm around Seitaro's neck. Being used to this, he knew immediately wrapped an arm around my waist to steady the both of us. Barely.

I grinned happily up at the brown haired man, "Seitaro! Hi!" He cocked his head and grinned back.

"Misaki! So this is where you've been hiding! The boys sent me off to find you."

I pulled away from the hug, not noticing or caring that the ex-anbu still had his arm around me. "Sorry Sei, I was getting ready to leave, I swear." I turned and called back into the apartment. "Kakashi! I gotta go!"

He stuck his now masked head out of the living room, looking just a little like a meerkat. He sighed dramatically. "Alright, fine. Leave me here with nothing but my dogs for company."

"Whatever!" I rolled my eyes at him. "I'd better see you sitting at my dinner table at 17:00 Saturday, or I will hunt you down! Got that?"

He gave me a lazy salute. "Hai hai. Whatever you say Misaki."

"Don't you 'Misaki' me! And don't be late!" And with that, I picked up the handle of my wagon and grabbed Seitaro by the hand. It was only when we were passing by Market Street, because of course Kakashi had to live half-way across the village from our house, that he deigned to speak again.

"Great, now we'll be even later." He said with a sigh.

I blinked at him, confused. "What? Why?"

Rolling his eyes, he pointed down at my wagon full of groceries. " _Because_ you left the wagon outside for almost two hours and none of the meat got frozen in time."

"OH MAAAAAAAAAAAAN!"

* * *

 **I know, it's been a few weeks. But you get an 11,000 word chapter because of it, so shush. I'm pretty sure that makes it balanced out a bit more. Speaking of which, that means I broke the wall again! WHOO~**

 **Kakashi's Face: Kishimoto has actually given us Kakashi's face. I recently found this out myself, but he really is super hot! It's on Kakashi's wikipage!**

 **Fuck You Obito: "** _ **Somewhere, in a far off land, Obito sneezed during a meeting with the Akatsuki and got snot all over the inside of his mask."**_

 **Mina-tou: Yes, this is Misaki combining Minato with Tou-san, which if you don't know, (DO YOU EVEN ANIME?!) means Father or its variations in Japanese.**

 **So dd y'all like this chapter? I hope so, I worked really hard on it. Yes, Kakashi and Misaki will be bros now. They just had to settle some stuff first. What? Their relationship wasn't gonna be just sunshine and daisies when they met again.**

 **We get a look on the kind of things Misaki has been skipping over during time skips this chapter and also a peek into her mind set. We met Owl, who is actually pretty damn hot.**

 **Gai made an appearance! Yay~ Was he in character? Was everyone too? Canon characters are hard to write sometimes...**

 **BYE GUYS~ PLEASE REMEMBER TO LEAVE A REVIEW AND HAVE A NICE DAY.**


	9. Secrets RevealedFillerFish are Friends

**Hi guys! So I'm on fall break at the mo, if two days off actually counts as a break damn school, so I decided to start writing the next chapter. I don't know how good it's gonna be, seeing as I'm sorta half asleep even though I've had two cups of coffee. Who knows, I might just give up mid-chapter and start my yu yu rewatch. Out of all the anime I have ever seen, Yu Yu Hakusho is probably the easiest one to marathon for some reason. Maybe because it's actually pretty short for a shounen anime? Just a little bit over 110 episodes. Man, I wish it'd get a reboot like Hunter X Hunter did.**

 **So you guys seemed to really like the last chapter! I'm glad, I worked really hard on it. This is probably one of my most popular stories ever, and y'all have no idea how happy that makes me. The sheer amount of favorites and reviews compared to the amount of chapters I've posted is astronomical! And I am suddenly using my large vocabulary. Good, that means my Nos is kicking in.**

 **I actually have a favor to ask some of you, for those who might be artists. I would really, really, really love it if you could maybe do some fanart? I am rather proud of the cover image I made for my story, but I would love to see you guy's interpretations of what you think Misaki actually looks like. And I am not afraid to admit I would love to able to show it off. Misaki actually has a NarutoOriginalsWiki page and I would love to replace the picture with some legit fanart. You don't have to though, and I honestly feel a little guilty asking. Not guilty to where I won't ask, but enough to doubt y'all's reactions.**

 **My cat is sitting on my mouse pad and trying to nap. STOP MOVING YOU LITTLE SHIT.**

 **Disclaimer: I finally have a laptop of my own, but seeing as I'm not using it at the moment, that doesn't matter. Either way, still don't own Naruto.**

* * *

I think I loved this feeling more than anything in the world. The rush of cold air past my ears, the wind in my face. The sudden, but somehow expected, sensation of the snow-covered ground rushing to meet me as I threw myself off the swing, trying to go farther than Sasuke. I never had, not yet, but I would one day. Winter was my favorite season, besides fall of course, simply because of this feeling. It was fun to dive headfirst into a pile of leaves come November, but winter brought hot chocolate and yummy soups that Misaki-nee always homemade.

Grinning from ear to ear, I turned to launch off the swing again. "NARUTO!" came the voice of Iruka-sensei. Nee-chan always said to give him a chance and that'd he'd come around, but I didn't believe her. He was almost as bad as the Cabbage Man! I mean yeah, he was starting to get a little better, but he was still a jerk!

"Whaaaaat?" I yelled back at my homeroom teacher. I tried not to snicker as the pulsing vein in his forehead grew larger.

The chunin stomped over and picked me up by the collar, ignoring my protests. "Naruto! Break ended half an hour ago, you dimwit! How do you expect to graduate at this rate if you never even bother to attend class!?" Iruka began walking back towards the Academy, somehow not losing his grip on my jacket. Curse nee-chan for making me where my button up today! It was too small! I couldn't slip out of it and escape!

I scowled at him. "So? I pay attention in the important classes, don't I? I know that stuff!"

He rolled his eyes, which only made me angrier. I hated when people did that, like they were just writing me off because I didn't have anything important to say. "They're all important Naruto. Besides, how do you expect to beat Sasuke if you're dead last and he's rookie of the year when you both graduate? _If_ you graduate." The sensei gestured vaguely to the other kids in the classroom.

"I don't need good grades to beat the teme! Besides, I know the important stuff, while he's too busy stuffing his brain full of the useless crap you and the others teach!" I pointed angrily at my best friend and rival, who rolled his eyes with a smirk. The Uchiha was far too used to this by now. His fangirls, however, looked like they were about to start foaming at the mouth.

Iruka's vein grew three sizes that day. Growling, he began to fiercely grind his knuckles into the top of my head, "Oh really? I teach useless crap huh? Okay, smarty-pants, what exactly is it that's useless?" Out of the corner of my eye, I saw Sasuke sigh and silently bang his down on his desk.

I grinned as the chunin finally pulled away. "Well, math for one!"

"Math?" Iruka's voice was deadpan and he looked suitably unimpressed.

"Yeah! I'm not talking about the basics, Iruka-sensei! I mean stuff like math for kunai and finding trajectories and speed and crap like that!" I ignored the surprised mutter about my vocabulary, but didn't hold back a snicker when I heard that same voice squeal in pain after having a sharpened pencil thrown at him. Good on Kiba, giving that jerk what for. "We won't need to know that kinda stuff when we graduate, unless we go into tracking or something!"

Iruka blinked at me in surprise, which I took as a sign to keep going. "History too! Why do we need to learn the village's history _every year_ sensei? We all know it, even me! Why can't we learn something more interesting, like about other villages? We're allies with Suna right? Let's learn about them! I'm sure their weapons and jutsu are super cool!"

"A-Ano," came a shy voice from behind me. "I think that'd be a really good idea sensei," Sakura-chan put in. She was soooo pretty and nice and smart, but a little scary when you made her mad, kinda like Misaki-nee. But the pinkette had a thing for the teme, supposedly, so I left her alone. "I heard in Suna, they use what's called a 'battle puppet' for long distance fighting. Is that true?"

Iruka blinked down at her next, before nodding. "Yes, Sakura, it's true. They build a lot of traps and things into them, and use poisons as well. They're controlled with chakra strings. I've never had the pleasure of meeting a puppet user myself, but I've seen one in action, during my chunin exam. They are indeed quite cool to watch."

The room exploded with raised hands and questions, and I made my way back to the seat next to Sasuke. Most of the class thought I sat next to him so I could cheat. Obviously, this wasn't true. No one actually seemed to know we were friends, let alone actually share a room together. But that was okay, it was how we wanted it. I actually knew most of what was taught during the classes I skipped, and even did the homework on a separate piece of paper, checking the answers with Sasuke's graded work. Math was actually really easy though, and so was calligraphy. Our sensei in that class said I had a very steady hand.

The reason the teme and I faked our relationship, and I faked my grades, was simple. We wanted to be on the same team as genin. When nee-chan and Seitaro had explained that the rookie and deadlast were normally placed on the same team to balance it out, I had gotten an _idea_. A long term prank, years in the making. Fooling the whole of the village's officials, our classmates, even our potential jounin sensei. Sasuke had agreed to go along immediately. So, we staged a fight at the beginning of the year, surprising all of our peers. We were best friends after all, why were we fighting? And from then on, Sasuke and I 'hated' each other. Neither of us could wait until graduation and we could come clean. It was going to be _glorious_.

* * *

Iruka-sensei clapped his hands loudly, gaining my attention from where it had been focused elsewhere, specifically, out the window and in the snow. Beside me, Sasuke shifted and I knew it was the same for him.

"Okay class! Our time is almost up. A reminder to everyone's whose turn it is this week for a home visit. Please remember to meet with your assigned sensei before you leave so that they can escort you home!" The bell rang, loud and shrill, making me wince, and there was chaos. "Naruto! I'm with you, so stay behind!"

I scowled. "Hai, hai Iruka-sensei!" Sasuke was packing up his things. I leant forward and whispered, "Hurry on back home and have the camera ready. I wanna see his face when he realizes you live with me." Smirking, the Uchiha nodded and left. I finished packing my bag and grabbed my coat from the back of my chair. I wandered over to the teacher's desk.

The scarred chunin tugged on his coat and wrapped his scarf around his neck. By now, the classroom was empty, as were most of the halls. I shifted from foot to foot. Finally, he sighed. "Right. Come on Naruto, let's get this over with."

I stuck my arms behind my head. "For once, we're in agreement Iruka-sensei." I sighed in delight as my boots crunched in the crisp snow. "What am I supposed to do anyway? Go straight home?" I hadn't been paying attention during his explanation the first time.

Iruka shook his head and sighed. "Just follow your usual routine Naruto. Act like I'm not even here." Hmm… I could do that.

Stretching, I reached for the sky, a wide grin on my face. "Alright! Ichiraku ramen, here I come!" I could use some right now…. Of course, I could use some all the time.

"What? Wh- Hey! Wait for me!" Iruka shouted as I bolted down the street. Once we had reached the small stall, the teacher was breathing heavily and I wasn't even winded.

Waving at Teuchi in greeting, I plopped down on one of the stools. "One large miso ramen with extra roasted pork please!"

Teuchi raised his spoon in acknowledgement. "Sure thing Naruto-kun! What about your friend there?" I blinked at him before a smile broke across my face and I turned back to Iruka-sensei.

"Oh right! Iruka-sensei, do you want some ramen? Come on, my treat!"

Poor sensei, he looked way too surprised. After several moments, he finally managed a quick "Uh… medium beef? Thank you Naruto…." The last part was said very softly and when I turned back after ordering, there was a weird look in his eyes, like he didn't know what to think.

"No problem Sensei!" I grinned at him, before letting loose an excited shout as my order was placed in front of me.

Behind me, Iruka sighed. "Naruto, what are we doing now?" I turned to face him, pausing my haggling with the stall owner over a fish.

"Once a month, I go shopping for groceries Iruka-sensei. It just happens today is that day." He nodded in understanding and I returned back to arguing over a fish.

The woman running the stall sneered at me. "Listen brat, I won't sell to you! End of discussion! Who knows what selling to a freak like you would do for my reputation!" I didn't notice Iruka's eyes widening, before he too began to glare.

"Listen lady! I preordered a freaking salmon! I have the receipt! It's already paid for, so just give me the damn fish!"

"Sorry brat." Her voice took on a cruel tone, "We sold it anyway." And with that, she slammed down the divider, officially closing the stall.

I banged on the metal gate. "Open up, you stupid lady! That's STEALING! HEY!" I kept it up for a few more minutes. "Fine! Screw you! I'll just go to the Aburame stall! Their stuff is better anyway!" I began stomp away but turned around for one last shout. "And cheaper too!"

I was halfway across the market when Iruka-sensei finally caught up with me. "Naruto… do things like that happen often?"

"Hm? Yeah, I guess so. All my life really. Most of the time, I'm with my sister though, and most of the merchants are scared of her." I shrugged, scuffing my boots into the snow. He looked surprised for a second. "Man, she's gonna be so mad!"

"That's right, you have an older sister, don't you? Honestly, I almost forgot."

I jumped into a rather deep snow drift. "'s okay Iruka-sensei. I don't talk about her much at school."

He gave me a small smile as we walked up to the Aburame stall. "Well, what is she like? Your sister?"

"Hi Shibi-sama! Shino! Nee-chan's great, sensei! She's super smart and pretty too!" The clan head nodded silently, whether in greeting or agreement was unknown.

Shino looked up from where he was supposedly doing his homework. "Hello Naruto. I see it's your turn for a home visit. Why? Because Iruka-sensei is behind you and carrying what appears to be a notebook."

I grinned, "Yup! He gets to follow me around for awhile."

"I feel so sorry for you sensei."

"What'd you say bug-boy?" I narrowed my eyes in Shino's direction. Sighing, Iruka stepped in-between us, prepared to stop any potential fights.

Finally, Shibi spoke. "Usual order Naruto?"

Blinking, I faced the clan head again. "Yes please! And could you throw in a salmon? The fishmonger refused to give me the one I ordered!" He nodded towards his son, who stood and went to the back room.

"Naruto, go pick out a fish. I wish to talk to Umino-san for a moment." I raised an eyebrow but shrugged and followed Shino. It was best to just listen the Bug King, as Sasuke and I called him.

* * *

Iruka gulped as he sensed for than saw Shibi stare into him. This afternoon had not been going according to expectations at all. First, he had been treated to ramen by a boy he had thought to be one of the most selfish, inconsiderate people on the planet, and that was without throwing in the whole 'demon in the gut' factor. Naruto had always acted that way, not sharing his food, the few times he brought his lunch, when asked or willing to help pay for someone else's lunch. But… he had paid for his meal today anyway. And while Iruka had been vaguely aware that some of the villagers disliked Naruto, he hadn't been aware that some would go so far as practically _steal_ from him, just for their own enjoyment. Iruka would have shouted up a storm until he got that damn fish, but Naruto had just yelled for a bit and moved on. He didn't even act surprised. And the way he just shrugged it off? It was…. Unsettling.

"You… You wished to speak with me, Aburame-sama?"

Shibi stood and went to the cash register, probably to ring up Naruto's order. Pausing for a second, he nodded to himself before pulling out a small bottle of honey and placing it on the counter. "You are to follow Naruto home today?"

Iruka startled, but nodded. "Hai. I'm supposed to observe his home life and make sure nothing needs to be corrected."

The Aburame nodded. "What do you know of Kishimoto Misaki, Umino-san?" The chunin gained a puzzled look and he elaborated. "Naruto's older sister. They are not related by blood."

"Oh, well, nothing really. Except for what Naruto just told me."

The clan head continued to ring up the purchase. "What he said is true. Misaki is wickedly intelligent, and rather good looking for her age group. You are the same age, so I assume you would know better than I. You are eighteen, are you not?"

His eyes wide, Iruka nodded, having not really processed the information. "W-Wait, Naruto's sister is only eighteen? But he's eight! Who took care of him before Kishimoto-san was granted custody?" Assuming his sister was a civilian, she would have been sixteen before being allowed to care for Naruto, as it was the age non-shinobi reached their majority.

"No one. She has taken care of Naruto since he was a babe, Umino-san."

The teacher's mouth was agape. "But that would have made her…"

"Ten when he was born, yes. If I remember correctly, she worked three jobs almost daily for his first few years."

"That's… that's... wow."

If Iruka could see behind the layers of fabric covering Shibi's face, he could have seen the small, proud smile gracing it. "Misaki has lived a hard life, Umino-san, for one her age. She was orphaned at six years old and saw her father die. Yet she smiles through it all. Life is looking up for her, Umino-san. Naruto is all she really has left. Don't take him away."

"B-But why would I have him taken away, Shibi-sama? If she's worked so hard to keep him, Kishimoto-san must really love Naruto." A frown had made its way onto the teacher's face.

"There are other factors that shall be revealed to you, but not by me. The children are returning after all." The Aburame leaned across the counter, the winter sun's light reflecting off both his glasses and the charm that decorated them. "But I will tell you this, Umino Iruka: Be kind to Kishimoto Misaki and her family, or you will find more than just a few spiders in your home come summer's return. She does not deserve mistreatment nor bigotry. Do we have an understanding?"

"Hey Iruka-sensei! Ready to go?" I shouted as I ran out of the backroom holding several bags of produce. He looked rather pale and I wondered what they had talked about. The chunin startled and nodded wordlessly. Okay, now I was super curious.

"Naruto, give my regards to your sister," said Shibi after I had handed over the money and he had wrapped up the salmon.

Quickly checking the bags, nee-chan had cuffed across me the head good the last time I had forgotten something, I gasped in delight as I saw the small jar of honey in the bottom of one. When the hell had he put that in there? Damn, Shibi was cool. "Thanks so much Shibi-sama! How'd you know nee-chan had a sore throat?" I didn't receive an answer from the kekkai-user, but it didn't matter. He probably wouldn't have told me anyway.

* * *

I went up the steep hill to the creepy house at a steady lope, not pausing for breath until I reached the top. It was part of our training, to be able to do it without stopping, no matter the weather. I was getting pretty good, even if the snow upped the difficulty by quite a bit. "Come on sensei! I'm cold!"

He groaned and grumbled as he crossed the hill's crest. "Oh _now_ he's cold. Not two miles ago, not even the last five." Iruka finally managed to catch enough breath to glare at me. I grinned, he'd be fine. "NARUTO! I swear, if all you've been doing is randomly leading me around the village, you'll wish you'd never bothered applying for the academy entrance exam!"

My grin widened even more. "Just one problem with that Iruka-sensei!"

"Oh?"

"I never took the exam!" I cackled in delight at his dumbstruck face and slid open the door to my nice, _warm_ house. "Tadaima! Nee-chan, I'm home." Soft footfalls began on the old hardwood and tatami. She'd been in her office, probably working on her new book. Something about a girl who could turn into a fish?

Iruka caught up with me, readjusting his grip on the paper bags he was carrying. "What do you mean you never took the ex-"

"Okaeri, Naruto-chan." And there she was, red hair down to her knees in thick waves and curls, loose for once, wrapped in a thick, soft sweater, her blue-gray eyes soft and full of love. Love for what? I didn't know, I'd like to think it was for me. But it seemed to fill her so much, surrounding her very aura, that I mostly thought I didn't deserve it.

Carefully, I put down my bags, slipped off my shoes, and immediately wrapped my arms around her middle. "Hi Nee-chan. How was your day?"

Her laugh echoed through my heart and I sighed happily. "It was fine Naruto, 'cept for my throat. But it seems you've brought home a stray."

Iruka stood staring, apparently dumbstruck, and I narrowed my eyes at him. After several moments, the teacher finally shook himself and bowed slightly. "Ma'am, my name is Umino Iruka, and I'm Naruto's homeroom teacher. The hokage has recently made it a requirement to do home visits every few years in the academy. Please, call me Iruka-sensei."

Nee-chan bowed back and laughed again. "I'd offer to shake your hand, but it seems your's are full and so is mine." She picked up a bag of groceries with her right arm, not wearing her sling for once. "My name is Kishimoto Misaki, Iruka-sensei. I'm Naruto-chan's sister and head of this household. Welcome to my home."

Rolling my eyes, I grabbed the bags of groceries and headed to the kitchen. I winked at Sasuke-teme as I passed the dining room. Scoffing, he rolled his eyes and continued working on his homework. "Nee-chan! Do you want your sling?" I called back down the hallway.

"Yes please! Thank you Naruto!" She and Iruka-sensei were still talking in the genkan*. "Please come this way Iruka-sensei. The kitchen is right down here." Quickly, I ran and got the faded, but still sturdy, burlap scarf from where it was laid to dry last night. Folding and tying the fabric with a practiced ease, I tossed it to the redhead on my way back into the rather cold kitchen.

"Hai..." I puttered around the kitchen, putting away the vegetables and the large salmon. Pausing momentarily, I took stock of who was in the house. My sense of smell was much better than my hearing, but you couldn't use smell to track someone in their own house. You'd just get confused. Let's see... Nee-chan, Sasuke, sensei, me...

Misaki walked through the shoji door and into the kitchen. "Hey, nee-chan, where's Sei?"

She placed the brown paper bag down on the counter and slipped on her sling. "Oh, he was sent on a last minute mission a few hours after you and Sasuke-chan left for school."

I grinned widely at her and nodded. "Ohhhh. Okay! Did he remember his cloak this time?"

My big sister winked at me and said, "I snuck it into his pack when he was rushing around, trying to find all the weapons you two hellions keep scattering everywhere." A muffled snort sounded from behind us. "Hey Sasuke-chan."

"You know, I think I understand what Hokage-sama meant when he said I wouldn't need to perform a visit at Sasuke's," whispered Iruka, staring intently at the Uchiha in question. The ebony haired child simply smirked and we shared a look.

"Naruto-chan, Sasuke-chan, how about you guys get some hot chocolate and head up to your room so that Iruka-sensei can ask me his questions." Shrugging, we did as told, making two piping hot mugs and heading up to the attic.

* * *

I made a pot of tea and led Iruka to the dining table. Sighing, I moved the stack of papers Sasuke had left to the side. "So Iruka-sensei. What would you like to know?"

Not wasting any time, he pulled out a notebook and pen. "Let's just start with the basics first. Obviously, I already have info on Sasuke and Naruto, but none on you, Kishimoto-san.

"Misaki, if you please, Iruka-sensei. And ask away." I took a sip from my cup, inhaling the sweet smell of black tea, lemon, and honey. I was honestly excited to meet Iruka. He was a good man, and teacher, who would potentially save my little brother's life.

He smiled at me. "H-Hai, Misaki-san. First question: How old are you?"

"I'm eighteen."

"Date of birth?"

"July 12th."

The teacher muttered to himself as he filled in the paperwork. "Hair? Red, shade four. Eyes..." He glanced up at me, widening my eyes so he could get a good look at the color, and tried to hold in a laugh. "Blue-gray, shade fourteen. Skin? Pale, two. Freckles, shades six and eleven, arms and face."

I took another sip of my tea and grinned at Iruka over the lip. "Enough detail for ya, sensei?"

He snorted. "Gomen, I hate having to be so thorough, but that's protocol for you. Okay, height?"

"177.8 centimeters*. And my weight is 72.9 kilograms*." He nodded and filled in both spots on the paper.

He flipped to another page. "Alright... How long have you been a resident of Konoha, Misaki-san?" He took a sip of tea from his own cup.

"Twelve years, since I was six years old."

He marked something down, "Which means you are not native to the village. Where were you born?"

I paused and thought for a second. It had been so long since I had been there, I couldn't remember the name of the small village I was born in. Did it even have a name?

"Misaki-san?"

I shook my head. "Gomen, Iruka-sensei. I was trying to remember. I didn't spend any more than a year in my village. I do know that it was a small one in the Land of Rivers, close to the border of Fire."

"It's quite alright. Father's name, occupation, and status?"

Sighing, I said, "Kishimoto Jinzaburo, carpenter, deceased."

Iruka wrote it down and looked at me. "My apologies, Misaki-san. I hope these next few questions don't stir up too many old wounds."

I shook my head. "It's alright Iruka-sensei. You're only doing your job. Besides, it was a long, long time ago." He nodded.

"That may be true, but it doesn't necessarily mean it doesn't mean it hurts any less. I lost my parents during the Kyuubi attack, and it still aches to this day."

He took another sip of tea and I poured the both of us some more. "That's... that's quite true."

Iruka thanked me and we continued. "Mother's name, occupation, and status please?"

"Kana, last name unknown, missing-nin from Iwa, status unknown but supposedly deceased."

"Is the Hokage aware you're the child of a missing nin, Misaki-san?"

I brushed my hair out of my face and smiled bitterly. "Hai, he is. She left when I little more than six months old. I have no loyalty to her, nor to her past village." Especially not when it was an Iwa nin that crippled me and killed Tou-san. I had no qualms against Iwagakure as a whole, only against those two. But they were dead, and so there was no reason to be angry. I still didn't like the village hidden in stone, but I held no ill will towards them either. My feelings on the matter were confusing, to say the least.

Iruka smiled back. "Okay then. Your classification, occupation, salary, and employer?"

"Civilian. I'm a writer, and make about 400,000 ryo excluding royalties. My contract is held by Drunken Toad Publishing." Why yes, it is owned Jiraiya, which means my children's books are published by a company famous for it's porn. I am surprisingly unbothered by this. Neither are my sales.

The teacher's eyebrows went up. "Drunken Toad Publishing? The company that distributes the Icha Icha series?" He coughed as I raised an eyebrow of my own, silently questioning his knowledge about such things. I couldn't care less actually, but he was fun to tease. "Not that I've read those books or anything." He coughed again. "Right. Besides yourself, are there anymore adults living in this house?"

A small smile made its way onto my face of its own volition. For some reason, I couldn't help but smile at the thought of Seitaro. "Yes, my best friend lives with us. He's a jounin named Yokoyama Seitaro. Unfortunately, Iruka-sensei, you just missed him. He left for a mission a few hours ago."

"Right, well. I'm sure Hokage-sama will be able to provide most of the information I need. Though I'd prefer to get some of it from you."

I nodded in agreement. "I'll do what I can."

"Okay, how old is Yokoyama-san? His date of birth?"

"Seitaro turned twenty-three on December 11th."

The teacher wrote that down. "And his height and weight?"

"185 centimeters and 80 kilograms.*"

"How long have you known each other, Misaki-san?"

How to put this? I couldn't just tell him Sei was ex-anbu. But I told him from when he retired, a few months ago, that was bad too... Hm. I smiled widely. "I've known Sei for seven years. We met at Sasuke's first birthday party." Not a lie, but not really the truth either. Perfect.

Iruka smiled back, though less energetically. "I see. I guess it's understandable to have such a long time friend living with you, especially when you have two young boys to care for."

"Seitaro has always been a huge help. He thinks of Naruto as a little brother. I honestly don't know what I would've done without him." Probably would have been killed, to be honest. But now was not the time to be thinking about such things.

"I'm sure you would have done fine, Misaki-san. Now, I just have a few more questions, and then I'd like to be given a tour of the house. Just checking to make sure there isn't anything too dangerous laying around or potential hazards. Is that alright?"

"That's fine. However, I will go ahead and say that this house dates back to the founding of Konoha, and is thus very old. We only moved in a few months ago, so it's still not in the best of shape."

Iruka nodded. "I'll keep that in mind."

* * *

We came to a stop in front of the attic door. "And up here, is where Naruto and Sasuke sleep."

Iruka looked a little confused. "Why don't they sleep down here, with you and Yokoyama-san?" He gestured back to the tatami-matted room we had just left.

"Well, mostly to preserve my sanity." I burst into giggles at the look on his face. "As much as both Sei and I love Naruto and Sasuke, we still need breaks from dealing with them. You see, apart, they're rather manageable. It's when they're together that makes you want to pull your hair out."

The teacher's voice was almost deadpan as he responded, "I don't know, Misaki-san. Naruto acts up quite a bit during class, while Sasuke rarely says a word, even when called on."

I smiled. "I assure you sensei, Naruto is quite well behaved at home. The academy simply doesn't provide him with enough stimulation to keep him interested for very long."

"What do you mean by that?" Iruka furrowed his eyebrows.

"Well..." I tapped my chin in thought. How to explain this? "The lessons are too long. Naruto's brain takes in and processes so many things in such a short amount of time that it's almost as if he never learns it all. He's not stupid, far from it actually. He's actually fascinated by math, for instance. He loves it, but he hates how you teach it at the academy. Naruto thinks you spend much too long explaining the steps. He doesn't understand that everyone else might not get it yet. Surely, you've noticed this?"

Poor Iruka, he looked a little shell-shocked. "Yes, actually. Depending on the lesson, he'll have either spaced out or be one of my most focused students. We had a similar conversation in class today, after break. He said he didn't need to be top in the class to beat Sasuke, as long as he knew the important stuff."

I laughed, "Yep, sounds like Naruto. Come on, let's make sure they haven't killed eachother or something. Those two have been far too quiet." Opening the door, I began to head up the stairs, Iruka following after me.

I smiled as I reached the top. The best friends were fast asleep at their kotatsu table, a plate of sliced tomato and a small bowl of orange peels beside their heads. The now empty mugs were balanced precariously on one corner of the table. Of course, the room was a mess already, most of said mess on Naruto's side. As long he picked up all his clothes before he went to sleep tonight, I wasn't gonna complain. I heard Iruka stifle a laugh behind me. There was a small piece of tomato in the uchiha's hair.

Naruto's side of the room was a little smaller than Sasuke's, having taken the area next to the stairs. There was just enough room to fit the blonde's 'kill me' orange and white futon and the old dresser we used to share. Well, and all of his plants. Over the years, Naruto had collected quite a few of them. And when I say a 'few,' I mean a few dozen. Since it was winter, every single one was inside.

On the other side of the room, directly underneath the window, was Sasuke's deep blue futon, along with his wardrobe. Both boys kept a small lamp and collapsible floor desk near their bed. Along with the kotatsu table the pair was sitting at, the only other furniture in the room was a bookcase, actually mostly filled on Naruto's side. It was rather cramped up here, but the two made it work. It had been rocky in the beginning, because Sasuke wasn't use to sharing a room. Luckily, he had adjusted during the month before we had moved in. One learned to share a space quickly in a crowded, one room apartment.

"Why is it so damp up here?" whispered Iruka.

"Naruto has to almost constantly mist his plants because of the dry heat the kotatsu causes." I said, pointing up at the half-empty spray bottle on one shelf, before tugging on his sleeve and leading him back downstairs. "He cares for them a lot."

Iruka rubbed the back of his head. "It's just... I never really pegged Naruto for the responsible type... But today, it seems as if all he ever does is be responsible. You trust him to buy groceries alone, for kami's sake. Half the time, I can't even trust myself to get groceries." I chuckled a little.

"Naruto... He had to learn to take care of himself from a very early age, Iruka-sensei." I plopped down on to a zabuton. "I was so busy working, trying to keep food on the table in those early years... I really wasn't there for him. It got a little better, when he was two and I began watching clan kids. But I was still concentrating more on them, then I was him." I sighed and rubbed at my forehead.

The brown haired chunin sat down, across from me, and smiled reassuredly. "But you did all of that, you worked so hard, for him, Misaki-san. And..." He leant forward and whispered, "I think he knows that." Sitting back, I let out a laugh.

"Ya think?"

Iruka nodded, "I really do. In school, Naruto gets into a lot of fights with a group of students in the year above him and Sasuke. He fights them because he always catches them bullying a certain student. This student has malformed chakra pathways and thus, can't perform ninjutsu and genjutsu."

Lee... "And he's bullied because of this?"

The teacher purposefully refused to look at my left arm. He had asked for the story behind it while he was questioning me. "Hai. Most people at the academy, students and teachers alike, believe he should just drop out..."

"And yourself?"

He sighed deeply before responding. "I'm... conflicted on the matter. I'm a teacher, of course I want him to succeed in his goals. And where he lacks in most shinobi arts, he absolutely excels in others. His taijutsu skills are nothing to sniff at, Misaki-san. He has wonderful potential, especially if he makes it to graduation and gets the right sort of sensei." Iruka paused and took a breath, as if overcome with a sudden realization, before smiling softly. "Sort of... sort of like Naruto, actually."

I smiled, "Well, no wonder Naruto feels as if he should protect this student, if they have such a disability. He's rather... sensitive about such things, as is Sasuke."

"Oh, I have noticed a few of his glares. I just thought he was angry at them for being loud..."

I burst into giggles. "Oh, I'm sure that wasn't helping!" He began to laugh as well. "Man, sometimes, I wish could go to the Academy and show them what a real disability looks like. I bet those bullies are civilian born aren't they?" He startled and looked at me as if I had just declared myself Queen of Pancakes and Tree bark. Laughing nervously, I asked, confused, "… W-What?"

He nodded enthusiastically to himself and shot out of his chair. "That's it, Misaki-san!"

"What's it?"

"That! You should go to the Academy and explain to the students what it's like living with a disability!" His grin was really starting to scare me a little. "It's perfect! You have an obvious injury, but it's not too gruesome either, like an amputation is..."

His idea hit me like a cannonball, and _I loved it_. I quickly stood as well and we shared identical smiles. I was really starting to like Iruka. "But it might as well be! And seeing as it happened when I was so young, they'll learn that a career-ending injury can occur before you've had a chance to start training!"

"You could go around, from classroom to classroom, so students can have a close look!" We high fived. Guys, I think I just made a new friend.

A loud, echoing thump from overhead interrupted our further planning/crowing, followed by irritable, unintelligible shouts from both boys. We burst into laughter. Oops...

 **Two Weeks Later...**

"Good morning students. For those of you not in my class, my name is Umino Iruka." said Iruka as I followed him into the auditorium-style classroom, and immediately had a flashback to my years in University. The first group, at my erging, was a combination of Naruto's class and Lee's, the ones I was needed in most. I was wearing what I would classify as one of my more... conservative outfits. Not that one could really be conservative in the middle of winter. A simple black tanktop, over which I wore a wool coat, sweater, and orange scarf, long tan skirt, grey leggings, and boots. I had forgone my sling for the day, though I had brought one of my nicer ones for the children to look at if they wanted. It was a cute enough outfit for winter, but still warm. I never usually cared about this sort of thing, but Sarutobi himself was sitting in on this class, so I had put in a little effort.

"Good morning Iruka-sensei!" responded the class in a deadpan, very practiced tone. I held in a laugh when I witnessed Sasuke roll his eyes and Naruto make funny expressions while mouthing the words. He looked constipated.

Iruka clapped his hands, far too cheerful and awake this early in the morning. "Well everyone, as you can see, we have two special guests visiting us today. First is Kishimoto Misaki, who will be speaking with you today about some rather important issues. And the Hokage himself has found the time to come as well. Please give them a round of applause." The clapping was a little weak-willed, and half-ass, but it was nice just the same. It had been years since I had spoken to such a large crowd, and the last time hadn't ended very well for me, unless you counted dying as a positive, so I was a little nervous.

Beside me, the Hokage stood and walked to the podium. "Thank you, Iruka-sensei, for the warm welcome. Now, I won't be speaking for very long, myself being rather interested in what Kishimoto-san has to say. All I ask of you, dear students, future of Konohagakure no Sato, please give her your undivided attention and respect." A small smile made it's way onto my face as several members of the audience sat up at Sarutobi's words, my boys included. The aging Professor took a step back and I soon replaced him.

"Thank you Hokage-sama, Iruka-sensei, for your kind words." They nodded and I turned to fully face my audience, taking in a deep breath. Stand tall. Look them in the eye. Know what you're talking about. You are the one in charge. _I'm in charge here_. "Hello everyone. As you might have guess from the multiple times it's been repeated, my name is in fact Kishimoto Misaki and I'm here to speak with you about something rather important. Something that could end your career as a shinobi, possibly before it's even had a chance to begin." I paused to let the children twitter. "Now first, I'll need a volunteer. Any takers?" A few hands did go up, but only one really stood out. "Yes, you, in the orange coat, in the back." He really was the best one to do help me with what I needed to do.

The blonde practically ran up the stairs and on to the stage. Placing his hands behind his head, Naruto grinned up at me, "Whatcha want me to do?"

I smiled back and asked, "Well what's your name?"

"Uzumaki Naruto, and I'm gonna be Hokage! BELIEVE IT!"

"Well, good luck then! Now, to make things easier, just call me Misaki, alright Naruto-kun?" He already knew ahead of time I wouldn't be able to treat him like a little brother during my presentation, so the blonde wasn't hurt in anyway.

The brat didn't even blink, he was so looking forward to this. "Sure thing, Misaki-san!"

Tugging off my scarf, I draped it over the podium and began unbuttoning my coat. Taking it off, I now pretended to fail at removing my sweater. "Now Naruto-kun, it seems as if I'm stuck. Do you mind helping me out of it?" The whole auditorium was laughing, except for the Hokage, Iruka, and Sasuke, of course. Like I said, a lot of the kids I used to watch have forgotten me, except for Shino and Kiba. I spoke and visited regularly with both of their parents after all.

"Sure thing, Misaki-san!" The room quieted almost instantly as Naruto removed my sweater with practiced ease and my scarred arm was revealed. To most shinobi, it wasn't all that bad, but to a civilian or academy student, the blackened skin across my shoulder that spread like some sort of twisted lightning bolt, fading as it reached my fingertips could be horrifying. Because it _was_. Naruto and Sasuke's lips twisted in resigned disgust at the scar. Like me, they hated the sight, but had grown used to it over the years.

Almost every child's eyes were wide, and someone was actually gagging. I smiled grimly and thanked Naruto. He headed back to his seat next to the last Uchiha and I faced the gathered students, looking as many as I could in the eye. Most flinched or refused to meet my gaze, but some, like Neji, Lee, Shikamaru, and, surprisingly, Sakura did, eyes never wavering from my own. When I next spoke, my voice was not raised, nor did I bother to use the microphone. It was so silent, I had no need to. "I was six years old." I stepped back from the podium and walked to center stage, so all could have a good view.

It was only then, did I raise my voice. "I was six years old! Only a few years younger than any of you!" I gestured around the room. "We have all been told stories, stories of the Sannin, their teacher and our Hokage! Tales of old and powerful shinobi who will live on forever in the legends they leave behind! We tell ourselves 'One day, I'll be a Sannin! Just like Senju Tsunade, or Jiraiya, or hell, even Orochimaru!' But as young as you all are, you haven't learned quite yet. To be shinobi like them, to have the amount of potential they had at your age and to grow as old as they have, is not to be the rule. It's to be the _exception_." I paced a little and came to stop in front of the section holding Lee's class. "Most shinobi are lucky to make it to twenty years old without either a crippling injury or just plain _dying._ "

I stormed back to center stage, taking in the shell-shocked faces in the crowd. Good, that meant they were listening. "I was six years old. It was in the middle of the Third Shinobi War, and I, along with my father, were being escorted to Konoha by a patrol team. They had caught us trying to illegally cross the border from the Land of Rivers, trying to find work. We were only a week out from the village when we were attacked by enemy shinobi. It was an ambush. During the resultant battle, I was stabbed in my left shoulder with a serrated kunai and my father was killed, leaving me orphaned and crippled. Only many months later, when I was still experiencing extreme pain and the minor necrosis surrounding my wound had begun to spread, was the truth discovered." I reached up and moved the sleeve of my top down so they could see the abscess that marked where the kunai had entered. "The kunai used to stab me not only ripped through any muscles it crossed, but had also been dipped in a poison. A poison combining the venom of both the brown recluse and wolf spiders, with minute traces of black widow as well."

If no one had been feeling queasy before, they certainly were now. I heard a sob. "It slowly dissolved the muscles in my arm and left me in such a state that near the end, I could not move a single finger without excruciating pain. It was at that point, my foster parents had a medic-nin at the hospital cut the nerves. Permanently."

"You're all probably asking yourselves, 'What does this have to do with being a shinobi? What does this have to do with me?' Am I right?" I asked, walking back to the podium. I fiddled with the microphone a bit, then slammed my hand down violently, sending a loud screech of feedback across the room. "IT HAS EVERYTHING TO DO WITH IT! I have been told time and time again that I would've been a good shinobi! You tease your classmates, tear them down for things they cannot help!" I looked Lee straight in the eye as I said this, and I could hear his small gasp of realization. "You call them _broken, useless, dropouts_!" I gestured widely, like a ringmaster preparing his audience for the finale, and felt _alive_. "WELL, NOW YOU KNOW WHAT A TRULY BROKEN PERSON LOOKS LIKE, CHILDREN! Because that's what you are. Children, who do not, cannot understand the hardships of others! To have a disability of any kind is to learn how to persevere."

I pulled my dark green, cotton scarf out of my bag, pre folded and tied, and put it on, the audience's eyes following my every move. "Eight years ago, my foster parents died, on the night of the Kyuubi attack. I was orphaned twice over, a crippled and homeless ten year old girl. Despite all against me, Hokage-sama gave me something that probably saved my life." Turning, I bowed deep and low in respect to the village leader, and received a smile and nod of the head in return. I faced the stands again and waved Naruto back down from his seat. I hadn't informed him of this part of my little speech, but for good reason. Blinking in surprise, the blonde eight year old made his to the stage. Gently, I placed my hand on his back and we bowed to the Hokage as one. "Eight years ago, I was granted custody of my foster parent's newborn son, Uzumaki Naruto." Gasps of surprise echoed across the auditorium. "And I don't think I will ever be able to truly thank you for that, Hokage-sama."

Sarutobi's eyes held a sort of softness to them, like a grandfather watching over his grandchildren as they played. "There is no need, Kishimoto-san, truly. I have done nothing but my duty as your kage." He bowed in return, not nearly so deep, but the fact he bowed at all was amazing.

"Thanks to the Konoha Orphans Act, I was provided a small, one room apartment on the west end of the village," I said, turning back to the room as a whole. Beside me, Naruto scowled at the reminder of our old place. I didn't blame him. It had been a shit apartment. "and I worked. I worked hard and long, three shifts a day, at three different part-time jobs. I wrote as well, long into the night, putting the ideas in my head down on paper. I am now a published author who owns a house to call home." Sighing, I hugged Naruto and sent him once again back to his seat. "I may not be a shinobi, and because of that, some of you might not care about me. But imagine this..." Slowly, I meandered back to the podium, leaving the children's thoughts to churn and stew. "Imagine..." I removed the scarf and placed my arm for them to see once more. Once Before, I had met an inmate who had survived being struck by lightning. Across his back and chest, a fractal burn scar spread, like frost on a window. The scarring across my own limb was much the same, except the raised lines had been blackened by the poison and decay. In my previous life, something like this was supposedly impossible, but it wasn't here. "… Imagine if such an injury were to happen to you? Or... to a loved one? Father? Mother? A sibling, or even a friend?"

"Would you be so cruel as to call them 'useless' or 'broken'? No! You would help them to the best of your ability, wouldn't you!? So... why would you treat a comrade that way? For something they can't help?" I sucked in a deep breath and I felt my shoulders finally relax. I had nothing more to say. I bowed once again, to both the children, Iruka, and Sarutobi, and gathered my things. I walked out without another word.

Not seconds after I made my leave, my chakra-enhanced hearing picked up the sudden explosion of whispers and I smiled, gently caressing Obito's pendant. It had felt good to make a speech like that again, after so long... I was making a difference again.

* * *

The boys and I waved Kakashi goodbye as he left our home, another successful dinner under my belt. It had been six months since I had finally managed to reconnect with the masked jounin and he came over about twice a month now, as long as he wasn't on a mission. Naruto and Sasuke had taken a liking to him within the first few visits and while they hadn't gotten along in the beginning, Kakashi and Seitaro were well on their way to being friends. I smiled brightly and skipped back into the house. It was late and there were dishes to clean up and children to stuff into their beds. Not to mention, a bottle of chilled mead to be finished up between Seitaro and I. A gift from Aburame Shibi for being one of his most loyal customers, perfect for a warm August evening. We, the adults, had opened it while the boys had gone to finish their homework, or in Naruto's case, half-ass it.

"Alright boys! Go wash up and get in bed, okay? You have school tomorrow," said Seitaro. The pair groaned but did as told.

Coming up behind the ex-anbu, I called after them. "And don't forget to brush your teeth!" Loud, put-upon sighs in response caused me to roll my eyes. Seitaro let out a low chuckle.

He began to pull out his hair tie. "Sometimes, it's easy to forget that they're so young and then they go and complain about brushing their teeth." Grunting, he struggled to pull it out of his hair. It had gotten caught amongst the strands of brown.

I bit back a laugh and lead him to sit at the couch. "Yeah, it's hard to believe. Some days, I wake up expecting to be back in the apartment and Naruto sound asleep in his crib." Seitaro's hair had grown longer since his retirement half-a-year ago, now touching his mid-back. Like my own red locks, his tended to eat things if it wasn't brushed regularly. This time, the victim was his poor hair tie. See, this is why I switched to hair pins.

"I hope you prefer it here?... Ow." He winced as I accidently pulled a little too hard at the stubborn elastic.

I smiled at the back of his head apologetically, even though he couldn't see me. "Well, of course I do. I love it." I paused in my attempt long enough that he could grab the bottle of mead off the coffee table and pour himself another glass.

"What do you like the most about living out here?" He took a sip and I finally freed his hair. Crowing in triumph, I took a swig of my own from the bottle before combing my rough fingers through his hair. It was so soft, I almost couldn't feel it because of my calluses. Seitaro sighed blissfully and leant into my touch, making me smile. Scenes such as this had become increasingly common over the last few months and we had both acknowledged we weren't exactly _friends_ anymore, but somewhere in-between a romantic and platonic relationship. But we were taking it slow, both of us having priorities that were more important than the idea of taking on a partner. Whatever this was, it would develop on its own.

I smiled softly as I mulled over his question. "I like that Naruto and Sasuke have space to train and run around without having to go to the village, where they'd just get glared or stared at. Or even spit on. They're both happier and more relaxed here. I love having the space to have a proper garden now and not just Naruto's plants. I love the space, the distance from the Market and the village in general. It's quiet too, it's not as hard to sleep as it was in the slums. No vandalism on our door, and the smell of putrid piss is gone."

Seitaro's golden eyes gazed into my blue ones. "Is there nothing you dislike about living here?"

"Well, the wildlife can be a pain in the ass." We both burst into giggles, his a little more slurred than my own. I was simply relaxed from the alcohol, but Seitaro was certainly tipsy. We were both remembering the scare from a month ago, when I had found the largest paw print I have ever seen right outside my office. One of the tigers had escaped from the Forest of Death and I had gone on a rampage until the seals were replaced and the giant tiger was captured.

Seitaro began humming, his tipsy brain really not helping when it came to his tone-deafness. It sounded vaguely familiar, like a long forgotten favorite song. I couldn't quite place it though. It was a whimsical tune that held whisperings of magic and a familiar feeling of awe. My fingers began to follow along with the hum, beating it's rhythm into Seitaro's skull, not that he seemed to mind. He was half asleep.

"Seitaro?"

His voice was muffled, head in my lap as it was. "Hmm?"

"Where did you hear that song? It sounds really familiar for some reason."

"-movie…."

A movie? I don't recall a movie with a theme like that. "What movie?" He grumbled unintelligibly and nuzzled into my lap. "Sei? What movie?"

"L-Lap-"He paused to yawn, "Laputa: Castle in the Sky…." And with that, he fell asleep.

I stared down at him, eyes wide with shock. Laputa? As in Studio Ghibli's 'Laputa'? As in the anime movie from _my_ world?! "Oh my god…" I muttered in english as I burst into sobs. _No way_.

* * *

 **1) Yes way. I just did that. Buwhahaha.**

 **2) Shibi is a scary motherfucker and I absolutely love him for it. That scene came out of nowhere, like most of this chapter. I love Aburame.**

 **3) I finally figured out just how Misaki lost use of her arm guys! Gross, I know. But I couldn't just let you guys guess as to why it happened forever. Well, I could have, but it was bothering me too.**

 **4) We got to see a little into Naruto's brain this chapter and just how much he's changed because of Misaki. Which is, admittedly, not much... If you checked the tags for this story on Ao3, you'd see it's a 'smart!naruto' fic. I enjoy them, so I'm writing one. Not to worry though guys, it's not gonna be a 'God Like!Naruto' fic. He is going to be as believably badass in this story as he is in canon... *snort***

 **5) genkan: japanese entry way. Duh.**

 **6) Y'all get an Omake this chapter as well!... Please don't be mad at me about the cliffhanger.**

 **7) And why yes, I do indeed have Itachi's couple for this fic figured out, as you'll see below.**

* * *

 **Fish are Friends, Not Food**

Itachi pulled on his new Akatsuki cloak as he followed Konan down the dimly lit hallway. The second-in-command was pretty enough, he supposed. In a sophisticated, put-together way, quite the opposite of Inuzuka Hana. Internally, he winced. She'd be angry with him, for missing their anniversary dinner... And the whole, you know, 'genocidal traitor' thing as well. It was Hana, and the Uchiha had never been able to discern her moods in general, let alone what caused her anger. She was a lot like her mother that way... absolutely terrifying. Maybe he could pick up a gift for her here in Amegakure and have Misaki give it to her? He'd ask in his next letter to the redhead.

"These will be your quarters when you are not out on assignment. You share them with your partner, Hoshigaki Kisame, a missing-nin from Mist. He should have already returned from his training."

Giving the blue-haired woman a short "Hn," Itachi nodded and walked into the room. It was simple enough, with two double beds on either side, with only one having any sort of bed covers. Blue ones. Damn, he'd have to buy his own. There were also two averaged size wardrobes, Itachi's obviously empty, and the other standing wide open with clothes spilling out of it like a waterfall. Kisame liked blue, and deep purple, quite a lot, apparently. His akatsuki cloak lay draped across one of two uncomfortable looking chairs, looking more like a curtain then any kind of clothing. Raising an eyebrow at the mess, and at the deep humming coming from the open bathroom door, where a shower was running, he hoped his new partner wasn't too much of a slob. Naruto had been bad enough.

The shower turned off, but the humming continued, until cursing started instead. "Damn it, forgot my fuckin' towel." Itachi couldn't help himself at the reminder of Misaki's last words to him, before he left the village. He snorted. Oops, looks like his new partner had good hearing. Excellent.

A large shadow appeared in the open doorway and Itachi's eyes widened minutely. This missing-nin from the Land of Water was taller than Misaki and even _Owl_ by at least two inches. And he was _blue_. And had _gills_. ' _Fish are friends, not food Ita-chan.'_ "Oi! You my new partner?" Itachi raised an eyebrow at the tall, _blue_ man's lack of modesty, but nodded. "Cool. Can you get me a towel? There's one on my bed." Through his fringe, the Uchiha rolled his black eyes but fetched it anyway. It wouldn't be beneficial to alienate his partner with seconds of meeting each other. Besides, kaa-san had made sure to teach him his manners, if nothing else. _Kaa-san..._

Itachi shook his head to clear it. Now was not the time for such thoughts. He quickly tossed the towel to Kisame and went about unpacking some of the many storage scrolls his rucksack contained. "Hn..." was his response to the mist-nin's mumbled thanks. He had brought along a futon, which he preferred over a sleeping bag while on missions, given the choice of course. They were far more comfortable. He sighed slightly as he spread it across the mattress, inhaling the pleasant scent of the fabric freshener both his mother and Misaki used on _everything_.

"So..." began Kisame as he pulled a large shirt over his head, "You're Uchiha Itachi eh?" He plopped down onto his bed, accidentally knocking the large bandaged sword leaning against the headboard to the ground. Both of the thirteen year old's eyebrows went up when said sword _growled angrily._ "Shiiiiit, sorry Samehada!" sputtered the shark-like man as he quickly corrected the sword and began channeling his chakra into the sword.

"Yes, I am Uchiha Itachi." While up there, he had seen stranger things happen around his older sister, and so Itachi just decided to go with the flow. "And you are Hoshigaki Kisame, previously of the Village Hidden in the Mist."

Kisame smiled, light from the ceiling fixture glinting off his sharpened teeth. "Hai, and also a member of the Seven Swordsmen as well." He patted the sword beside him, as if greeting an old friend. "This here is Samehada. I wouldn't recommend touching him unless you want all of your chakra siphoned out of your body."

Itachi nodded and reached into his pack, searching for something that had, of course, found its way to the bottom. "Noted."

"I never expected someone who killed their whole clan would own a futon that smelled like wildflowers and... " Kisame raised an eyebrow, amusement shining in his small eyes, "lemon? Some kind of citrus anyway."

"Hn... Ah." responded Itachi, having finally located the storage scroll full of food. He had sent Misaki a letter a month or so ago, requesting her assistance with such things. Itachi was good, possibly the best, at many things, but cooking was not one of them. Quickly unsealing two bento, he handed one to Kisame. It was getting late after all, and the thirteen year old hadn't eaten in several hours. If he had learned anything in the last twelve years since he had met Kishimoto Misaki, it was to never waste a good meal. And that it brought people together.

Kisame blinked, slightly confused, at the pale, slender hand holding out a bento box. He took it when said hand shook the box impatiently, and popped the seal. "Thanks Uchiha. I'm starving." The swordsman let his terror-inducing grin spread after sniffing and taking a small bite of rice. "This is really good..."

Itachi let a small smirk onto his face, hidden by his fringe though it was. "My... friend made it for me." He took a bite of his own food. "And you're welcome... fishface." He could hear his sister laughing in delight as the sound of Kisame's chopsticks snapping in half echoed around the room, and chuckled.


	10. Six Months and the Drums of War

**Disclaimer: Unfortunately, I have not been granted permission to own Naruto. Masashi-sama has yet to respond to my emails...**

 **WARNING: IMMINENT MULTIPLE TIME SKIPS.**

* * *

 _"Dear Misaki-nee,_

 _I have recently been granted membership of the organization Akatsuki, who claim to seek world peace, yet employ s-class missing nin from various villages. I admit to not completely understanding Leader-sama's thought processes on the matter. Seems rather contradictory to me, but alas. At least now I have a roof over my head, however temporary it may be until my new partner and I have 'suitably accustomed ourselves with the other's fighting styles,' as another member, Akasuna no Sasori, put it. A puppet user from Suna, though that is all he has bothered to reveal to me. You'd like him, he's extremely sarcastic and strange, like you. The other member, not including Leader-sama and his 'angel' Konan, is an old, supposedly immortal, miser hailing from Takigakure who calls himself Kakuzu. Neither of them have partners yet, though we shall soon be rectifying that for Sasori. A missing-nin from your ever-hated Iwa, named Deidara. I have yet to be informed as to how we will go about bringing peace to the shinobi nations, but it is my assumption it won't be in a particularly pleasant fashion. Pity really, though I'm sure you find the whole 'World Domination' aspect amusing._

 _Tell me, my dear sister, how it is that you always seem to know things you shouldn't? If I didn't know any better, I would think you were aware of my future partner and his... distinctive... features. Hoshigaki Kisame is indeed rather shark-like, with blue skin and hair, along with gills of all things. Actual working gills, on his shoulders of all places. He's also rather enormous, taller even then Owl. But at least he has good taste, as Kisame seemed to rather enjoy one of the bento you made for me. You've always told me that nothing brings people together more quickly than sharing a meal together. He didn't seem to like being called 'fish-face' though... Kisame is a little messy, but at least he keeps his mess contained in a general area. Specifically, his side of our shared quarters._

 _How is Sasuke? Is he doing well in the academy? I have the utmost confidence in him, of course I do, but it is nice to have it confirmed. Perhaps you could send along a copy of his next progress report? Speaking of progress, how are Naruto's grades doing? Hopefully, they are not as abysmal as when I left. Please tell me you've managed to stop him from wearing orange... And Owl? How is he? I heard he was retiring from Anbu soon, so I assume he must have by now?_

 _Any apology gifts you'd recommend me purchase for Hana that you would also be willing to deliver? Because I'm your favorite brother?_

 _Sincerely,_

 _One of Your Many Foolish Little Brothers,_

 _Uchiha Itachi_

うちはイタチ

 _P.S. Recently, I was perusing a bookstore and found a book written by someone named 'Kishimoto Misaki.' Thoughts, dear sister?_

* * *

"Bye Misaki-nee, Seitaro!" shouted Naruto as he and Sasuke stampeded out the front door. They were running late this morning, which meant hightailing it through the village to get to the Academy. They were much more eager to escape the house today than usual though. It might have been the stony silence between Sei and I. I hadn't bothered to wake him up after his accidental revelation the night before, and instead thought long and hard into the night about it. Should I just ignore it? Confront him about it? Leave it be until he decided to tell me? And from the look on Sei's face, he really was dismal at hiding his emotions around me, he remembered our little conversation as well.

I stopped my glaring at Seitaro and yelled back, "Be safe boys! Have a good day!" Once the door had slammed shut and their footsteps faded into the distance, I whirled back around, just catching the ex-anbu getting up from his zabuton. Slowly, he slid back onto the cushion. "So... Laputa, huh?" I began conversationally in english, not sure if I wanted him to actually understand me or not.

He sighed and raked a hand through his hair. "Misaki..." I felt my grip around my coffee cup tighten. He did know english. "Misaki... I meant to tell you."

"But why didn't you?"

His voice was low, and sad. "I was afraid... that I was wrong. That you weren't like me." That he was imagining things, or was alone in this world. There were quite a few things to be fearful of, in a situation like mi-… No, a situation like _ours_.

"What's your real name?" Mine, however, was cold as ice.

"My name is Yokoyama Seitaro Misa. You know it is. You know I can't lie to you."

I felt frustrated, angry tears welling up. I couldn't stop them, no matter how I much I wanted to. I hated crying. "You know what I mean!"

Liquid gold solidified and Seitaro slammed his hands down onto the low table. "Yours first!"

"You knew... You've known this whole time, haven't you? HAVEN'T YOU!?" I screamed back.

He roared, "I SUSPECTED! OF COURSE I DID! NARUTO DOESN'T HAVE A SISTER!" Seitaro's breathing was quick and ragged with emotion. "HE'S _NEVER_ HAD ONE! He wasn't friends with Sasuke until _after_ the formation of Team 7, and even then they weren't nearly as friendly as they are now. He didn't know anything about his parents, who certainly never took in a little girl!"

My breath was shaking too. He was right of course, those were all clues that _something_ was different. I didn't really care though, I was so _tired_ of hiding. "….. Kathy." I said, murmuring into my coffee. His head snapped up.

"What?"

We were still speaking english, and it felt strange to use after so long, "My name... is, was, Kathy Woodward. I died on December 11th, at thirty-five years old. I was assassinated by a shot to the heart while at a protest." A feeling almost like phantom limb pain spread across my chest, and I sucked in a breath. There was no reason for the pain in this world, but They apparently didn't want me to forget. I touched the birthmark over my heart and then grasped Obito's pendant. The metal was cold to the touch, despite the warmth of both my body and the room.

"Nathan Wilkes was an electrician who died at the age of thirty-six after being hit by a train in a Seattle Subway tunnel." Seitaro's voice was low, and held a slight bitterness to it. "A hot day, July 12th." We shared a look. I had died the day of his rebirth and he on mine. I had thought it a coincidence... I should have known better.

I laughed without humor and sipped my coffee. "Sick bastards, ain't They?" Letting out a surprised snort, the ex-anbu nodded. It was silent for several minutes after that, both of us contemplating this new development in our relationship. "…. What are we going to do now?"

He sighed and rubbed at his eyes, shaking his head. I glanced at him, before sighing myself. Carefully grasping my coffee cup, I moved over to his side of the table and placed it down again. Slowly, his arms found their way around my shoulders and I was pulled up against him, cheek pressed against his chest. The fabric of his plum colored shirt was soft to the touch. He kissed the top of my head lightly, and sighed deeply once again. "I... I don't know, Misa."

"You'll go with them right? On their dangerous missions?"

He chuckled, "Of course. There's no way in hell I'm going to let those brats get themselves killed."

I looked up and into his golden eyes. "Even Wave?" He held me even harder.

" _Especially_ Wave." It was probably the most infamous Arc in the whole of Naruto, that damned mission to Wave. It was where the fans got their first real taste of just how the world of Naruto worked. It was brutal, twisted, full of horrible, depraved people, such as Gato. Where we first saw the potential power the Kyuubi held, the badass villains the show was famous for. The sheer creativity of the battles, the jutsu, the awesome badassery that Kakashi and Zabuza had radiated throughout the entire arc. We saw Naruto's first use of what the fans had nicknamed 'Therapy Jutsu.' In my personal opinion, it was one of the best Arcs in the series, though I would admit to wearing Nostalgia Goggles when I had watched it again.

I elbowed him, ignoring his pained 'oof.' "Good, because if you die, I'll kill you." I picked up the cups containing the dregs of our coffee and went into the kitchen.

"That doesn't make any sense Misa-chan!" called Seitaro from behind me.

Smiling, I yelled back, "Well, I don't give a damn!" He appeared in the doorway, eyes full of amusement.

"I see how it is. I thought you loved me."

"Oh, is _that_ the feeling in the pit of my stomach? All this time, I thought it was just indigestion..."

The jounin pouted, "Hmmph. You don't get indigestion."

"Shut up."

He wandered over to the window and propped it open, just in time for a rather large crow to grace the sill. "Looks like you have a letter from Itachi..."

"Wha-? How did you-?" I began before realizing and rolling my eyes. "Damn you and your eagle eyes Seitaro." I took the offered claw and detached the small scroll, unrolling it. After feeding the bird a piece of meat, I began purposefully skimming Itachi's latest update on his adventures as a missing-nin. Not meaning to, I gasped tightly and sagged against the counter.

"What is it? What's wrong?" asked Sei, eyebrows furrowed in concern.

"He's in. He's joined the Akatsuki."

"Oh..." was the ex-anbu's response.

I snorted at his oh-so-intelligent reply. "Yeah." Well, there went my good mood.

* * *

 **Time Skip, Two and a Half Years Later. 1 Year Six Months until Canon.**

* _CRACK_ *

"Ow! Sei-ni, that hurt!"

 _*CRACK*_

"Would you just stop!?"

Seitaro's grin could be deemed nothing less than diabolic as he once again cracked the ivory whip over the heads over the heads of the two boys as the pair did a lap around the village. He was balanced rather precariously on the wall itself, using the tree-climbing technique of course, and happily using one of his longer battle whips. Specifically, the twenty foot one. "Run, my little minions, RUN! HAHAHA!" yelled the sadistic jounin, laughing maniacally.

Sasuke skidded to a stop and glared at the brown-haired shinobi. Scowling, he reached into his weapon's pouch and selected a kunai. In a single practiced throw, the knife went sailing towards the ex-anbu. Seitaro simply rolled his eyes and caught it nonchalantly, and tossed it back, handle forward. The 'Last Uchiha' grunted, scowl widening as the butt bounded off his head. Wordlessly, the jounin leapt off the wall, and used a laughing Naruto's head as a springboard.

Ignoring the blonde's complaining, he slapped the both of them upside the skull. "Come on you two, time for lunch." The sun was high up in the expansive blue sky, one of the many things that the Land of Fire was famous for. They had been training for hours, the boys working on their speed and dodging, while Seitaro took the opportunity to work on hitting moving targets. Specifically, small ones.

Naruto jumped up and down excitedly, "Yatta! FOOD!" It wasn't long before he was nothing more than an orange speck in the distance. As one, Seitaro and Sasuke sighed.

"See, why can't he have that much energy during training?" questioned Sei as he rolled up his whip, a sweatdrop forming on his head. Sasuke only shrugged. He really didn't talk very much these days. The ten year old was of the opinion that his family did enough talking as is. Besides, Naruto could usually speak for Sasuke anyway, and often did. So why bother? Seitaro simply smiled and ruffled the boy's hair, making his scowl widen even more.

I looked up from where I had been gardening and wiped my hand on my apron. The boys were apparently done with training today. Smiling, I stood and meandered back inside. It was hard work, gardening with only one hand, but I managed. It was a past time I had enjoyed in my first life, having found weeding rather relaxing. Of course, in the Naruto World, only the ridiculously rich had a bed of only flowers, so my new garden mostly contained vegetables and herbs, though they weren't nearly the same level of quality that the Aburame produced, so we still visited their stall regularly. Somehow, Naruto had convinced Shino to come by and rid it of harmful insects once a month, so it did do quite a bit better than most other peoples'. This year, it was particularly bountiful, because Seitaro had risked going into Training Ground 44 to gather some soil. Even now, the area was rich with the potent chakra of the Senju clan, and because of that, my garden thrived. As long as nothing grew fangs or something, I was happy.

"How was training?" I asked over lunch, curiosity peaked by the various welts, cuts, and general bruises on all three of them. In my old life, such injuries would have induced a trip to the hospital. Now, I just threw a first aid kit at their heads and told them to mop up the blood dripping onto the floor. How things change.

Seitaro smiled proudly, "I'll have to see if any jounin are open to giving Naruto some tips or even a recommendation to go into the Espi Squad once he makes chuunin. His trap skills are phenomenal. He actually got me a couple times." Briefly, he reached to feel the thin, yet moderately deep, scratch on his cheek. Epsi Squad, otherwise known as Konoha's Espionage Division, was infamous for its technically under-the-table missions and its skilled operatives that no one really knew was a member. Similar to both Anbu and the Intelligence Division, Espi took care of some of the more underhanded requirements of being a shinobi, like blackmail, corporate AND government sabotage, and lots of other nasties. Anbu was normally assassinations, while Intelligence was almost purely spies. All three hid their member's identities, for security reasons of course, yet Espi was probably the most secretive of the bunch. If you knew someone well enough and they were in Anbu, you could probably tell by their hair alone, if it was unique enough. Like Kakashi. Even Iruka was rumored to be a member of Anbu, from what Sasuke and Naruto had told me. Personally, I'm pretty sure that if he was secretly in any of those groups, it was probably Espi. Iruka was no slouch at traps either.

Sasuke snorted into his water. "If Research & Development doesn't scoop him up first." He had a point, actually. Naruto had begun to show a rather startling ability to improve and adjust seals on the fly, and had even started making his own custom sealing scrolls and exploding tags. When Jiraiya finally got his mitts on my little brother, the old perve was going to have a field day. I just looked forward to seeing the old bastard again after so long.

Naruto looked up from his food, slurping the last little bit of instant ramen into his mouth. The rest of us had simply gone for sandwiches, but the blonde had insisted on ramen for his mid-day meal. Like that was surprising."Wu-? Ju gos takling 'bout me agun?" Sasuke made a face and scooted to the side, away from his best friend and the flying bits of food.

"Chew your food, Uzumaki Naruto." I jabbed my chopsticks at him to make my point. The blonde quickly swallowed the noodles and repeated his question.

"Are you guys talking about me again?"

"Yep. We're thinking about throwing out all of your ramen and replacing it with _boiled turnips_." responded Seitaro, causing Naruto to scream in horror and go hide his stash. The boy hated turnips, especially when they were boiled. Of course, he hated vegetables in general.

I shook my head as both males let their heads hit the table, bodies shaking with laughter. Bringing my coffee to my lips, I smiled.

* * *

 **Time Skip, Six Months. 1 Year Until Canon.**

"Whaaaaaaaaaaaat?! You're leaving for how long!?" exclaimed Naruto, sapphire eyes looking up at both jounin. Sasuke wasn't too pleased about this development either, from the ever-deepening frown on his oh-so-pretty face. The sun had only just began to peek over the horizon, pre-dawn light reflecting off the jounin team's headbands. The boys had insisted on seeing them off, even if it meant getting up ridiculously early on a school day. Normally, I saw Sei or Kakashi off by myself, but with the both of them leaving? I was glad Naruto and Sasuke had decided to accompany me. I was so proud of them, I really was. I couldn't believe they were only a year from graduating the academy... a year from the beginning of Canon. The beginning of the end of the World. Wow, that sounded really fucking dramatic. I've been spending far too much time around these damn ninja, remind me to slap myself later.

Sasuke looked much the same at eleven as he would at twelve, unfortunate haircut and all. However, I had refused to let him wear the traditional high-collared top most Uchiha children wore. It had the fucking clan symbol on the back, practically screaming 'HEY! LOOK AT ME~ I'M SPEEECIIAAAL~~~' I understood why he wanted to wear it, but I was much more concerned about his survival. He had been pissed at me for days, even after I had explained. He understood, and even agreed with my reasoning, but he still wasn't happy about it. But the boy calmed down after I bought several yukata tops in various colors, like the kind Fugaku had worn off-duty, and had the symbol sewn on in discrete locations on the fabric. Turns out Sasuke didn't really care where the symbol was as long as it was there. The short sleeved shirt he wore most often was charcoal grey with yellow borders, with standard fishnet underneath, and tied with a white obi. With the top, he also wore fingerless gloves, though the one on his left arm, which was the one he often blocked with, was actually an arm guard that reached his elbow. His pants were standard issue, though a pale blue, instead of navy. He was considering attaching his father's headband to the obi after graduating, which I thoroughly agreed to help with. Even though he wasn't actually supposed to carry around weapons of any sort, being still in the academy, Sasuke had recently started keeping his bow and quiver with him at all times, though sealed away in a small scroll hidden in his obi. I certainly wasn't going to stop him. Constant vigilance and all that.

Naruto, however, looked about as different from his canon self as I could possibly get him. Throughout his whole life, I had kept his hair trimmed short, much shorter than it was supposed to be. Part of this was practicality, and the other was because the blonde looked far too much like his father already, and we couldn't afford to risk it. I mean, as far as Sei and I knew, no one had managed to figure it out in canon, but I hadn't _existed_ either. People knew me, knew my connection to the Fourth. Kushina hadn't bothered to hide her pregnancy. It wouldn't take much to connect the dots, so Naruto's hair was short. I couldn't do much about that smile of his though, which was so Minato my heart twinged when I saw it. Naruto actually dressed rather similarly to Sasuke, mixing traditional with the standard attire most Konoha shinobi wore, except his top was orange with cream borders, and he really did wear the standard pants. He had never had such a need to draw attention to himself, despite the antagonistic attitudes of the villagers, because he got it at home, and so, had never bothered to wear a solid orange jumpsuit. Orange was still his favorite color though, that hadn't changed. Both boys wore their clan symbols, no bigger than a coin, somewhere along the bottom of their shirts. It varied from top to top actually. Vaguely, I wondered if there was some way to convince Sakura to wear a similar outfit when Team 7 formed, to give them a sort of 'team thing.' Maybe if Sasuke suggested it? Though, now that I looked carefully, the outfit reminded me of the standard Ame shinobi uniform...

Kakashi sighed, "At least two months, probably more. It can't be helped. Orders are orders, and this is a long-term assignment." Beside him, Seitaro nodded and adjusted his pack. He really hadn't spoken very much at all this morning, being a grumpy-gus about going on such a long mission.

Sasuke's pitch black eyes stared at the pair, team leaders for this mission, steadily, hands stuck in his pockets as usual. "You promised to help us study for the graduation exam." You almost couldn't tell he was truly upset about it. This upcoming one was when Team Gai was supposed to graduate, and neither of them were really ready for it. Sasuke still couldn't get his clone to match the shade of his clothes, or even move correctly without failing. Naruto couldn't even _make_ a clone yet, even though he'd been practicing for months. But they wanted to at least try, so I granted permission to let them take the exam. There's no harm in trying.

"I'm sorry guys, but like Kakashi said, orders are orders. Trust me, given the choice, I wouldn't be going." said Seitaro, finally speaking up. He hated leaving us unprotected, even if it wasn't his job anymore. Old habits die hard, I guess.

Naruto frowned, making a funny face, and Sei cocked his head to the side in affectionate amusement. It was nice to see. Either I had simply grown used to the action over years, completely possible, or the ex-anbu had stopped doing it. Finally, Naruto lunged forward and grasped Seitaro across his middle, tugging Sasuke into the hug as well. Sei had been a part of Naruto's life for as long as the blonde could remember, whether as his ever slightly disturbing 'Owl-niisan' or 'Sei-nii,' the man had been a constant fixture. Sasuke and Seitaro were close as well, in a different way, not quite brothers, but also not friends. They were… fond of each other, I suppose. The only person Sasuke could bring himself to call 'brother' besides Itachi was Naruto, and then only sometimes.

My family wasn't the only one making a similar scene though. Many of the other jounin were saying their goodbyes to friends or lovers. I walked up the Kakashi, letting my other boys have their goodbye, and kissed him on his masked cheek. Then I gave him a nice swat on the other. "You come back now Hatake. Hear me?"

"Of course Kishimoto. Don't I always?" asked the silver-haired man before eye-smiling at me. I smiled back and swatted his cheek again, then switched places with Sasuke and Naruto. That was all that needed to be said between the two of us.

Seitaro finished tying his headband as I walked up to him. He didn't often wear it, unless he was going out of the village. Like most, he wore it across his forehead proudly. It also had the benefit of holding back his long bangs. Cocking his head at me, a small smile spread across his face, but his golden eyes held nothing but softness. "Hey..."

My heart felt like snapping and I fought tears. "Hey." Seitaro slowly grasped my hand in both of his, and we touched foreheads, simply basking in each other's presence for a moment. _This_ is why I hated seeing him off, the feeling of my heart about to shatter into a million pieces at even the thought he might not come back. But it was even worse if I didn't come, because what if I really didn't see him again? Because I wasn't there to say goodbye? So come I did. I breathed in his scent, trying to truly imprint it into the back of my mind. Ozone and leather oil and iron. Blood... The very things I smelt every day, whether after a lightning storm, or when he returned from training. Together, on his person, they collected and made such an addicting aroma, it made my head swim and the hairs on my neck stand on end. His chakra, what little I could sense of it, was like the static left behind after rubbing a balloon on your head combined with that at-peace feeling you got when looking up at the sky on a clear autumn morning. Crisp, and cold.

We had only been together for a little over a year, yet it felt like a lifetime. As I suspected, living in true proximity to each other brought out our true feelings, which were decidedly not platonic. He was still my best friend, and I his, but it was in the way lovers were. We could be away from each other, had to be, for extended periods of time. We had never really had a honeymoon phase like a lot of couples, probably because the both of us were mentally well into our fifties at this point. And if it didn't work like that, we were still in our thirties, either way, we hadn't been all mushy about it. Hell, we couldn't even tell _when_ we got together. Sometime between New Years and my twentieth birthday, but otherwise? Not a fucking clue. I like to think that pretty much summed up our entire relationship though. The 'clueless' bit, not the whole 'we weren't mushy-wushy' part.

"Hey..." My blue eyes snapped open and met his, "Don't worry about me. I'll be fine Misa." He placed a gloved hand against my cheek and I grasped it. They were thicker than most shinobi gloves, though they didn't heed his dexterity at all. I could almost feel the thin lining of rubber between the layers of fabric.

My voice was raspy from holding back tears. "Just... Please, just try and come back to me." Simultaneously, we looked to the ten year olds, one of which was cheerfully yammering Kakashi's ear off. "… to _us_."

Seitaro nodded and our foreheads met once more. "I'll try. Kami above, I know I'll try."

The boys and I knew that it was impossible for a shinobi, especially jounin, to promise to come home. We took what we could get though. "I love you..."

He kissed me, short and sweet, but so full of love. We were running out of time. Pulling away, he whispered, "I love you too. Be home soon." And with that, the team was gone, leaving not a trace but a sudden strong breeze.

No one was there to hear me but the wind, but I said it anyway, hoping it would carry my words. "You better."

It was only then did I let my tears fall and felt the arms of Naruto and Sasuke wrap around me.

* * *

A month passed, and we worried just in general.

Two, and it was much the same.

Three months passed, with no word whatsoever, and we were concerned.

Month Four found the hokage pacing irritably in his barricaded office and concerned loved ones trying to break down the whole tower.

But they still weren't back.

It was a total of six months before the team returned.

In that time, Sasuke and Naruto had failed the exam not once, but twice, and I published two more books. Much like the chunin exams, academy graduation happened every six months, so it'd be another half-year before That Exam. My books were selling well, not quite best sellers but getting there. They were popular with civilians and shinobi alike, simply because they were some of the few books decidedly not propaganda, and the fantastical tales of my old world were like nothing ever seen before. For all their shinobi of the fucking _Moon_ and ability to walk on water Jesus-style, the people here were extremely uncreative. The Icha Icha series was pretty much the best you were gonna get, and it read more like any trashy romance novel you could find in the bargain bin of a Books-a-Million than anything actually containing substance. The books I wrote detailing the adventures of the many Studio Ghibli movies I had enjoyed in my old life were steadily climbing the ranks. Magic as a concept didn't exist in the Naruto world, and was thus found fascinating. Several times, I'd been asked if it was actually just chakra abilities, and I found myself stumped. How to explain something so ingrained into me and my past culture to someone who had never heard of it? Impossible, in a way.

When Seitaro and Kakashi returned, it was late in the night. Witching hour. The boys had long since been sent to bed, and I had just lay down myself when the sound of a key in the lock echoed through the house. The front door slid open and I nearly burst into to tears as the pair whispered to each other, probably exhausted yes, but _alive_.

"You know, I do actually have an apartment. It has a bed and everything." Kakashi...

"Yeah, but you don't have any food remember? Misaki donated it all to the Allied Mother's Force before we left." Seitaro.

I did start to cry when the pair came into the tatami-matted room that Sei and I shared. You know, for someone who abhors crying as much as I do, you'd think I'd do it less.

Seitaro had dark rings around his eyes, which were also dull with sheer _tired_ from the long mission. I didn't know what the assignment had been, and I really didn't want to. I didn't care, because he was home and in one piece and alive. I sat up in my futon, the same floral-printed one from my childhood with Minato and Kushina. It was getting a bit ragged, of course, but I couldn't force myself to replace it. "Long time no see strangers." I whispered into the dark room, drawing tired chuckles from both jounin.

"Hey Misa..." began Sei as he grasped onto my hand with his own and we touched foreheads for the first time in months. The metal of his forehead protector was cold against my skin. We didn't really do kissing, strange for a couple, I know, but neither of us actually _liked_ kissing. "Is it okay if Kakashi and his mutts stay the night?"

Kakashi pouted sleepily. "They're not mutts..."

Laughing quietly, trying not to wake the boys, I nodded. "Sure Kashi, as long as they don't make a mess." He eye-smiled and I rolled my eyes as the pack appeared in the shoji-door. Figures. The bastard knew I couldn't say no to housing a few dogs.

"Don't worry girl, he's house trained." said Pakkun, jerking his chin in Kakashi's direction. Quickly, the rest of the dogs herded themselves together, most asleep before they actually had time to settle down. Even the hounds were exhausted.

I raised my eyebrow, "It was so hard to do, wasn't it?"

"You got no idea." He padded over to Bull and flopped into the large dog's side.

Smiling, I told Kakashi were the spare futon were kept and Seitaro quickly undressed down to his undershirt and boxers before joining me under the comforter. I had long since expanded my old futon by simply laying another mattress down next to it, even if he'd been gone for months. It was unusual for couples to share futon, but it was a leftover habit from our old lives and we honestly didn't care. I kicked him to get his fucking _ice cold_ toes away from me. He whined, but the appendages were removed from my person. Boyfriend, lover, or whatever, Sei had long since learned by heart my threats for when he did that. Usually, they involved the separation of the offending toes from _his_ person instead. The rustle of fabric from my left sounded as Kakashi unfolded a spare futon, printed with red plaid.

It was quiet for several more minutes as the last Hatake undressed, mask being removed and all, before anyone spoke again. Growing tired, I finally snapped. "You both look like shit." The pair on either side of me let out startled chuckles. Several of the dogs huffed as well.

"Gee, thanks," was Kakashi's blasé response, muffled as it was with the covers over his head. A habit leftover from his own childhood, I suppose. Or he was performing a preemptive strike against curious eleven year olds. Maybe both.

Lazily, I fell back onto the mattress and curled into Sei's side. "Seriously, I've seen roadkill look more alive than you two. What the hell is wrong?" The large hallway clock began chiming, declaring to the world that it was three in the damn morning. One of these days, I was gonna take one of the boys' kunai and kill that damn thing. It was a writer's enemy, a clock like that.

Seitaro wasn't exactly coherent at the moment either. "Don' worry 'bout it Misa. Jus' chakra exhaustion…" he said, murmuring, "Got the rest fixed up a' the hospital…"

Kakashi yawned and added, "Nothing that a few decent meals and a good night's rest can't fix."

I rolled my eyes and thumped both jounin with the book that had kept me up so long into the night. "Then go the _fuck to sleep._ "

Both knew better than to disobey my orders. I had them trained so well.

I awoke to the sound of those thrice-damned birds chirping and a warm body in my bed. I had honestly expected it to be a dream, but it hadn't been. They really were back, both of them. Someone, probably Sasuke, he was a sweetheart like that, had opened the shoji doors to let in the sun. I could hear some kind of meat frying in the kitchen. My stomach growled as the smell hit. Mmmm, _bacon_.

"Whoever's making bacon this early in the morning better not think they're getting any," mumbled Sei, having apparently woken up as well.

I laughed softly. "Oh? Why is that?"

"Because I'm going to eat it all." Came Kakashi's terse reply. "And then I'm going to slaughter those evil birds." I would have believed him if he had actually gotten out of bed yet. To think, this lazy man was deemed dangerous enough to have a 'kill on sight' order in the Bingo book.

Seitaro sat up, blanket pooling around his waist, to glare at the usually-masked-nin. "Fuck you're not. Get your own bacon!" Kakashi glared back, having actually stuck his eyes out from under his covers. Rolling my eyes at their antics, I scooted out of the futon, and pulled on my robe and slippers. Morons. If anyone was getting any bacon this morning, it was _me_.

Nimbly skipping the creaking board on the path to the kitchen, I kissed Naruto on the head on my way to coffee pot, which was happily gurgling away. "Thanks for making breakfast sweetie."

The blonde waved the spatula in his hand cheerfully, and grinned. "No problem nee-chan! I figured since you always make breakfast, it was my turn. Sei and Kakashi are finally back too, so now it's time to celebrate!" I smiled back. Naruto really was a sweet boy. However...

"Uh huh... And what about the fact it's way past time for the both of you to be in school?" He just grinned mischievously and went back to cooking breakfast. I rolled my eyes.

The back door opened and entered Sasuke, carrying a basket of food from the storage cellar. "Oh Misaki, you're awake." He greeted as he placed the wicker basket onto the counter. Smirking, he grabbed a potato and tossed it at Naruto's head. There was an indignant squawk that we both ignored.

"Morning Sasuke." I kissed him on the head as well, though only because he had pushed into my outstretched arm by an irritated Naruto. He hated it when people bothered him while cooking, much like I did. Momentarily, I considered torturing the ebony-haired preteen by holding him in my grasp a little longer, but ultimately let him go. The boy couldn't help with breakfast if I was hugging him after all. That's right. I had my priorities straightened out. I mean… it's _bacon_.

There was a zombie-like groan from the doorway as I settled into my normal seat at the head of the low table. Oh yeah, fuckin' _matriarch_. "Coffeeeee... oh glorious caffeine." said Seitaro, shuffling into the kitchen and pouring himself some of the aforementioned liquid. Not even bothering to turn away from the pot, he quickly downed his cup. "Ah, that's the good stuff..." Sighing deeply in bliss, he poured himself another cup and then sat down heavily on the cushion next to me.

Sasuke raised an eyebrow. "Do you want me to get down your chakra pills Seitaro?" Over the years, Sasuke had become the one to really notice when anyone was in need of medicine. He'd never be a medic, his chakra was far too volatile and 'physical' for that, but when it came to first aid, the uchiha was the best in our family. To be any good at medical jutsu, your chakra has to lean more towards the spiritual naturally. Yes, over time, you could train it, but you'd still never be all that good. Sasuke was interested in healing, yes, but he was much more a front-lines fighter. He liked to be well-rounded and it was always could to have a back up in case something happened to your team medic.

The jounin nodded and began massaging his temples. "Yes please, and some headache relief while you're at it. Thank you Sasuke." He always gets a headache when running low on chakra. Pretty much, his body went 'Haha, FUCK YOU!' after particularly grueling missions, and so Sei kept a rather large collection of over-the-counter chakra pills, because while his stamina is nothing to sniff at, the level of chakra Seitaro has is rather average for a jounin. Chakra pills are very similar to the military ration pills used in the field, but instead are purely for helping replenish your chakra. They can't do shit unless you take them regularly, eat plenty of food, and sleep like the dead for a week, unlike ration pills which keep you at the very least standing for three days. In theory anyway/

The boy shrugged and handed him both bottles. "No problem." He then turned to me. "Naruto and I are getting together with some classmates after the Academy lets out to do a project on information collection. No one else in our group has enough room, can we work here?"

"Depends on how many there are, and just how quiet you lot can be. Kakashi and Seitaro are going back to sleep as soon as they finish eating." And with timing so perfect it must have been on purpose, Kakashi finally meandered into the room and plopped down onto a zabuton just as Naruto was carrying in breakfast. The thing about post-chakra exhaustion meals is that they have to be extremely calorie dense, so a traditional breakfast just wasn't going to cut it. Not that we minded all that much, as none of us actually liked the idea of soup first thing in the morning, especially during the warm months. There were a few things, like onigiri and grilled trout straight from the river leading out of the Forest of Death, but there was also bacon and a few omelets stuffed with cheese, tomato, and other vegetables. As a civilian, I didn't need to eat as much, so I just grabbed a couple onigiri, a piece of fish, and some bacon, leaving the rest of the large meal to my boys.

Already digging in to an omelet, Seitaro tossed the bottle of chakra pills to Kakashi, who deftly caught it and dry swallowed a capsule. By now, both Sasuke and Naruto had grown accustomed to the idea that Kakashi's face would forever be a mystery to them and so simply turned the other way when the masked-nin wanted to eat. Oh, they still gave it a try every once in awhile just for the principle of the matter, but it wasn't their number one goal in life anymore.

Sasuke shrugged and sipped his water. "There's about maybe six of us total, including me and Naruto." He began counting off his fingers, "Me, Naruto, Shino, Kiba..." He trailed off.

It was Naruto's turn to chime after swallowing his mouthful of food, "Choji, and Shikamaru too." I raised an eyebrow in surprise. Almost none of the boys in that group were particularly motivated when it came to academics, barring Sasuke and Shino. But while Sasuke was most certainly in line to be Rookie of the Year, the young Aburame kept his grades happily in the middle, none being either too high or too low. On paper, Shino was perfectly average. He wasn't of course, and if you'd ever met the boy, it was obvious he was tanking his grades on purpose. Paranoid, just like his father.

"Oh? And Iruka-sensei just _let_ you pick a group like that for an assignment?" I asked. That didn't sound like something the chuunin would do. He was smarter than that. Admittedly, all of the boys in that group had to potential to be some of the best minds, or at least shinobi, the village had ever seen. Shikamaru, of course, was doomed to be Naruto's Jounin Commander, the rest to be rather exceptional clan heads, especially if my meddling went the way I wanted it to and Hana became an Uchiha. At this point, she was still heir-apparent, as the oldest, but again, meddling. Anyway, the group, at this point of time, even so close to graduation, was almost entirely made up of slackers, excluding Sasuke. There was no point in it letting them group together like that. As a teacher myself, once upon a time, I had learnt that lesson the hard way.

Naruto shook his head. "Nah, Mizuki-sensei is the one who put us in groups. Iruka's been sick." Sasuke nodded in agreement.

I felt my smile sharpen and heard the creak of my chopsticks as they strained under the pressure of my hold. Mizuki... The very thought of him made my blood boil. There are not many people in this world that I would call 'irredeemable.' Naruto had seen to that himself, personally, for the most part. But if there was such a person, Mizuki would be the first one who came to mind. Oh, how I despised him. This was a man who's sole purpose in life was to be a lying, manipulative, _murdering_ son of a bitch, hungering only for power and fulfilling his own twisted ambitions. He had killed a teammate while on a mission simply because they hurt their leg. He tried to kill Naruto and Iruka, not once, not twice, but three times. Mizuki had simply strung along his poor fiance, a woman who loved him with all her being, until she herself could have been considered a traitor, and was by some people, simply for almost marrying him. He made Iruka's life a living hell, all the while pretending to be his friend. And _he wouldn't take no for an answer_. As I discovered at the last parent-teacher conference I attended. Yeah, loyal fiance _Kurama's_ left ass cheek...And not the pretty redhead from Yu Yu Hakusho, either. Actually, as constructs of pure chakra, do the biju even _have_ asses?... Did they have basic anatomy period?... Hmm, note to self, ask the Sage of Six Paths, or at least have Naruto ask for me... These were important questions people.

I took a sip of coffee as calmly as possible. "So... what's Iruka have anyway? Maybe I'll bring over some soup next time I get the chance."

Both boys winced. "You might not want to do that. He's got food poisoning." explained Sasuke at my confused expression.

"Yeah nee-chan, that'd just be mean..." responded Naruto. I rolled my eyes.

"Oh, I'm sorry. How cruel of me, to tempt an unknowing Iruka with non-existent soup." I said in a deadpan voice.

Seitaro and Kakashi snorted in amusement, though the silver-haired nin almost choked on a piece of egg. Sasuke, as usual, simply smirked his glass of water, _that boy drinks so much and yet NEVER NEEDS TO FUCKING PEE,_ while the blonde beside him burst out into loud guffaws and fell over. Whether the pair of were laughing at my sarcasm or their future sensei's near death, I didn't know. But I was reminded of my personal favorite of the many infamous sayings in the Land of Fire. I had seen much evidence in support of it over the years, first with this pair's mothers, and themselves. I assume there must have been a rather _spectacular_ story behind it, seeing as it dated back to around the time Mito and Madara should have met for the first time.

" _Mixing an Uchiha with a Senju brings you nothing but pain and suffering._

 _The results are much the same after bringing together an Uchiha and an Uzumaki, but you're more likely to die laughing, even as the buildings around you are in various stages of 'on fire.'_ "

 _-Senju Tobirama_

Poor Tobirama. Truer words have never been spoken.

* * *

"Geez Naruto, your house smells _awful_." sounded the ever subtle voice of Inuzuka Kiba from the genkan. That celebratory breakfast had long since ended, and Sasuke and Naruto had spent the next few hours tidying the house _quietly_ in preparation of their classmates' arrival. Afteral, Kakashi and Seitaro did need their sleep. It had been a long time since Kiba had been here, the group as a whole not wanting to disturb my writing simply because they were skipping classes, so I wasn't surprised to hear such an exclamation from one with such a sensitive nose as his. The house itself didn't stink, just the surrounding area. An unfortunate side effect of living so close to the Forest of Death, I suppose. There was a reason the village had to extend the fence every few years. All the residual chakra leaking out had to go somewhere and seals could only hold so much.

I could almost hear the amused smirk on Sasuke's face when he spoke, "Sure that's not just you?"

"Oi!" The rest of the boys, except for Shino and Shikamaru, burst into immature giggles.

"Tadaima nee-chan." said Naruto as he stuck his blonde head in the doorway of my office, Sasuke and the others following behind.

"Okaeri Naruto-chan, Sasuke-chan, boys." I smiled. They had only been gone for about an hour, gathering supplies for their project and waiting for the other four to get out of school, but the fact they had made it home safe always brought a smile to my face.

"Hey Misaki-neechan!" waved Kiba from the back and over Shino's shoulder, and Akamaru let out a low ' _boof_ ' as his own greeting. Choji was, of course, speedily making his way through a pack of chips, cheddar by the look, while Shikamaru looked about ready to fall over, but that was normal. He had looked like that from the day he was born.

Shino spoke, "I notice Seitaro-san has returned from his long term mission. Why? Because my kikkai sense his chakra signature down the hall."

Naruto grinned, but whispered... for you know, him. "Yeah, he and Kaka-jii came back last night. They're sleeping though, so we gotta be quiet." He shushed the group loudly and they nodded in understanding.

A low huff of amusement came from the floor beside my desk, where Pakkun and Bull had been resting. I took the opportunity to remove my socks, as they had been slowly drenched in Bull's slobber. "You lot couldn't be quiet if your very lives depended on it." said Pakkun in a sarcastic tone of voice. "Naruto may be able to walk silently, but it doesn't matter if he can't learn to shut up. You're all about to graduate, become shinobi. Even you, Inuzuka, can't managed to hide your scent yet. I wouldn't be surprised if you lot don't even survive your first c-ranks." My blood ran cold, and I had to stop myself from crying out, taking deep breaths. Pakkun didn't know, couldn't know, the true extent of just how utterly _jinxing_ his statement was. I knocked on the polished wood of my writing desk, just in case.

Shikamaru sighed and put his hands behind his head. "Troublesome." The Nara then shuffled down the hall and into the dining area, Shino and Choji following him. Naruto and Kiba scowled, while Sasuke rolled his eyes.

"Yeah, yeah Pakkun. Whatever. Loser, Dog-breath, let's go. I actually want to get a decent grade this time."

"Oi, who you callin' Loser/Dog-breath!" they both shouted, rather insulted, and chased the Uchiha down the hall. They shushed each other, but continued running after the black haired boy.

I looked down at the pug by my feet and frowned. "That was a little mean Pakkun-chan." I wasn't really upset though. Naruto and Sasuke were used to it, as was Kiba, though such criticism usually came from his mother. Shibi didn't tend to hold back either.

He snorted and lifted an eye to look up at me, "But tell me it isn't true."

It was my turn to roll my eyes, though I was grinning. "Mmhmm. You're just grumpy because they interrupted your nap." He did the equivalent of shrug and laid his head back down.

Several hours later, after dinner had been eaten and Kakashi had left to check in with Gai and sleep in his own bed, found Sei and I curled up together in the sitting room, listening to the radio, while the boys rather rambunctiously 'worked' on their project. The last time I had checked on the lot, Kiba and Naruto had attached pairs of glue sticks to their heads and were running around belting 'Dancing Samurai' at the top of their lungs, Akamaru acting as back-up.

" _DANCING IN THE NIGHT!_

 _I'm out, taking the floor with rhythm and precision,_

 _To the guys, I do APOLOGIZE!~_

 _DANCING ALL THE NIGHT!_

 _This age partied away._

 _We'll overthrow the morning sun so viva SAMURAI!"_

"Whoooo!" howled Akamaru. Okay, so he might have also been howling in protest. They really were _awful_ singers. But despite the volume in the next room, under all the noise, a chillingly familiar sound reached my sensitive hearing. I stiffened, and couldn't help but start shaking. _Oh noooo._

Seitaro frowned. "Misa, you okay?" I shook my head and with a trembling hand, turned off the radio. "Whu-? Hey, they were just about to start..." He trailed off as the sound reached him as well.

 _*thump*_

 _*thump*_

 _*swiiiiisssh*_

The jounin had paled considerably under his olive skin and shot out of his seat, body flickering into the other room. I tried to move, to follow, but found myself frozen in place. Damnit, why did it have to happen tonight?

"Sei-nii, what's wrong?" question Naruto as the brown haired man herded the six eleven year olds into the room, turning off lights or blowing out candles as he went.

"There's been another breach." That was all the explanation Naruto and Sasuke needed to join him in darkening the house, pulling the blackout curtains across all the shoji doors and windows, latching them in place. We were a beacon in the night, out here on the outskirts of the village. Tonight, we wanted to be anything but.

Shikamaru turned to me, even as Akamaru began to whimper and Kiba gagged as the smell truly hit them. "Breach? A breach of what?" From the look in his eyes, the question was more for everyone else's benefit then his own though.

* _scitter*_

 _*scitter*_

 _*creaaakk*_

I closed my eyes and pulled the boys close, while Seitaro pulled two of his whips off their hooks, a determined look overcoming his golden eyes. He was still exhausted, barely recovered at all, yet willing to put up a fight. There was no way he could body-flicker everyone to safety, not while running so low on chakra. Of all the times for Kakashi to go home... Naruto and Sasuke shuddered, huddling closer to me, eyes wide.

In a voice quaking with more fear than I have experienced in my life, _oh kami please not a centipede, oh my god, it's on the roof,_ I whispered, "The Forest of Death." I didn't dare flinch as a horrendously deep growl sounded just outside the front door, as the house trembled and shook with the weight of the giant bug on the roof.

"Shino," murmured Seitaro, "send some of your kikkai to your father, tell him what's going on." His mouth barely moved as he spoke. Wordlessly, the Aburame heir nodded and the faint buzzing of a small cloud of insects filled the room. It dispersed, leaving through the cracks in the walls and other such places. "Now, everyone, it's important that you don't mo-"

" _SCREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!"_

 _*BOOM*_

He was cut off as the giant centipede seemingly fell off the roof, causing the ground to shudder on impact. Within seconds, the tiger roared and the bug screeched once more, and the battle over prey began. The prey being us, of course. A sudden white light crackled in the corner of my eye and the air smelled of ozone. As one, the boys and I turned to look in Seitaro's direction, mouths agape. _That idiot._

An ethereal glow filled the room as Seitaro began to run through a series of hand signs, far too quick and practiced for me to discern. My very hair was beginning to stand on end. He pulled the two twenty foot bullwhips from off his utility belt and began channeling chakra into them, their metal tips glowing red, shooting sparks as lightning arced through the leather, conducted by the silver-aluminum core of ninja-wire in the whips themselves. A very creative way of using his lightning affinity to the best of his abilities, while also keeping his enemies on their toes.

With an echoing, to-the-bone roar, the tiger slammed the centipede through into the house, its head getting stuck in the doorway. We scrambled out of Sei's way, away from what was sure to be an interesting skirmish. His weapons having finished 'charging,' the grin forming on Seitaro's face was most definitely not _sane_ , even as the whips flared out in a graceful arc and the hand seals were finished. "Lightning Release: Lightning Burn!" One wrapped itself around the giant bug attempting to make its way into my house, effectively cooking the creature from end to end. Charred centipede is not a pleasant smell, by the way. The other was used to attract the tiger with the bright lightning gathering at its tip, leaving a trail as he spun the long leather. "HERE KITTY KITTY!~" yelled the ex-Anbu cheerfully, leading the enormous feline away from us. It snarled and chased after him.

Away from the house, and us, was when Sei really began to play. He gathered up and began spinning both weapons above his head and to the side, all the while dodging murderous swipes from the chakra-mutated creature. More hand seals, for a longer amount of time, and just the littlest bit slower, showing not nearly as much use for this jutsu. He was interrupted as the tiger's paw finally managed to connect, sending the jounin flying into a tree, blood gushing from his side where a claw had 'nicked' him. Pressing a hand to the wound in attempt to stem the flow, Seitaro slowly sat up, gasping for breath. He didn't know any healing techniques, and was paling fast.

I felt a breeze beside me and managed to look away from the horror of the battle, of seeing someone I loved in such a situation, to see Sasuke had disappeared. Beside me, looking just as confused and horrified as I was, Naruto shrugged. But the uchiha reappeared soon enough, holding a large bottle of... _blood replenishing pills_. "Shinobi First Aid Rule #7: If you're in the middle of battle and get severely injured, with no medic available and no time to bandage the wound, stuff yourself full of blood replenishers until there is." explained Sasuke.

I couldn't help but crack a smile at the matter-of-fact way he said it. "And rule #1?"

The boy rolled his eyes and handed the bottle to Naruto. He had better distance. "Don't get hurt in the first place. Duh."

Naruto scrambled up and jumped onto the back of the very dead bug in my living room. "HEY! SEITARO! HEEREEE!" shouted the boy, throwing the bottle in a style reminiscent of american football. Sei even caught it like it was, launching himself up into the air to intercept it before rolling as he hit the ground running, popping three or four in his mouth. The color returned to his face and he began doing hand seals again, grin widening even more.

"OI STRIPES!" he shouted, catching the tiger's attention once more. "FUCK OFF! LIGHTNING RELEASE: DRUMS OF WAR!" With whips swirling so fast overhead they left an almost full circle trail of light, one arced far to right, the other straight on to the tiger's head. Neither connected, but that was okay. They weren't supposed to. The thing you absolutely must be aware of when it comes to whips, is that they break the sound barrier. As you crack one, the tip reaches high enough speeds that it creates a vacuum and the 'crack' is the sound of air rushing to fill in that vacuum, thus creating a miniature sonic boom. The theory behind the Drums of War technique, which Sei invented, is that you take chakra and enhance that boom, while also electrocuting your opponent. At the very least, you'll deafen them and throw off their balance, similar to Dosu's melody arm, as it does work best in close quarters, amusingly enough, seeing as the only known way to get the effect is by using whips, which are long-range. _But,_ if you get the timing right, you can also do some devastating damage. Or at least, that was how Seitaro had explained it to me.

As mentioned before, the whips did not connect. It was only because I had the brilliant idea to stop enhancing my hearing that I didn't go deaf, though it was a close thing. The force behind the sonic boom sent us all pretty much flying, or in Choji's case, _rolling._ I probably would have laughed if I wasn't worried sick for Sei. The tiger roared in pain as the blasts hit it, though he didn't go down. Seitaro smiled widely, happy he'd get to use his technique more than once. It had come in handy in the war, cutting down whole platoons of enemy shinobi in one fell swoop. Companies in two or three, depending on the size, even a battalion in six cracks. Whips weren't the most popular of weapons, weren't even really all that lethal, but Sei had made them that way with sharpened, sometimes poisoned tips and his skill at handling long whips. Most only averaged about four or five feet, ten if you went with a long one, but Sei had his custom made at fifteen, twenty, even twenty five feet, though that one was only used in a war situation. He was _Konoha no Shiroi Hoippu_. Konoha's White Whip, named so for his preferences for the white leather that wrapped his signature weapons, and it was said that during the Third War, it looked more as if he held a whip of pure lightning, so thick was the electricity surging through it.

 _*BOOM*_

 _*BOOM*_

 _*BOOM*_

Went the whips, slamming their power into the enormous feline who had dared to attack us. Seitaro wasn't smiling now. He had finally registered us, the state of the house, the scrapes and tears in our clothes. The shivers of fear wracking our bodies. No. Now, Seitaro was _angry._ Like a vengeful god, his weapons ripping, tearing into the tiger, leaving lacerations and slashes to match the one in his own side. With one final surge, the very dregs of his chakra, Seitaro loosed one last Drum of War. Finally, the beast fell, dead before it hit the ground. The jounin was breath heavily, lungs working overtime to balance out the lack of oxygen carrying liquid, which was slowly staining his clothes a deep brown as he began the trek over to us. We rushed to meet him, I just managing to catch him as he finally lost the energy to even stand.

"Seitaro!" I shouted, desperate for some kind of reaction. But there wasn't an answer. I was glad Sasuke appeared almost like a ghost on the man's other side, quickly checking his vitals, as it stemmed the threat of tears. _'Kakashi, if I have to watch another precious person's name carved into that damned stone, I might just go mad...'_ The words bounced around my head, like some horribly scratched record that had gotten stuck on repeat. Not now, _please not now_.

He jerked his head at Naruto and was instantly tossed the medic kit. "He's alive Misaki. Going into shock, but alive." This was said as chakra pills and another blood replenisher was forced down Seitaro's throat. Sasuke frowned once he got a good look at the gash carved into the man's side. "This is beyond what I can do though, it needs an actual medic. But... I can try to stop the bleeding and clean it." I began to tune him out, as now he was simply talking to himself, going over his lessons. I could barely take my eyes off of Seitaro. He was so pale and there was so much blood...

There was a surge of chakra behind me and more than one boy gasped. "KAA-CHAN!" shouted Kiba as he was instantly pulled in a bear hug by Tsume, Akamaru being picked up by the scruff of his neck by Kuromaru. A medic quickly took over for Sasuke, mystical palm technique well and alive in their hand.

I clutched him to me and Naruto followed soon after. Slowly, the three of us sunk to the ground, boneless. I only sobbed in relief once the head medic on scene announced that Seitaro would make a full recovery, and it really did look worse than it actually was.

"Shikamaru, are you hurt at all?" Shikaku asked, sounding just a bit too mellow to actually be. The more relaxed a Nara acted, the more agitated they were.

Shikamaru sighed and allowed himself to be hugged a little too tightly than usual by his father. "I'm fine tou-san, just a few scratches. I think the house got damaged more than any of us combined." He pulled away for a second and looked up at Shikaku. "Though I do feel like I'm getting sick. Maybe I shouldn't go to school tomorrow." The jounin commander blinked down at his son before he burst into laughter.

"Tou-san, I'm hungry. Seitaro took my chips away."

Chouza may or may not have been clutching his only son's, only child's hand a little harder than he normally would have, and if for once, Chouji decided he wasn't going to get embarrassed about it, no one needed to know. Just this once though, as long as he got barbecue later.

Shino walked calmly up to his father, stepping over one of the giant centipede's legs to stand beside Shibi. The Aburame Patriarch was silent, but turned his head to face his son, full moon reflecting off the charm on his sunglasses. His gaze was searching, though only an aburame or someone close to one would realize that. He didn't even react when Shino clutched the hem of his coat like he had as a small child, hand trembling slightly, grip weak. But when no one was looking, Shibi led his only son's hand into a coat pocket, though he didn't remove his own afterwards.

"Inuzuka Kiba! Why in the seven levels of hell do you have a glue stick on your head?!" snapped Tsume, her voice echoing off the trees and the whole clearing went silent.

Until Naruto started laughing, of course.

* * *

 _My Dear Itachi,_

 _I think I have to agree with you on that. Employing s-class missing nin doesn't seem very smart at all. Maybe all he needs is their strength? You'll obviously be in need of decent teamwork, if you have to adjust to each other's fighting styles. Must be some pretty strong opponents. Oh, is he now? Akasuna no Sasori... Hmm, you know, I think I overheard Rasa and Karura complaining over dinner with Minato and Kushina about him, a few months before Naruto was born. Karura was about ready to pop with their third child in THREE years at that point. Busy busy... Of course, you'd probably know them better as the Yondaime Kazekage and his Lady Fourth. Rasa and Minato enjoyed teasing each other quite a bit, and don't even get me started on when your father entered the picture... ANYWAY, Akasuna no Sasori is pretty much the number one suspect behind the disappearance, which of course translates to murder, of the Sandaime Kazekage. He was apparently Rasa's mentor as a child, he seemed genuinely heartbroken about it... Takigakure, really? That's not far from Konoha... Ha, and he's a miser? He and Naruto should get together sometime, trade secrets. Ick, Iwa. You know that I don't actually hate it, right? I just don't... like it. Either way, I'm sure THAT must have been interesting. There are some crazy motherfuckers in Iwa..._

 _Oi, I only find World Domination funny when I'm the one who comes out on top! But of course, all of our plans have to be thrown out, because someone had to go and join an organization with the same fucking goals as us. Now what are we supposed to do with the zombie ferret army!?_

 _I'm your sister Itachi. It's my job to know things about my little brother I shouldn't. Oh, but Kisame sounds delightful. I'd love to meet him someday. Maybe next time you're in the area, we could have some tea? I'll make the dango. You have to share a room with him? Ha! That must be absolutely delightful for you. You hate sharing. No, I imagine he wouldn't, if he truly looks as shark-like as you describe. Like you have any room to talk anyway, Weasel._

 _Sasuke is... he's okay, I think. Recovering, slowly but surely. He has panic and anxiety attacks sometimes, but those are getting rarer. He'll have a few questions for you though, next you meet. Gradeswise, even better than, well... before... Naruto's doing fine, his grades are still shit though. Except now, he's doing it on purpose. Apparently, they want to be on the same genin team after they graduate. Clever little shits, aren't they? Owl actually did retire, and is now known as Yokoyama Seitaro. He lives with me and the boys._

 _Sorry hun, you're going to have to figure that out on your own. You know Hana better than I do. However, when you finally figure it out, I am indeed willing to pass it on. Good luck~_

 _Love,_

 _Your Loving Older Sister,_

 _Kishimoto Misaki_

 _岸本美咲_

 _P.S. Yeah! I got published! How awesome is that!?_

* * *

 **1) So here it is guys! YAY~**

 **2) I've noticed that the last few chapters have been sincerely lacking in the humor category, and I'm sorry about that. There are IRL forces conspiring to keep me, and the rest of my family, in a rather sour mood. Hopefully, this chapter was a bit better.**

 **3) CAN YOU TELL I'VE NEVER WRITTEN A FIGHT SCENE BEFORE?! This is seriously the first story I've written to have on screen violence. Okay, so thinking back, technically, the scene where Misaki's dad died was a fight scene too... But this one was an actual fight. You have no idea how long I've been looking forward to finally revealing Seitaro's ninja skillz. You gotta admit, it's pretty badass. But if anyone has any tips for me, PLEASE SEND THEM IN. NOT THE HOUNDS, BUT THE TIIIIIPS.**

 **4) So yeah, Sei is indeed a fellow reincarnation, just... because. No, this wasn't just a spur-of-the-moment thing, it's been in planning for awhile. Just decided not to give y'all any hints, cuz Imma bitch sometimes. I believe I got the idea from another SI/OC called... Honorable Daughter, maybe? I know the SI was Hiruzen's daughter, supposedly the one who spat out Konohamaru, and her guard was a reincarnation. Some sort of generational thing... I can't remember, it's been awhile.**

 **5) I'm not sure if the whole 'Sakura by Darkpetal16'esque letters will continue. I figured it might be a fun thing to do. I'll wait a few chapters and decide then.**

 **6) TIME SKIPS, TIME SKIPS GALOOOORE. I realized we were on ten chappies and the main plot had yet to start. Progress needed to be made.**

 **7) Speaking of time skips, yes, I totally just blazed through a romantic subplot and went *PLOP* 'HERE YA GO!~' The thing is, I'm basing a lot of their relationship on the one between my father and his long-time girlfriend. They have been together for about seven years, they don't know when they started dating. Misaki and Seitaro have been friends for** _ **years**_ **, it's almost painful. But it's not as if they moved in together and were *BAM* 'I LOVE YOU. *patrick voice*' They had to get to know each other in a different way, now that there were truly no secrets.**

 **8) Have y'all realized I focus quite a bit on character interaction? Because if you guys did, it's news to me. This story only has a 'plot' because I have to follow the Naruto storyline. As said in the beginning chapter, many rather 'crucial' decisions are either written on the fly or made via 2/3 coin toss. Because 'professionalism!'**

 **9) Wow, this author's no**

 **10) I can't remember what else I wanted to say...**

 **11) OH! The forgotten measurements from last chapter. Right...**

 **12) Misaki is 177.8 cm, or 5'10 to my fellow americans, and 72.9 kg, or 160.7 pounds. She's pretty much about where a woman her height should be, actually.**

 **13) Seitaro is 185 cm and 80 kg. Otherwise known as 6'1 and 167 pounds. So, not neccesarily a big bastard, but he's not small either. He's only two inches shorter than Kisame, and he's probably one of the tallest, if not the tallest, canon character.**

 **14) CANON CHARACTER. I say this because Kishimoto Jinzaburo, Misa's dad, was 6'7. She weren't alying when she called him a big sonuvabitch. HE WAS.**

 **15) A nice even and round number, perfect to end this rather ridiculous AN. PLEASE REMEMBER TO REVIEW. I LOVE FEEDBACK.**

 **HAVE A GOOD FUCKIN' DAY.**


	11. Canon? Mm, maybe

**Disclaimer: I own Naruto about as much as my dad is CEO of the company he works for. As in, not at all.**

* * *

 _Dear Misaki,_

 _Kisame and I have recently decided to tour the Land of Hot Springs and then the Land of Tea while on our travels for the Akatsuki. This decision has nothing to do with the fact that my partner enjoys visiting hot springs or my love of tea houses. At all. You might recall that our most recent member, Hidan, hails from Hot Springs. We are simply curious as to what kind of place creates a person like him. Obviously. On that note, Kakuzu finally has a partner that won't die on him when he inevitably loses his temper. Apparently, as Kisame recently discovered during a training exercise, Hidan is immortal. Supposedly. He did survive Samehada practically ripping him to shreds though, multiple times in fact. An impressive feat, none the less, as not many can say the same. As far as either I or Kisame are aware, no one in living memory can._

 _Sasuke is graduating soon, isn't he? I wish I could be there for the ceremony... Make sure he receives my gift, as does Naruto. Anonymously of course. Has Seitaro figured out what he'll be doing, now that both boys are going to be out of the house? I know you plan to continue your writing. Your 'Hayao' series is actually quite popular among the Akatsuki, and it's not even by my doing, but Konan's. Apparently, she had been browsing while on a mission in Wind Country and decided to give 'The Castle of Kariosutoro'* a try to alleviate her boredom. In her own words, your first book was a 'breath of fresh air compared to the usual fiction.' Of course, I had no choice but to borrow it, then Kisame, Sasori, and Kakuzu read it as well. Before you ask, yes, we were running low on assignments. A few of us have bets that Leader-sama enjoys your books as well, but we've never been able to confirm it._

 _In other news, Kisame finally realized that I am still in contact with you, though I have not informed him of your exact connection with me or even your name. It's only been four years, it really shouldn't have taken this long, seeing as I wasn't even attempting to hide it. I have assured him that I have not been spying, but he does wish exchange letters with you himself, 'just in case.' Personally, I believe he is just being a particularly curious and bored shark. He can smell when someone is lying, even when they are particularly good at it, such as myself... Not that it ever stopped you from telling either. I hope that is alright? His first will be a PostScript at the end of my own letter._

 _How... How is Hana? Has she moved on at all?_

 _Your (Favorite) Foolish Little Brother,_

 _Itachi_

 _P.S. Oi,_

 _Who the hell are you and why does Itachi-san keep sending you letters? He says you're not a threat, and he's not lying, but people have managed to sneak past me before. I respect Itachi-san far too much to not think him capable of it._

 _Hoshigaki Kisame_

* * *

 _You know,_ mused Naruto as he tapped his chin with the butt of his paintbrush, _the Nidaime looks really cool with a mustache... Wrong color for him though, black might have been a better choice instead of green._ He was interrupted in his thoughts by an irate shout below him.

"NARUTO! WHAT THE HELL DO YOU THINK YOU'RE DOING?!"

The blonde swiveled to look down at the crowd of angry chunin, a familiar face at the very front. He smiled brightly."HEY IRUKA-SENSEI!" responded Naruto. He looked from the now defaced hokage monument and Iruka, blinking in faux confusion. "Is that a trick question? You know I'm not good at those!"

The teacher's face was turning an interesting shade of puce. He'd have to remember that shade... "NARUTO! GET DOWN THIS INSTANT! WHAT WOULD YOUR SISTER THINK IF SHE SAW YOU UP THERE?!" yelled another chunin, causing both Naruto and Iruka to snort in amusement, though the latter did it grudgingly. Over the years, the educator and writer pair often went out for drinks or other such things, and considered the other a good friend, even if Iruka more often than not wandered over to Kakashi's shoulder when neither of them were particularly sober.

Naruto shrugged. With Misaki-nee, it really was a toss up and depended on the prank. This? She'd find hilarious, and Naruto said as much. The group of shinobi was growing angrier and shaking their fists at the blonde, much to his delight. He palmed his pocket knife and flicked open the sharp blade. As he was still an academy student, it was all he was really allowed to carry. Like that stopped Sasuke. "CATCH ME IF YOU CAN, LOSERS!~" shouted Naruto as the rope holding him to the mountain face was sliced clean through, eliciting screams of horror from the crowd and sending him tumbling to the ground. Not that he actually hit it.

There were a lot of things Uzumaki Naruto couldn't do that most other people took for granted. The basic clone and transformation techniques, for example, or sticking a leaf to his forehead with only his chakra. He wasn't fast, nor was he very patient, but he was the best in his year when it came to mathematics or stealth. He was flexible, with good reflexes and instinct, and his classmates knew better than to challenge him at seals or trap-laying. So while Naruto couldn't _quite_ do the tree-walking technique, he had recently managed to actually stick a bit to a tree, enough that he could run down the side instead of falling flat on his face when he eventually lost traction. Seitaro wasn't supposed to have taught him, along with Sasuke, how, but the pair really did have abysmal chakra control.

So when Naruto proceeded to detach himself from the mountain, he knew exactly what he was doing. Instead of immediately going into freefall, he channeled just enough chakra to the soles of his feet and began running down the cliff face. The container almost tripped several times, but he finally reached the height he needed. With one final burst of chakra, Naruto launched himself off and into a tree, swinging from branch to branch until he touched ground with barely a stir of leaves to mark his movement. All the while, everyone else was scrambling to find him, hoping to Kami that the blonde wasn't hurt. None of them wanted to be the one to anger Kishimoto Misaki or anyone else in her strange family.

Naruto snickered to himself as he practically skipped down the street. Seriously, he had been painting the monument for _at least_ two hours and they had only just caught him? And he hadn't even been trying to hide! Though, maybe he should now... Naruto paused mid-step to listen, closing his eyes to better concentrate. Footsteps, flat shoes, shinobi sandals, a whole crowd of people running just a few blocks away. He could hear the very creak of the stiff fabric their flak-jackets were made of. Sky blue eyes snapped open and he pulled his most successful Fuuinjutsu invention yet out from his messenger bag. Someone was coming down his street, which meant it was time to disappear.

"NARUTO, YOU BRAT! WAIT UNTIL I GET MY HANDS ON YOU!" shouted one chunin as he went by. Then another. And another. The Uzumaki couldn't help but grin as they ran right past his hiding place. Suckers. He folded up the Cloth™ (a better name was in development) and stuffed it back into his school bag. The fabric was truly a thing of beauty, inscribed with characters of his own creation, inspired by the strange language his sister sometimes wrote in, and painted with a blood-ink combination that he also made himself. He wasn't the best at the seal arts, having never had an instructor, but Naruto was _very_ advanced for his age group, especially since he wasn't even out of the academy. His father's texts and journals, all names unfortunately marked out, had helped immensely. Symbols for _hidden_ , _camouflage_ , and _attach_ spiraled both anti and clockwise all across the thin sheet in a mesmerizing pattern, activated by his chakra alone. With nothing more than the smallest of chakra, it would blend into it's surroundings, and even 'suction' itself to the surface of whatever it was trying match with, leaving Naruto with both hands free. It had taken him almost a year to perfect it to the point of use, and it was still a work in progress, but there was no doubt it was an impressive piece of work.

 _Now if only I could figure out a way to keep Iruka-sensei from finding me..._ thought the boy as said teacher appeared behind him and yanked him up in the air by his collar. Naruto was really starting to side with his sister on her whole 'Iruka is secretly Espi Squad' theory. The man was just too damn good to be normal, _especially_ for a chuunin instructor. "Damn it Naruto! What do you think you're doing, skipping class and defacing the monument?! The graduation exam is tomorrow, for kage's sake! Instead of pranking, you should be studying!" began Iruka in exasperation as he dragged the future Hokage back to the academy. He went on and on up until they were back in the classroom. "And you'd been doing so well lately too! You've failed the exam twice now Naruto, this'll be your last chance before you're either made to drop out or get sent to the Genin Corp." _And then what will become of your dreams Naruto?_ thought Iruka sadly, though he didn't let it affect his expression. The only way to get promoted to chunin in the Genin Corp. was by field promotion, and that almost never happened.

"Come on Iruka-sensei! I already know everything I need to graduate!" And it was true too. While he couldn't do the clone or transform, unless his sexy jutsu counted, Naruto had long since gotten the replacement jutsu to a reflex, and he would ace the written exam and do well on their taijutsu test.

Iruka scowled down at the blonde. "Oh really now? Well, how about you prove it?" He turned to the rest of the class and activated his 'big-head jutsu.' "ALRIGHT! POP QUIZ, EVERYONE LINE UP!" Frustrated groans echoed across the room, but the students shuffled to the front. All except one. "Sakura!" called the teacher, startling the girl who had been nose-deep in a medical text and causing the other kunoichi in the class to twitter behind their hands. Green eyes wide, the pinkette looked up and around, long hair flaring around her like a veil.

Her cheeks only just turning pink, she gasped out an apology. "I'm sorry sensei! I wasn't paying attention, since we were supposed to be taking a break!" Quickly, Sakura marked her page and scrambled down to the rest of her classmates. Iruka said nothing, but sighed as she fell into place between Kiba and Chouji.

Ami, otherwise known as "Little Purple Haired Bitch" in Naruto's family, scoffed before muttering to a sneering Fuki and Kasumi. "Obviously." The trio burst into cruel cackles and the aspiring medic blushed even harder. Despite this, Sakura held her head high and refused to even glance in the girls' direction. Beside Naruto, Sasuke loosed a glare in Ami's direction, causing her to squeak, pale, then blush, whispering excitedly to her friends. The uchiha sighed and his blonde friend patted him on the back in comfort. Their sister had ground an anti-bullying sentiment into their heads from a young age, and Sasuke was greatly regretting not telling the girls he hated bullies a few years ago. "Alright, now let's see if you guys have the Basic Three down..." Que even more groans and heated glares being directed at Naruto, who grinned despite Kiba, Shikamaru, and Sasuke slugging him repeatedly in the shoulder none too gently. At least he wouldn't suffer alone.

* * *

 **Normal POV**

"No."

"No? What do you mean 'No?'" questioned Danzo fiercely.

I shrugged, though it was not in my normally casual way. I would not let my temper get the best of me, not this time. "No. I refuse." I could see the barest twinkle of amusement spark up in Old Man Sarutobi's eyes. The old fart was enjoying this.

Now it was Koharu's turn to grow angry, though she hid it well. "Kishimoto-san, they will both be graduating from the academy in just a few days, they will be adults in the eyes of the village. Surely you realize you'll no longer have to care for Uchiha-kun... or Uzumaki-kun?"

I smiled back at her. "And do _you_ realize, Koharu-sama, that I don't give a damn?" Straightening my back, I looked all three Elders in the face. I would not lose this fight. "I promised their parents I would care for their children, until they reached old age if I had to. I will not go back on my word. Which means, no, I will not give up custody."

Homura slammed his palm down on the meeting table and jerked his head to face Sarutobi. We were in a debriefing room off the side of the Missions Desk, where more sensitive or gone-wrong missions were reported. Or in this case, custody battles. "Hokage-sama! You can't seriously be considering just letting the Uchiha Scion continue to be raised by this-this child!" He gestured towards me violently, fingertips almost grazing my nose, and I had to restrain myself from biting them. I settled for scowling instead. If I had learned anything from being an unofficial member of the Uchiha clan, it was how to scowl like the masters.

Danzo shuffled in his seat and Sarutobi raised an eyebrow. "Hokage-sama, it was one thing to humor Kishimoto-san with the Uzumaki boy so soon after the fox attacked, and another to allow her both custody of Uchiha Sasuke and to _coddle_ them." Eyebrow Two has entered the game.

I scoffed and took a sip of tea, trying to keep myself calm. Already, I could hear the low rumble of magma churning under my skin, just searching for the smallest crack in my armor that would allow it to erupt. "I'm sorry, I thought Konoha liked having relatively sane citizens. Next time, I'll let the eight year old go slowly insane from grief and guilt."

"They are shinobi. Protectors of Konoha, pieces on a shogi board, small parts of the whole. They are _weapons,_ and weapons do not need to be _sane_." said Danzo, his 'lone' eye following my every move.

I did not storm out of my chair, ready to release hellfire down upon him, though I wanted to. I did not stand, and I did not rise to his bait. My voice was frigid and cutting, little less than a whisper. The old bastard heard me just the same. "They do if you don't want them ending up like Itachi." It almost physically hurt me to say, especially since at least two other people in this room knew the truth behind the massacre, one of them being the manipulative son of a bitch who ordered it done in the first place. Koharu and Homura, I wasn't sure about, but I thought it likely anyway. "Sasuke was barely even an academy student, and certainly not a shinobi. As his guardian, it was my duty to do my best to keep him from falling down the same path as his brother."

Homura scowled. "And yet, out of anyone in this room, you were the closest to him." I felt an eye begin to twitch as he turned back to the Old Man. What the _fuck_ did that even mean?! "Hiruzen, surely you agree? I truly believe it not wise to allow her custody over the pair of them any longer. Kishimoto-san is obviously not caring for them as she should!"

"How dare you! My entire life for the last twelve years has been focused on raising Naruto, and then Sasuke as best I could!" I gasped angrily. Motherfucker... you just entered the battle and I wasn't gonna let you go.

Finally, the kage spoke, "That is quite the serious accusation Homura-san. Tell me, what led you to such a conclusion?" His voice was carefully neutral and the epic poker face he had was up.

"It is widely known that you were in severe pain for months before our late Lord Yondaime ordered your arm numbed. When questioned, Yamanaka Inoichi stated that prolonged suffering sometimes causes a decline in mental faculties. Who's to say the same didn't happen to you?"

I narrowed my eyes at the spectacled man. "I get psyche evaled every two years, as is required of every civilian. I'm as mentally capable as any other person. Ask Ibiki himself, he's the one who usually does it." Yeah, because _that's_ reassuring.

"Uchiha Sasuke is far too thin for his age, and Uzumaki is less than average height, suggesting a lack of proper nutrition in the home."

"It's well documented that all Uchiha males remain lanky and otherwise thin until puberty, Sasuke is well within the average." I responded, rolling my eyes. "And both of Naruto's parents were short as children, he just hasn't hit his next growth spurt yet. Besides, have you seen my garden?"

Sarutobi coughed. "It's actually rather impressive." I grinned at him. Well well well, look who's getting a basket of veggies on his doorstep later...

Koharu frowned. "And the vast difference in grades? Lack of obvious disciplinary action following one of Uzumaki-kun's many pranks?" With almost impeccable timing, angry shouting started outside the building. "Allowance of skipping classes? Surely pointing to bias and favoritism."

"I offer my help with homework on a daily basis, they never take it. Otherwise, you'd have to ask them about their grades. Koharu-sama, Danzo-sama, Homura-sama, you really must be getting old if you still haven't realized that they're traps, not pranks. My little brother has his sights set on the Espi squad, then Hokage. He's an _artist_ , a magnificently talented one." I shrugged and leant back into my chair. "I really don't have an excuse or reason for letting either of them skip except... I don't care? In the long run, it doesn't matter."

Sighing, Hiruzen waved at his old teammates to shut up. "Right, I believe that's enough doubting Kishimoto-san's caretaking skills. I meet with both Naruto and Sasuke privately once a month, neither of them have ever had anything negative to say about her, unless you count regular pre-teen whining about chores or lack of a better allowance as valid complaints?" The gleam in his brown eyes clearly said 'you better not or you're stupider than I thought, which is rather impressive.'

I really do like the Sandaime.

* * *

The next day saw me waiting patiently on a bench as the Academy let out and eager parents and children alike clashed, most whooping about how proud of their child they were for graduating. Over the din, the exceedingly loud guffaw of Haruno 'Last Laugh' Kizashi could be heard as he spun his only daughter around, more excited than even she was. It was to be assumed she was excited, even if Sakura hadn't managed to tear her nose out of her book yet. I smiled a little at the sight. Sakura was different than she was in Canon, probably because of the domino effect. She read more and was already interested in medical jutsu, and though she still had a crush on Sasuke, it was less... eager, I suppose. From afar would be the best term I guess, just not as far as Hinata with Naruto. He certainly didn't mind _her_ crushing on him, if the slight redness of the uchiha's pale cheeks was anything to go by whenever I brought it up. Teenagers are so fun to tease.

There was a minor displacement of air beside me and my smile widened even more. ' _Speak of the devil and an Uchiha shall appear_ ' indeed, Tobirama. I ruffled Sasuke's hair, an action at which the boy huffed. "Hey. How'd you do?"

He shrugged, black bangs falling into his eyes. "Fine, perfect scores across the board. Do you want the protector they gave me, since I'm using tou-san's?" He held it up in offer.

"No thanks," I said, leading the boy's hand back down. "Keep it Sasuke-chan. It marks an important event in your life. Have something to remember it by..." _I have plenty..._ went unsaid, of course. Sasuke and I both visited the local shrine and lit incense for his parents on a weekly basis. I usually brought their forehead protectors, along with Minato and Kushina's, though he didn't know who they belonged to specifically. He and Naruto had long since guessed whose they were, nameless as Naruto's parents were to the pair.

"Hn..." He stuffed it to the bottom of his bag and it was quiet for several minutes. Naruto still hadn't come out yet. The likelihood of him not passing was low, and of course I wanted him to pass, but I still worried...

"Sasuke-chan?"

Ebony eyes flicked to me. "Hmm?"

I glanced back. "Where's Naruto?" Sasuke sighed and deflated slightly. I let loose a breath of my own and patted him on the back before standing up, the uchiha quickly following. Together, we made our way back home, my arm draped across his shoulder.

"He didn't pass... did he?"

Sasuke shook his head. "He did okay on the written portions and most of the practicals, but according to Mizuki and Iruka-sensei, it's a requirement to have the Basic Three down..." He didn't need to tell me just how surprised the teachers were once they had graded Naruto's tests. Over the last month or so, Naruto had 'studied' constantly for the exam during school hours, even though he knew everything required already. While he actually had been revising, though not nearly as intensely as it seemed, it was mostly to prevent accusations of cheating off a neighbor or just in general. It wouldn't be the first time it happened. Such things were a regular occurrence when you sat next to the rookie of the year and were the village pariah... Prejudiced bastards.

I scowled and kicked an innocent rock in my path, sending it skittering down the dirt road. "Bullshit! I know for a fact there was a boy last year who got by without jutsu at all because he can't mold chakra! By the skin of his teeth, yeah, but he still managed to pass!" I punted the rock again, growling and grinding my teeth. "Where's he now?"

Sasuke shrugged. "I don't know. He only stopped long enough to tell me he failed before hightailing it out of there. That was before lunch and I haven't seen him since." The uchiha was concerned for his best friend, you could see it in his body language, and rightfully so. Naruto didn't run off and sulk like most other kids his age. If he didn't want to be found, he _wasn't_. End of story. You could be a hunter nin with decades of experience and I would still bet you wouldn't find Naruto unless he let you.

My angry grimace widened and with one last furious kick to the poor chunk of gravel, I sent it sailing over the wooden fence to our right. The angry yowl of a cat sounded shortly after, followed by relieved and tired cheering.

"Yatta! What amazing luck Gai-sensei!"

"Yes, Lee! I completely agree! What are the odds that a rock would fall from the sky and effectively knock out our quarry! Whoever threw it must be quite youthful indeed!"

Beside me, Sasuke blinked in very obvious confusion, both at the strange speech patterns of Gai and Lee, and the sudden ecstatic look on my face. Gasping in delight, because I was in a bad mood and nothing got me out of one quicker than running into Gai, I jogged over to the fence, hopped onto the oh-so convenient crate, and looked over it.

My cheeks were hurting. "Gai-san! Is that really you?~" Yup, it was indeed him, spandex and all. He was mid-pose and standing next to a boy who was very obviously Rock Lee. Behind the exuberant pair stood poor Tenten, who held what looked like an unconscious Tora, oops, and Neji, both of whom were looking rather unimpressed by their teammate and Sensei.

The jounin's smile was actually quite blinding, but I didn't care. "Misaki-san! Good afternoon!" He moved back out of his awkward stance and made his way over to me, gesturing for his team to follow.

"Haha, I knew it! I'd recognize your voice anywhere. Good afternoon yourself, Gai-san!" Briefly, I waved to his team, who hadn't ever met me. "Hello mysterious genin!" Almost automatically, Tenten and Lee waved back, looking thoroughly confused, though Neji huffed and didn't bother looking at me. See, the brat doesn't remember me... I couldn't wait until Naruto therapy-jutsu'd his ass in a few months. He had been such a sweet child. I had pictures.

Gai laughed. "Ah, Misaki-san, let me introduce you to my youthful genin team! This is Rock Lee, a genius of hard work and aspiring taijutsu master like myself." Lee quickly came to attention and saluted me with a quick 'ma'am!' I saluted back. Thank you JROTC. "Tenten, a weapons mistress, and unsurpassed by her peers in all weapons, bladed or otherwise." The girl seemed to almost glow at her sensei's words and bowed in greeting. "And Hyuuga Neji, a prodigy in his clan's Gentle Fist techniques."

"Hn..." Gai frowned at the aforementioned prodigy, and Lee grew incensed, but I only rolled my eyes. I knew both his father and Uncle, I was used to it. Once he wasn't a little asshole, I'd Gibbs'* him across the head, but it was more likely he'd just Juken my ass if I tried now.

"It's nice to meet you all. My name is Kishimoto Misaki, I'm a friend of your sensei's." I looked down and jerked my chin at Sasuke, who sighed but got on to the crate with me. He could barely peek over, even with the boost, and had to cling to the top. It was a little painful, trying to hold in my giggles at the sight. "And this is Sasuke-chan."

The boy glared at me, a light blush gracing his cheeks. "Don't call me that in public. Uchiha Sasuke." Lee perked up at the name, as did Neji. Tenten, however, had already turned bright red. Hormones, how I didn't miss thee. That had been an interesting part of my life in this world.

"As in _the_ Uchiha Sasuke, last of the Uchiha clan!?" shouted Lee excitedly. At Sasuke's now wary nod, the boy whooped. "Then I challenge you, Uchiha Sasuke, to a spar!"

 _Oh hell no._ Immediately, I shoved Sasuke off the box and out of sight. It's not as if I don't like Lee, in fact I adore him, but the truth of the matter is that I do not desire a broken Sasuke on my hand, especially since he had literally just graduated and Itachi was due to visit in a few months while on his way to the Land of Tea. An injured Sasuke does not a happy Itachi make. An unhappy Itachi means _pain_. Like his sensei, Lee was prone to overdoing it a bit and again, I dislike my little brothers being broken. I know, I know, ' _Misaki, you live in the world of Naruto! And raised two main characters! Pain is the game!_ ' Yeah, well... fuck you.

The three thirteen year olds blinked at the sound of Sasuke's angry grumbling, but Gai looked quite amused. He probably knew exactly what I was thinking. I smiled apologetically at them. "Sorry Lee-kun, I'm afraid I can't allow that. At least, not yet."

Poor kid, he looked so heartbroken. "B-But... why?"

"Yes, Misaki. Why?" asked Sasuke as he climbed back up. I could almost hear him considering pushing me off himself in revenge. "I'm officially allowed to now, after all." The smirk on his face was downright evil.

Gai grinned. "Congratulations Sasuke-kun, graduating from the academy is always an exciting time!" Sasuke nodded his thanks and Konoha's Green Beast turned to face his students and protégé. "But I'm afraid Misaki-san is right! While I'm sure he's quite good among his peers,"

"Rookie of the year." I interrupted with a smile and a proud pat on Sasuke's head. He grumbled again and turned away.

"Exactly, but you have all been under my youthful instruction for a year now and are thus far too advanced at the moment. Maybe after he begins training with his own youthful genin team, I will arrange a joint training session instead!" The spandexed man struck his token good-guy pose, causing Lee to begin his own praises of his idol and master.

I barked a laugh. "I guess that could work. Well, I'll see you later Gai-san. You, me, Sei, and Kashi, Wednesday night for drinks?"

"Of course Misaki-san! I shall see you then!"

I waved goodbye. "Okay, just make sure Kakashi is mostly on time please. See ya Gai-san, Gai's cute little genin." I couldn't help but laugh at the suddenly constipated look on Neji's face.

Hours later, when dinner had been eaten and dishes washed, Naruto still hadn't come home. Seitaro and I had been exchanging glances all night. We both knew what was probably happening right now, that Naruto was stealing the Scroll of Sealing. I think Sasuke had long since picked up on it as well, even if he had no idea what was truly going on.

I sighed as the last plate was put back up, and turned to face the uchiha. He was giving me a knowing look. "Okay Sasuke-chan, I think it's time for you to head to bed. You'll want to be up early if you plan to beat your classmates to the Tower tomorrow. Registering is a pain in the ass and takes forever. Best to get it done as soon as possible."

He didn't move. "Where's Naruto?" I sighed again and rubbed my eyes. "Misaki, you and Seitaro both know something and you're not telling me." Damn, how the hell was I gonna get out of this? "You're both worried about _something._ "

"Sasuke, the only reason we haven't is because we're not allowed." I flicked my eyes in Sei's direction. Good save on his part. Originally, Old Man Sarutobi had been planning on telling Naruto about Kurama tonight, since the blonde would need to be careful about it when outside the village, so it wasn't _technically_ a lie. It wasn't the truth, far from it, but even so, we couldn't just tell Sasuke the truth. It was illegal to talk about it with someone not in the know after all, and I'd rather not receive the death penalty anytime soon.

The boy blinked in sudden confusion. "We want to tell you why we're so worried, we honestly do," I was being completely honest, I did want to tell him, "But it's illegal to talk about it without either direct permission from the Hokage himself or someone who already knows." Not to mention, it'd be hard to explain to the hokage that we knew there was a potential traitor teaching up and coming genin.

"It's Naruto's secret to tell anyway... That's the most we _can_ tell you. It has to do with Naruto and something he's supposed to be told tonight." added Sei, smiling slightly. His grin got a little cheeky. "Maybe if you ask nicely enough, Naruto will tell you when he gets home." Sasuke scowled and began to respond, but then the warning siren began to ring, causing me to wince. The black haired boy startled, but Sei only paused mid-step. Together, we listened to the code being relayed in short bursts of noise.

' _Calling all available chuunin and above. Calling all chuunin and above. Emergency. Emergency. Security Breach Level 2. Genin, remain at high alert, do not report. I repeat, Genin, high alert, but do not report. All Civilians are to stay indoors, Blackout Alpha. Civilians, initiate Blackout Alpha._ '

Huh, martial law time. All three of us were suddenly in a flurry of movement, Seitaro only stopping to kiss my head and grab his gear before he was gone. Newly-minted genin he was, Sasuke paled just a bit, but ran upstairs to get his weapons pouch and bow. I was already dimming the lights and sliding the blackout curtains over our newly rebuilt windows, the only good thing from when the centipede crashed into the house. Feeling quite surreal, I took out my emergency evacuation bag from the closet and sat down at the low table, Sasuke settling in beside me. I found myself gazing at the young uchiha next to me in awe... and worry.

In my old world, my first life, I grew up in a small country town, on the edge of a city. No more than ten miles away, there was a nuclear power plant, the concrete towers as constant a backdrop as the sharp peaks of the Appalachian Mountain Range. Distant, but as powerful as anything. Once a month, they'd test the warning sirens to make sure they were in working order, and the noise would echo off the mountains and be heard for miles. As a child, my greatest fear was that I would hear that haunting wail on any day but the first Wednesday of every month. It is a small, hidden terror that everyone living close to a nuclear plant has, kept close and cold in the back of our minds and the darkest corners of our hearts. Twice a year, the schools would have evacuation drills, making sure both kids and parents alike knew where the school busses would drop us off. In Konoha, it's a lot like that, except instead of a potential nuclear fallout, it's _war_.

I don't know why it took until that moment to really sink in. I had seen whole battlefields drenched in blood as I traveled with Tou-san during the third war. I had seen the damage wrought by Kurama after he was forced to attack the village. My very body was testament to it. Yet, it had taken so long, until I saw Sasuke preparing. This world... it _thrived_ on war. Had the show not been enough to cement this simple fact into my brain? Had the last twenty-two years not been enough either? This society, this culture, who made four, five, six year olds into _soldiers_ who had to kill to survive, that barely blinked an eye as whole clans were razed to the ground, sent children to _battle_. And suddenly, there was that familiar fire under my skin and that damn fallout siren in my ears, and nausea creeping itself across my skin. I shivered and hugged my knees, trying to ignore the feeling of ants walking on my arms. I was disgusted, with myself more than anything. Why... Why hadn't I done anything? Hadn't tried to stop it? My entire first life had been dedicated to better the lives of those less fortunate than I, so why hadn't I done the same here?

I didn't really need to think about the answer for too long, I'm ashamed to admit. Sitting in the dark and quiet gives a girl a lot time to think. I was tired, simple as that. I had done so much in only a decade or so, and I was tired. Changed too much, too fast, and had gotten killed for it. An experience I'd really not like a repeat of anytime soon. _' , surely you can see where I'm coming from here, can't you? It would be in your best interests to take a break, maybe even go on vacation...' 'Hmmm, no. It was nice seeing you again, but I really must be going. I have a speech that needs preparing, after all.' 'Yes, I'm sure, and I look forward to hearing it. Have a nice day Ms. Woodward. It's been a pleasure knowing you.'_ You know, I should have taken that as the threat it was, but I've always been rather stubborn, so I probably would have gone ahead with my schedule even if I had.

I wonder if the bastard ever got caught.

* * *

 **Naruto POV**

 _Whatthehellwhatthehellwhatthehell WHAT THE HELL!?_ I thought to myself as I ran as fast as I could through the forest, weaving between trees like a ghost. I had lost my bright orange yukata top long ago in a desperate attempt to blend in better with the dense foliage. This whole day was going horribly wrong. First, I fail the exam again, then Mizuki-sensei tells me if I steal a scroll from the hokage and learn a jutsu from it, I'd graduate. Then it turns out he was lying and now the whole village is looking for me, and Mizuki's a traitor and I think Iruka-sensei's dead because I'm pretty sure you don't tend to live after getting a fuuma shuriken to the spine, and and and and... Why were the trees so blurry all of a sudden?

 _ **Breathe brat.**_

What.

 _ **I said breathe! There's no use having a panic attack!**_

The.

 _ **Are you deaf as well as stupid, kit? Breathe!**_

Fuck.

 _ **Watch you fucking language brat! Also... TREE!**_

"Ah! Crap!" I yelped, failing to dodge the incoming, low hanging branch, and proceeded to get clotheslined. Not that I cared at the moment, as I was understandably distracted by the voice now laughing hysterically in a far corner of my mind. But I did take the time to do as it said and gulp for air like a fish out of water. When the really weird, and very deep, voice had finally stopped having its fit, and my vision was no longer fuzzy, I paused to listen for incoming footsteps. Hearing and smelling nothing but forest, I clutched the Scroll to me even more and slid between the large roots of a Hashirama-Oak that had long since fallen over.

Sliding to the moist ground, I took a few more minutes to get my bearings, the voice having gone mostly silent if you ignored his, I think it's a boy voice, low grumbling. _Okay,_ I thought to myself, _what the hell?_

 _ **Finally. Are you done freaking out brat?**_

I scowled. "I didn't realize I was making you worried."

 _ **Don't speak out loud, there's no need, unless you want to be heard by the bastard chasing you. I can hear your thoughts just fine.**_ Immediately, I conjured up an image of myself flipping someone off. _**Tch, you humans have no manners whatsoever.**_

I made sure to keep even my thoughts as deadpan as possible. _So sorry, thinks the innocent twelve year accused of treason to the voice in his head as he hides in a tree._

 _ **I never quite realized just how much a sarcastic little shit you could be until I actually bothered talking to you.**_ responded the voice, sounding rather amused. _**I assume that's your older sister's doing.**_

 _Seriously, who, or what, the hell are you?_ I was honestly starting to get annoyed. He went silent. Frustrated, I scratched at my blonde hair, because it's not like it could get any messier, and groaned quietly. "That's it, I'm going insane. I have to be..." I whispered.

 _ **Too late.**_ He stated, chuckling, before going silent again. I wanted to scream, but then almost felt a branch snap to my left. Swiveling my head in that direction, I palmed a few kunai with explosive tags wrapped around the handle. It was time consuming, but I actually found it really relaxing to write and design seals. It felt more like meditation, keeping my hands busy and my mind clear and focused. The Cloth™ had been made more out of boredom than anything else.

Mizuki's almost sickeningly sweet voice rang in the treetops. "Naruto~ Where are you? Come out come out, wherever you are so I can kill you!"

Suddenly, I was very glad I had paid attention during the lessons about throwing our voices to distract enemies. It was during club hours, nee-chan insisted on both of us belong to some kind of club, and Iruka-sensei had given the lesson, as he ran the Espionage Club, or jokingly, the Junior Espi Squad. _Deep breaths Naruto, come on._ My eyes swiveled from tree to tree, looking for that perfect spot in my range...

"Got it..." I whispered lowly, more to the voice in my head than anything else. He scoffed.

That damned traitor's voice sounded again. "Naruuuutoooooo!~ Come on, you little demon, I need that scroll!" He was beginning to sound crueler and more insane than ever. I felt my body shiver, but grinned anyway.

My forced laughter echoed, bouncing through the trees, "MAN MIZUKI-SENSEI, YOU REALLY SUCK AT HIDE AND SEEK, YOU KNOW THAT?" The forest stilled and was silent, until frantic running sounded nearby.

 _ **He'll be coming through those bushes to our left.**_

 _I know._ Blue eyes flickering to the rustling underbrush, I scrambled up the closest tree, barely making it to the lowest branch and almost losing the scroll on my back.

Mizuki's eyes were wide and manic, his face turning red. An almost feral growl of rage left his snarling mouth.

The Voice scoffed. _**If anything in this clearing looks like a demon at the moment, it's him.**_ I had to stifle my startled laughter.

It was really starting to grow on me.

"I know you're here Naruuutoo~ Don't you want to know what happened to your parents? Why everyone hates you so much? If you give me the scroll, I'll tell you~"

I stiffened, almost not hearing the muffled swearing in the back of my mind. I had always put on the best face I could when it came to dealing with the hatred of the villagers. They didn't matter, not really. I mean, yeah, I wanted to be hokage, but still. The villagers... They weren't what was important at the moment. Keeping the scroll away from a traitor was. Oh, it was so tempting though. To finally find out the truth. At least, untilI caught a hint of burning leaves as a breeze came blowing through the forest. Burning leaves and the smell of rain in the air. A storm was coming. But it was a comforting smell, reminding me of home.

 _Laughter roaring out of Misaki-nee as she slapped at Seitaro's knee as they both doubled over at something funny on the radio._

 _Sun-warmed soil under my fingernails and worms wriggling away in a bucket at my side, giggling as Sasuke-teme struggled with carrying over a full-to-the-brim watering can from the stream. Not ten seconds later, both of us freezing our asses off from being soaked to the bone._

 _Quivering in fear as Kaka-ji carefully placed an apple on my head and began adjusting Sasuke's aim with his bow._

 _Watching Misaki's very bones solidify into stone as she stepped in front of a drunken mob who had been throwing things at me. That feeling of tears welling as she turned back to face me, and her blue eyes melted back into that abyss of love and home._

 _ **There's a good kit.**_

I had no need of the village's approval. Not now, not ever. I would become hokage, to prove that even a deadlast could. _Not_ to prove anything else, not to finally get acceptance from the village. Konoha needed a renovation, a breath of fresh air. I would give it just that.

"Shut up! I already know how my parents died and I don't care about the villagers anymore! Besides, why the hell would I believe a traitor anyway!?" I shouted back at the white haired man, still throwing my voice. A final image flashed image flashed to the forefront of my mind.

 _Iruka-sensei standing over me, coughing up blood, limbs shaking from the strain. Two final words before he collapsed. "R-Run... Naruto." The sheen of the giant shuriken in his spine the last thing to catch my eye before there was only panic and green in my vision._

My vision went red and I felt my hands move into a seal as I stepped out into the open, startling Mizuki. "And now... I'll make you pay for what you did to Iruka-sensei! Shadow Clone Jutsu!"

* * *

 **Normal POV**

Old Man Sarutobi stippled his fingers and looked at us from across the desk. It was almost one in the morning now, and my little brother sat exhausted next to me. I honestly hadn't expected this. _This_ being a late night briefing of the evening's events. Sarutobi sighed once again, and leant back into his chair.

"Well, first and foremost, I have recently been informed that Umino Iruka-sensei shall make a full recovery." Beside me, Naruto practically deflated with his sigh of relief.

I couldn't help but let out a small sob and a whisper of "Thank kami." Iruka was a good friend of mine, one of my best really, and it had terrified me when I had been informed of his near death. He had no family, so I had volunteered to be his next of kin years ago. Mizuki was as well. Because we all knew how that had turned out.

Sarutobi nodded in agreement. "Thank kami indeed. It was apparently touch and go for some time, but he was awake long enough after the surgery to give me and Morino Ibiki his statement on the incident." Naruto stiffened as the Hokage reached into his desk and pulled out a paper wrapped object. He smiled and handed it over. "Congratulations Naruto. You are now officially genin of Konoha."

The blonde gasped and ripped the paper open. "Holy crap, holy crap, holy crap! SERIOUSLY!?" There it was, metal gleaming in the dim lamp light and fabric an almost blue-black. I couldn't help but smile at the look on his face. My little brother looked so delightfully happy as he tied it around his forehead and jumped around the room. "I can't believe it! I GRADUATED! I'M A GENIN NOW! WHOOHOOO!"

My proud grin fell as I caught a glance at the Hokage's face. That's right... we still had to tell Naruto about the Kyuubi, didn't we? Damn. He looked so happy too... "Naruto, sit down." I muttered, more to myself than anything, but he heard me anyway.

The blonde paused in his celebration and blinked, slowly sliding back into his chair. "Nee-chan, Old Man, is something wrong?" His eyes had grown a little unfocused, but snapped back instantly. I frowned even more. That was new, he'd never done that before.

"Naruto, Mizuki tried to tell you about your parents, did he not?" began the tired looking hokage.

"YEAH, HE DID! I didn't listen to him though! I mean, why would I believe a traitor anyway?"

Sarutobi and I both couldn't help but smile. "Quite right, Naruto. But now that you're officially a genin, there's something you need to know... It's about the Kyuubi and what actually happened that night when it attacked, the night you were born."

Naruto paled slightly, realizing just how serious this conversation was going to be. The hokage nodded to me. I took a deep breath. Okay, Misa, Kathy, whatever, you can do this. You have to be the one to tell your little brother about the demon in his stomach, and hope he doesn't hate you afterwards. "Naruto, can you come here?" He stood and moved in front of me, and I immediately pulled him into the tightest hug I possibly could. I felt my eyes grow hot, and didn't care.

"Nee-chan, what's wrong? Why are you crying like that?"

"Naru-chan, you know I love you, right? And no matter what, you're still my little brother?" Pulling away momentarily, I touched his forehead to mine and stared into his blue, blue eyes. They held confusion, and some trepidation, even as the blonde nodded warily. I managed to gulp back a sob. "Naruto, the fourth hokage... he didn't kill the Kyuubi that night. Bijuu are made of chakra, and you can't kill chakra. You can only move it somewhere else, you know that right?"

The blonde nodded again. "Yeah, I remember Iruka-sensei telling us about that. Even when using jutsu, you don't actually get rid of the chakra you're using, just spreading around, right?" He looked to the hokage for confirmation, and received a nod. Naruto grinned again, before it fell and his eyebrows furrowed. "But... if the Yondaime didn't kill it, what did he do?"

Hand trembling, I took my little brother back into an embrace. "H-He... he sealed it away, sacrificing himself to the Shinigami in the process. The only way he could stop it." I felt another sob rake over me and I held Naruto even tighter. "And he sealed the nine-tails into a newborn baby boy with corn-yellow hair and eyes as blue as the sky, and his dying wish was for that child, that sacrifice, that jinchūriki, to be treated like the hero he was. That baby, Naruto, was you."

He stiffened in my hold and tore himself away, looking absolutely betrayed. I felt my heart shatter at the look in his eyes. "W-What? What do you mean?! The fourth sealed the kyuubi... into me!? Why? Why me!?"

Because you were the only that could contain it without dying and he wouldn't stand to see you completely orphaned if he sealed it into Kushina again. Because you're his son and he wanted you to have something to possibly protect you when he died. Because he loved you, and loved the village. So many reasons. "I don't know Naruto. I don't know." I felt even more tears coming on.

"Is... Is that why the whole village hates me so much? Because of the Kyuubi? Something I can't help?" He sunk into his chair again and gazed down to the floor. "Is this why they've always called me a demon too? Everyone lost someone because of the nine-tails and they hate me for it. Am I? Am I a demon, just like they say?"

Sarutobi opened his mouth to respond, but I beat him to it. I surged out of my seat and knelt in front of my little brother, so I could grasp his face in my hand to make him look at me. "NO! Don't you dare even start thinking shit like that, Uzumaki Naruto! YOU ARE NOT A DEMON! You are a little boy surrounded by nothing more than idiotic people who cannot see past their own damned grief! Yes, everyone lost a loved one the night you were born and yes, you have the kyuubi sealed inside you, but that doesn't mean a damn thing! You are not the kyuubi and it isn't you either! You are its cage, the village's protector, keeping it from destroying us all over again! Just as the yondaime said, you are a _hero_ ,Naruto! Nothing more, nothing less, do I make myself clear?!"

Eyes wide once again, he nodded and I let go of his face to instead engulf him in another hug. He stood stiffly for several moments, before, finally, Naruto wrapped his arms around me, nuzzled into my shoulder, and began to cry. The blonde began mumbling. "Do you hate me, nee-chan, because the kyuubi killed our parents? Do Sei and the others hate me too? Iruka-sensei and Kaka-ji? Does Sasuke even know?" I pulled him even further into my lap.

"Oh, Naruto, my little otouto, I love you so much. Don't you ever doubt that. Everything I have ever done since you were born, has been for you. You are the center of my world, and your very _existence_ saved my life. How... How could I ever hate you? And Sei loves you just as much, because he's been with us almost since day one. He didn't have to stick around when he retired, but he did anyway." I ran my fingers through his short blonde hair. "Iruka lost his parents during the Attack, but he doesn't hate you, nor does Kakashi. They hate the nine-tails, but not you. No one could ever hate you, if they bothered to know you. You are loved Naruto, don't you ever forget that."

Sarutobi coughed and we both looked to him. The old man was wearing a very proud smile. "Naruto, you will have to tell Sasuke yourself, as I made it illegal for anyone to talk about your secret with someone not in the know, unless you are myself or the jinchuriki, which is you. You may tell anyone you wish to." Naruto nodded and wiped at the tear stains on his cheeks. "Now, while I am sure you still have many questions, it is very late..." The clock on the wall chimed two in the morning, "or is it extremely early? Either way, I believe it is time for everyone to get some rest. You may meet with me at any time you wish during this week."

Almost on queue, Naruto yawned nice and wide. Together, we stood, my little brother clutching my hand like he did when he was younger, and bowed.

* * *

 **Naruto POV**

I sat seiza in front of the large cage, staring defiantly up at the glowering red eyes looming over me. All around me was something similar to a sewer, dark and wet, but thankfully without the smell. Me and the fox were locked in a never ending stare-down, waiting for the other to make their move.

After a long wait, finally, the Kyuubi growled out his answer. " **Rook, three spaces, my right.** " I couldn't help but grin triumphantly as I moved his shogi piece for him on the board. We'd been playing all night, here in my mindscape, as my body rested in the real world. As I never actually dreamed, this was a much better alternative. Something something 'strategy training.' Whatever. Personally, I think the big fuzzball was just bored.

Delighted, I shot up and began jumping around the room, "YATTA! CHECKMATE, YOU DAMN FOX!~" As I began to celebrate, the shogi board and table disappeared, as if they were never there. "I BEAT A DEMON AT SHOGI!~ I BEAT A DEMON AT SHOGI!~ BELIEVE IT!" I did a little jig.

He growled again. " **Oh quit your cheering kit. You got lucky, that's all.** "

"So the last three times I won were also only because of luck?" I asked cheerfully.

" **YES! You have the devil's luck, you dimwit! I have lived for centuries, millenia even, and know the secrets of the cosmos and of the world in which you and I both reside. There is no kami-damned way a little brat like you could beat at something as simple as a game of stupid shogi!** "

I stuck my tongue out at the large canine-esque demon. "Oh, you're just a sore loser Kyuubi!"

" **I am not!** "

"Are too!"

" **Am not!** "

"Are too!"

" **Am not!** "

"Are too!"

" **Am no-!... You know what brat? Shoo, ya bother me.** "

I blinked up at him, a victorious grin on my face as the dimly lit walls faded to black, and the fox's irritated grumbling was exchanged with the grating noise of my screaming alarm. "Ugghhhh... shu' up, ya stupid clockkk.." I snaked my hand out and turned it off. Groaning once again, I sat up and stretched, and glanced at the clock with a yawn. Ugh.

With as much grace as can be had by a twelve year old at 6 in the morning, which is very little, I rolled myself out of my futon and onto the floor, simply too sleepy to actually bother standing up yet. Several minutes later, I had finally stopped shivering on the cold hardwood long enough to sit up and blink blearily across the room at Sasuke. The bastard was still fast asleep in his cocoon of blankets, with nothing but the tips of his stupid haircut showing. I stumbled over to the sleeping Uchiha and jabbed him with my foot.

He grumbled at me and shuffled more into his futon. "Go 'way."

"Come on duck-ass, 's time to get up." I said, kicking at the covers again. This was followed by a jaw-cracking yawn of epic proportions. I wiggled my jaw around some more and sighed in relief as a satisfying crack sounded. Ahh, that's better.

"Don' wanna..." responded the sheets.

I rolled my eyes. To think, most people thought I was the difficult one in the morning. "Well, ya gotta, or Sei-nii's gonna come up instead, and neither of us want that." We had long since learned the consequences of either adult having to wake us up. With Misaki, it could be as simple as an early bedtime or helping her weed the garden. Seitaro, however, tended to be more... extreme with his punishments. Even worse was when he managed to convince Kaka-ji to help him. They called it 'training.' Sasuke and I called it torture.

Sasuke finally poked his head out, black eyes full of hatred and loathing. Not for me, but just for having to get up in general. To this day, I stood by my claim that the Uchiha could be lazier than even Shikamaru sometimes, if he put his mind to it. He groaned again, "Ugh... fine." As slowly as a snail, Sasuke sat up and gazed tiredly around the room.

I smiled as he watched me open the window to let in some light and air. "Come on Sasuke, get up! It's team assignment day, we can't be late or we might miss our squad's number."

"Assuming we're put on the same one." responded Sasuke, who had started folding up his futon for the day. I mentally debated if I had the energy to do the same with mine... Nah. Wandering over to my dresser, I pulled out my new outfit, which had been a graduation present from a supposedly anonymous source. My old clothes had been burned after the incident with Mizuki earlier in the week, and Misaki-nee had handed us our graduation presents the day after.

I held out the ensemble for my best friend to judge with all his Uchiha fashion sense. "Don't be stupid teme, of course we'll be on the same genin squad! This has been four years in the making! Believe it! Have a little faith in my genius!" At his nod of approval, I slipped on the dark blue shirt embroidered with the Uzumaki symbol across the back and some dark cargo shorts. As I held up my new hooded vest, I couldn't help but smile at the various shudders it would give many of the veteran shinobi who saw it. While it wasn't my _favorite_ shade of the bright color, the fabric had been dyed a nice, dark burnt orange. It was soft and lightweight, perfect for the warm weather of the Land of Fire, but you could tell it was built to go through a lot of wear and tear. Sturdy. The hoodie came with many pockets, hidden or otherwise, and the drawstring for the hood was inside the collar to prevent strangulation by an enemy. The hood could even be tucked inside a small pocket at the base of my neck. After Mizuki, I really couldn't stand wearing my old yukata tops, so I was glad for the opportunity to wear something else. Besides, as my sister would say, I was starting a new chapter in my life, and thus needed a new outfit... Nee-chan was weird sometimes.

Sasuke still wore his yukata tops though, and had already put Fugaku-ji's old headband on the brand new obi he had received, like my hoodie, 'anonymously.' The new belt was white, but with dark red accents to go with the Uchiha clan colors. It was also made of a ridiculously strong silk secretly lined with about twenty feet of ninja wire Sasuke could use in an emergency, which was cool.

"Yeah, but remember what Iruka-sensei would always tell us during when we'd wage 'war' with another class in our year?" said Sasuke as he finished tying on his belt and reached for his gloves.

I gave him a deadpan look. Out of the two of us, I had paid attention to Iruka-sensei's lectures the most, despite appearances. "A plan never survives contact with the enemy, teme. Come on, don't be sloppy." He threw a random, misplaced sock at my head.

"Whatever... loser." The Uchiha smirked even more when I tossed the sock back and missed. I hadn't really been trying.

The door leading up to our attic-turned-shared room slid open, and though we couldn't see Seitaro-nii stick his head through the doorway, we certainly heard him. "Boys! Are you awake yet? Come on, you have to leave in less than thirty minutes!"

"Hai! We're ready!" We called down together before stampeding down the stairs to eat breakfast.

* * *

As usual, Sasuke went inside the classroom before me. If everything went as planned today, we wouldn't need to keep up the charade any longer. Because we'd _totally_ keep it up even if we were assigned to different squads. Yeah right. But it was a ritual and the thought that we'd never have to do it again sent a thrill running through the both of us. Five minutes later, I adjusted my brand new shinobi headband, displayed proudly across my forehead, and entered the classroom.

There was still some time before class started, so most of the other studen-… genin were milling around and talking to friends. Sasuke sat at the end of one of the middle rows, and some of his fangirls were twittering about him a few aisles over, but otherwise, the Uchiha sat alone. I smiled and wandered over to him, waving cheerfully at Chouji, Shikamaru, and Shino, all of whom greeted me in their own ways. Chouji looked surprised to see me, but not unhappy, seeing as he tossed me one of his chip bags. Shikamaru opened one eye and huffed at me, and I heard a faint buzzing in my ear as I passed Shino.

I had just about reached Sasuke's row when someone called after me. "Hey, Naruto! What are you doing here?"

I turned to face yet another of my childhood friends. "Oi, Inuzuka! What the hell does that mean?"

"Well, didn't you fail the exam again? Shouldn't you, ya know, not be here?" responded Kiba, looking genuinely confused instead of maliciously curious like the rest of the class.

"Are you blind as well as dumb Kiba? Don't you see the shiny headband, just like yours?" I pointed to it and his eyes widened, before a large grin made its way onto his face. "I managed to convince Iruka-sensei to let me have another go." At least, that's what I'm supposed to tell anyone I don't trust. I do trust Kiba, and the other guys, but I couldn't just tell them the truth in a crowded classroom. "It's not that big of a deal..." A chunk of the surrounding genin were staring at me in almost awe, and it was making me really uncomfortable.

Akamaru popped out of the tracker-in-training's own jacket and barked. Kiba shook his head in disbelief. "Dude, only you could get Iruka to let you redo the exam. He's never let anyone else take it again."

Old Man didn't think this story all the way through, did he?

 **No, no he did not, brat.**

Well, look who finally decided to come back once he got over his snit this morning.

 **Shut up and pay attention.**

Yeah whatever, ya sore loser.

"Oi, Naruto!" *snap* *snap* "Naruto! Earth to the orangest knucklehead ever!"

I probably looked silly as I crossed my eyes to focus on Kiba's snapping fingers. Scowling, I smacked the Inuzuka's hand out of my face. I had gotten distracted by the damn fox again. He was like a gnat or tinnitus or something, always buzzing and jabbering in my ear. "Sorry Kiba, got distracted."

The browned haired boy snorted, "Yeah, because _that's_ news." Akamaru barked again, and Kiba looked down at the puppy, before rolling his eyes. "Okay, okay. Speaking of Iruka-sensei, he's coming down the hall." And with those parting words, he dashed into the nearest empty seat. I stared after him for a second, but shrugged and headed down to Sasuke.

"Naruto..."

I paused mid-step and tried to keep my eye from twitching too much. What was it with everyone and stopping me all the damn time today?! I turned to face the speaker, locking eyes with an intelligent gaze. "Yes Shikamaru?" I responded with an extremely put-apon sigh. I swear, if Iruka yelled at me for not being in my seat...

Lazy bastard looked so amused. "Want to go out for barbecue after we're all done meeting with our sensei? Usual suspects?" Our classmates not in the know, the ones who heard anyway, all seemed very confused by this last statement, but it was actually code. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw Akamaru's ears perk up and he woofed lowly to his master, and the faint buzzing of Shino's kikai in my right ear faded away. Kiba's mischievous smirk widened minutely and he barked out a delighted cackle, causing his poor neighbor to scooch away from him. Shino didn't visibly react to the information relayed by his beetle, as far as I could tell anyway, but the Aburame had received the update in our group's plans for the evening. Chouji obviously already knew, sat next to our resident genius Nara as he was, and I could tell Sasuke as soon as I finally made it over to my seat.

Grinning, I did a thumbs up. "Sure thing Shika-"

"Don't you dare."

"-maru, as soon as we're all done! See ya later!" I ignored the lazy boy's amused huff and jogged back down to the teme's row. "Oi bastard, budge over and give a future hokage some ro-….." I felt even Kyuubi's eye twitch in mild frustration. Deep breaths Naruto, deep breaths. Look at it this way, at least it's not Ino, or worse, Ami. Again. "Oh hey... Sakura-chan..."

The pinkette barely glanced away from her book to greet me. "Good morning Naruto. Congratulations on graduating after all. The teachers were never very fair to you, and I'm glad to see that at least Iruka-sensei was on your side." Over the strange kunoichi's head, Sasuke and I shared confused looks. Sakura had never really been social. At first, it was because she was just shy, and not very outspoken before she met Ino. Ino, in that Yamanaka way of hers, started chipping away at Sakura's shell. They were actually really good friends until they got into an argument right in the middle of break one day. They'd been walking on eggshells with each other for days at that point, but even now, no one really knows why or how it happened. It had eventually turned into an outright brawl between the two girls, both of them rolling in the dirt and pulling no punches.

It was in that fight that Sakura really started separating herself from the rest of the girls. Mostly, it was because she didn't fight like them, instead trying to punch and kick like we'd been taught in Taijutsu class. While the pink haired girl didn't have much stamina, damn did she have some force behind those punches. After that, she returned to being that quiet girl, though she wasn't shy anymore. Kiba had jokingly dubbed her the girls' version of Shino, except Sakura certainly didn't tank her grades like he did. But like the Aburame heir, she was silently confident, always watching and always learning. Well, as long she didn't have her nose in a medical text or jutsu scroll. She was our Top Kunoichi, with scores compared only to Sasuke's in everything but taijutsu and genjutsu, though not from a lack of trying.

Sakura wasn't very obvious with her crush on my best friend, especially compared to how the other girls acted, but it was still there. At first, the teme had been really confused, because Sakura _didn't_ act like the rest of his fanclub, not that he wanted her to, yet was still very much crushing on him. To be honest, it kind of freaked me out too. Luckily, Misaki-nee managed to explain that maybe Sakura had seen how he treated his other fangirls and had chosen a different way to attract his attention, instead of just dressing nice and wearing horribly-done make-up. It was obviously not working, so why not _actually_ impress him? The worst comes to worst, she'd have high grades at least.

"Thanks, I guess... You're kinda in my seat, could you move over or something?" I pointed.

The girl tapped her chin with the black pen she'd been writing with, as if thinking. "Hmm... No, but you can sit on this side of me." At my increasingly frustrated groan, Sakura laughed before capping her pen once more and sticking it back into her messy bun. Oh... that was new. For the longest time, the pinkette had only ever worn her hair down, or braided if we were doing taijutsu, but not actually up. It was, like I said, extremely messy, with loose strands of hair falling to frame her face, and it seemed the only reason it hadn't collapsed yet was because of how she wore her own hitai-ate. Like an actual headband. I hadn't seen a lot of other shinobi wear it like that, believe it or not.

Sasuke looked at us from the corner of his eye, playing up the aloof and cool bastard act. Inside, he was laughing hysterically though, I just knew it. I put my hands up into a begging position. "Come on Sakura-chan, pleeaaaaase?! I wanna sit next to the teme!"

"You've sat next to Sasuke-kun everyday for the last four years Naruto, I think you can survive one day."

"Hmph... fine." I agreed grumpily and flopped down into the open space on Sakura's right. Just in time too, seeing as Iruka-sensei shuffled in not a minute or two later. Around the room, the other kids burst into whispers about his appearance. The scarred man was walking gingerly, as if walking on eggshells, to his desk, and his normally tanned skin was pale and sallow, as if he'd been ill. Bandages were just barely peeking out above his collar.

Beside me, Sakura gasped, and seemed genuinely concerned. "Oh no, what happened to sensei?" I shifted a little nervously. Iruka had told me a million times that it wasn't my fault when I had brought him lunch while he was still in the hospital, but I still felt so guilty. If I had just thought for a moment about what Mizuki was telling me, if I had let myself be caught or asked Seitaro about it, if I hadn't been frozen in fear, Iruka wouldn't have gotten hurt. There were a lot of ifs, a lot of 'I wish's and 'I should have done's, but they couldn't change what happened. It was in the past now. I'd make it up to Iruka-sensei one day, I would.

Iruka sighed as he placed his bag on his desk. "Alright guys, settle down..." I couldn't help but grin as the vein in my favorite teacher's head slowly began to pulse when the rest of the class refused to quiet. I glanced down my row to watch Sasuke's and Sakura's reactions. We were the only group who wasn't talking. Sakura-chan was simply looking on serenely, a small smile on her face, and Sasuke had finally opened his eyes, which held an amusement that matched his smirk.

The chuunin's eyebrow twitched as he tried to once again shut us up. "Quiet down!" Iruka rubbed at his eyes, shrugged, and began to do some hand signs. Almost automatically, I elbowed Sakura in warning, who in turn did the same to the teme, and all three of us covered our ears.

"FOR THE LAST FREAKING TIME, SHUUUUT UP!" The Big Head no Jutsu is truly a terrifying thing.

But it's also very effective.

Releasing the jutsu, Iruka grimaced a bit as he fell back into his desk, leaning on it for support. He'd paled even more, which made me think he wasn't supposed to be using any techniques. "Finally." He clapped his hands and straightened after taking a few breaths. "Congratulations, all of you, for making it this far! It truly has been an amazing journey these last couple of years, and I am so proud of all of you!" The chuunin smiled brightly up at all of us, and I straightened my back. It felt nice to have him say that.

"WHOOOHOOO!" echoed in from the back of class.

"Yes Kiba, thank you for that." responded Iruka with a smile and a rolls of his eyes. Reaching into his bag, the teacher pulled out a rather large scroll and began unrolling it. "Now I'm sure I have a lot more to say about how proud I am, but you guys don't really care about that. You just want your team assignments, don't you? Well here you go. Team 1: Horiuchi Ami, Yanagi Hisanobu, and Nakata Kasumi." I laid my head on the desk. We had been a large class of about fifty, and five people, myself not included, had failed this year. Which meant fifteen teams of three. This could take awhile.

"Team 2: Kobayashi Fuki, Sonada Toichi, and Mihara Ioko, Team 3..." I wonder what Misaki-nee and Sei-nii are doing right about now. I hope nothing too gross.

", and Matsubara Kenko. Team 7: Uzumaki Naruto," Hearing my name, I immediately sat up, staring intensely at the teacher. "Haruno Sakura," Beside me, the girl stiffened. "and... Aburame Shino? What?"

I let my forehead hit the table with a bang. Nooooooooo. I mean, I like Shino, he's cool and all, but I was supposed to be on a team with Sasuke! I could practically feel Sasuke slump on the other side of Sakura, though I'm sure most thought it was out of relief.

"Oops, sorry guys. I skipped ahead!" Iruka corrected, and scratched his head in embarrassment. "I haven't gotten much sleep the last few nights, and my eyes tend to wander." I let out a breath and sat up. Okay, there's still a chance, cross your fingers Naruto.

"I'll start over. Team 7: Uzumaki Naruto, Haruno Sakura, and... hm, Uchiha Sasuke. Next is Tea-"

He didn't get to finish his sentence. "YES! FINALLY! IT WORKED, HAHAHA!~" I jumped out of my seat and over Sakura to fistbump Sasuke. "I told you it would work Sasuke! But you didn't believe me!"

The uchiha was actually almost smiling! "I had my doubts, yeah. Four years is long time loser. Especially if it's one of _your_ plans."

"Shut up, it worked didn't it?! THIS THE GREATEST MOMENT OF MY LIIIIFE!"

Sakura looked really confused, but also very annoyed as she pulled me off the table and back into my seat. "Sit down! You're embarrassing me!" I did a jig in my seat and she facepalmed.

"Ahem." Facing Iruka, I couldn't help but grimace at the look on his face. "May I continue now, Naruto?" Everyone else was staring, and I slumped low into my seat.

I scratched the back of my head, and let out a nervous chuckle. "Sorry sensei... I just got excited."

The teacher rolled his eyes, shaking his head. "Yes, I noticed. Now, Team 8: Aburame Shino..."

* * *

I yawned and stretched my arms up high as the bell rang, signaling our lunch break. We'd been forced to sit in the classroom doing nothing for the last three hours! At least after lunch, we'd immediately be picked up by our sensei. I shared a look with Sasuke and he nodded. We stood and took our bento out of our bags, and I turned to Sakura with a smile. "Hey Sakura-can, wanna eat lunch with us?" I made some quotations with my empty hand, "'Team bonding time' or whatever?"

I couldn't help but almost frown at the surprised look on her face. She looked down at her lap where she had already placed her own lunch. Had she really been expecting to eat alone? "Are you sure? I mean, I'm not much for conversation... unless you count listening to me spout useless trivia as conversation..."

Sasuke scoffed and tightened the knot of the kerchief holding his bento together. "No trivia is useless, you never know when you'll need supposedly unimportant information."

"Yeah Sakura-chan, info is info, no matter what. Which means, you don't have an excuse to not eat lunch with us." I agreed with another smile. Sakura blinked and her eyes grew a little glassy. I shared a panicked look with the teme. Oh kami, was she going to cry?!

"Thanks... I'll come eat lunch with you guys," said the pinkette with a sniffle, but thankfully, she didn't let her tears fall. Quickly rewrapping her bento, Sakura stood to follow us to our normal spot under the large tree right outside the front entrance.

"I CALL THE SWING!" I shouted as I ran by my new teammates and slammed into the aging wooden perch at full speed. I only barely managed to keep my grip as the momentum almost turned the swing upside down.

Sasuke sneered at me. "You _always_ get the swing Naruto! Let someone else have a turn!" He unsealed the checkered picnic blanket we'd always eaten lunch on, since before the academy even. Misaki-nee had used it for the picnics she'd sometimes take the kids she used to babysit on, and had given it to me once Sasuke and I had entered school. It was a bit raggedy, and faded from who knows how many washes, but it was still soft and did its job.

"Because it's MY swing! Besides, you don't even like to swing." I stage-whispered to Sakura, an evil grin on my face, "It makes him nauseous." She burst into giggles.

The bastard rolled his eyes and pulled me off. "Yeah, when I was like five!" I plopped down on blanket and opened my bento with a flourish, the other two joining me. Sasuke, as usual, sat to my left and in the shade of the ancient tree, while Sakura was on my right. Before she even sat down, the green-eyed girl paused to straighten out her red tank-top. Under the top, she wore a mesh, long sleeve shirt, and had dark green spandex shorts on, along with a pale gray skirt. Around her waist was a dark green jacket. By the time she'd sat down, Sasuke and I had already proclaimed 'Itadakimasu' and began to chow down.

I rolled my eyes back and gestured wildly with my chopsticks. "Oh really? Then why do you always blow chunks when Sei-nii has us practice our gymnastics?~"

Sasuke snobbishly took a bite of his onigiri, taking the time to think of a response. After swallowing he held up his index finger. "One: Seitaro has nothing to do with this argument, so don't bring either him or his devilish training up. Second: Don't even try to act all cool, because you puke too."

"THREE: I AM EATING AND IF EITHER OF YOU BRING UP BODILY FLUIDS OF ANY SORT WHILE I AM DOING SO OR EVER AGAIN, _I WILL END YOU_." shouted Sakura, making us both stare, wide-eyed, as she proceeded to act as if she hadn't said anything and calmly popped a pickled plum into her mouth. Sasuke and I shared a look.

Note to Self: Do not anger Haruno Sakura if you want to live.

* * *

 _*thunk*_

 _*thunk*_

 _*thunk*_

"Quit it Naruto."

 _*thunk*_

 _*thunk*_

"Seriously? I'm trying to read!"

 _*thunk*_

 _*thunk*_

 _*thunk*_

 _ **I swear kit, you're giving even me a headache. Just stop!**_

 _*thunk*_

 _*thunk*_

*BANG*

"UUUUUGGGGHHHH! I'M SO BOOOOOORED!" I laid dramatically across my desk. Sasuke shoved my feet out of his face and I tumbled to the floor. "….Ow."

Sakura sniffed from her perch on Iruka's desk. He'd left over an hour and a half ago. "Serves you right. I'm trying to concentrate Naruto, this a particularly hard chapter." Her speech was muffled by the pen in her mouth.

I rolled around a bit, before sighing the deepest sigh to ever sigh and stared up at the ceiling. "But Sakura-chan, I'm boooored."

Sasuke leaned over and raised an eyebrow at me. "And? What do you want us to do about it loser?"

"Entertain me."

"No, entertain yourself," said both my teammates with scoffs. They startled and blinked at each other, which made me burst into giggles. Sakura blushed and stuck her nose back into her book, and Sasuke coughed into his hand, proceeding to stare out the window.

My ears perked up as the door to the classroom opened. Quickly rolling to my feet, I turned and pointed at our sensei. "You're la-…..!" I felt my irritation morph into an expression of utter horror.

Behind me, I could hear Sasuke let his head fall to the desk with a loud bang. "Oh kami, strike me down now."

"Now now Sasuke-chan, that was so uncalled for," whined Seitaro, stepping out from behind Kakashi. I might have thought he was genuinely upset if it wasn't for the manic grin on his face. He was _enjoying_ this!

The smile on Kakashi's face, on the other hand, was downright wicked. Never mind his mask, I could tell anyway. "Hm... my first impression of all three of you is that you're very loud... and rude. Meet us on the roof in five." The pair quickly bodyflickered right back out.

"Did you know those two?" asked Sakura as we made our way to the roof. I stuck my hands behind my head and scowled.

"Yeah, almost all my life. The taller one is my sister's boyfriend, he lives with us. His name's Yokoyama Seitaro. Ex-anbu, used to guard us when I was little."

"The one with silver hair is Hatake Kakashi, a friend of Misaki's. He comes over for dinner about once a week," continued the teme as he opened the door leading onto the roof. "He's ex-anbu too." Sakura nodded in understanding, but frowned again.

"Wait, why would you need a guar-" A loud clap interrupted her question and we turned to face the pair of jounin.

"Great, now that we're all here, let's get introductions out of the way first." said Kakashi after we had all sat down. "You know, names, likes, dislikes, hobbies, and dreams. Stuff like that."

Sakura raised her hand, "How about you guys do it first? So we know how."

Kakashi eye-smiled down at her. "Alright, let's see... Ah, my name is Hatake Kakashi and you'll be calling me Kakashi-sensei. My likes and dislikes don't concern you. My hobbies? I have a lot of them, and you're all too young to know them anyway. My dream is a dream." The poor pinkette just blinked, wide-eyed, up at him.

 _ **All he told you was his name...**_

I think that was the point Kyuubi.

 _ **What an annoying man.**_

You have no idea.

Sei rolled his eyes and sighed good naturedly. "Well, fine Kashi, if you're gonna be that way. The name's Yokoyama Seitaro, you can call me Sei-taicho, as I'm not your sensei but an assistant for Kakashi. My likes include, but are not limited to, training, cherry-chocolate ice cream, and owls." Sasuke and I both snickered, and he rolled his eyes again. "My dislikes are mainly earth-jutsu users, stupid people, and the occasional duck."

Even Kakashi did a double-take. "What?"

"What? Ducks can be right assholes, okay?" explained Seitaro. The masked-nin by his side simply shook his head. "Can I continue now?" Kakashi nodded, even though his shoulders were shaking from trying to hold in his laughter. "Thank you. As I was saying, I do dislike the occasional duck. In my spare time, I enjoy going on dates with Misa-chan, drinking with friends, and going on missions every now and again. My dream at the moment is to one day convince Misaki to either marry me or let us get a dog so we don't have to keep dognapping Kakashi's." His golden eyes softened a little at the thought of marrying my sister... or getting a dog. Sei wasn't really picky, especially since both would happen sooner or later anyway. "Okay Naruto, your turn."

I threw out a peace sign and grinned. "Yo, my name's Uzumaki Naruto. I like ramen, especially Ichiraku's, pulling pranks, and math! I hate the three minutes it takes for instant ramen to cook, bullies, boiled turnips," I narrowed my eyes at Kakashi-sensei and Seitaro, both looking particularly unapologetic, "… and being _tardy_. My hobbies are meditating, gardening, and practicing seals. My dream is to make it into the Espi Squad and then become hokage! Believe it!"

Sasuke grunted when I elbowed him in the side. "My name is Uchiha Sasuke. I don't like much of anything besides tomatoes, archery, and being well-rounded in my abilities. I dislike fangirls, people attempting to take advantage of me, natto, and anything sweet. My hobbies include training, taking walks, and helping Misaki proofread her manuscripts. My goals for the future are to find my brother and ask him a few questions." Kakashi raised an eyebrow and glanced at Seitaro, who simply smiled and cocked his head. Sasuke just nodded to Sakura.

"Oh! Um, my name is Haruno Sakura... I enjoy reading pretty much anything, and I also like umeboshi and flower arranging. I don't like spicy foods, being cold, or people who judge others by appearances alone. My hobbies are playing trivia games, studying new material for my medical studies, and window shopping. My dream is to one day be at least half as amazing at medical jutsu as Tsunade of the Sannin."

"Great! You all sound like very boring kids, as you should be." I rolled my eyes. "Now, let's get down to business, aka, your second test."… Wait, what?!

"Oi! What do you mean 'second test' Kaka-sensei?!" I made air quotes and everything. "I thought there weren't gonna be anymore tests!"

The bastard eye-smiled at me again, "Well, passing the graduation exam does mean you have the knowledge required to potentially make it as a shinobi. Unfortunately for you, I have higher standards than the academy."

I flopped onto my back and let out a groan of frustration. "Nooooooo. Why sensei, why?!"

Seitaro smiled, but everyone else just rolled their eyes. "Don't freak Naruto, it's just a simple survival exercise."

My blue eyes snapped open at the words. I immediately sat up and pointed accusingly at the chestnut-haired man. "That's even worse! Your survival tests are horrible Sei!" Beside me, Sasuke nodded in agreement. We both shuddered at the memory of the last time he'd made us do one... So. Many. _Dropbears._ Sometimes, I hate living so close to the Forest of Death.

"Good, that means they're doing their job." responded Seitaro happily.

Kakashi intervened before I could start yelling again. "Luckily, Seitaro-taicho has had nothing to do with this Survival exercise. As he's my assistant, it's up to me to derive a suitable test. In fact, he won't even be partaking in it, simply observing." He eye-smiled in delight as he began looming over us. "I get the three of you all to myself..."

"How... wonderful, sensei," whimpered Sakura, who looked to be paling fast.

 _ **I'm going to enjoy this.**_

Oh, shut up Kyuubi.

* * *

 _Dear Ita-chan,_

 _Oh are you really?! You guys have got to stop by the house so we can finally catch up in person! BRING ME SOME SOUVENIRS TOO! Ah yes, you have told me quite a few funny stories about Kakuzu-san losing his temper. At this point, I feel as if I know most of the Akatsuki personally. I'd like to meet them all in person one day. He actually survived? Wow, that is impressive._

 _Don't worry your little head 'tachi. I took plenty of pictures that I'm sending with this letter. The boys love your gifts, and they've taken to wearing them for their shinobi uniforms. Oh, Sei's keeping busy, one way or another... Hehe~ Whoa, seriously?! That is AWESOME! Do you think I should send you an autographed copy of one of my newer books? I'd love to see their faces!... Nothing is more dangerous than a group of bored s-class criminals, huh?_

 _I have said it time and time again Itachi. As your older sister, it is my sworn duty to know you and all your tells. There are not many, but I've known you since before you ever learned to lie. Hell, I TAUGHT you how. Remember that time when you were three and trying to get a stick of dango on the counter and knocked the whole tray to the floor? And I told you to blame it on the cat? And it worked? Back on topic, I don't mind if he sends me little notes and stuff. I've wanted to meet him for quite some time now anyway._

 _From what little I've seen of her, she hasn't. I think Hana's been mostly focused on earning her Veterinarian's license. Tsume told me she hasn't even been on a date since you left. But she has sworn to let the triplets eat you if she ever sees you again, so there's that..._

 _Better than you,_

 _Misaki_

 _P.S. Hey Fishsticks,_

 _I'm Misaki, Itachi's older sister. He keeps sending me letters... to send me letters? Tell me how he's doing now that he's all on his own in this big scary world of ours? Why else would you send someone a fucking letter? And no, he's not a fucking spy._

 _Rude ass shark,_

 _Misaki_

* * *

 **1) Okay, first and foremost, I AM SO SORRY THIS HAS TAKEN SO DAMN LONG. As I explained last chapter, there are IRL issues that have prevented me being able to update. Example: My twin sister has once again been diagnosed with Leukemia for the 3rd time in five years. She's been hospitalized since before Halloween, and spent three weeks in PICU. But she gets to come home for Christmas, so there's that!**

 **2) My depression has been kicking my ass because of this, and I am in the process of withdrawing from school because of the stress levels. So, yeah...**

 **3) I don't know how good this chappie is anyway, because there were such long intervals between my working on it. I've tried to make it make as much sense as possible.**

 _ **4)**_ _ **The Castle of Kariosutoro- Hayao Miyazaki's first movie, featuring everyone's favorite Thief with a Heart of Gold, Lupin III. I love this movie, it's so fun. I decided to switch some words between the titles, because I highly doubt 'Cagliostro' exists in the Narutoverse. So I went with the Japanese pronunciation instead.**_

 _ **5) Gibbs slap- I am a big fan of NCIS. I regret nothing.**_

 _ **6) What'd y'all think of Sakura and their introductions? Is everyone still in character, despite this still technically being an AU?**_

 _ **7) Also, this chapter is 35 pages long and has over 16,000 words. WHOO~ PARTY!~**_

… _ **.. HAVE A GOOD DAY AND HAPPY HOLIDAYS TO EVERYONE!**_


	12. Omakes ch1 (Please don't Eat me)

**Okay guys, let me just say that CHAPTER 12 IS STILL A THING, AND WILL BE COMING OUT... eventually. Go to my profile for more info.**

 **This chapter is something to tide y'all over until I'm finished with Chapter 12 and also the best way for my readers to be informed of all the changes I've made (like the title, for instance *whistles innocently*).**

 **Enjoy!**

 **Disclaimer: I don't own shit.**

* * *

Omake 1: _A Day in the Life of Everyone's Favorite Weasel_

Sometimes, Itachi wondered just how in the hell his fellow Akatsuki members were all considered S-Class. Oh, they were all quite powerful in their own right and had the insanity to match (a common theory being the more powerful a shinobi, the less sane they were, and what did that say about him?), but still, the Uchiha couldn't help but wonder occasionally.

Like now, for instance.

Itachi sighed into his tea and took another sip as several roars of confused rage echoed throughout the compound. Across the table, Kisame gave him a toothy grin. The both of them were still in their nightclothes, and Itachi had left his hair down, though brushed, for the moment. He usually got dressed before going to breakfast, but the sharingan-user had caught some sort of virus during the pair's tour of the Land of Hot Springs and was feeling _spectacularly_ horrible enough to just not care at the moment.

"Looks like they found them, Itachi-san. The others sound pissed," laughed Kisame as a door slammed down the hallway and angry cursing followed after.

"WHAT THE FUCK UCHIHA, UN?!"

Itachi gave a deadpan stare at his companion. "If they destroy those books, I'm holding you responsible, as it was your idea."

He received a toothy grin, "With what money? We barely have enough to buy supplies for missions, even pooling our paychecks."

"Maybe, if you both stopped going to so many tea houses and hotels, you'd actually be able to afford food," scolded Kakuzu as he wandered into the room.

"Well, unlike you, the rest of us prefer some modicum of comfort over roughing it every now and again."

"Besides, I've had your homemade 'ration bars,' Kakuzu, and I'm not afraid to say that a one-armed civilian can cook better than you," stated Kisame. It was true, Misaki made some damn good ration bars.

A derisive snort came from the doorway. "Fucking _Tobi_ can cook better than the godless miser."

Itachi heaved another internal sigh. There went his quiet morning. Kami, his head was pounding already. "Good morning Hidan. Thank you for wearing pants."

The silver-haired Jashinist rolled his eyes and poured a cup of coffee, "Have to protect your delicate fucking sensibilities somehow Uchiha." _That_ 'coversation' had been had multiple times just during this stop by base.

"Your sacrifice is appreciated, I assure you." Hidan jumped and almost dropped his cup as Sasori made his presence known. Deidara, looking quite enraged, was not far behind him.

"Uchiha, where the fuck did you get these, un?!" The blonde held up several volumes, all of which had 'Kishimoto Misaki' inscribed in whimsical, yet elegant, font down the spines. "Do you even know how expensive these are?! They're _autographed_ for kami's sake, un! And you have the whole series so far!"

Beside him, Kisame snorted into his own cup of tea, and Itachi withheld another sigh. "They were a birthday present, if you must know. I turned eighteen last week. I am willing to loan them out to those interested, as long they return in good or even better shape. Which means that you had best buy your own copies, Deidara."

The whole of the kitchen was silent in shock, though not for long. "I think that's the most I've ever heard you speak, Uchiha. Holy fuck." Black tendrils shot from Kakuzu and quickly silenced Hidan once again.

"Shut up, your voice grates on my nerves," His fellow immortal stated, acid green eyes never leaving Itachi's serene personage. Hidan could only scream in rage through the thread sewing his mouth shut.

"Hi guys! What's everyone doing in here?~"

"Well, we," Kisame gestured to himself and Itachi with a irritated growl, " _were_ having a nice quiet breakfast." Not that his Uchiha friend had been doing much eating so far. Itachi ate like a bird most of the time anyway, especially compared to Kisame, but he hadn't even bothered with anything other than a few bites of toast. He really was feeling rather horrible.

Sasori's hulking form did a sort of shrug, chittering as the puppets' joints met. "Until Deidara discovered Itachi's newest acquisitions." The only blonde amongst the Akatsuki scowled and plopped the books in question on the kitchen table, causing it's contents to rattle. Kakuzu steadied the fruit bowl, muttering about how ceramic bowls were expensive.

"Ooh, ooh! Itachi-senpai, can Tobi borrow one?!~ No one else will let him, but Tobi really wants to read them! Please?~ Tobi's a good boy and won't let anything happen to your book! Pleeaaaase?!~"

To everyone else, it sounded as if the masked man was almost whining, but Itachi heard it for what it was. A command. For some reason, Madara had become interested in Misaki's novels. Strange, but it really wasn't any of his business what his elder did. Wordlessly, the Uchiha nodded and passed 'Castle of Kariosutoro: Limited Edition Copy with Exclusive Interview with Author!' to Tobi.

"Thank you Itachi-senpai! Tobi'll give it back as soon as he's done, because Tobi is a good boy!" And with that, he was gone. Just in time to hear Deidara complain.

"Oh, so you'll let the man-child borrow one your oh-so-precious books, but not anyone else, un!?"

Itachi sighed aloud and dumped his tea down the sink. "I'm going back to sleep Kisame. Wake me up when it's time to go please."

The shark-man toasted his partner with the mug held in his hand. "Sure thing Itachi-san!"

* * *

Omake 1: _Home is Where the Heart Is_

What the hell was that about?! He couldn't understand what had suddenly come over him, ordering Itachi to loan Tobi the book. It was for children, and he honestly had no interest in the story. But by the time he'd even realized he'd spoken, it was already too late. Oh well, at least it fit with his role as Tobi.

Obito took off the orange abomination that dared to be called a mask and tossed it into a random corner of the room. He'd liked orange as a child, and still did actually, but the mask was just... _ugh_. Too much. Obito sighed deeply and collapsed onto his bed, gazing up at the book he'd 'begged' off his cousin.

' _Castle of Kariosutoro'_ The first installment of both the Hayao Fantasy series and the Lupin III novella anthologies. Written by none other than Kishimoto Misaki. He couldn't help the small, proud smile that grew on his face at the very idea.

 _She'd made it._

Despite everything else in her life having slowly gone to shit, Misaki had made it.

Obito rolled onto his stomach with a laugh and turned on the bedside lamp, it's soft glow chasing away the almost pitch black of the room. Even if the base had been built with windows, they'd have been pointless with the constant rain of Amegakure. There was no such thing as 'natural light' here.

"Wait a second...," muttered the uchiha under his breath. He knew this story. Had she told it to him before...? Scooting closer to the lamp, Obito cracked open the novel and landed on the dedication page.

 _ **This book would not be possible without the following people;**_

 _ **My family in general for putting up with me,**_

 _ **Seitaro, best friend and love of my life, for bringing me coffee when the voices won't shut up and let me sleep,**_

 _ **Naruto, little brother extraordinaire #1, for buying the groceries and tending the garden when I can't,**_

 _ **Sasuke, little brother extraordinaire #2 (they are not in any particular order you two, stop arguing), for being my sounding-board and getting me out of my office to make dinner and be social,**_

 _ **Kakashi, pseudo-older brother and local dog whisperer, for finally murdering that clock in the hallway (may it burn in hell forever and ever),**_

 _ **Kakashi's dogs, of which there are far too many to name, for letting me cuddle with them whenever my own characters make me sad,**_

 _ **And Iruka, good friend and lightest-weight of us all, for being the voice in the back of our heads shouting 'don't do that, it's illegal!' Your efforts are appreciated, even if we never listen.**_

 _ **This book was written in loving memory of;**_

 _ **Kishimoto Jinzaburo, for what better parent is there than one who gives their life so that their child doesn't have to? Thank you Tou-san.**_

 _ **My foster-parents, for loving me and trusting their son in my proverbial hands (as I only really have the one),**_

 _ **Uchiha Mikoto-oba, for granting me custody of Sasuke, teaching me to cook and calling me the daughter you never had,**_

 _ **Uchiha Fugaku-oji, for granting me custody of your son, buying me a HOUSE, and this sweet gig at Drunken Toad Publishing you sneaky bastard. Also, you were my favorite (only, as far as I know) uncle.**_

 _ **And Uchiha Obito-nii, the best older brother a little girl can buy/steal from her foster-father's genin team. All it took for you was ice cream, so you were pretty cheap as far as brothers go. You were also an idiot, and never on time because you couldn't make yourself not stop to help old ladies with their groceries, but you were my permanently tardy idiot with a heart of gold. I miss you dumbass.**_

Obito let out the breath he didn't even realized he'd been holding. His chest felt tight and his eye was burning with what were probably unshed tears. The uchiha hadn't cried in a long time, not since... not since Rin, but just that little blurb was enough to get him almost sobbing. Misaki had always been good at that, damn her. After all these years, he still had a soft spot for the girl he once called imouto.

Obito guessed he probably always would.

She had only gotten better with words as the years had passed, it seemed. He had loved to hear her tell stories after team dinners at Minato and Kushina's house, the adults drinking coffee and the rest of them with hot cocoa or tea. There was no drinking allowed in the Namikaze household, Kushina had forbidden it. Obito had always sensed a story there, something to do with the sheen of gold dust he'd find every now and again in corners and behind furniture, and how Fugaku-oji-sama never could look Kushina in the eye when he was over.

He felt his body grow heavier and his breathing slow.

Team dinners were always so much fun, a nice way to get hyped for a mission or relax after coming home. Sometimes, Minato and Kushina would let them stay the night if the team had an early start in the morning. Kushina would make such amazing food, despite the rationing because of the war, helped by the garden Misa-chan insisted on having on the balcony. There was something about a homegrown salad with fresh dressing and a glass of lemonade with sprigs of mint and rosemary that had always connected with him on a spiritual level.

Obito hadn't felt this relaxed in years. He usually hated to sleep because of nightmares, but for some reason, here he was. Drifting away on thoughts of dinner with his genin team, with his little sister...

Thoughts of home, he realized with a subdued start. He was thinking of _home_. But it wasn't the village. It didn't seem to matter where he changed the setting to, the people all stayed the same. Or more rather, the _person_ stayed the same. Obito knew what she looked like, now she was older, her picture was on the back of the book he grasped loosely in his hand as he drifted off to sleep. _Misaki was home._ Not Minato or Kushina, not his grandmother, or even... even Rin. Not even Rin meant home anymore, because she was dead and Misaki was not.

Kami, he missed her. He missed his imouto so much.

 _"Man Kakashi, that story suuucked," exclaimed Obito once his silver-haired teammate had finished his tale. Beside the Uchiha sat a small redheaded girl with eyes like blue-grey marble and bronze freckles peppering her face. The pair of them were in nightclothes and clutching still-steaming mugs of hot chocolate to their chests._

 _Kakashi looked only a little ridiculous in his own pajamas along with his ever present mask. Misaki had tried to steal it earlier while he'd been in the shower, but he kept spares for a reason. "Oh really? You do better then."_

 _"I liked your story Kakashi," said Rin, clad in leggings and a long shirt. The prodigy nodded his head in acknowledgement._

 _Obito was very tempted to glare at the other teen, but decided he'd try not to fight with Kakashi over Rin tonight. They were leaving on a long mission tomorrow morning and tensions would be high enough. "Oh not me, I'm pants at telling stories, but Misa-chan's really good at it. Come on Misa, tell us a story!"_

 _Misaki blinked at her couch partner in shock and looked around the room. Rin looked interested, Kakashi bored (big surprise), and Kushina wore an indulging smile. Minato, however, simply gave her a nod of encouragement. She smiled back. "Okay, what kind of story do you want to hear?"_

 _Obito grinned and gave a delighted shout. "Something with lots of action!"_

 _"Ugh, Obi-nii, do you even know me?" scoffed the eight year old. "Of course there'll be action."_

 _Rin, however, blushed in response to the younger girl's agreement. "Maybe... a little romantic?" She glanced at Kakashi from the corner of her eye, and Misaki rolled her eyes, but agreed. Kakashi shrugged and reached for another handful of snacks when the readhead's gaze landed on him._

 _"And I know Kushi-kaa likes action too, but what about you Mina-tou?~ What are you in the mood for?"_

 _Minato smiled at the nickname. "I think I'd prefer a fairytale to be honest, Misa-chan."_

 _"Hmm..." Misaki nodded and tapped her chin in thought. "A fairytale with lots of action and some romance?" Blue eyes wide, the child snapped her fingers with a grin. "Oh, that's perfect!"_

 _"Pick one, did you?" laughed Kushina._

 _"Yup!"_

 _Obito jumped up and down in excitement. "Well come on, we don't have all night! Let's hear it!"_

 _Misaki grinned and began her tale after taking a long draw from her drink. The Uchiha glared at her. "Alright, alright... Once upon a time, in a far off land, there was a castle."_

 _Kakashi blinked and raised an eyebrow. "A castle? Seriously?"_

 _"A castle." She nodded wisely, and the adults chuckled. "And this castle was know throughout the world of Ghibli."_

 _"Wherever do you come up with these names sweetie?"_

 _"They just come to me, I guess! Anyway, the castle was full of treasures and knowledge so legendary that it was almost unbelievable. To most, it was, for that's just what it was. A legend, with nothing more than the whispers of supposed sightings to keep the tale alive."_

 _Obito looked slightly confused as he asked, "Why don't they believe it's true? Couldn't they just find the castle?"_

 _Misaki smiled. "It's very hard to find something if it's constantly moving, never in the same place twice."_

 _"What? How? Castles don't just up and move whenever they feel like it Misaki."_

 _"Well this one does, and stop interrupting me!"_

 _Kakashi scoffed but quieted anyway._

 _She glared at him. "Thank you. As I was saying, the castle constantly moved and thus no one could find it. Before I really get into this story, you should know the castle's name..."_

 _"And what is that?" asked Minato, looking genuinely curious._

 _"Laputa: The Castle in the Sky. And yes, that does mean it flies. Our story begins with a young girl, about you guys' age, being held against her will on a giant airship. This girl's name was Sheeta..."_

* * *

 **Misaki POV**

"Obito!" I gasped, lurching out of my hunched position and knocking assorted papers to the floor. Chest heaving, my eyes swept over my office. It was dark now, almost pitch black. It had been only just sunset when I'd begun working. I must have fallen asleep at my desk. It wasn't the first time, but still so strange. I didn't feel sleepy, I had just had some coffee. And why had I dreamt about Obito? I hadn't done that in years, and yet... I felt my chest tighten to the point it felt like bursting and I choked back a sob. _It had felt so real._

The warmth radiating from his body and into mine as we sat snuggled on the couch as we all swapped gossip and laughter. The calluses on his hands rubbing against my cheek as he moved my bangs out of my face. Obito's loud guffaws when I quipped something particularly funny. The strength he held back as we fought over who got more of the blanket. The wet spot in my hair from his drool when he fell asleep and used me as a pillow.

Grasping his pendant, which had never left its place around my neck, I kissed the warm marble and tried to ignore the tears suddenly streaming down my face and onto the characters carved into the stone. ' _Luck_ ' huh?

"You needed it more than I did, nii-san..." I whispered.

* * *

 **And there we have it folks! I hope y'all liked it.**

 **NOW FOR THE IMPORTANT STUFF.**

 **Title Change:** **I changed the title because I absolutely hated it. With the passion of a thousand suns. Don't ask me why, because I don't know. I mean, if y'all liked the old one, I can change it back, but I honestly prefer 'Stone Eyes Chronicles.'**

 **I CHANGED THE SUMMARY AGAIN, I KNOOOOW. THIS AUTHOR IS VERY FLIGHTY. I'M SURE YOU GUYS HAVE NOTICED THIS BY NOW.**

 **Chapter 12 will (hopefully) coming out soon, please be patient. I write in spurts and I've had writer's block until recently. That's another reason as to why I started doing some omakes, to see if it'd help.**

 **HAVE A GOOD FUCKING DAY!~~**


	13. Omake 2: Homecoming

**Hey guys, this is just gonna be a short little omake to hold y'all over until I either post the first chapter of** **Whispers of Fire & Stone** **, which is a rewrite of Stone Eyes from the very beginning, or my new story** **Persicaria** **, which is a Reincarnated! Uzukage! Naruto fic because I hate myself.**

 **Persicaria's first chapter is pretty much done, only have about 1000 words to go so I can close it up and then I'll be posting it, so if it interests you, keep an eye out. The rewrite is gonna take awhile until it's to my current standards but I'm working on it, I swear.**

 **For now, however, please enjoy my newest omake! This one is my usual combination of humor and bitter-sweetness, as you guys really seem to enjoy the dynamic between Misaki and Obito. Y'all brought this on yourselves.**

 **Also, quite a few of you have been saying that you've never read a SI/OC quite like Misaki or Seitaro (mostly Misaki though), and while this warms the cockles of my shriveled little heart, I will explain why this is so. I am 100% completely unable to keep any of my characters consistent. Their personalities change with my mood. I suck at character interaction, despite what a lot of you say (lookin' at you** _ **Deerdryad**_ **from AO3), and dialogue is haaaard. You guys seem to think I'm pretty creative and actually FUNNY too, which of course makes me go '?WTF?'**

… **.. Ignore all that, the Artist's Self-Esteem (or lack-of) struck me all of a sudden. I'm also too lazy to go back and delete it, even though it would take less effort than completing this sentence.**

 **Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto or anything pertaining to it. I absolutely suck at drawing.**

* * *

 **KAKASHI POV**

Kakashi was finding it increasingly difficult to resist the urge to facepalm as he stood before Misaki's porch, which had gained a rather interesting guardian while they were all away at war. Beside him, Obito stood snickering into his hand, with Naruto and Sasuke loosing fond sighs of exasperation. There was only stunned silence from the gaggle of reincarnated Hokage (plus Madara), though it wasn't long before Minato and Sarutobi both just huffed in clear amusement. Seitaro hadn't even hesitated to run into the house, the obstruction having parted for him and _only him, the_ _ **bastard.**_ They could all hear Misaki's delighted laughter from within as they saw each other for the first time in months. Itachi's pleasantly cool tones could be heard as well.

The soon to be Rokudaime was tired, filthy, and feeling very much older than his thirty-two years. The Fourth Shinobi War had only just ended yesterday, his best friend was actually alive, and he had four Kage (and Madara because the meeting between him and Misaki should prove to be entertaining as hell) following him around on a time limit.

He was not in the mood for his pseudo-sister's bullshit.

Hashirama seemed fascinated, and Tobirama (introducing _him_ to Misaki will be even funnier because she had never truly gotten over her childhood crush on the Nidaime) mildly interested. Madara looked just plain horrified as he muttered a soft, "What... the... _fuck?_ "

"Misaki, your garden's outgrown its patch again," he called into the house.

The redhead popped out of the shoji door and laughed at them, though the pitch made you aware of its half-forcedness. Their absence had been hard on the woman, it was obvious if you knew her. Besides the darker bags under her eyes and thinner face, there seemed to be a sort-of frailty to her wrists and smile that wasn't there before the war. Misaki had always reminded him of glass, unbreakable until under the right pressure. She had fragile spider webs and chips galore, but hadn't shattered yet. Kakashi really didn't want to witness it if she did. "I let it this time. Besides, it's just the one plant that made it over here." Seitaro looked over her and cocked his head, a small smile gracing his tanned face.

Itachi appeared on her other side and gave a small smile. Kakashi was glad his fellow prodigy had improved to the point of no longer being bed-ridden. It had been touch and go for months even with Tsunade's help before she was also needed on the warfront. Winter had come and gone while they'd been all been at war. Itachi had almost left with it because of the weakness in his lungs, according to Misaki's worryingly tearstained letters. But the boy's color was better, he was standing and no longer in the Intensive Care Unit, so that was a plus. The short hair was new though.*

"Well, can you move it? Please?"

Misaki rolled her eyes and grinned at him. "They're just tomatoes Kakashi, kick 'em out of the way." Obito made a strangled noise and Kakashi wondered just how much ninja wire he had left and if it was enough to garrote the scarred man next to him. He took some deep breaths and tried not to think about his blood pressure.

 _1...2...3...4...5..._ "Okay, first of all, I'm not falling for that again. Last time I kicked any of your plants, you decided that it was a good enough reason to kick _me._ " He had never realized until this moment how much he really wouldn't like the First Hokage laughing himself to ground because he was laughing at _Kakashi_ , but the jounin found himself wishing he'd never gotten the chance.

"Because it _was_ , my garden cannot defend itself. Besides, you kicked it way too hard."

He really hoped he wouldn't develop the same eye twitch Inoichi had. "I nudged it with my foot."

If it wasn't for the grin on her face, the fire in Misaki's blue-grey eyes would have led a stranger into thinking she was actually angry. "You turned one of my watermelons into a smoothie Kakashi."

"I did not."

"Yes, you did."

"No, I didn't."

Seitaro grinned widely and stated matter-of-factly, "You actually did Kakashi."

"…. _Anyway_ , back to your tomatoes. I will not be going anywhere near those things."

"What? Why?" She had the nerve to look innocently confused.

"Misaki. They're _growling._ " Naruto burst into guffaws, finally succumbing to the ridiculousness of the situation.

The redhead's smile softened as she caught sight of her family, as if her eyes hadn't been on Naruto and Sasuke the entire conversation. "Yes, they tend to do that when strangers visit."

"Tomatoes are physically incapable of growling. Or sentience, however base it is."

"Obviously not."

" _….Misaki._ "

"Fine, fine. Have it your way." She giggled and leant down to whisper to her tomatoes, which slithered back under the porch. "There, happy now?"

" _Yes._ How much soil from 44 did you use this time?"

Itachi almost rolled his eyes. "She used all of it, undiluted."

She shrugged. "I was curious."

Sasuke sighed loudly, apparently no longer entertained by their argument. "Tadaima Misaki, nii-san."

"Of what? How much it would take for your own plants to be capable of eating you?" Misaki didn't bother to reply as she leapt towards her younger brothers and gathered both of them into her grasp.

Her voice was already thick with tears as she returned the greeting. "Okaeri boys." A shaky gasp. "Okaeri..."

"We missed you too nee-chan," murmured Naruto softly as he returned her hug. She pressed kisses to each of their cheeks and smiled through her tears. Kakashi couldn't help his slight smile, even as she tugged him into the hug as well.

It was good to be home.

* * *

 **MISAKI POV**

It'd been two hours and we couldn't even look each other in the eyes.

"Oi, Itachi-nii, what happened to your hair? It's so short now!" questioned Naruto with his usual enthusiasm as he gestured wildly, chopsticks in hand. Sasuke didn't even pause mid-conversation with Kakashi as he ducked the blonde's flying limb. Mina-tou gave a small smile at his son's antics. Kushina did that too.

Itachi finished his bite of fish before answering. "As I'm sure either Misaki-nee or Kisame told you, winter was not kind to me this year. I grew too weak to even sit up without assistance, let alone brush my hair." He 'hn'ed and took a sip of tea, "So I decided to cut it until I could care for it properly again. "

Naruto grimaced. "Sakura-chan had to cut hers during our chuunin exams because Sasuke and I got our asses kicked."

"She's still mad at you for it." Kakashi eye-smiled at his students, who both winced.

What do you even say in a situation like ours? I'd spent years waiting, practicing and imagining and dreaming, for this moment and now I didn't have any words.

Tobirama glanced up from talking to Minato. "Sakura... She was the pink-haired medic, wasn't she? She was quite good for her age."

Seitaro sipped his sake and smiled, posture proud. "That's our Sakura-chan, been officially training for just barely four years and already on her way to surpassing Tsunade-sama!" His cheeks were only just starting to pink. He was such a lightweight. "It seems like just yesterday she was sitting down at this very table with her new teammates for the first time. A quiet little twelve year old girl with her nose stuck in a medical journal sat next to a surly little Uchiha brat who never talked and an Uzumaki boy who never shut up."

"Hey!" came said Uzumaki's indignant response.

Sasuke rolled his eyes, "I figured Naruto did enough talking for the both of us and more. Never could teach him to be quiet for more than five minutes though."

"Pretty sure it's genetic. Mito couldn't shut up for long either," snorted Madara.

"That would explain a lot, actually...," said Minato with realization on his face, causing most of the table who had known Kushina to chuckle.

I hadn't said a word. Hadn't eaten. It felt as if I did open my mouth, I wouldn't be able to close it again. My gaze was locked unmoving onto his hands, his skin, his hair. Everything other than his face was slowly, painstakingly, burned into my memory. There was the scar on his thumb he'd gotten helping an elder woman pick up pieces of the glass vase she'd dropped in the middle of the street. Our ice cream had melted in my hands while waiting for him.

Kakashi clapped his hands suddenly. "Well, thanks for the food Misa-chan. We'll go ahead and clean up while you and Obito go have a nice, long chat in the garden, hmm? Maybe even at that swing Seitaro built a few years ago for the ducklings?" Nice and far enough from the house that my nosy family couldn't easily eavesdrop.

It was almost funny how fast my dining room cleared out before leaving just the two of us. The resulting absence of noise was even more suffocating than the previously tense atmosphere of dinner.

Obito sighed at me from across the table. "Misaki..."

I stood fast enough to almost make me dizzy. "I think we should talk in the garden like Kakashi said." Mentally, I flinched. I hadn't meant for my voice to sound so cold. But I still couldn't bring myself to look at him, or his own wincing face.

"…. Alright. Lead the way then." I nodded and lead the way to the garden. When we reached it, I couldn't bring myself to sit on the swing and instead sat in the grass, leaning against the base of the tree it hung from. Swings are for happy memories and family. This was not to be the former, and I still hadn't decided on the latter.

It had been so easy to tell myself that I still considered Obito family when he hadn't been here. But I'd seen too many black-lined storage scrolls while volunteering at the tower over the last few months. Too many widows, orphans, and siblings left behind. As someone who valued family over pretty much anything else, did it go against my ideals to continue to think of him as my brother? Was I a hypocrite if I didn't? Could I love a man like my brother in the face of all those who'd lost one because of him?

I felt my eyes beginning to burn already and grasped at my pendant automatically. The kanji for 'luck' was little more than a shadow now, rubbed away over the years.

Obito stilled even as joined me in the grass. "That necklace...You... you kept it. All this time, even after everything I've done?"

I took a deep breath and tried to keep my tone neutral. "I've never taken it off, not since Rin gave it to me at your memorial service." My grip tightened.

"Why?"

I took a deep breath. "Because it's the last gift ever given to me by the boy I called big brother. The only true-reminder I've had for the last eighteen years. Almost every picture we had of you was destroyed the night of the kyuubi attack."

He leant against the tree as well, a breath away from me. We were silent for several minutes, though it wasn't as awkward as you'd think. It felt more like those rare quiet moments we'd shared as children, just being in the other's presence enough. Those stolen hours of forgetting the war, forgetting that Obito risked death every time he walked out the gates, forgetting the slowly worsening pain in my arm.

The wind blew, sending the branches of our tree billowing, leaves fluttering to the ground around us. The air tasted like lightning and was thick with moisture. A storm was coming as something inside me slid back into place.

I felt my chest shake with a gut-wrenching sob.

"Misa-chan... I'm sorry. I'm so sorry." I flinched at the old nickname. "I wouldn't blame you, if... if you decided I'm not family anymore. I don't deserve it. Personally, I think you should have the second Kakashi told you the truth."

I found myself shaking my head as my tears began to mix with the rain. A smile came unbidden to my face. "I've already made my decision, made it along time ago. I just... just needed to talk to you first before I realized it. Once family, always family Obito."

He looked shell-shocked, and just a little hopeful. "I'm not worth it Misaki! I'm just not! Do you even realize what that'll do to your reputation? Considering the sole instigator of the fourth shinobi war family, and by choice instead of blood like Sasuke and Itachi? Think about this!"

I snorted. "Pfft, what reputation?" The rain was coming down harder now. "If anyone needs to think about this, it's you Obito. Take some time, I'll wait." And with that, I stood and headed back inside out the rain.

Obito didn't follow.

It'd been storming for over three hours and he still hadn't come in. In that time, I caught up with Mina-tou and Sarutobi, smacked and scolded Madara for being an ass, and fangirled over Tobirama much to the amusement of Seitaro, who was admittedly a little tipsy.

My smile was growing more genuine by the hour as my house was filled with life, however artificial it was in some cases. I felt the tightness around my eyes fade and skin regained its color. I hadn't realized how much I'd miss having a full house until it was empty.

A hesitant knock came from the front door. He'd made a decision. But my brother was still an idiot about it.

"Oh kami Obito, you're soaked! What did you even do, just stand outside in the rain!?" That painfully familiar sheepish expression looked as charming as ever on the elder Uchiha's face. "You moron! Naruto, get a towel! Ugh, you'll catch your death... AGAIN... at this rate!" So I might have still been paranoid about illnesses after Itachi but whatever.

There was a laugh in his voice. "Okay nee-chan."

Even Obito looked ready to laugh."Misaki, I'm fine, really. I've been through worse than a cold from the rain." I ignored the guffaws from the dining area and snatched the towel from my little brother.

I scowled at him as I scrubbed his hair with the towel. "I don't give a damn! You look like a drowned rat!"

"Ow! Hey, not so rough!"

"Oh hush, you big baby."

He laughed and grasped my hands to still them. "First of all, abuse! Second, pretty sure _you're_ the baby in this relationship."

My heart skipped a beat as hope filled my chest. Weakly, I muttered, "Technically, Naruto's the baby of the family..."

The Uchiha smiled. "Tadaima... imouto."

"O-Okaeri... nii-san." My breath was shaky, even as my older brother pulled me into a hug. "…. Ugh, now I'm wet too. _Thanks_ nii-san."

"Just doing my job."

* * *

 **AN: And that's a wrap folks. Wow, this was a long ass Omake. I didn't mean for it to be this fucking long. Don't you hate it when characters take over? I do. Oh well, hope you enjoyed.**

 **ALSO, ANY AND ALL OMAKE I WRITE ARE TO BE CONSIDERED CANON FOR IT'S SPECIFIC STORY.**


	14. Indefinite Hiatus Mourning Period

So, um... My twin sister passed away early yesterday morning, at about 2 am. There's gonna be an indefinite hiatus until I'm mentally in a place where I can write again. Sorry guys.


End file.
